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Should I help a colleague with a job? Even if I find them mildly evil?

This is the prettiest question I've asked and I feel pretty crap asking it. However, I'm a student about to enter the working world for the first time, so I don't know what the rules are around this kind of thing. Help please?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 4:12 AM on May 26, 2016 (37 comments)

Staying with NHS GP when homeless and moving around?

UK Healthcare: Is there a way of remaining registered with your GP when recently homeless and staying with friends in other cities? Or accessing GP services generally without a permanent address?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 4:12 AM on May 26, 2016 (4 comments)

Blowback after expressing concerns of co-worker's suicide risk

A friend from work (Rachel) disclosed to one of her close friends (Monica) that someone on her team (Phoebe) had expressed suicidal ideation that was becoming seriously concerning. Monica works at another location, so Rachel talked with Monica in order to get advice on how to report her concern while remaining anonymous, avoiding blowback, and keeping the trust of her team-mate. Instead, Monica immediately reported her concern to the regional manger, Phoebe was immediately suspended and told Rachel reported her. Blowback has ensued. How does my friend deal with this perceived lack of professionalism?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 12:07 PM on May 25, 2016 (13 comments)

I got the job! Marketing Director at Regional Theater. Now what?

In the fall I will be taking over the position of Marketing Director at a regional, equity theater (yea!). Can anyone in a similar position point me to great resources or offer any nuggets of wisdom/advice? None of my official education was really in marketing. 9 million thanks in advance.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 5:39 AM on May 25, 2016 (3 comments)

Where can I buy a shark ring in NYC?

Where can I buy a shark ring in NYC as soon as possible?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 2:43 PM on May 24, 2016 (7 comments)

Resources for parenting defiant young teen

My family is in crisis. My son is 13 and in 7th grade. He's generally responsible but lately has been pushing boundaries. He lost his phone (to us) following poor behavior recently. Things have escalated. We have a family therapist, but she's booked up for months, and I am waiting to hear back from her via email. I need to know what my resources are because my family needs help.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 8:14 AM on May 24, 2016 (48 comments)

Help me manage wedding drama before it becomes wedding drama

My partner proposed to me yesterday! Hooray! We will be planning a very small wedding (under 20 guests). Here's the thing: neither of us like the woman my brother is dating.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 9:19 PM on May 23, 2016 (14 comments)

How to ask for help finding a job without being a jerk

I have some quasi-friends that I used to work with, and I feel guilty about not keeping in touch with them. Now I need their help finding a job. Can I email them and say "Hey, I have been ignoring you but now I'm your friend because I need a favor from you," except not be a jerk?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 3:00 PM on May 23, 2016 (18 comments)

Cats. Money. Grief. Stress.

All three of my cats have been hospitalized this year for various reasons. I’ve spent about $10,000 on vet bills since February of this year. They’re still not healthy.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 1:17 AM on May 22, 2016 (23 comments)

What to do with this money, right now?

Because Reasons, I suddenly will be receiving $450K from a family inheritence. I'm in California. I have, like, a normal-sized bank account like normal people who don't usually receive $450K suddenly. I am going to have to find a financial planner who can advise me how to deal with this money long-term, but where am I going to put it, like, next week when they want to give this to me?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 1:17 AM on May 22, 2016 (24 comments)

How to be a partner to a person with cancer?

I don't know what I can do to help my partner come to terms with his illness.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 1:17 AM on May 22, 2016 (13 comments)

Severe depression and job search

Feeling serious despair. I left a toxic work environment, yet not in the smartest way and that was a year ago. I've done some PT work before moving to another state.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 7:20 AM on May 21, 2016 (13 comments)

Low Libido... Nooooooooo

I’m a 35-yr-old cis woman married to a wonderful man. I’m attracted to him in every way, and we’ve been together for 10 years. This is the first time I’ve needed to reach out for this problem…
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 7:19 AM on May 21, 2016 (18 comments)

Complicated household finances

What experts do my fiance and I need to help us figure out our complicated multinational financial situation?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 10:36 PM on May 20, 2016 (12 comments)

Employer doesn't know how pay promised insurance benefit

Employer promised health insurance and is now saying the Affordable Care Act is too confusing to figure out.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 7:48 AM on May 20, 2016 (11 comments)

Fix or abandon an LTR?

Our six-year-plus relationship has gone south in a matter of days. I said and did things I could have said and done better and that I regret. I've apologized, but she remains in noncommunicating mode.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 9:35 AM on May 19, 2016 (61 comments)

Apply for deam job at dream company - but pregnant?

The job I've been waiting for at the company I've been waiting for just posted, should I apply while 5 months pregnant?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 11:19 PM on May 17, 2016 (13 comments)

Asbestos abatement

We're considering buying an old house with asbestos and having a hard time figuring out who to trust and what is reasonable.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 11:19 PM on May 17, 2016 (9 comments)

Help me end my long term relationship … or help me fix it?

