For me, getting poked in the cervix rarely hurts, but it's also rarely pleasant. I'd suspect that the searing pain may be related to your being tense/not quite relaxed enough. It takes a lot of practice for sex to be truly amazing, as well as a lot of comfort with your body. If you're not quite comfortable, or not quite aroused enough, your vaginal canal may not have enough elasticity for sex to be good (which in turn may mean that you stay unaroused), and no amount of lube... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 9:55 PM on July 2, 2008

If you're on a budget, I'd also highly recommend thrift stores--even if you've got an expensive tailored bra, you'll still benefit. They'll give you time to experiment with clothing inexpensively while you're still working out your style, for one.
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 7:55 PM on June 25, 2008

For what it's worth, I met my partner in February 2005, knowing I'd be leaving town in mid-May and then starting grad school somewhere else that autumn. I thought he was just a really fantastic quick fling, and approached our relationship with that emotional perspective. After a few months, he told me he'd been thinking of moving to the city I was headed to for graduate school. I was incredibly freaked out about what his moving with me (and living with me until he found his own place)... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 1:09 PM on June 21, 2008

I had this problem and I found that if you pee within five/ten minutes after sex, the odds of getting an infection go way down.

Peeing washes bacteria from the urethra, lowering your chances of a UTI. It won't have anything to do with a yeast infection.

You might try using non-spermicidal condoms (and extra water-based lube if you need it).
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 12:22 PM on June 21, 2008

Menstrual extraction seems to be a relic of '70s separatist movements and I wish it'd make a comeback. You may be able to find a midwife who's sympathetic and will perform extractions for you. I remember googling menstrual extraction a few months ago and being able to find very little current, non-theoretical information.

Are you anemic? Anemia + menstruation is a vicious cycle: the more you bleed, the more you lose iron, which (for some reason) causes you to bleed even... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 12:44 PM on June 12, 2008

There were several bathhouse-specific articles in Nobody Passes: Rejecting the Rules of Gender & Conformity, edited by Mattilda Bernstein Sycamore. The anthology is a mix of fairly academic articles and personal essay, and I don't remember where some/any/all of the bathhouse articles fell on that spectrum.
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 12:33 PM on June 12, 2008

I'd recommend dropping off the face of the earth for more than just eight months in Guatemala. If you head straight to a PhD program after you finish your BA, unless you're getting a doctorate for the fun of it, you'll have to jump straight into the beginnings of a career post-PhD. Take some time off, explore the world. I have no doubt that the three years I spent teaching computer literacy classes at an inner city library, then ESL in Japan, then traveling overland from Beijing to France helped... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 10:08 AM on May 8, 2008

Start with Duotrope's Digest, a great online database of print & electronic journals, searchable by genre & paying/non-paying markets. Or go sit in a bookstore with a good magazine selection and read for a couple hours. Some people like the book Writer's Market, which lists thousands of magazines by genre in succinct little paragraphs; I don't because there's no sense in carpet bombing magazines with writing that may not be at all relevant to their aesthetic or... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 9:41 PM on May 5, 2008

Stop washing, though if it's short it'll probably just become a little straighter and less silky. Washing with a coarser shampoo (i.e. Dr Bronners, or a bar of soap) and adding wax/oil/lotion to your hair might help, too.
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 1:12 PM on May 1, 2008

You might start by rolling up your long-sleeved shirts on warm days--see how that's received. That way, you can "break the news" of your tattoos gradually.
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 11:33 AM on May 1, 2008

Go in person to ask at their office hours, dress casually but neatly, and be generally pleasant. Be prepared to remind them who you are. If you have a curriculum vitae or if you've done any academic work relevant to their discipline (or won any departmental prizes), tell them about it. Bring samples if you can.

