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How to reach out to past employment offer

About a year ago, while still working at Company A, I interviewed for Company B. I declined the offer at the time; but they said their door is always open for me if I change my mind. How do I reach out now and try again?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 7:11 AM on May 27, 2015 (2 comments)

Canadian volunteering for a year in the US for a religious nonprofit

My girlfriend and I will be volunteering at a mountain retreat center/camp in the US for a year. This retreat center is a religious nonprofit affiliated with a mainline protestant denomination and has existed since the '60s (and I have visited it many times before, as a member of that denomination). We will be paid a stipend of $550 a month each and have benefits like room & board, health and dental insurance...or at least I, as a US citizen, will get them. What does my girlfriend, as a Canadian citizen, need to provide to US immigration (specifically DHS at the border) to have the greatest chance of receiving that stipend and/or benefits?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 11:08 PM on May 26, 2015 (1 comment)

Hookup etiquette, campsite rule edition

I met someone several years younger than me on a hookup site. We met and I'm pretty sure he felt nervous about his performance. What else could / should I have done?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 11:07 PM on May 26, 2015 (6 comments)

How to cure anger and feelings of bitter entitlement?

I am middle-aged. Without going into my personal history, it is sufficient to say I feel like life is consistently, repeatedly short-changing me over time. I am not exaggerating when I say that I basically have no one available who truly cares about me on a level beyond what I can do for them because I have no social status to speak of and life consistently goes horribly awry for me.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 11:07 PM on May 26, 2015 (19 comments)

I would like to not wear pants.

I am looking for a new job that is telecommute. That is my only reason for leaving. How do I address in interviews since "looking for a new challenge" doesn't exactly fit?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 2:12 PM on May 26, 2015 (16 comments)

Is dating for men easier in SF or NYC?

I'm a 30-year-old straight single guy, debating a move to either NYC or SF. Singledom has been getting tiresome (after 6+ months), and I'd be interested in knowing whether dating would be substantially better or easier in one or the other city. I'm a slightly nerdy (but by no-means super-geeky) and fairly athletic/outdoorsy highly-educated professional. In either city, I'd be living in or near the urban center.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 1:35 PM on May 26, 2015 (12 comments)

Considering putting an offer on a house but need input

Please advise if this house mught be a good investment. I saw it a while back and liked a lot about it but certain factors turned me off from it. Now that it's had a price reduction i'm reconsidering if it's a worthwhile investment. I plan to live in it but resale value is important to me as I don't know how long I plan to stay and want to be able to sell it quickly without losing money. Details below
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 2:58 PM on May 25, 2015 (15 comments)

Help me help my friend through addiction

A good friend has a drug problem (pain pills & xanax). He has been taking Subutex for a few weeks now and will be crashing at my place temporarily. How do I best help him through this? Tips, tricks, advice... things I should expect?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 8:22 AM on May 25, 2015 (23 comments)

IUD Argh!

I have a copper IUD (Paraguard) that was inserted about 1 month ago. I've been feeling absolutely terrible this past month. Pain, anxiety, discomfort - every day. I think I want to ask my doctor to remove the IUD, but I'm nervous for a few reasons (maybe because of my overall increased anxiety?) Any tips?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 6:20 AM on May 25, 2015 (21 comments)

Help me focus away from nauseating thoughts

I ate something that is against my beliefs, for the first time in my entire life (due to a miscommunication). I feel very nauseated - my thoughts focus on my body and wanting to throw up (I tried but am unable to?). Can I refocus thought away from the thing inside me? Or you know any help for nausea that is just psychosomatic? I know I did not do this on purpose, it's that I can't escape my thoughts about the physical act of chewing and swallowing it and about the animal dying for it.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 8:39 PM on May 24, 2015 (14 comments)

I don't want to be her suicide letter.

My long-distance partner is suicidal, and I don't know what to do.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 7:07 PM on May 24, 2015 (8 comments)

Career question: how to transition out of nonprofit track?

