There is lots of great advice here, so I'm not going to repeat it. Your post really touched me, though, and I just wanted to say something to you.

I really admire you for having the courage to leave that relationship. I think that shows that you are a strong woman, and that you have the strength to heal yourself.

I hope you stop feeling bad about posting this -- everyone responding is responding because they feel for you and want to offer you... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 6:17 PM on July 10, 2008

Thanks for the responses so far. :-)

With regards to just getting used to breathing through my nose -- I don't think that's possible. I usually breathe through my nose, but I have terrible allergies and while they are mostly under control, I don't always feel like I get enough air in through my nose when my allergies are bad and I'm all post-nasal-drippy and have weird shit going on in my sinuses.

Also...I know I haven't tried it for long, but... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 10:51 PM on July 6, 2008

There are a lot of great answers, thanks everyone. I know I had a lot of concerns wrapped up in my question.

I am not completely giving up on the CPAP...I am definitely going to try both the breathe right strips and turning off the ramping function, and maybe that will help.

To address some other concerns people mentioned:

- I already have a pretty effective routine for my allergies - saline nasal rinses at least once... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 6:06 PM on July 7, 2008

Also, my pressure varies (it's an auto CPAP) from 5-12.
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 6:09 PM on July 7, 2008

Does your cat actually try and attack strangers, or does she growl/hiss/bite when strangers approach her or come into her territory? The latter behavior is VERY unusual for a cat -- almost all cats who dislike strangers react by avoiding them, and will only act aggressive when cornered or approached. Does your cat have a safe place it can go and hide when company is over? Can you put her food/water/litterbox away from the areas where company will be hanging out?... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 10:38 AM on June 29, 2008

Whoops, in my first paragraph, I meant the former behavior is very unusual. It is not unusual for a cat to "attack" when it feels threatened with no escape. It is unusual for a cat to hunt out a person and attack them, unprovoked.
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 10:39 AM on June 29, 2008

Ok, well, I guess it's undetectable to most humans? My husband and I never had a problem with it, and it did seem to help our cats. So, as with anything YMMV, but if you don't have asthma (and my husband has asthma and never had a problem with it), I can't see how it could hurt.
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 10:55 AM on June 29, 2008

It would be weird for you to ask right now since you aren't even expecting. If you find that you are expecting and due to have a girl, then you could ask her. But I don't even think you have to. What, does she own the name?
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 10:42 AM on June 29, 2008

I know the immediate problem has been resolved, but if you aren't afraid of them, cats can often be great at keeping bugs like cockroaches out of your apartment. It might give you some peace of mind to have a ferocious furry little hunter who is on YOUR side, ready to munch any intruders to bits.
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 6:41 PM on June 24, 2008

I'd like to reiterate what saliva said. You need to separate your worries about being alone for the long term from your feelings from this girl. If things with this girl work out, that is no guarantee you won't eventually break up and be at square one. If things don't work out, that is no guarantee that you won't meet Miss Perfect a couple weeks later and get married and live happily ever after. It is irrational to think you can predict the future based on one event. So let yourself relax... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 8:27 PM on June 20, 2008

amro - Just to clarify, this is from me & my husband, so it's ~$100/plate.
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 8:01 PM on June 17, 2008

HotToddy - I like the idea, but it's impractical since I don't really have dog access.

I probably should have mentioned that I'm in NH and they're in NJ so it's not really easy for me to get down there.
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 8:06 PM on June 17, 2008

I'm late to this thread, but I just wanted to say that I'm so glad you got him help right away and he's doing alright!
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 3:54 PM on June 16, 2008

What about just going commando if you can't keep up with washing your underwear?
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 4:55 PM on June 12, 2008

Definitely go see a doctor.
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 6:45 PM on June 4, 2008

I think [NOT HERMITOSIS-IST]'s response is both honest and graceful, so if you must send a response, I think something along those lines would be best. That said, any response whatsoever may cause her to respond. It is very difficult for some people to let someone else have the last word. Maybe send the message and promptly add her e-mail address to your block list so you don't need to deal with any responses?
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 11:19 AM on May 21, 2008

I think it's perfectly normal. I've also been eating less, though plenty to fuel my body and keep me from being hungry. But I'd been in the habit of snacking constantly, hungry or not, before paying attention.

I find that sometimes I get hunger pangs, my stomach growls, and it feels like I am truly and legitimately hungry. I'm often surprised when 2 hours later when I have gotten distracted and gone and done something else, I'm not hungry anymore. Sometimes when I... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 9:45 AM on May 15, 2008

Give it to her on her birthday! Nothing makes an actual birthday more fun than getting to open your big present on the actual day! I almost always know what I'm getting from my husband, but I still love being forced to wait until the day of to open it and play with it.
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 8:13 AM on May 8, 2008

It's not a drug, but I have dealt with SEVERE social anxiety, and cannot recommend the Shyness & Social Anxiety Workbook enough. It has CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) exercises in it that made a world of difference to me.
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 7:00 AM on May 8, 2008

You have a choice -- resign yourself to a desperate struggle to achieve completely blind faith, or give yourself permission to feel doubt and curiosity. If God exists, he gave you the ability to question things for a reason, and NOT just to trick you into abandoning your faith so he can punish you.

