Pac Man and two ghosts.
Mario, Luigi, and Bowser. (Or Princess Peach.)
"Three of a kind" playing cards. (And if you & a partner also dress as cards, then you'd have a whole hand.)
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 7:30 AM on August 7, 2008 marked best answer

I've more or less given up. I mean, I try to stop -- we use a lot of SpongeBob swear-words as substitutes -- but I'm afraid the damage has long been done. So to balance out the swearing we have had lots of conversations about "home" words vs. "school" words, "daddy" words vs. "grandma & grandpa" words, public words vs. private words... which I think has helped give the kids a pretty good grasp of social nuance and context. At least, it's been a while... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 2:54 PM on August 6, 2008

Ooooh, I forgot about this -- I picked up, "What the French, Toast?" (and some other fun phrases) from this Orbit gum commercial. Other than that, I like the Shakespeare idea very much. But Spongebob's "tartar sauce!" "mother of pearl!" and "barnacles!" (along with the non-Spongebob "motherfather!") have so far proved to be the most satisfying substitutes...
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 7:41 PM on August 6, 2008

Seconding Readerville -- it's a good place for discussion of books as well as the practical aspects of the writing life.
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 6:07 AM on August 5, 2008

This has happened to me with sun exposure (even with sunblock on) -- not always, but occasionally after exposure to the sun, my lips become extremely sensitive and swell up like crazy (sometimes also accompanied by small bumps, but sometimes not). A few days to a week of the mediciney Blistex/Carmex stuff usually resolves it.
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 7:02 PM on August 4, 2008

Scody! My sister-in-law was also a recurring extra in the first season! (Her parents were scandalized by the smoking, even though she assured them they weren't "real" cigarettes.)
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 5:43 AM on August 4, 2008

Creative writing is something I enjoy and do as a hobby, but the thought of the pressure that comes with producing creative things consistently under deadlines stresses me out.

And yet that pretty much describes the life of a professional writer -- producing creative things under deadline is how it works, whether you're freelancing and living gig to gig or writing bestsellers.

I wonder if it's not just the stability vs.... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 11:04 AM on July 24, 2008

Chiming in to agree with those who mentioned mermaids, fairies, etc. -- and to agree about the near inevitability of a "princess"/girly phase that will just as inevitably pass... Actually, at this point, as we reach Hannah Montana saturation in my house, I am looking back on those halcyon princess/ballerina days with as much longing now as I endured them with horror then.

I will say, though, that my smart, funny, princess-loving 5-year-old could not be swayed... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 3:30 PM on July 22, 2008

Danielle at Richard Nicholas (Sansom between 16th and 17th) is *awesome* at dealing with curly hair.
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 11:48 AM on July 13, 2008

In general: If you're crafty/handy, it might be fun to make a card for her that's a mock-up of her book cover, but with a title and blurbs that are all about how awesome she is. Just grab a jpg of the cover off Amazon, use Photoshop, and go nuts -- for the front of the card, use the cover but change the title be "My Awesome Friend: The Best Author In The World (A True Story)" or whatever instead of her actual title (but in the same font as the book cover); for the back of the card, try... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 5:48 AM on July 11, 2008 marked best answer

I wish they had attempted to beat the desire to be an artist out of us. Concentrate on fundamentals instead of self-expression, make us draw circles and squares sixteen hours a day, then tell us we were no damn good. I would have decided to go be an accountant, and those who managed to survive would have graduated with the talent and fundamental skills to rescue themselves from being hacks.

I did have this kind of experience in "art" school... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 9:30 AM on July 10, 2008

I haven't read this, I've just heard about it, but from the title alone it seems to fit the bill: Apocalypse How: Turn the End-Times into the Best of Times! (by Daily Show writer Rob Kutner).
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 6:38 PM on July 7, 2008

The Know-It-All and The Year of Living Biblically, by AJ Jacobs.
Devil in the White City.
A Sense of the World (about a 19th-century adventurer who traveled the world solo even though he was completely blind).
The Family That Couldn't Sleep, by DT Max.
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 8:33 AM on June 25, 2008

Wow -- these are all fantastic answers. I'm intrigued by the make-it-on-the-stovetop method and I may experiment with that over the weekend (how much fresh-ground coffee do you throw in?)... otherwise, I'll head to Target with a better idea of what I'm looking for, thanks to all the info here.
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 3:59 PM on June 24, 2008

(Oh, and the coffee bags -- those look awesome. Can you get them stateside, or are they a New Zealand thing?)
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 4:00 PM on June 24, 2008

Thanks again, everyone -- and jujube, that sounds like it might do the trick. I'll check that out as well!
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 7:14 PM on June 24, 2008

I posted about this more in depth here, but basically the method that works best for me in these situations is: Recognize, Refrain, Relax, Resolve.