I have worked for the federal government for five years (2 on Capitol Hill and 3 in SLC) and also for a well respected local nonprofit here in Salt Lake City, UT for the past two years. I'm Associate Director and things are good. However, unless I become Exec. Director there isn't much upward mobility. Plus, I wrote another question earlier this year about avoiding burnout, which is a problem with nonprofits, long hours, small staffs, etc. What I'm saying is I can't see working in the nonprofit world long term. I don't really see myself transferring to another nonprofit in town either.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 10:05 PM on May 23, 2015 (8 comments)

Should I tell my partner I think I may have herpes before I get tested?

Yesterday after masturbating my penis was unusually irritated. When I looked at it under a good light, I saw several small bumps on the head that look sort of like the pictures of herpes one finds through a Google image search (if smaller and milder). I have an appointment to get tested on Tuesday. In the meantime, do I just keep my lips and pants zipped with my partner, or should I bring it up? (Bonus question: is there some other thing that this might be, given that it only became apparent after the masturbation?)
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 10:05 PM on May 23, 2015 (20 comments)

My tonsils are driving me crazy.

I've been plagued by tonsil stones (tonsilloliths) for the past few months and they are making me deeply unhappy. Have you had them and managed to get rid of them without a tonsillectomy? What did you do?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 4:32 PM on May 22, 2015 (18 comments)

What're the smartest ways I can handle my student loans?

I just got my MFA! Hooray! I just saw my student loans! Oh no! Here's the skinny: I owe about $117,000 with an average interest rate of 6.5%. But! I got a great job that pays about $85k, so we'll call it even on the risk/reward front. What're the best policies for paying back student loans? Are there tips and tricks? Things I should be doing now as opposed to later? What's the deal with refinancing? Is there such a thing as private financing (i.e., you agree to pay all my loans and then I pay you at like 3%?) for student loans? This whole field is kind of a mystery and while I intend to pay my loans in full, I want to make sure I'm being as smart about it as possible. Given my salary and average living cost, I can afford to put in about 40k a year.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 4:31 PM on May 22, 2015 (14 comments)

I asked him to leave. He left. Now I'm crushed.

I'll try to keep this brief. My boyfriend and I have been together for over 2 years. In this time, I found out he was a recovering alcoholic. I didn't know this until months into our relationship. After dating 15 months, we moved into together. That's when the fun starts...
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 7:30 AM on May 22, 2015 (26 comments)

Walking while flipping out

I have recurring episodes of social anxiety that are making it difficult for me to move around effectively, let alone make plans and follow through with them. Passing people on the sidewalk I feel anxious that I will be making them uncomfortable if I walk too close behind, or pass them too fast, or look at them or avoid looking at them... I realize this makes me show anxious body language which in turn makes others genuinely uncomfortable, starting a vicious cycle.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 7:28 AM on May 22, 2015 (11 comments)

You're my ex-boyfriend. How would you want to find out I'm engaged?

My (current) boyfriend (fiancé!) proposed to me very recently and we've been letting our family and friends know at our own pace. I'm very fond of my ex-boyfriend and I want him to find out in the least weird or awkward way. What is that?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 2:05 PM on May 21, 2015 (40 comments)

Help me get over a three-night stand

I had an unexpectedly emotionally intimate experience with someone impossible about a month ago, and I can't seem to move past it. Help me process the aftermath?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 12:49 PM on May 21, 2015 (19 comments)

I would like to stop feeling and living like this.

How does a constant hypochondriac and anxiety sufferer just live and feel like a regular person?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 8:24 AM on May 21, 2015 (18 comments)

How to temporarily put a parking sticker on a car

My workplace demands a permanent sticker in the back windshield of all cars on the premises. I hate having stickers on my car. The rules state the sticker cannot be taped, etc. but held by its adhesive. Can anyone help me brainstorm a hack to make this sticker look like it's put right on the windshield, but have it actually on in such a way that I can put it on before work and take it off after?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 3:08 PM on May 20, 2015 (12 comments)

Need help locating an example of a VAT stamp

What does a customs stamp look like on a VAT refund form?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 3:08 PM on May 20, 2015

I have the parachute; when do I jump?

I have my own business, but I can't work with my business partner much longer. For various reasons, my exit plans keep shifting back.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 7:21 AM on May 20, 2015 (6 comments)

Should I ask my uncle about his Big Secret car crash from 50 years ago?