My LTR has a lot going for it but I don't think the good outweighs the bad and I am trying to end it as painlessly as possible. Not sure how to proceed. (It is a blizzard in there, sorry.)
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 11:19 PM on May 17, 2016 (41 comments)

Sticky Wicket

You are close friends with a couple (Tom and Tina). Tina shares the news with you that she and Tom broke up two weeks ago, they are both devastated and not ready to tell the larger friend group, and they have gone no-contact. Do you reach out to Tom, and if so, how and when?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 7:10 AM on May 17, 2016 (18 comments)

How do I actually enjoy talking to people?

When I have to talk with other people I feel exhausted. I need to improve my social skills one step at the time.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 7:10 AM on May 17, 2016 (15 comments)

pen & PAPER

Recommend me a board/tabletop game involving paper to give to my spouse for our first wedding anniversary.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 8:23 PM on May 16, 2016 (17 comments)

How to hire ethnically diverse employees?

Small firm looking for salespeople-- how can I get a more diverse group of candidates?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 5:30 PM on May 16, 2016 (16 comments)

Trouble talking about myself

I'm a shy person and it seems like I will always be this way. As I've grown older (I'm in my late 20s) I've learned to cope with my personality quirks and to modify certain negative aspects of my social self, but overall I think that socializing and entering new situations will always be a little bit tough for me. But I still would like to challenge my character and learn to open up more.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 5:04 PM on May 16, 2016 (4 comments)

Suddenly long distance, suddenly panicked

Our relationship is really great by any measure and makes me very happy... but now we're apart for the summer, and I'm stuck in obsessive anxiety about my feelings. Help!
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 7:10 AM on May 16, 2016 (6 comments)

Bipolar Triggers - Person to Person

I've been diagnosed bipolar for around 15 years now. I've been relatively stable on medication for the last 5 or so years, I deal with some depressive episodes but I haven't gone into a hypo-manic or mixed state in quite a while, but upon visiting a college friend dealing with Bipolar/Schizoaffective recently I found myself losing my mind in a mix of hypomanic glory and mixed state despair. Do you trigger off of other people? More details past the break.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 7:10 AM on May 16, 2016 (6 comments)

I love my husband…but I don’t want to sleep with him. Does it matter?

Until I slept with someone else, I didn't realise what I was missing. But I can't break up our lives on a whim. I don't know what to do.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 7:10 AM on May 16, 2016 (38 comments)

Benefits to formal diagnosis of dyslexia as an adult?

I think my boyfriend might be dyslexic and I'm debating how much to bug him about getting it checked out. But how would you even treat dyslexia in a 30-year old, and is there any benefit to getting a formal evaluation and/or diagnosis as an adult?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 5:41 PM on May 15, 2016 (9 comments)

Paypal advice for setting up account w/country complications

Is there any problem setting up a Paypal account when you live in one country, but the credit card you want to link is from another country? In my case, I live in [European Country] and my credit card is from my bank in the US, my native country. If you've done this in the last couple of years*, can you help advise me?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 11:49 PM on May 14, 2016 (6 comments)

When Judas repents: Forgive or tell her to f*** off?

Is forgiving someone who has hurt you before and believing them when they say they won't again just naive wishful thinking? Or is it a virtue of the brave and the only path to maturity? The rest of the drama inside.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 11:49 PM on May 14, 2016 (34 comments)

How do people overlook physical unattractiveness with romance and sex?

I do not understand how physical unattractiveness can be overlooked by people when they meet a stranger and consider them for a romantic or sexual partner. I apply this more to myself than to others. I know this is not a good viewpoint. I need help from people who see this right, as adults do.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 11:48 PM on May 14, 2016 (41 comments)

Can you go to prison just to 'keep your meat alive' to save the galaxy?

I'm wondering, for a story idea--what does the average American Joe need to do, to be kept alive at the effort and expense of someone else, ie "THE MAN", while he battles the Reptiloids in the Dream Realms?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 6:57 AM on May 14, 2016 (34 comments)

How to hit the reset button on our sex life and libidos?

Our sex life has been lackluster for a long time and I want to change that, but there's a long and complicated history.. Wall of text inside.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 6:57 AM on May 14, 2016 (33 comments)

Can I skip getting my period for a month?

My husband and I are going on a week-long milestone anniversary trip, and wouldn't you know it, I'm going to get my period that week. For obvious reasons, I'd prefer that not to happen. Can I game my birth control pills so that it doesn't?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 6:57 AM on May 14, 2016 (25 comments)

It's not you, it's them.