An excerpt from Pema Chodron's Getting Unstuck, where she explains this better than I can:

Shenpa is the urge, the hook, that triggers our habitual tendency to close down. We get hooked in that moment of tightening when we reach for relief. To get unhooked we begin by recognizing that moment... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 4:01 PM on June 23, 2008

Sorry to hear you've had a rough start with Philly! I've lived here for 10 years and haven't had anything close to the experience you describe.

Okay, off the top of my head:

* Museums: the art museum is free on Sundays before 1, and has a ton of ongoing activities during the weekdays as well (including after-hours stuff) if you're looking to meet people. Also nearby are the Rodin Museum and the Franklin Institute.
* Fairmount Park:... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 6:27 AM on June 17, 2008

Seconding the Shred-A-Thon! We have done this two years running, and it is awesome. Basically, a local business (here it's the NBC station) works with a document shredding company and sponsors an all-day shred event. You show up with your carload of shreddable stuff, the good Shred-A-Thon folks help you carry it all to some massive shredding trucks, and your piles of documents are shredded in one of those enormous shredders that could shred a couch.... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 6:16 PM on June 15, 2008

On the "tough love" side, I once had a friend say to me (in the midst of a similar lamezilla attack, and in the context of a semi-private joke), "Reality check: you are not the piece of shit in the middle of the floor!" Brutal, but it framed quite dramatically exactly how I was thinking about myself, and it got right to the point of it for me: Asking for help when I need it will not "out" me as the repulsive disgusting thing in the middle of the that no one... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 10:01 AM on May 24, 2008

[ugh -- should be in the middle of the FLOOR that no one wants to touch.]
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 10:02 AM on May 24, 2008

When we were in a similar situation, the rule became that my daughter (8 almost 9) could only hang out/play/whatever with the "problem friend" (not a term I used to characterize the other girl in conversation with my daughter, just short-hand here) at OUR house, under my supervision. When pressed about why (by my daughter), I tried to be frank but not entirely specific -- "I don't know X's dad/mom that well, and I'd prefer that you guys play together at our house" -- and... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 10:06 AM on May 23, 2008

Sometimes slight shifts in thinking are like slight alterations in a yoga pose: one subtle movement and suddenly everything feels different. I've had a few of these moments over the years, some psychological, some practical.

One of the things I did that was small and internal but changed my experience of things greatly was to decide to deal with difficult, unavoidable people by not "biting the hook" -- one day I just realized that if I stopped looking for... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 4:33 PM on May 20, 2008

Do they have kids? Was this a rare opportunity to get some nookie without having the kids around?

I assure you that you can fuck just fine in a twin bed.

See, and I was going to say, as someone married for double-digit years with two kids, that I would VOLUNTEER in a HEARTBEAT for a room with twin beds so I could get some goddamn sleep by myself, ALONE, without anybody getting in my space.

Sweet, sweet... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 9:43 AM on May 20, 2008

Ugh. We are also in the force-a-pill-twice-a-day mode, and it is brutal. Pill pockets? No go, as the pill is too big and our cat is not easily fooled (the pill itself is bright blue, so it's kind of noticeable when it's sticking halfway out of the treat). Pill popper? It takes two people, a burrito-fold into a thick towel, and 30 minutes of shooting it in and her spitting it out. Today what worked was cutting down on her food (which is actually something her vet told us to do anyway, as she's... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 6:26 PM on May 17, 2008

I shower at night, too. I have curly hair, so I put in some straightener/anti-frizz whatever and then braid it into one tight braid in the back while it's still wet. I can sleep like that without getting crazy hair in the morning. (My daughter, who has the super straight hair I long for, must sleep with a braid, on wet or dry hair, otherwise it's a huge tangled mess.)
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 8:55 AM on April 11, 2008

If you're already tall, it's odd to include the inches. But if you're short, well, every little bit helps. I cling to that "and 3/4ths" at the end of my 5'1" like a magic incantation that will indeed extend me to normal person height someday if I repeat it enough. (Just kidding. I usually round to 5'2" because I'm always in tall shoes.)
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 5:40 AM on April 6, 2008

I feel for you -- my kids are now 5 and almost 9, but I spent their early years trying to squeeze 15-20 hours of weekly freelance work into naptime, Dora/Blue's Clues, and bedtime. In other words, feeling totally stressed out for time and money, not to mention worried about not doing a good job at my job(s) and not doing a good job with my kids.

