Have a bunch of "NO MONEY DOWN!" loan agreements coming out of your ass.
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 10:42 AM on October 9, 2008

One of my wife's friends once dressed up as "the shower scene" from Psycho. She attached a pole to her back that suspended a hula hoop over her head from which she strung a shower curtain. She would close the curtain, start up a tape with the music playing, and then her husband (playing Norman) would pull the curtain open and go to work on her.

I think it could still be pulled off without the husband, but if you have a partner to work with that'd be better.
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 10:17 AM on October 9, 2008

How do I kiss? Like a nymphomaniac on death row.

But seriously, mostly randomly. Well, pseudo-random, anyway. I'm sure there's some complex algorithm going on deep in my brain that controls which lip I'm currently working on. I do tend to favor leaning my head to the right. Also, my wife and I both wear glasses so we always have a few seconds of clicking and clacking before we take them off.

I'm actually surprised to see so many people favor a certain lip.
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 1:50 PM on October 8, 2008

Not sure about ripping but Apple TV is a pretty brainless way of getting the video from the computer to the TV. It has an HDMI port but It only does 720p. The combination of Apple TV + a large video library (or, you know, the bittorrents) + VisualHub (a one click tool that will convert pretty much anything to anything else) is pretty nice.

My only problem with Apple TV is that it’s often very slow to respond to the remote.
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 1:23 PM on October 7, 2008

Probably no need for the sleepers/plywood floor either, unless you see yourself putting in an actual floor someday.

The reason I would do this would be to keep boxes or furniture off the concrete.

And I probably am overthinking it. I do that with everything, even plates of beans.
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 9:59 AM on October 7, 2008

Re: Drycore. I've looked into it but the cost is more per sq foot and in talking to a contractor he felt sleepers/plywood would be all I need. I've done this before in another house and it was easy enough.

Re: insulation. No need to insulate this room as it'll be storage. When I finish off the rest of the basement (an office and home theater room is planned) I'll insulate that part. I may insulate the wall between the storage area and the future finished area,... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 12:00 PM on October 7, 2008

Suspend a can of sterno from a trash bag. If you do this though, keep the balloon tethered or launch it over the ocean. I wouldn't want a flaming can of sterno landing on my house.
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 8:24 AM on October 7, 2008

"Bones heal, chicks dig scars, and the United States has the best doctor to daredevil ratio in the world."
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 6:33 AM on October 7, 2008

Will knocking down the wall and essentially merging the rooms (there will be an island in between) hurt the resale value of my home?

Not if it’s done right. It could even boost the resale value if it looks nice.

What are some other things I need to think about when doing this?

If the wall is load-bearing the job will be harder and more expensive. There’s no sure-fire way to tell... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 9:15 AM on October 3, 2008

Another thing to consider if you plan on replacing floors in the kitchen. If you have older linoleum flooring there's a good change there is asbestos in it. This isn't a huge deal, and you shouldn't worry about your health, but it will need to be removed by a professional. Your contractor should be able to arrange to have a sample tested before construction.

I mention this from experience. It was a two week delay and (of course) an additional expense.
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 9:46 AM on October 3, 2008

Intrö
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 7:03 AM on October 3, 2008

Put some white russians on the other side of a window. Close enough to see but not close enough to know anything about how they actually taste.
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 8:42 AM on October 2, 2008 marked best answer

At four, it doesn’t have to be too detailed. I would make the bridge going vertical up his body. Draw, or construct from felt, a “road” going up his pants and shirt. Fasten some Matchbox cars to it. Put a railing on the side of each leg and one on each side of his torso, fastened on with safety pins. Maybe give him a hat with an on-ramp. Make the brick trestles out of cardboard or stryrofoam and put it on his back. Bingo, he’s a bridge. He can lie flat on the floor to demonstrate.... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 7:31 AM on October 2, 2008

Wash your hands frequently. Try not to rub your eyes. Use hand sanitizer after touching things like doorknobs and other-people's keyboards. Don't let them sneeze on you. Don't chew on pens unless you know where they came from. Stay hydrated, well-nourished, and well-rested.

If you're like my old boss you can take Emergen-C or Airborne (Did you know it was invented by a teacher!) and then when you get a cold you can claim it didn't last as long as it would have have... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 12:46 PM on September 25, 2008 marked best answer

A doneness chart for various meats (beef, medium rare = 130F, etc). Include human meat.
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 9:24 AM on September 25, 2008

Make a list of your five biggest fears and knock them off the list one at a time. Overcoming fears is the best way to test yourself.

Fear of heights? Take up ice/rock climbing until the heights don’t bother you anymore.
Flying? Take lessons until you solo.
Bugs? plant a garden, pick up bugs and study them.

You get the idea. The point is, if you’re not afraid of jumping out of an airplane than going skydiving,... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 10:31 AM on September 24, 2008

Diner and Popcorn
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 2:54 PM on September 19, 2008

Small engine repair.