As tiamat says, do all the work for them that you can. If there's a form, have it already filled out to give to them when you stop by their office for the first... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 12:41 AM on May 1, 2008

I know in Texas it's legal (even advised) to park on the sidewalk. That said, I know someone whose bike was impounded for "illegally" parking on the sidewalk here--so expect people, even the people who issue parking tickets, not to know. If your bike gets impounded, you still have to waste a day going to get it and wrangling out of a wrongfully-given ticket.
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 8:45 PM on April 27, 2008

To Grand Cayman they do!
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 7:03 PM on April 23, 2008

I have a quite grotesque necklace made of my wisdom teeth, plus one found tooth which probably belonged to a dog. Here's a self-link. It gets a lot of comments.
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 8:17 AM on April 23, 2008

Whoa--the skytrain tunnels sound amazing. I imagine it's trespassing to explore them, huh? (My friends are generally law-abiding, slightly cautious sorts.)

Yohan sounds amazing--it may work! They've lived in Japan and spent time in Korea and China, though, so it may not be quite mystery-filled for them!
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 11:10 PM on April 22, 2008

Jeff, you probably already know about the informal private sort-of-taxi system that exists in Russia and quite a few eastern European countries: because owning a car is expensive, people regularly pick up 'hitchhikers' who pay a small set amount per kilometer. I'm sure there's more about this online--European hitchhiking listservs and message boards talk about it occasionally. I can rustle up more info if you'd like.
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 10:00 PM on April 22, 2008

I usually carry a notebook (larger moleskine) and a very fine-tipped pen. Also chapstick. Sometimes a book if I think I'll have to wait around for something. Wallet & keys & cellphone go in my pockets. I used to carry a maglite & pepper spray on my keychain, but lately it's just been keys & a bottle opener.

When I'm being ultra-prepared I carry my Diva Cup, a jacket for cool weather/air conditioning, tea bags & sugar packets for making tea, a water... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 9:55 PM on April 22, 2008

Though your specific plan doesn't seem perfect, logistically speaking (what if she doesn't like the necklace, loses it, etc), the spirit of it is wonderful. SassHat's plan (& hopefully parmanparman's) seems like a surer thing. I for one (as a woman, but not the marryin' type) find this idea really exciting.
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 10:34 PM on April 15, 2008

If you haven't already found the website bigdaikon.com, check it out. The message boards can be an incredible resource (they're full of gaijin who've analyzed the application process inside out, as well as people who've lived/worked extensively in Japan). You'll also run into more creepy misogynistic & racist trolls than you'd ever imagined could congregate in one place without hitting critical mass. Pick your battles very carefully.
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 10:09 PM on April 9, 2008

FYI, I was waitlisted for JET and made it off the list in June, I think. I'd requested placement in one of two specific towns, one in eastern Shizuoka-ken, the other in western Aichi-ken. I was placed right in between them, just about equidistant...
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 10:14 PM on April 9, 2008

Does your friend know someone else in the dorms (or on-campus suites) who'd let you crash there? You might try to find a spare room/couch on couchsurfing.com or hospitalityclub.org (I've had great experiences with guests & hosts from both sites, though your chances for privacy vary). Non-chain motels will often allow you to bargain a discount if you do it cheerfully and respectfully (even asking "do you have any discounts?" with a big smile can produce good results).... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 10:41 PM on March 16, 2008

I was able to petition for in-state residency in Pennsylvania after living there only several months, by writing a letter to the dean of the school discussing that my parents didn't support me (true), that I intended to stay in Pennsylvania because, among other reasons, the job market in my out-of-state hometown was pretty abysmal and I couldn't count on supporting myself if I went back (true), and saying that I was already invested in the city my school was in & loved it & planned on... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 3:50 PM on March 13, 2008

ob, that is actually untrue. Many, many MFA programs in writing (and in other arts, too, as well as MA programs) offer good-to-generous funding. If you're a good enough writer to get into Columbia, you're good enough to get into Michigan, UVA, the Michener Center, Iowa, and many other programs that fully fund all accepted students via TAships. The benefit of Columbia is proximity to NYC, agents, and networking. If you're not already really good--good enough to benefit from... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 3:34 PM on March 13, 2008

Uh oh--I should've previewed. The MFA-specific message boards I mentioned above are here.
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 3:38 PM on March 13, 2008

Props to ottereroticist for 'getting it' re: cultural &/or political identity!