A few things that I tried along the way:

* Signing up my toddler for a nearby "playschool."... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 7:34 AM on March 15, 2008

Have you/your publisher considered blog book tours? If you are a part of or familiar with a blogging community that concerns itself with your kind of book (not necessarily your genre-busting genre, but folks who are fans of the general medium), it would be easy enough to contact those bloggers, offer them a copy of the book, and ask them to post their thoughts on it. It helps if you have a pre-existing relationship with the bloggers you contact -- if they already know you and know your work,... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 5:30 AM on February 29, 2008

Check out Eight or Nine Wise Words About Letter Writing -- words of wisdom from Charles Dodgson, aka Lewis Carroll, author of Alice in Wonderland.
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 6:40 AM on February 27, 2008 marked best answer

I'm so sorry for your loss.

I feel like, for me personally, sometimes it takes a while for my body to catch up to where my head is -- that is, things that I feel like I've come to terms with in my mind seem to take longer to sort themselves out physically. So it wouldn't surprise me at all to find myself sleepless after something emotionally and physically sad and draining, even if I felt at peace with things in my head.

On the practical side, I... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 9:36 AM on February 18, 2008

My husband is an ophthalmologist (though of course not YOUR ophthalmologist) and he says:

"CRVO occurs as a spectrum of disease that is broadly categorized into ischemic and non-ischemic CRVO, the determination of which is based upon your visual acuity and evidence of retinal ischemia as seen on fluoroscein angiography at the retina specialist's office. (Ischemic means, basically, lack of blood flow and oxygen.) It's very important to do a few things -- first of all,... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 5:33 PM on February 14, 2008 marked best answer

From the perspective of an interviewee, I can tell you that being even vaguely familiar with the body of work of person you're interviewing, or even just having a basic acquaintance with the new/noteworthy work in particular, will give you a leg up on most interviewers. (Seriously, I can't tell you how many times over the past 3 months I have been asked some variant of, "So, tell me, why did you write [name of book that rhymes with The Schmangerous Schmook for Schmoys]?")... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 6:15 PM on February 11, 2008

There was/is a show about an animal/creature/thing that farted (Bang Gui Dae Jang Ppung Ppung E)...

Omg, that's *exactly* what I was talking about in this thread! My kids really loved it (and they don't speak a word of Korean). Seriously, a friend gave us some bootleg tape of 3 hours of the show, and it was on constant play at our house for pretty much the whole year my daughter was 3.... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 3:16 PM on February 8, 2008

I got a quarter as a kid, but the going rate around here seems to be $5 and crazy elaborate rituals involving "fairy dust" and sparkles, at least according to the information my daughter has gathered on her reconnaissance missions at school. The tooth fairy usually gives $1 per tooth in our house, but it's true that the tooth fairy has also provided matching funds to supplement piggy-bank savings and has also been known to comply with written requests. My favorite note from my then... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 10:26 AM on January 28, 2008

Super Mario Galaxy, Mario Party 8, Mario & Sonic at the Olympics, Wii Play, and Wii Sports are all easily playable for my kids (8 and 5).
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 5:42 AM on January 22, 2008

Pema Chodron's book When Things Fall Apart has been recommended lots on MetaFilter -- I also just read/listened to her speaking on the subject of "shenpa" and learning to stay. Basically -- in an enormously simplified nutshell -- she talks about the kind of obsessive/repetitive thinking you describe as getting "hooked."

That hooked feeling -- that triggering thing that makes you keep thinking about what happened or how you were wronged -- is called... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 8:23 AM on January 21, 2008 marked best answer

My dad shaved off his full beard and mustache when my sister and I were 3 & 4 or so, and like meatbomb I remember it being a jarring experience. But my little sister took it in stride -- she asked my mom who the stranger was, and when my mom told her it wasn't a stranger, it was Dad, my little sister looked him up and down and said, "Well, I guess now I'm going to have to call you Charlie!"