This AskMe from 2010 is me. When I wrote that, I had just heard about a car crash my uncle was allegedly in when he was in his early 20s, where he was driving and a passenger died. I never asked about the crash and a newspaper search didn't pull anything up at the time. But I recently stumbled upon an old newspaper article that confirmed it. I don't know what to do, or not do, with this information. He has never even hinted about anything like this.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 7:19 AM on May 20, 2015 (61 comments)

Good Lord Please Make My Butt Itch Go Away

My butt itches constantly. Mostly at night but during the day as well. I'm tired of it and want it to stop once and for all. What can I do?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 11:13 PM on May 19, 2015 (28 comments)

Please help me figure out what to do with the rest of my life.

I'm at a point in my life where progress has stopped and I need to make some decisions about how to move forward. I can't keep doing what I've been doing and I could use some advice on new things to try. Difficulty level: late 30s emotional wreck in need of new direction. As ever, special snowflake details and apologetic wall of text inside.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 11:13 PM on May 19, 2015 (6 comments)

How does my company know I used duplicate passwords?

I started a new job last week, which involved registering for a bunch of different tools and services (email, internal tools, ticket tracking system, project management stuff, etc.). Since I needed access to those before I got a chance to set up a password manager, I used a couple duplicate passwords so I could remember them (they were strong passwords, but they fit a pattern that I can remember). Shortly after I signed into a site with one of the passwords I was also using on another site, I got an email from IT saying they'd noticed I'd used duplicate passwords and to change them ASAP. How did they know?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 1:53 PM on May 19, 2015 (15 comments)

How to help a trans teen when we're friends with his parents?

We're friends with a family with a possibly trans teen, and the parents don't seem to be taking it seriously (e.g., not using his preferred pronoun). What, if anything, could we do to help?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 12:24 PM on May 19, 2015 (13 comments)

Cookbook Reviews: what would you want to read?

I've been put in charge of the cookbook section at my Library, and I've been asked to do something interesting to promote them. I was thinking of creating a tumblr or Instagram-style blog to show them off. Please help me figure out how best to do this.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 2:49 AM on May 19, 2015 (17 comments)

Help me feel closer to my mother

I have an intense, complex relationship with my mother, and it's stressing me out. Snowflakes inside.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 2:47 AM on May 19, 2015 (18 comments)

Why is this device shorting out my power?

Why would using an American electrical device on European voltage cause it to short out circuits at home when I plug it in again after coming home to the US?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 7:47 PM on May 18, 2015 (8 comments)

What is the risk that I have passed HIV to my boyfriend?

Three weeks ago I drunkenly cheated on my boyfriend with a stranger. I'm a gay man, I was the bottom and we didn't use a condom. During the next 2 weeks I stupidly tried to forget about the incident and continued having unprotected sex with my boyfriend. He is a circumcised top. What kind of risk does he face?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 6:06 PM on May 17, 2015 (26 comments)

How do I change jobs (and move cities) like a grown up?

How do I time giving notice to current boss and finding a similar job in a different city? I'm worried that If I apply for similar jobs in a different city, potential new bosses may know current boss.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 8:31 AM on May 17, 2015 (3 comments)

How to handle a lease buyout offer (NYC)

The management company for my apartment has approached me with a lease buyout offer in NYC. I am open to discussion but am unsure of the best way to handle it. Should I get a lawyer or some other professional? Any specific recommendations or types of people to look for? Other things I should do?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 7:01 PM on May 16, 2015 (13 comments)

What can I tell myself to keep from complaining @ work?

I intend to leave my job in a few months. I would like to bite my lip and suck up any stupid stuff until then. Unfortunately, I have instead been complaining to my managers (never to fellow employees). I feel like I'm showing my hand for no reason and it's undignified. Next time, when I'm talking to my manager and feel frustrated, what are some things (mantras, poetry, general rational thoughts) I could tell myself to keep my thoughts to myself even if I'm certain it won't affect my employment?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 3:13 PM on May 16, 2015 (17 comments)

Is it okay to want more interesting friends? Can I get them?