Funny--as a [queer-identified, but functionally hetero of late] woman, I've long wished it wasn't so hard to date gay men!
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 11:58 PM on March 11, 2008

If you're looking for writing-specific environments, you might check out the Alliance of Artists Communities for writers' retreats. Keep in mind these are different than residencies (which tend to be free/stipended & which you have to apply for far in advance), and you may have to sift through both.
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 10:39 AM on February 26, 2008

I find it completely strange that others see tallying up spending on a night out as insensitive. This is like viewing a conversation re: having better sex as a personal affront. If something like spending is a touchy subject so early in the relationship--before finances become entwined--just imagine what a morass it'll be further on.

Or, I wonder if people would've taken this differently if the poster had been female, and mentioned her boyfriend being upset re: her... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 5:48 PM on February 23, 2008

Pittsburgh has the Hill District ("the Hill"), though depending on who you are and where you like to live, you might consider Homewood, a lot of the North Side, Lincoln-Larrimer, Garfield, and East Liberty dangerous.

Austin has "the East Side," which is how people commonly refer to the huge multi-neighborhood area between the river on the south, Manor on the north, I-35 on the west, and Airport (and beyond) on the east. Most people who don't live... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 7:33 AM on February 15, 2008

Ha--sorry for the Pittsburgh duplicates. It's kind of funny though that all our bad neighborhoods have very little overlap!
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 7:38 AM on February 15, 2008

Pittsburgh is probably my favorite city in the whole world: winding streets, green space everywhere, great old architecture (with incredible stories behind it), and incredible-yet-accessible arts community (which means lots of funding for young people to start galleries, literary journals, performance series, public art projects). Housing is incredibly cheap and plentiful, even if you'd like to live in a "good"/"family friendly" neighborhood. The city's layers of cultural... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 10:26 PM on February 12, 2008

Tomble, in Japan having a "cat's tongue" means you have an aversion to hot foods.

Is "cat mouth"/"two-ply paper mouth" the same as "pickle mouth"? When I think of (or anticipate eating) pickles or other highly acidic foods, my mouth waters in a kind of shivery way...
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 5:22 PM on January 13, 2008

Medical studies and trolling Craigslist. This means you'll have to help balding middle aged dudes clean out their storage lockers filled with female wrestler porn, but it'll get you cash at the end of the day.
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 3:24 PM on January 13, 2008

I know this isn't exactly what you're looking for, advice-wise, but why not try to find people who're going to Kenya? Someone might be willing to try tracking one down if you give them hints on how. I sure would if I was making a short trip and didn't have to lug it around for weeks.
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 3:19 PM on January 13, 2008

This isn't the best article out there, but John Freyer of All My Life For Sale might serve as a good role model. :)
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 8:59 PM on December 26, 2007

Pasta's incredibly easy (if time consuming) to make. I'm of the opinion that pasta machines are more trouble and expense than they're worth. Instead, use a cutting board (or clean, floured table), a rolling pin, and a knife with a thin blade. You can find plenty of recipes online--stick with the most basic ones for now--oil, water, and flour, maybe an egg. Once you've got workable dough (kneaded once, refrigerated, kneaded again), roll it out as thin as you can. Then cut it into thin strips. At... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 12:16 AM on December 26, 2007

Oh heck--should've previewed! To be fair, a good rolling pin (borrowed or bought cheaply at Ross', etc) will make the process much easier than a wine bottle. :)

My primary pasta sauce ingredients are garlic, butter, and either olives+feta+mushrooms, or spinach+plain yogurt+cumin. The latter is much more filling and nutritious. Saute. Add yogurt last (if you're adding it at all), still cold. The sauted spinach will warm it up without causing it to clot like sauteing it will.
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 12:24 AM on December 26, 2007

Why do you ask? (I've spent the afternoon collaboratively writing an unproducible play with several friends. I'd like to nominate it, but it isn't even properly formatted yet, much less 'known'!)
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 10:21 PM on December 25, 2007

I've made elaborate treasure hunts before--once for a co-worker I'd never even spoken to (a friend of a friend). I would slip him a note that would lead him to the cut-out silhouette of a chicken on top of the break room coke machine, which contained a riddle pointing him to a cootie catcher taped beneath the paper towel dispenser in a bathroom, which led to a scytale cipher and also a small dowel (pencil) for deciphering, which led eventually to a little book I'd made. Substitute book for note,... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 5:26 PM on December 25, 2007

I really like Burt's Bees "baby bee buttermilk lotion." It's 98% natural ingredients, plus vitamin E, and smells nice but not too strong. About $8 in the US, and now probably available nearly everywhere. I've used it (on myself) for years.