Maybe you should give yourself permission to step back and think about the way you imagine God, and realize that what you've been taught your entire life is just the word of... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 6:47 AM on May 8, 2008

When someone says something, repeat it back to them and try to think of a question you are interested in about it. By making yourself repeat the response, and think about it enough to ask a question, you'll commit it to memory better.

You: "Where did you go on your vacation?"
Joe: "I went to Aruba!"
You: "Aruba? Where on Aruba did you stay?"
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 10:22 AM on May 7, 2008

Do I just let these friendships fade in the good night? I have communicated with both of them about my feelings, and I have just gotten stonewalled with no real resolution.

Honestly, I would. I don't believe in one-sided friendships, and neither of these people seem to be interested in doing their part.
#1 sounds self-absorbed, which is fine, but by being the one to initiate everything, you are enabling her and telling her that this is... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 10:19 AM on May 7, 2008

I would say that you should get your GED, since that would be a red flag for me. If you're confident you can get it no problem, just get it. Why wouldn't you?

That said, a lot of jobs don't require a college degree, and not just "skilled labor" type jobs or retail. In addition to sales, I know people who have gone into customer service, technical support, and even marketing roles without a completed degree.

It does, however, sound... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 8:49 AM on May 7, 2008

Um, I neglected in my BONUS ADVICE to say that the major corporation that hired us had a policy to pay in full for us to take coursework at the school of our choosing to obtain a degree that could be related to any career within the company. Advanced degrees, like a law degree or MBA required approval, but pretty much any bachelor's degree you could justify was fair game. Benefits like that are worth a LOT.
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 8:53 AM on May 7, 2008

I think it sounds like a lovely idea as a going away gift. As long as you don't overdo it (I mean, putting them in a simple, inexpensive album, nothing that looks expensive or that it took you dozens of hours to put together would be ideal), it doesn't seem creepy (that seems to be what you're worried about).

Also, it's probably nicer and will give you more peace of mind if you just give it to them right before they leave instead of just leaving it for them. This way... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 8:34 AM on May 7, 2008

Last year we bought a house in Nashua and did some house hunting in MA not too far from your target area. In my non-expert opinion, I don't see any harm in your strategy. Several of my friends have bought homes in the area this past year, none of us have paid the asking price. It's not like houses for sale are hard to come by right now -- if you're not in a mad rush to get one specific dream house, make the offer you're comfortable with. The worst that can happen is it won't be accepted,... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 7:32 AM on May 7, 2008

There really is no right or wrong here, as rmmcclay said, it's what you did and it's ok. I mean, maybe for some people it could provide extra closure, but in my experience, a viewing doesn't really provide much more closure than any other memorial service. This is no grave offense to your son, and if you are still looking for closure, I would be willing to bet that you would still be looking for closure if you had viewed the body.

It's just a shitty, hard, horrible... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 7:21 AM on May 7, 2008

I painted our bedroom Behr's Brown Teepee. It's not as dark a brown as I expected (I was expecting milk chocolate, but it's more like chocolate milk), but it looks great and doesn't overwhelm the room. It looks great with white trim, dark brown furniture, and brown & blue accessories. I love love love love love the way it looks. But I don't have a picture.
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 7:06 AM on May 7, 2008

I was on Citalopram for over two years, and had a similar problem. After the problem persisted for about 8 weeks, my doctor prescribed Wellbutrin XL to take in the mornings, as it counters the side effects of Citalopram, while letting the Citalopram do it's thing. I would talk to your doctor about your side effects and see if this might work for you as well - SSRIs combined with Wellbutrin are pretty common, since a lot of SSRIs tend to be sedating and Wellbutrin is sorta the opposite.
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 2:18 PM on May 5, 2008

I've had a lot of trouble losing weight in the past, and I found that when I was struggling, one of my core beliefs matched this quote from your post exactly:

How do I make myself continue to eat properly when it is just easier to throw a fatty dinner together?

This isn't always true. You have to find a way to make it just as easy and appealing to eat a healthier meal than it is to eat a "fatty" meal. Until you find... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 11:19 AM on May 5, 2008

How do I stop getting upset in the first place?