When gas is $20.00 a gallon there will be a lot of mopeds and scooters that need repairing. People are still going to be running their snowblowers and lawnmowers, but they won't be buying new ones.

The skills would be transferable to other things, you only need a small set of tools, you can run a business from your garage, and it's the type of thing that spreads by word-of-mouth. "Oh you should go see sportbucket, he can fix anything."
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 1:39 PM on September 17, 2008

It at least goes back to Andrew Dice Clay's HBO special when he told his "standing in line at the bank" story.
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 8:55 AM on September 17, 2008

I was trying to avoid it, this being a family website I was thinking of the children, but if I recall, after the applause died down and he did the “light the cigarette” shtick, he opened with “So I got my tongue up this chick’s ass…”
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 9:03 AM on September 17, 2008

If they're frozen french fries they're probably already mostly cooked. There's no reason to deep fry them. Do what others have said and just put a small bit of olive oil in a pan and heat them through. Stop calling them French fries and start referring to them as home fries and you'll feel better when you eat your mediocre dinner.

If you're going to run out to the store for ingredients you might as well just run out to McDonald's and get some tasty fries.
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 1:51 PM on September 11, 2008

Winter is the best time to go backpacking. No bugs, no beer-swilling yahoos, no crowds, water available everywhere (in the form of melted snow), and there are fewer restrictions on where you can camp. You'll have to put up with coworkers and friends telling you you're crazy, but the little secret is, with the right gear and preparation, you'll always be warm and comfortable. Some of the best times I've ever had in the woods have been in the winter.

A three-season... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 8:16 AM on September 9, 2008 marked best answer

A lot depends on what you mean by “live in the woods.” Will you be backpacking? Walking several miles each day and setting up a new camp every night or will you be stationary the whole time? If you’re stationary, will you again be walking several miles to that location or will your car be 100 yards away?

Self sufficiency is nice, you want to be able to survive alone if you separate from your partner, but in the case of “luxuries” (in this case “luxury” is anything you... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 10:31 AM on September 5, 2008

"Take a wilderness first aid kit" should be "Take a wilderness first aid class"
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 10:33 AM on September 5, 2008

Also, bring about 20 of those plastic electrical ties of various sizes. They can be used to fix just about anything. Those and some duct tape and you're all set.

The only knots you'll need to know are a double figure-8, a bowline, and the aforementioned taughtline hitch. With those three you can accomplish just about anything.
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 10:40 AM on September 5, 2008

You’ll need all new appliances and plugs to plug them into.

The dryer and stove both require 220volt outlets so an electrician will need to run cables to those locations and install the outlets. Depending on where they’re located, this could be easy or very difficult. If the dryer is in the basement, it’s only a matter of running the cable from the electrical panel (assuming it’s in the basement) to wherever the dryer is. If the dryer is upstairs, the cable will have... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 7:48 AM on September 5, 2008 marked best answer

If you already have a well for water you should seriously look into an open loop ground source heat pump (often referred to as geothermal heat) for your heating/cooling needs. The most expensive part is usually the ground loop, which you already have in the form of a water well. They're very efficient, more so than gas or oil and they also heat domestic hot water as a by-product using a little doohicky called a de-superheater. Combine that with a solar hot water system and you could be... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 9:22 AM on September 5, 2008

Fuck, Marry, Kill.

Come to think of it, that would be a good game to play at meetups. Cortex, Jessamyn, Mathowie. Go.
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 8:25 AM on August 28, 2008

You might want to check around on this site or email them to see if they have any information on the wreck.
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 1:19 PM on August 27, 2008

In fact this site has a forum you can ask at.

You can find more resources by googling "Aviation Archeology" It's actually a pretty fascinating hobby.
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 1:28 PM on August 27, 2008

I was scared as well and I was amazed that I adapted immediately. I drove two hours from Shannon to Killarney (after not sleeping on an overnight flight from Boston) and never once had trouble. Literally right out of the parking lot it was felt normal. The only time it screwed me up was, every time I went to use the turn signal I’d accidentally put the wipers on. When I got back home after ten days I did the exact same thing.

I did pay extra for an automatic, which... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 7:52 AM on August 25, 2008

Local H, So Pathetic

Christ, I hate that goddamn song. I never even knew the name of it or the band until I googled the lyrics just now.

Joan Osbourne, One of Us.

Nobody calling on the phone 'cept for the pope maybe in Rome GAAAAH! That has to be one of the worst lyrics in the history of the universe.
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 11:46 AM on July 25, 2008

Hey Macarena was (still is, I guess) really bad but mostly because they’d always play it at weddings so you’d see grandmothers dancing (badly) to a song about a girl whose boyfriend cheats on her so she goes off and cheats with not one, but two other guys. Perfect for a wedding.