I'm a big fan of natural body products, partially because I'm suspicious of lotions which use petroleum (i.e. aren't actually moisturizing, just feel good), but also because chemicals are absorbed directly through the skin... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 3:53 PM on December 19, 2007

1. Have you thought about posting very publicly on your blog about it, including everything you know about him?

2. DO NOT delete his messages unread or bounce them back. Set up a false system to make it look like this has been done, and maybe don't read the messages, but you should archive them somewhere (redirect anything from his address to a hard-to-get-to folder, or a different email account, so that you won't have to read them, but you have them on record as 'proof.... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 2:06 PM on December 2, 2007

I've been fascinated with the idea of menstrual extraction since I read about it--long ago (circa age 15!) in some hilariously charming 1970s lesbian feminist publication. The procedure is basically the suction portion of an abortion, i.e. not something one engages in casually. But the whole process brings up an interesting note about women's discomfort with our bodies and our own sexualities: most of us (myself included) wouldn't dream of putting our medical care in "unqualified"... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 10:27 PM on November 29, 2007

When I first started having sex with men, I got pregnancy panic at least once every cycle. The panic is normal, and so is the occasional strange body-response. I've been having sex for over a decade now (yay!) and still get the irrational panics every once in a while, even when I know I've done everything right, even when I'm at a completely infertile part of my cycle, et cetera. Don't worry--just continue to be cautious, keep having good sex, and realize that nearly every woman has these... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 6:49 PM on November 29, 2007

Chat/qat, illegal in the US but legal and widely used by North African immigrants in the UK.
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 2:22 PM on November 27, 2007

The caveat with phenazophyridine/Uristat: it'll also turn your skin orange.
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 11:36 PM on November 25, 2007

To nth everyone else: there have been quite a few posts asking for advice for the newly sexually active, and learning more about your bodies and your relationship may be your/her best bet regarding solving vaginal pain.. Spend time together naked but not actively engaged in sexual activity, masturbate together and alone, get to know each other's bodies. In short, if she's never before inserted a tampon (or even a finger) in her own vagina, not even out of curiosity, it... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 10:40 PM on November 23, 2007

One thing you might want to consider regarding learning French is that, though it's very widely spoken, it's the language of a former colonial power, and you as a non-African (even if you're African American, you'll be seen as American first, and Black as a far second) may want to rigorously minimize being viewed as a do-gooder outsider who's come to provide yet another handout. This is obviously incredibly complex, and there are a million other cultural colonialism worries you'll have to take... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 7:51 PM on November 15, 2007

Keep in mind that Amtrak's ticket prices shoot up as fewer seats are available (I'm half-asleep; I think I mean "prices rise in inverse proportion to the number of available seats"). So whatever you ARE able to get will be crazy expensive. For a six hour trip, Greyhound or craigslisting a rideshare may be a better bet.
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 7:35 PM on November 15, 2007

Also, Greyhound is often on time, whereas Amtrak is rarely ever on time (partly their fault; partly because they share lease use of the freight lines as far as I understand, and thus freight trains take precedence). If I had to risk it with something for a short trip, rather than a small adventure (w/ sightseeing lounge, diner car, etc), I'd far, far rather go with Greyhound.
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 7:37 PM on November 15, 2007

If you consider shipping, friends have had good luck (and good prices) shipping via Amtrak. The trick is, you have to take it to the departure station, and pick it up on the other end.
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 3:21 PM on November 2, 2007

The fiction writers in my program are overwhelmed with wanting to be Cormac McCarthy, and with inventing appropriate blue collar pasts for themselves.

There's definitely not a central poet-model, though when I lived in Pittsburgh it seemed like everyone wrote in the plainfaced traditional narrative style of Lynn Emanuel.
posted to Ask Metafilter by soviet sleepover at 9:30 AM on October 31, 2007