After years of tricky life circumstances, I don't have much of a social circle left and I probably seem like a boring workaholic loner, which totally isn't attractive to people who, well, have the kind of fun I'd like to have. Should I just make friends with available people I have little in common with, or can I be more likeable to people who already have active, interesting social lives?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 12:01 PM on May 16, 2015 (16 comments)

I can't be the only one who enjoys this..

Before unlimited long distance and minutes, cheap webcams, highspeed internet, and skype.. you could sign up for ICQ, mock up a profile of what you wanted and what you were interested in.. and find people interested in online sexual interactions, otherwise known as cybering or cybersex.. where does one go for that now?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 6:06 AM on May 16, 2015 (10 comments)

How much should I charge for freelance work?

I have been offered the chance to do some freelance work on the side while I'm on the hunt for permanent employment. But I don't know what to charge. Can you help?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 3:59 PM on May 15, 2015 (5 comments)

How long can I wait on a job offer?

I recently interviewed for two tenure track positions in a STEM field at two local community colleges. The one I want less is probably going to make a decision first. How long can I ask them to wait?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 7:16 AM on May 15, 2015 (11 comments)

Double Vision (Monocular Diplopia)

For the past 6 months or so I’ve been having a problem with double vision after a day of work in front of a computer screen. This is monocular diplopia, that is, double vision that still occurs when one eye is closed (it’s about equal in both eyes). I’ve seen an ophthalmologist who said it appeared to be caused by dry spots on my corneas and the artificial tears he had me tried don’t seem to alleviate the double vision. Has anyone dealt with anything similar?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 7:16 AM on May 15, 2015 (9 comments)

Surprise poly desires in a monogamous relationship.

My wife has recently announced that she is likely polyamorous, complete with relatively long term poly-crush, while I am... not so much. This is........ a bit of a mess.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 3:19 PM on May 14, 2015 (36 comments)

Dealing with lack of everything

Basically, stuff happened in the last 1-2 months and I lost everything. Currently, trying to survive and wait it out. I'm searching for any resources related to unemployment/no income that I may have missed accidentally searching on my own.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 3:17 PM on May 14, 2015 (14 comments)

Take A (4800 mile) Hike

My (US Citizen) husband recently indicated that he’d like me (a UK Citizen) to leave. Where do I start?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 11:14 AM on May 14, 2015 (21 comments)

The State of Condos in Seattle

So I'm considering purchasing a condo in Seattle (Ballard, specifically), but I'll be moving cross-country in doing so, and I'm unfamiliar with the local market. A friend who lives there suggested that condos aren't popular in the greater Seattle area, and that they're hard to sell once purchased. Is that true? In general, how is the market for condos in Seattle?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 12:49 PM on May 13, 2015 (6 comments)

Cannabis for pain

I am embarrassingly new to pot, medical or otherwise. It seems to be helping with my pain, but I really don't know what I'm doing.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 10:59 AM on May 13, 2015 (16 comments)

Help me ask a woman out. Easy, right?

I need help asking a woman out for the first time since the "opening" of my marriage.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 6:13 AM on May 13, 2015 (18 comments)

Homework and vegetables girlfriend. Bleh

I'm not jealous of the other women, I'm jealous of how they make him feel. What do?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 1:32 AM on May 13, 2015 (20 comments)

Federal Employment Program for Persons with Disabilities

I'm on a low-level job hunt - I have a decent job, but I'd like to relocate closer to my family sometime in the next couple years. I'm also HIV+. I've never been sick and never considered myself 'disabled.' However, I just learned that being positive might qualify me for non-competitive recruitment for positions I'm applying for under the Federal Employment Program for Persons with Disabilities.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 10:01 AM on May 12, 2015 (3 comments)

Stepdaughter (13) started shaving all pubes. Should I talk to her?

Her father told me about the pubes when he discovered her shaving in the shower a few weeks ago. He asked her to stop doing it, but I’ve since seen her undressed and she continues to shave it all off. Around the same time as this started she announced that she now has a boyfriend, also 13.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 10:01 AM on May 12, 2015 (67 comments)

How to not think about relationship troubles

I'm in a serious relationship that might be ending. How do I let myself not have constant anxious thoughts about this?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 7:14 PM on May 11, 2015 (8 comments)

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