The Fight For Fifteen

If their spokesfolks are stuck on the old question of why a CEO gets paid more than a fast-food cashier, that's not an encouraging sign that the movement is prepared for an adult-level conversation.

I just participated in a unionization effort last fall, and this is exactly the kind of thing we were trained to say to the media. This is what makes sense to people who make the kinds of news-site comments pyramid termite mentioned (and I saw exaclty... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Miko at 7:29 PM on May 12, 2013

get an economics degree, and get to fucking work

Setting aside the point that if they had access to thigs like economics degrees, they wouldn't be working at McDonald's, The thing is, it's possible to reject entirely this line of thinking. Optimizing for maximum efficiency and cash return is a value system, not a force of Nature or ordained by God, and it flat out doesn't aim to take care of workers, who are... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Miko at 7:50 PM on May 12, 2013

Cost of living, Australia.

What's quality of life worth? Insurance coverage? A good quality free public education? A healthy and safe society?
posted to MetaFilter by Miko at 7:52 PM on May 12, 2013

Bangladesh: Why Any Job Isn't Always Better than No Job
posted to MetaFilter by Miko at 8:00 PM on May 12, 2013

This thread is a nightmare

last night I had a dream I was at my friends C and M's house, one of my favorite places to hang out. Only C was there at the time, and there was a guest over. It was Maggie Gyllenhall. We chatted for a while about why she was there, which was to work at the local museum. And her brother Jake was also going to be working at the museum this summer, only he was going to work on the big monorail project there, because he LOVES monorails.

[in reality this museum... [more]
posted to MetaTalk by Miko at 7:40 PM on May 12, 2013

A Tricky Question, a Disappointing Response.

The reason is that "creep" is a synonym for "sexually undesirable man".

False. It has nothing to do with expressing interest and everything to do with blasting past normal expectations about the boundaries of others as if utterly oblivious.

If OP were attracted to this man, the question would have never been posted and they'd be enjoying the bliss of homemade pizza and massages.... [more]
posted to MetaTalk by Miko at 6:46 AM on May 11, 2013

saying "you should get therapy" doesn't seem helpful

While I understand your argument about cultural context, I still disagree with that. Therapy is really very useful in learning that you are entitled to boundaries, how to develop and define them, and how to communicate them. Therapy can certainly take cultural context into account, and it can improve one's cultural competence wherever you're living. Therapy isn't only for people with whom... [more]
posted to MetaTalk by Miko at 7:00 AM on May 11, 2013

Surely no one thinks there are not reasons other than physical attractiveness (money, power, social capital) that attract young women to older men.

This is a red herring. Once again, we are not discussing the question of whether older men and younger women, or older women and younger men, who are attracted to each other should be able to be together. That is not the question here. We are discussing whether people of any kind should make sexual... [more]
posted to MetaTalk by Miko at 7:17 AM on May 11, 2013

The discussion here is about this particular question

It became broader than that as a result of generalizations about whether people were confusing being older and in a relationship with younger people with behaving in a predatory fashion which seeks to ignore another person's boundaries.

But even if you reread the original MeTa question, the topics at the heart of this discussion are right there in the question.... [more]
posted to MetaTalk by Miko at 7:41 AM on May 11, 2013

when attractive dudes act like creeps I hear it termed "being an asshole" rather than "being a creep".

In my experience there's a notable semantic difference. A person "being an asshole" is being cocky, callous, smart-ass, jerky, betraying, unreliable, pushy, crude, disrespectful. A person "being a creep" is being ingratiating, oily, inappropriately intimate, obsessive, calculating, sleazy, presumptuous,... [more]
posted to MetaTalk by Miko at 1:28 PM on May 11, 2013

he was simply saying "had she wanted to go to bed with him, she wouldn't have been upset at his attempts to get her into bed with him." Which, while true, is utterly beside the point.

It's not necessarily true. I, and I know many other women, can testify to incidents where we were attracted to a man, but found his attempts to get us into bed were unfortunately not appropriate - scary, coercive, sleazy, poorly timed, a... [more]
posted to MetaTalk by Miko at 3:33 PM on May 11, 2013

maybe I've erred in trying to speak a little bit for a position I think Tanizaki has, rather than for myself.

