It would probably be best if he asked his doctor these questions, as no one here knows the extent of his injury.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 6:33 PM on August 7, 2008

"Change jobs if you don't like it" are not solutions.

Honestly, having been in your position as a designer, it certainly is a solution and the only regret was that it hadn't been done sooner.

But in the interest of my own (and the company's) success, and my sanity

Is this really a problem or is it something bothers you personally? Is the company actually losing money or... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 11:39 AM on August 7, 2008

What OS are you using?
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 2:07 PM on August 6, 2008

Take a look at Freemind, it might work for you.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 7:31 PM on August 2, 2008

I really take issue about being too curt. I don't understand what's bad about giving short and straightforward answers to questions.

I have this problem also. What seems to be the case is that people like to talk and be talked to. Just giving a short answer isn't enough, talking is like apes grooming each other, it's just soothing to many people. So learning to prattle on about something could be useful skill to develop.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 6:05 PM on August 1, 2008

We want to know how to help James make the transition from straight to gay.

Just be his friend. Whatever else happens or doesn't happen, that's all that really matters.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 1:28 PM on August 1, 2008

In short, I need the low-down of starting a meta site devoted to one subject and how to make it a phenomenal success.

First thing you need to do is define what you mean by success. Does it mean making ton of money? Does it mean having a warm feeling inside you? This is critical, because if you get into this thinking X, when you really want Y, well, you've just wanted time and potentially money.


The second thing... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 7:46 AM on July 30, 2008

No, we can't do that on AskMeFi.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 4:06 PM on July 30, 2008

"I love you" is girl code for "I want to have your babies."

Bullshit. That's the most retarded thing I've heard all week and yes, I've read what Orson Scott Card has to say about gay marriage.

Also what have you said to lead up to it.

Ok, there was this girl that I loved like you love your SO. All very new feelings for me yet she was quite skittish about... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 6:39 AM on July 30, 2008

If I could tell any parent of a teen anything it would be to KNOW YOUR KIDS' FRIENDS.

I would agree. My kids friends are awesome so when they're doing stuff like this I'm not too worried. and yeah, worry less about how she looks and more about how she acts.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 1:37 PM on July 29, 2008

Is Jessica having money problems or some other problems? If so, try dealing with those either directly or indirectly. She may be feeling as if the world is against and she has to fight for every scrap she can get, no matter who it's from. If that's the case and you guys are willing to go this route, try to help her in some form or fashion. Don't specifically ask for the dress or other stuff back, just let it go for now and focus on letting her know she's not alone and doesn't have to fight so... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 11:13 AM on July 27, 2008

he's terrified of change

He loves adventures and trying new things.

he likes routine a lot

These descriptions don't jive for one person. Is the hypochondriac in you peeking out? 'Cause he sounds cool with a few quirks i.e. human and I'm wondering if you're projecting your own fears onto him.

Have you discussed your fears with him? I realize it's scary, but you guys need to talk about this before you get married.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 5:33 AM on July 27, 2008

What moxiedoll said.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 8:04 PM on July 26, 2008

Expand your idea of what a relationship is and is not, because it's not that you don't want a relationship, you just want a low maintenance one with no strings attached. That should be a easy thing to arrange as long as you're upfront about you want and are willing to end the relationship should it go further.

On preview: What orange swan said.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 6:31 PM on July 26, 2008

Does he view the way he lives as a problem? If the answer is yes, then you can help him learn how to handle money, if you're so inclined. If the answer is no, then you're going to be settling and unhappy in the relationship.

Speaking as an outside observer, who has only heard your side of the story and has no stake in the outcome, you clearly know what you don't want and this guy, despite whatever good qualities he has, is giving you way too much of what you don't want.... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 7:03 PM on July 23, 2008

Seriously, though... does anyone else go through this?

Yes and I decided 'fuck it', too much energy was being spent on finding a hiding place, changing names, etc, etc. Instead of worrying about whether someone will find out your deep, dark secrets and hurt you with them, accept that they will and that you can survive it. Because you can.

Only be being completely vulnerable can you be strong.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 6:57 PM on July 22, 2008

You're not getting what you need from your relationship. That has to be fixed, otherwise it's going to fester and poison it. And speaking as a guy who is sounds similar to your SO, he needs to work his issues out before he loses you.

Keep in mind that it's possible that you and he might not notice when he's lost you until after the fact. Often this occurs when someone similar to the SO turns up, but with none of the SO's issues, though of course they have different ones.... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 10:22 AM on July 22, 2008

The introvert article isn't for the "I love you" problem, but for the OP to have better general understanding of her SO. It's really quite ok for him to need space at times and it's really no big deal. Some people are just built like that and that quality alone doesn't make them any better or any worse than anyone else. It just makes them different.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 3:13 PM on July 22, 2008

Any suggestions on how to keep this from being a repeated topic of conversation and stress?