Since you acknowledge that your reactions are pretty irrational, I think maybe some CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) exercises could really help you. CBT helps you to really analyze your feelings and the assumptions/thought processes that are leading you to feel the way you feel...and once you work through these thoughts/feelings, you can often change the way you react to situations.You can learn some... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 9:13 AM on May 5, 2008

See if you can get one in green or a non-white neutral. I know it's just an accessory, but the less white you can wear to someone else's wedding the better.
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 10:24 AM on May 2, 2008

I don't know if this is any peace of mind for you --- but seriously, cars get broken into anywhere. It doesn't mean that your street isn't safe or that you should fear for your life. The only time my car was ever broken into was when I was in high school, right in front of my parents house in a cul-de-sac in a well-off suburban neighborhood. When I went to college and started parking my car on the street in a relatively sketchy part of town, my car never got broken into.... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 1:33 PM on April 30, 2008

Assuming you drink and enjoy coffee...or can get accustomed to it...get an automatic coffee pot with a timer. Time it to start brewing your coffee about 15 minutes before your alarm goes off. I find that the smell of brewing coffee sometimes wakes me up on its own (in a pleasant way), and at the very least, it's a lot less painful to get out of bed to a buzzing alarm when you can smell the inviting scent of freshly brewed coffee. Having an easy and delicious breakfast to look forward to (e.... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 6:43 AM on April 30, 2008

There are tons of solutions. Some aren't all-natural, but are less "ewww chemicals" than your pine tree (blegh).

- Dried, scented flowers/herbs (e.g. pot pourri, dried lavendar, etc) are the most natural way to go. Crush them a little when the flower dies to rejuvenate the odor. You can also put a little essential oil in them to accent the odor. Keep them in mesh bags or something and toss them in your trunk.
- They make oil infusers for your... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 10:55 AM on April 29, 2008

jeff-o-matic - doesn't the soap melt on super hot days?
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 11:36 AM on April 29, 2008

I am sure you expected this, and it probably goes without saying, but you should really probably see a doctor to ensure that there is nothing seriously wrong. It could be something as benign as the stress of quitting smoking screwing with your hormones, or something totally unrelated to your smoking.

If you've had weight fluctuations due to your quitting smoking, that could also affect your menstrual cycle, but usually not having your period is related to weight loss... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 3:14 PM on April 28, 2008

Seconding good shoes. If it's humid and hot, your feet will get sweaty and in the wrong shoe/sock combination, that can lead you straight to blister city.

On that note, I would also pack some band-aids, just in case.
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 1:45 PM on April 28, 2008

I don't know if you count them as toiletries or not, but since they're not everyday things, and they're vitally important, I'm going to say them anyway: bug spray (mosquitoes & ticks), waterproof sunblock, and hydrocortisone cream (assuming you will spend lots of time outside).

Sunglasses, a novel, my camera, camera charger, cell phone, cell phone charger, and my own beach towel (or two). And a nice host(ess) gift, probably a bottle of wine and something I baked.
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 1:18 PM on April 28, 2008

Could there be some kind of noise that is waking you up? I have found since getting a white noise machine, I have slept a lot more soundly. I've always been the type to get up several times a night, though.
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 10:30 AM on April 25, 2008

Would a bento box fit the bill for you?

What are the bowls made of? I thought they were plastic, but it doesn't say.
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 8:52 AM on April 24, 2008

Laptop lunches are cool but plastic. As are rubbermaid containers...I have a few already.
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 9:00 AM on April 24, 2008

OmieWise - I like your idea of the bread bag.

I still want to get away from the gladware though.
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 9:50 AM on April 24, 2008

I only have a problem with picking at my face & other scratching, but I find that keeping my fingernails really short prevents me from doing it. When they're too short to get anywhere, it makes scratching & picking too unsatisfying to bother with.
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 8:45 AM on April 24, 2008

Pouring over a book.
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 9:19 AM on April 3, 2008

I think CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) can help you with your phobia.

You don't have to see a therapist to learn some of these techniques (though that is an option if you decide you DO want help). There are some great CBT books out there ... the one I think that would be most beneficial to you is the Anxiety & Phobia Workbook.

The exercises in the book seem almost silly, but really do them, take them seriously -- CBT works.... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 11:13 AM on April 2, 2008 marked best answer

I know someone who just did this - they left a fairly high-up management position to work retail in a store they love. No one I know thinks they are a failure - we're all impressed at their guts and kind of jealous.

I also know TWO girls who left their jobs to go to nursing school. One was an engineer, and one had finished a masters in something totally unrelated. So, not only did they "waste" their degrees in other specific fields, but they went ahead and... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 5:26 PM on April 1, 2008 marked best answer

For the most part, you can't. Once you register, people are going to buy you gifts. The stores need to know where to send said gifts, so they force you to provide a mailing address. Creating a registry is a big message to the world that says "buy me gifts pls" and you don't get the option of saying when they may buy you a gift. Some will have the gifts sent to themselves, but most will send it directly to you. The stores aren't there to hold on to things for you.... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 12:14 PM on April 1, 2008

I always take the Tappan Zee when I am visiting friends & family in Rockland County and New Jersey. Just don't take the TZ westbound during evening rush hour, or eastbound during morning rush hour, and you should be fine. It might technically be a longer distance, but it seems to take less time and just generally is a lot less stressful for me.

It's really hard for me to tell you what makes the most sense without knowing more specifically what areas you are... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 11:25 AM on April 1, 2008

Thank you, everyone!
posted to Ask Metafilter by tastybrains at 6:14 PM on March 31, 2008