Maybe.
posted to MetaTalk by Miko at 3:53 PM on May 11, 2013

Did somebody propose dramatic assistance?

most people seem to not know this as a sexual tale

Bettelheim says it doesn't matter whether you know, consciously. I think the first part is somewhat obvious, the clitoris comparison is a bit of a stretch for me, but if you believe him when he says this:

All good fairy tales have meaning on many levels; only the child can know which meanings are of... [more]
posted to MetaTalk by Miko at 4:56 PM on May 11, 2013

I'm surprised no one has even suggested the obvious possibility of this (willful sexual risk taking, denial of said risk) being a response to trauma.

You know, I tend to think that sort of thing is always a possibility lurking behind such questions, and it's a good reason to withhold judgment or accusations of trolling or victim blaming. One doesn't really need to openly speculate in order to just remember that it could be present. There are a lot... [more]
posted to MetaTalk by Miko at 7:19 PM on May 11, 2013

Yeah, what do you mean? Who's "throwing women like this in the garbage?"
posted to MetaTalk by Miko at 7:49 PM on May 11, 2013

it could have been a "meet cute" story if not for the fact that the guy was 50.

Oh, come on now. I'm going to take it that you're joking, but haven't we been through enough testimonial now to realize that even if he was 25, that's no guarantee of a "meet cute" story, or better boundaries, or personal safety? I'm sure you were "making light," but is a thread like this a great place for comedy lines?
posted to MetaTalk by Miko at 9:44 PM on May 11, 2013

Thanks for that.
posted to MetaTalk by Miko at 9:52 PM on May 11, 2013

yes, it's hurtful to be automatically branded creepy just because of my age.

As stoneandstar ably pointed out, it's not the age in isolation. It's behavior. It's perfectly normal for people in their 50s to be sexual beings. I certainly plan to be one. But sexual activity, in a principled person, comes with responsibilities, and not taking advantage of others' vulnerabilities, whatever they may be, is one of those. That's nothing at all about age.... [more]
posted to MetaTalk by Miko at 8:41 AM on May 12, 2013

I think this might be contributing to this thinking :/ but I should do as much as I can to change that.


So, are you in a position where you can get access to therapy? Because I think it could really, really help you with those questions and that plan to make a change.
posted to MetaTalk by Miko at 7:04 PM on May 12, 2013

The Untenable Whiteness of Theater (Audiences)

This problem runs right across the cultural sector. It's not an artifact only of the sample, though there are significant institutions/groups who draw excellent audiences - that sector remains really small across the vast number of arts organizations in the US.

This research - well, the Diversity Index - is done by Americans for the Arts, the biggest and most powerful arts advocacy group in the US. The report isn't out yet, but their data is going to be better and more... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Miko at 9:39 AM on May 12, 2013

Flagged as fantastic, Bunny Ultramod.
posted to MetaFilter by Miko at 9:41 AM on May 12, 2013

Most wealthy people are white hence most of theatre audiences are white. I really don't think its any more complicated than that. Theatre just is more expensive than most other forms of evening entertainment.


It's true for the Metropolitan Opera, but it's really not true for theater. I live in a second-tier, post-industrial, blue-collarish city, and we have three places to catch plays. One tiny little black box place does 5 plays a year... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Miko at 11:12 AM on May 12, 2013

And yet those institutions are important anchors for people to be trained in theatrical skills and to maintain certain forms and traditions, as well as to provide some of the few professionally paid skilled positions, including some good union positions. It's not that I think they shouldn't exist at all; they're important in the arts ecosystem. I simply think their operational model needs reworking.
posted to MetaFilter by Miko at 12:21 PM on May 12, 2013

. $20 is a lot of money for me to spend if I don't know that I'll enjoy what I'm going to, which rules out plays I'm not familiar with

Ah, good case study. This isn't a price sensitivity, it's a value sensitivity. You want a sort of a guarantee that you will value the experience enough to justify the price as compared to other things you could have for that price. And the quality of the unknown, the lack of familiarity, makes you risk-averse.... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Miko at 12:48 PM on May 12, 2013

Maybe this is just crazy anxiety on my part.