Ask him to stop talking about it. Ya'll have talked about it, everyone knows where everyone stands and nothing is going to change.

But he can't stop talkin' about it, you know why? Because he doesn't like dogs and finds their presence annoying. If you constantly had to be around something that annoyed the shit outta you in order to be... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 1:03 PM on July 22, 2008

he hasn't even SEEN my dog in months, I've only been going to his place. Yet still talks about society judging him for not liking dogs and how he just doesn't get it.

i.e. he really doesn't like dogs and isn't going to get over it.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 1:35 PM on July 22, 2008

I used my 80gig not only carry my complete music collection with me, but as a reason to get more music. It also served as a portable hard drive and backup of important files, such as my entire iPhoto collection

Can't remember where I read it, but I think the hard drive speed is too slow to run and OS.

Mostly though, it was nice to have the option to grab pretty much anything from anywhere. Were I to get another one, I'd seriously consider getting... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 1:53 PM on July 18, 2008

Have gotten more ideas and the realization that some of those ideas should not be made reality. Also, a fuller appreciation of the creativity and depravity that humans are capable of.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 6:02 AM on July 18, 2008

Keep in mind, you can help her, but you can't fix her. As her SO, your job is to provide love, comfort, support, laughs and sex. Listen to her and hold her and make her laugh and you'll be fine.

In short, continue what you're doing and let her work out her issues.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 7:48 PM on July 17, 2008

But would you be able to ask for a hundred of said burritos and refuse to pay more than 99 cents because they were advertised as less than a penny?

Yes you could ask for a hundred of said burritos and refuse to pay more than 99 cents, but at the very least you'd be dealing with a cop at the end of shift who is getting pissed that you're actions are 'causing him to be late for his kid's game/date with SO/some fucking sleep and he will take it out on... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 4:55 PM on July 17, 2008

I found (married now), that's it best to express interest by saying "Hey, I'm interested in being more than friends with you, would you like to go out on a date with me?" Depending on the situation, vary the wording, but for god sakes, make it crystal clear that you eventually want to snuggle up to these person and let them decide if they like that idea.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 2:24 PM on July 17, 2008

I can see that the marriage ending was a very good thing, and I feel pretty okay about that.

Go with that. While the marriage officially ended a relatively short time ago, it's entirely possible (and seems likely) that you recognized its death a while ago and came to terms with that.

Relax, take it slow, have fun. But don't be surprised if some unresolved feelings or conflicts come up, it's natural.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 9:01 AM on July 16, 2008

But last night he said that he'd been thinking about that ever since

Important point: He never talked to you about this. He's unilaterally made this decision and dropped this bombshell on you despite his feelings of love. Ask yourself this: Do you really want to have to convince him or save him when, on the one hand he's worried he doesn't have much time left and on the other hand acting like a selfish, scared prick?
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 11:10 AM on July 14, 2008

I'm just so afraid he's translating "I've already had two strikes" into "therefore I must be a piss-poor batter and it's not even worth trying to swing at this ball here in the strike zone".

If so, that is his choice. Sure, talk to him and try to work things out, but don't try to change his mind because you feel he just isn't seeing things right. He's made a choice, without consulting you and perhaps that's all you need to know.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 3:04 PM on July 14, 2008

He even gave a chuckle as he was getting ready to leave and said, "who knows, you may still win after all."

Stop playing games and/or being a spectator in his games and move on with your life.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 7:13 AM on July 15, 2008

Could you define what you mean by domestic abuser? 'cause the US President sounds like he fits that description and I'm not sure that's what you mean.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 9:20 AM on July 14, 2008

the reason i was trying to take it into photoshop was because i still wanted to do some effects to the rasters after the layout is done

If you're using linked files in Illustrator, just do the effects on raster stuff in PSD and when you switch back to Illustrator, the new rasters will be imported. Doing all of this in PSD sounds painful and unnecessary.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 9:13 PM on July 12, 2008

Speaking as a guy, just smile and say thank you if you appreciate the compliment. Most of are hardwired for the visual, so a pretty woman smiling and genuinely saying "thank you" makes our day. If the situation is right, feel free to flirt ("Thanks, sexy" or "Mmm, you're looking pretty good yourself")

Tit for tat compliments sounds false though.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 3:33 AM on July 10, 2008

Well, why do you want to be part of this group? In what way will being part of it help you grow artistically?

How do you want to grow artistically? That answer goes with the number 2 question.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 9:05 AM on July 9, 2008

As an Agnostic living on the Georgia coast, all I can say is that it's their problem, not yours. Don't be confrontational, be generally nice and over time, you'll find that coworkers will came around and just regard you as "the crazy one who doesn't go to church."