My Ex has just dropped a bit of a bombshell and I need advice on how to minimise any impact on my 12yo daughter.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 9:16 PM on May 13, 2016 (40 comments)

Coping strategies to reduce/eliminate negative thoughts about my boss

I need help to stop hating my boss. I don't think that my boss is a bad person. I do think they are a terrible leader and that their actions are directly impeding both my ability to be effective in my role and to advance my career along the path I have been (wildly successfully) on. I also think that they, consciously or subconsciously, are working to sabotage me, or at the least smother me with power-plays and microaggressions to "keep me in my place" and under their control.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 9:15 PM on May 13, 2016 (11 comments)

YANM Employment Lawyer, 3 parter

So, I got royally screwed over. State: California. After a tenuous start with a new employer, it was clear my boss wasn't going to work with me to ensure my success on the team, so I started looking around. Found a new job, great fit, great company. Applied, interviewed, and was given an offer. Signed the offer, resigned (verbally) from the current job.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 7:26 AM on May 13, 2016 (9 comments)

Need a divorce lawyer in Toronto and have no idea where to start

I'm separating from my common-in-law partner and need to find a divorce/separation lawyer who can help me get a separation agreement crafted and signed. I have only ever used a lawyer twice - when I bought & sold my house, and when I wrote my will. I have no idea where to look or what I should be looking for. Help!
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 9:45 AM on May 12, 2016 (8 comments)

How to deal with professional and private jealousy?

I'm struggling with recurring jealousy. I wake up anxious, dwelling in it for a while before I leave the bed. Saps me of my energy. I see acquaintances and friends around me climbing great heights, winning awards, traveling the world, and I feel I am trapped and have lost and havent accomplished anything and I won't amount to much and I'm already 33. This has been happening for quite a few years now, this intense burning in the pit of my stomach, and subsequent depression. Is there a way without medicating myself that I can deal with this? How to deal with professional jealousy? Private jealousy?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 5:09 AM on May 11, 2016 (23 comments)

How to ask out my TA? … when we’ve already made out?

How to ask out my TA? … when we’ve already made out? My judgment may be slightly clouded by, um, hormones.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 7:28 PM on May 10, 2016 (14 comments)

Asking for references from coworkers at your current job

Pretty much everyone I've worked with closely I still work with at my current employer. How I do I navigate the process of asking for references when looking for a new job?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 9:32 AM on May 10, 2016 (8 comments)

Yet another "Do I want this job?" question

I've been at my current employer for about three years. I'm thinking of making a career move, so that I focus more on, let's say, tennis policy analysis. I've found a job that looks promising, but I'm having a hard time telling if it's the right next step for me.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 6:22 AM on May 10, 2016 (10 comments)

I want to make my wife feel better somehow

My wife's fairly down right now. How can I perk her up?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 6:22 AM on May 10, 2016 (22 comments)

Neighbor wants to replace wall separating our gardens, what do I do?

My NYC townhouse has a garden in the back. The garden has a wall around it, which has been there for decades. Two nearby trees has caused it to bow out of alignment toward my neighbor's garden, though not dramatically so. My neighbor claims in a letter to me that the wall will one day collapse into her garden, and wants us to share the cost of replacing the wall, before that happens, with a fence. She also said that if I don't agree to do this, I better make sure that my insurance covers the possible damage to her property that a collapse could cause. I think my neighbor (who is wealthy) just wants a new fence for aesthetic reasons so it matches other fencing on her property, and that the wall is fine -- and I have some questions for the hive-mind...
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 6:22 AM on May 10, 2016 (7 comments)

ADHD despite great working memory and processing speed?

What could cause lifelong symptoms of inattentive ADHD in someone whose working memory and processing speed appear to be functioning spectacularly well? My cognitive assessment results have me baffled.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 8:30 PM on May 9, 2016 (15 comments)

How to handle insane financial/school situation

I go to a good school on a merit scholarship, but I'm massively in debt because of past mistakes and everything depends on my doing well now. I'm fighting mental health problems, and if my GPA gets below 3.5, I stand to lose everything.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 7:29 AM on May 9, 2016 (15 comments)

Rebuilding trust in my relationship

How can I stop beating myself up for experiencing insecurity?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 2:06 AM on May 9, 2016 (12 comments)

How to tell a 6yr old child that Mom and Dad are splitting up?

I'm looking for recommendations about what and how to explain to our 6-year old daughter that Dad (me) has moved out and won't be living at home for an extended period (very likely a few months, at least). It's entirely unclear whether I'll be moving back home ever. I'll be with my daughter tomorrow and her mom and I have both agreed that we need to start explaining this to her, and Mom has asked that the conversation happen tomorrow. So I'm trying to get prepared for that - both trying to figure out what to say (or what not to say), and to anticipate what questions my daughter might have.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 4:19 PM on May 8, 2016 (24 comments)

Marital Counselors In or Within Driving Distance of Steuben County, IN?

I am looking for recommendations for marital counseling therapists in the Steuben County, Indiana area, or in towns within a reasonable drive from there (Elkhart, Coldwater, etc.). Experience with senior citizen couples a plus. Sliding scale also a plus.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 5:06 AM on May 8, 2016 (1 comment)

How to listen without offering solutions?

I'm in a relationship for the first time in a few years. When my girlfriend comes to me with problems or things that are bothering her, I'm intellectually aware that she's not looking for solutions or fixes unless she asks, she's looking for understanding and empathy. However, I'm just not practiced providing that kind of emotional support and often find myself at a loss for words. How do I do it?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 1:38 PM on May 7, 2016 (35 comments)

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