I think it's at least in part a result of the processes and structures and traditions of arts institutions that you even have to wonder. Creating any anxiety at the barrier kind of kills it from the start. It's like the recent flap that happened when the Met's admissions policy (which has always been that way) got blown open to a new audience by a lawsuit.... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Miko at 6:02 PM on May 12, 2013

youth does not need friends—it needs only crowds

The NYTimes had a good piece on the movie in Sunday's arts section, which I finally got around to reading this morning. An excerpt:

Mr. Luhrmann and his wife are obsessive researchers, the sort of people, she explained, who would almost rather do the homework than make the movie. By now they can both quote by heart great chunks not only of “Gatsby” but of “Trimalchio,” Fitzgerald’s earlier draft, and Mr. Luhrmann’s Web site offers a reading list that amounts to a grad... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Miko at 7:43 AM on May 9, 2013

I just saw it. Can we make with the spoiler-laden reviews yet?
posted to MetaFilter by Miko at 7:56 PM on May 10, 2013

Are there aspects which are spoil-able? I'm assuming anyone who cares has read the book.

I got this same question on MetaChat. It's a book practically everyone has read, but don't you think there is something to spoil when the entire premise of remaking it is to apply the Luhrmann visual/auditory/stylistic flair? Perhaps that's the wrong use of the term spoiler, but how much do you want to read about specific costumes,... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Miko at 6:28 AM on May 11, 2013

Hark a Vagrant's version of Gatsby.
posted to MetaFilter by Miko at 8:15 AM on May 12, 2013

I want to mount items for display and also rearrange the elements later.

How about a floating wall shelf? You could perch them on the shelf and rearrange to your heart's content. for the fabric backing, you could get a piece of MDF and staple a fabric of your choice to it, and perch that on the shelf as the backdrop.... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Miko at 7:06 AM on May 11, 2013

A font? I'd be surprised. They look like pretty standard french curves, and sign painters didn't usually rely on forms like that.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Miko at 1:32 PM on May 11, 2013

Icky karma germs in the ocean?

I agree very much with those who note that death happens everywhere. I find that this understanding is more prevalent on the East Coast, where we have a lot of old old structures that have certainly seen many deaths over their three or so centuries.

The suggestion of performing a ritual is a great one. Do something that acknowledges the feelings that disturb you (his pain, his death, the loneliness, whatever existential fears it raises in you) and then embrace the... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Miko at 7:14 AM on May 11, 2013

Nothing so condescending as kindness.

This is excellent.
posted to MetaFilter by Miko at 9:14 PM on May 10, 2013

Oh what a tangled web we weave...

Get away. This guy's a total loser and not that interested in you, to boot. Dependent maybe, but not really interested. There's basically nothing good enough about anyone in the world that could overcome such lame behavior. He has problems, but needs to solve them on his own. You can't fix him.

I wouldn't disregard that email about cheating, either.

there’s no way for his very kind sister to get a refund on my part of the trip and I... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Miko at 9:04 PM on May 10, 2013

Birds do it, bees do it, even couples on AskMe do it...

My SO is on the site. We hardly ever run across each other, actually. It is fun to have some similar things in our frame of reference and when I talk about people/things from the site, it makes more sense.

You're overthinking it. Just let her be who she is, and you be who you are.
posted to MetaTalk by Miko at 4:27 PM on May 10, 2013

Should I "walk away" (for people who have had healthy relationships)

"even if I could date right now its not like I would want a relationships right now with anybody"-

He doesn't want a relationship with you. Or anybody. He told you in so many words, loud and clear. It hurts to hear, but you need to hear it, and understand what it means. The sooner you do that and move on, the better. And since you're trying to free yourself from toxic people and their confusions and drama....well, free yourself.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Miko at 7:33 PM on May 9, 2013

Do I have to share a hotel room with my coworker?