Paul McCartney did a song a few years ago that contained the lyrics “there was a biker… he was an icon…” that was so horrible I don’t even want to google it for fear I’ll... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 12:06 PM on July 25, 2008

"I don't know what a Hollaback Girl is – all I know is that I want her dead." -- Brian Griffin

I agree with Brian.
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 12:39 PM on July 25, 2008

They call me Mr. Knowitall
I am so eloquent.
Perfection is my middle name
And whatever rhymes with eloquent.

Primus - Mr. Know-it-all
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 6:19 AM on July 21, 2008

I can't imagine anything girlier than Stickerbook. They’re enough to make R. Lee Emery break out the My Little Ponies.
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 11:33 AM on July 18, 2008

Most of these questions are answered in This Book.

I was disappointed in it, since it didn't focus on the actual food so much as the restaurants, but it was still interesting.
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 12:41 PM on July 11, 2008

Not For Kids Only by Garcia and Grisman is nice. Don't let the connection to The 'Dead turn you off, it's just real nice folksy kids songs. Like if your aging hippie uncle and his pal drank a few beers at the cookout and pulled out their guitars.

It's all traditional stuff like Freight Train, Ain't no bugs on Me, and Shenandoah.
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 10:45 AM on July 8, 2008 marked best answer

Also, a good mix of traditional and originals (that sound like traditional) is Songs for Kids Like Us, by Robbie Schaefer.
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 11:01 AM on July 8, 2008

Boston area. If it’s toasted I call it a grinder. If it’s cold I call it a sub. That might just be me.

Chains like D’Angelos or Subway have “subs”, toasted or not. You can only get “grinders” at the mom and pop places. If there’s a tray of baklava on the counter and every sentence ends with “…my friend.”, then it’s probably a grinder. If they sell good grinders they probably also sell shitty pizza.
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 7:56 AM on July 8, 2008

2nd checking the drain and vent.

If you still go with replacement, check out Toto. According to our architect (a man who, among other things, knows his toilets), Toto is "the only company that got low-flow right."

We have three toilets. Two are Toto, one is a Kohler. The Kohler is the only one that, um, how can I say this politely? Well, it leaves skidmarks. The Totos get rid of everything.

The Totos also... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 6:39 AM on July 2, 2008

I highly recommend the Squeezebox. It can be wired or wireless. You'll need a set of amplified speakers (I use some pretty low-end computer speakers in my kitchen) to use with it.

You need an always-on (or on whenever you want to use it) computer running the server software, though it doesn't need to be dedicated to the task. It's open source and runs on Windows / OSX or Linux, among other OSes. It'll play free internet radio stations plus a bunch of pay services.... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 11:11 AM on July 1, 2008

Do I buy windows and have a carpenter install them?

Be careful here. What happens if one of the windows doesn't fit? Whose fault is it? Probably yours if you bought the windows and the carpenter might charge you extra time to deal with it.

If you can arrange for the carpenter to do all the measuring and put down in writing who is responsible for what, you might be able to find them cheaper and buy them... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 6:25 AM on July 1, 2008

Yes!

Prep your roast as usual. Coat it with a bit about a teaspoon of canola oil, plenty of salt (kosher is best) and pepper. Don't let anyone tell you not to salt the meat before cooking!

Use indirect heat. Keep half your grill off and the other half on about medium. Put an aluminum pan below the grill (on top of the burners or whatever is between the grill and the burners) to catch the drippings. Put the roast over the aluminum pan. Close... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 10:29 AM on June 29, 2008

Just to be clear:

Put the roast over the aluminum pan.

Put the roast on the grill so it's above the pan.
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 10:30 AM on June 29, 2008

We just moved into a new house with one. The heat came on-line in January and kept the house nice and warm even though it wasn't fully buttoned up. Hard to say what the monthly costs are just yet since we only just moved in and haven't lived here during a winter. All signs point to it saving us money on our monthly bills. So far the A/C has been nice to have.

Advanced Energy Concepts in Fitchburg did the indoor part of it and their work was top-notch. Mike Sullivan... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 2:53 PM on June 28, 2008

In my kitchen every other outlet is a GFCI, but the ones that aren't get tripped by the ones that are. Is it possible there's another GFCI outlet nearby (or down on the breaker panel) that is tripped?

Replacing outlets is easy, as long as you a) shut off the breaker and b) test it after you shut it off to make sure it really IS shut off. A $10.00 Radio Shack multimeter or outlet tester is fine. Of course, it may not be the outlet.
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 5:22 PM on June 27, 2008

Lucifer's Hammer by Larry Niven and Jerry Pournelle
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 11:42 AM on June 27, 2008

It's very late 80s, but I don't think you can talk about grunge without mentioning "Rockin' in the Free World" by The Godfather of Grunge, Neil Young.
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 7:32 AM on June 27, 2008

"for shits and Giggles." As in, "I didn't do it for any real reason, just for shits and giggles."

"Pound sand." as in, "If Hollie thinks I'm going to take something from her just because it's German, she can go pound sand."
posted to Ask Metafilter by bondcliff at 11:56 AM on June 25, 2008