(P.S. My dad's name isn't Charlie. And I *love* "shavenfreude"!)
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 5:45 AM on January 15, 2008

Thanks for the responses -- I'm working on a MacBook Pro, and the screen settings are whatever they were right out of the box. Maybe I'll tinker around with that. I do wear glasses, but only for watching tv and other faraway things (I'm nearsighted). But maybe wearing them at the computer would help, even though the screen is fairly close.
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 11:09 AM on January 9, 2008

In addition, since you're already susceptible to vertigo, could it be that motion in your peripheral vision could be triggering it?

I think you might be on to something with this, especially since it feels very triggery when I'm reading a lot, and especially when I'm reading very quickly. Maybe I need to start printing stuff out and working on paper instead of reading/working entirely on-screen. Ugh.

(As concerns the screen's finish, mine is matte.)
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 11:38 AM on January 9, 2008

Teleskiving -- thanks. It's the reading/research I do online that seems to be the problem. (I do like to use Scrivener for the writing part.) It's definitely faster to research and read online than it is to print everything out (or go to the library), and on a tight deadline, time is of the essence. But it looks like a compromise is in order. I'm going to try printing out what I can, using my glasses more, adjusting the brightness, and working in smaller bites. Thanks for the suggestions.
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 1:11 PM on January 9, 2008

Working with my glasses on has improved things immensely. Thanks, everyone, for the suggestions!
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 5:06 AM on January 11, 2008

You might want to check out Kevin Smokler's BookTour.com -- he is one of the originators of the "virtual book tour," which mainly focused on blogs about literary fiction. While it's not specifically a blog-tour organizer, it's another good way for authors to be visible online.
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 11:40 AM on January 8, 2008

Yeah, no go on the Chocolate Factory -- that movie creeped me out so bad as a kid I could barely watch it as an adult (my personal nightmares were the boat scene, the bubbles part, and the blueberry girl -- shiver).

My fright-averse kids had a hard time with Monsters Inc and Bug's Life until they were 5, and they preferred to watch Mary Poppins on fast-forward until the part with the chimney sweeps dancing on the rooftops. They found their 3-year-old happy places in... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 7:30 PM on January 4, 2008 marked best answer

When I was working on my first book, and confronting anew my ever-present fraud complex, sure that whatever I wrote would be such crap my editor would consider it more a cry for help than an actual book and that my publisher would demand that I return the advance, etc., I had a very compelling deadline. The book was due to my publisher the same day I was due to have my second child. So there was no getting around it: I HAD to write the book, whether or not it turned out to be a pile of crap.... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 10:09 PM on December 27, 2007 marked best answer

(Aw, davejay, what an awesome dad you are.)
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 7:54 AM on December 28, 2007

Our Babies, Ourselves is great -- also check out "Raising America," by Ann Hulbert (obviously America-centric, but still a fascinating history of the rise of the baby/child care "expert").
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 12:41 PM on December 27, 2007

I went to the Boston Conservatory, and I seem to remember every once in a while they'd have a kind of piano giveaway -- the old practice room pianos that were being "retired" would be available to the public just for the cost of hauling them away. I don't know if they still do this, but it's worth checking into -- Berklee School of Music, Boston Conservatory, New England Conservatory, BU, Emerson... they all might have soon-to-be-retired practice room pianos to be had (groan) for a... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 5:44 PM on December 21, 2007 marked best answer

If it's warm out, and (this part is crucial) if you live for cheesiness, it's pretty awesome. We usually walk over to the Kimmel Center at Broad Street and hang out for a bit -- the kids (5 and 8) get a kick out of it, and when they've seen enough beer-sloshing men in dresses carrying dainty umbrellas to last them until next year, we head home. The "fancy" stuff comes towards the end of the day anyway, and they like to watch that on TV. It's definitely bizarre, but if you go with a... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 7:51 AM on December 20, 2007 marked best answer

Chiming in to agree with the journal idea -- a nice blank journal with a ton of cool pens is awesome -- and to second (or third) the craft/knit-kit idea as well. Maybe a bunch of smaller things like that inside a cool messenger bag?

(Also, thanks for including the Daring Book! I hope she likes it!!)
posted to Ask Metafilter by mothershock at 5:34 AM on December 18, 2007