In my field, which is museums, it's a mix. Senior staff usually do not share rooms. Junior staff, graduate students, fellows, etc. often do. There can be a great deal of pressure to share to spare impact on the budget line. It's not uncommon, and most of our conferences do match-ups. The academics who attend often do share, but I would say this about that: academics attend a lot of conferences, a lot more than people in my field usually do, and so I think their budgets are... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Miko at 7:26 PM on May 9, 2013

JoJo Cookin' kicks off your weekend

This did something very difficult - made me miss 80s pop radio. It was cheeseball, but much better than the consolidated, corporate pop radio we've got today.
posted to MetaFilter by Miko at 7:04 PM on May 9, 2013

"You may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one."

Is "Garburator" a n actual word in Canada? By the context, it must refer to what I grew up calling the "dispose-all" or garbage disposal.
posted to MetaFilter by Miko at 7:34 PM on May 8, 2013

Frost fence. I mean, what else do you call those things? Especially when there's a whole drift of snow piled up behind one?

Well....we actually call them "snow fences."

But there's a certain level of irony even in that, since their most common application here in the Southland is actually to capture blowing sand and slow dune erosion on beaches. So sometimes you'll hear it called "dune fence."
posted to MetaFilter by Miko at 7:33 AM on May 9, 2013

Oh, OK. A snow fence is made of pieces of lath connected with wire.

I don't think we have frost fences then. WE just have chain link fences.
posted to MetaFilter by Miko at 3:12 PM on May 9, 2013

The teen who's keeping you safe from TV spoilers, one tweet at a time.

This recent NPR piece on a college who tackled gender imbalance in computer science head on was somewhat relevant.
posted to MetaFilter by Miko at 6:53 PM on May 8, 2013

Ask not what your book club can do for you...

As a bookstore, you probably know about forthcoming books and who's going on book tour. This is something book clubs might really value - if you know the genre/taste of each club, you can send them alerts about opportunities to host events with authors. Or, if you are the one who puts on events, be sure to invite them and get them to co-promote.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Miko at 2:59 PM on May 8, 2013 marked best answer

What non-sketchy sites can I buy unscented bath beads from?

It might help you to try the term "bath oil beads" since that's the subcategory you're after. "Bath beads" may be bringing up a lot of salts, but it looks like what you want are the bath-oil-filled capsules.

They do sell them in WalMart.

Even with that term, I'm not finding any listed by major suppliers, really. The thing is that they are these wholesale goods that retailers repackage in gift sets and holiday packs. I guess... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Miko at 8:53 PM on May 7, 2013

(So, for instance, the online place you found? They don't need a reputation for "good bath beads" since they don't make them. I think they're all pretty much made in China and all the same, no matter what store you eventually get them in).... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Miko at 9:05 PM on May 7, 2013

The Calgon variety, though called bath beads, are actually powdered bath salts. Someone who likes oil-filled beads might like them to, but they are different products.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Miko at 2:30 PM on May 8, 2013

Boston in lockdown as hunt for marathon bombers unfolds

No, that's not going to work.

Arlington National Cemetery - Prohibitions against interment or memorialization
Congress has from time to time created prohibited categories of persons that, even if otherwise eligible for burial, lose that eligibility. One such prohibition is against certain persons who are convicted of committing certain state or federal capital crimes, as defined in 38 U.S. Code § 2411. Capital crime is a specifically defined term in the... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Miko at 8:56 PM on May 7, 2013

"Makes you feel kind of desperate, doesn’t it?" *Mblgpf.*

Guisewite had Cathy's longtime boyfriend Irving propose marriage on Valentine's Day 2004. The two characters married in the February 5, 2005 strip.
posted to MetaFilter by Miko at 8:38 PM on May 6, 2013

Do I tell him why I am not being my normal, friendly self?

Don't tell him. It's not a responsible thing to do. But find a way to be pleasant to him for the time being. "No contact" is for situations where the other person knows about your feelings. This person has no idea why you withdrew. Even just saying "I'm preoccupied, but I'd rather not talk about it. It's not you." could help.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Miko at 8:34 PM on May 6, 2013

I received some strange mail -- what's going on? Scam? Nut?

I've actually done this to an envelope a couple times if it was a SASE situation. the idea being that no matter what, it's coming back to me.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Miko at 8:31 PM on May 6, 2013