Really, it's not your problem. Let it go, you'll just cause yourself no idea of worry if you dwell on it. Have fascinating conversations about religion when you come across someone who is curious and... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 4:42 PM on July 8, 2008 marked best answer

Every time, he will tattle to my parents about the nature of our conversations; this time, I'm very afraid that it will result in another estrangement period

Based on this, I'm guessing that this isn't so much about telling the Rev to fuck off, but being able to tell him to fuck off in a nice way, so it doesn't cause estrangement from your parents. That may not be possible. More than likely, your parents are asking him to have a word with you or he's... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 6:30 PM on July 7, 2008

Your house is similar to ours, 'cept ours was built in the 20th century (1905).

How many BTUs are the A/C units? Are you using window fans for cross circulation? Those, with the ceiling fans, keep our living and dining room nice, while the A/C units control the bedrooms, which are important being able to sleep in the heat. Note that we use two window fans a room, one to draw air to the outside, the other to pull in air from the outside. This creates a nice, gentle... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 5:37 AM on July 6, 2008

Also, Consumer Reports has a nice calculator for figuring out what size window units to buy. It's detailed and involves some measuring on your part, but it worked out well for us
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 12:02 PM on July 6, 2008

In any case, the future right now looks very, very bleak to me and I feel like my thoughts about the future are unhealthy.

Perhaps it's time to go back into therapy.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 6:22 AM on July 5, 2008

makes me wonder if there is a cure for the suffering side of neglected relationships.

Decide what's important in a relationship and then ask for it. If you don't get what asked for, then you need to figure out if the relationship should continue. It's nice that's he great and all, but if you can't experience his greatness, then that really isn't doing you much good is it?
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 12:30 AM on July 4, 2008

What is the best way to communicate with my parent regarding my wishes for an upcoming visit from the girlfriend?

Like they did, directly and honestly, like an adult. They've already brought up the situation and expressed their wishes. You pretended not to hear or put it off to a later date. That's not adult behavior and they're not stupid, they know exactly where you stand on this by now.

Sit'em down and bring it up again.... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 7:19 PM on July 1, 2008

What am I doing wrong, how am I wrong?

Three possibilities:

1. You don't love yourself and you're sabotaging chances at relationships because of it. Seriously, you've met almost 50 women in the past 2 years and you've managed to stay attracted to none of them? That's crazy.
Why don't you love yourself? I don't know, nobody here does. For the answers, you need some therapy*.

2. You have... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 4:46 PM on July 1, 2008

Ok, OS X is a no go, but a Blue and White G3 (the last Mac computer with and ADB ) should work, as long it starts up from System 9.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 11:16 AM on July 1, 2008

Do I fix it myself under her nose and "surprise" her with a functioning computer?

Yeah, go ahead, you have the best intentions, right? Just don't be surprised if she isn't happy that you went against her clearly expressed wishes.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 9:19 PM on June 30, 2008

It's time for me to bring some of these babies to life for the web.

Have you asked the question of why you need to do this? There are plenty of non animated comics on the web and they do just fine.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 6:31 AM on June 30, 2008

Do iPhone's have sim cards? When my Sony Ericsson phone died, I got an LG as a replacement, 'cause I wanted to wait and see the new iPhones and maybe buy one. But i hated that phone and got a Sony Ericcson z2520, swapped sim cards and was up and running in 30 seconds. Why the z2520a? It syncs, via Bluetooth, with my Mac address book and calendar and cost all of $30. It does not have an internet browser though, which is fine by me.

Also, can Outlook sync with Backpack? Me... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 6:50 PM on June 29, 2008

How can I make small talk and smile and endure, knowing how large a contribution she made to the heartbreak in my life of late?

Where I in this situation, I would not make small talk or attempt to keep things quiet. I would be honest with my anger and hatred of this other person. I would either state this, matter of factly ("I'm not talking to him, because he fucked the love of my life when we were having problems. So how's your life been going?... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 6:35 PM on June 29, 2008

The only problem they seem to have with him is his girlfriend. She's sweet but very possessive too.

If the GF is being possessive, then it's ok for the family not to like her.

As to the fight, you don't say why he was grounded or describe the situation leading up to it, so it's hard to really offer an opinion. Add in the fact it is, for Metafilter, a foreign culture and little understanding of family dynamics and you've got... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 2:41 AM on June 29, 2008

This is an excellent way to start a conversation with attractive co-workers. It's light, but could get deep and has plenty of potential for flirting.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 8:52 PM on June 28, 2008

What accounts for the connection?

They're like you. Rather than having to translate your thought into speech, they understand your thought process 'cause they think in a similar way. So it's no longer just you in your head, you've got a playmate.

Of course, other people can understand you, but the key difference is that they have to make an effort. These 'likeyous' instinctively understand you and validate your view of the world or thoughts, so they seem more real.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 8:38 PM on June 28, 2008

Please help me lay down the Democratic smackdown upon my fact-lacking Republican friends.

"I like my country and I always loved the potential of the American dream. But things seem fucked up right now. What do you think we can do, together, despite our differences, to make this country better?"
posted to Ask Metafilter by Brandon Blatcher at 5:17 PM on June 28, 2008