Activity from jessamyn

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Who gets to eat this? Quesadilla edition.
Who cooked? How do you guys split food expenses, if at all? Do both spouses work at home or does one take lunch and one eats at home? Does "grownups" imply there are also child quesadillas? How do those get split up?

I have strong feelings in favor of Spouse B since I am a huge fan of leftovers and a smaller person than my SO so I often eat less. I do have a tendency to fetishize the last bite/piece/slice however so I am clear about my desires. If I am saving… [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 4:35 PM on February 25, 2017

Cheap, boring, unhip housing needed in Boston or Metro West
There are also a few suburbs north that might be worth looking into buses for - Hudson and Maynard come to mind. Both have small downtowns and are fairly working-class.

My sister lives one town over from Hudson and works in Maynard and I grew up in that area. Hudson is really trying to style itself as an up and coming location but only doing so-so at it. Maynard has always been a favorite place of mine. Great library, small downtown, good highway… [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 9:34 AM on February 25, 2017

Can I ask this stranger to be my friend?
Would it be weird to a single man to have a married woman ask to be your friend? I would fully disclose being married and not being interested in any kind of relationship beyond friendship.

To me, it's a little weird but not that weird. That is, i would totally do this. For some people, however its super inappropriate so it's worth at least knowing that going into it. Also you say you will disclose that you're married if you interact with that guy in… [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 6:14 AM on February 25, 2017

Very simple budgeting apps and ideas
imagine what he could do with that money if he only bought skins for his main-characters for example

I have a partner with a grown son who is disabled and has similar issues. The first step will be determining if this is something he wants to do, at all. If he's not interested in budgeting, for example, it may be easier to work within the way he views money: if he knows how much things cost (and he has the money) then he can spend that money.… [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 6:07 AM on February 25, 2017

Are top-name artists giving their new albums away on
To the best of my knowledge this is just someone using as a barely-supervised place to secrete stuff. And this is said as someone who used to work there. Try emailing and they will let you know if there's something special going on.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 6:18 PM on February 24, 2017 marked best answer
To the best of my knowledge they don't scan uploads at all and usually require rights holders to contact them for takedowns unless it's a super obvious copyvio or someone they have a pre-existing relationship with.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 5:58 AM on February 25, 2017 marked best answer

Is there a way of categorizing a set of words by emotion or tone?
When I think of people who are doing this sort of work, I think of researchers looking at things like facebook and doing semantic analysis, coding words. You might want to look into the concept of semantic differential. I get in the weeds after that point and don't find lists but it seems like the right jumping off point.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 6:39 PM on February 24, 2017 marked best answer

Minor car accident, damage to both cars, no injuries. What to NOT do?
I'm insured but am I likely to be totally screwed if I don't have the right kind of coverage? I find this stuff pretty confusing. I don't live in a no-fault insurance state. Is this good or bad?

I did something not unlike this over the summer. Just call your insurance company. Basically where I live (VT) if you have collision insurance it will cover the damage to your car (after you pay the deductible) and if you don't (I didn't) you are on the hook… [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 3:02 PM on February 24, 2017

Summarize good internet security and privacy practices... GO!
When I give this sort of talk to librarians, I often include analogs into their world and try to express relative risks (i.e. "a stronger password is better than a weak one") and absolute risks ("you are safer buying something on Amazon than in your local Target because of blablabla data breach") and consequences ("Identity theft is a real thing but often manageable, here are things you can do to stay safe. Here is what your legal liabilities are").… [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 9:40 AM on February 24, 2017 marked best answer
Sorry, an absolute risk is more like "This many people have their identity stolen. This is what that means. This is how you deal with this."
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 9:47 AM on February 24, 2017

Sanity check: whether to break up after (minor?) infidelity
Is it hypocritical to cut things off just once I've been deeply hurt, even though I've been guilty of hurting her feelings in the past?

No. This is a trust issue. Presuming you guys were in a monogamous relationship and this was against the rules of that relationship. For some people it's a bigger deal than others. If you were a couple who had been married for 20 years I might lean towards the "hey seek counseling, try to work this out… [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 7:42 AM on February 24, 2017

Is it really that weird that I don't own a microwave?
It is statistically unusual, but not weird.

Yep. I am another person who doesn't have one since I have no grounded outlets in my rental and almost no counter space. I do have a lot of other kitchen gadgets--electric kettle, toaster oven, panini press, waffle maker, popcorn machine-- that I use a lot. In the US it is super unusual to not have a microwave (which I know because people comment on it) but it works for me. That said, I spend summers in a… [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 7:01 AM on February 24, 2017

Should I speak up to my guy friend, and if so, how...?
Sometimes it can be helpful to ask and then it's easier to follow up.

Him: "I just want a normal American girl who doesn't play any games."
You: "Would you like some advice at this point?"
Him: yes or no or whatever

In this way you are making it clear you have advice but you are not just making him your self-improvement project, you're giving advice if it's asked for.

And it may… [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 6:54 AM on February 24, 2017

Optimise my exercise
I'm also in your general cohort and I pay attention to heart health guidelines. Sounds like you're close to what they suggest but you might want to add one more walk in during the week. Some of it depends what your goals are: muscle tone and flexibility, balance, heart health, lowering cholesterol or blood pressure, bone health, weight control, etc.

AHA Recommendation For Overall Cardiovascular Health:

At least 30 minutes… [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 2:54 PM on February 23, 2017

Name that car noise
I have this on my car which is an older (non-hybrid) Honda CRV but it happens only occasionally, usually when I am driving at certain speeds. Am curious to hear what others say.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 12:10 PM on February 21, 2017
I have been listening for this on my car for the past few days. On my car I only hear it when I am

- traveling uphill
- between 3100 and 3200 RPM

But I can almost predictably make it happen given those parameters.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 2:25 PM on February 23, 2017

I'm using Twitter Wrong
I believe in Tweetdeck you can make a list and then make that list a separate column that only shows you the tweets of people on the list.

Yep, I do this and have one list where I follow 18 people and it's my main view on Tweetdeck. You can also use Tweetdeck to follow hashtags, searches, show your mentions, show your scheduled tweets, or even follow individual users. It's pretty handy. Now going to go get Tweetbot for my phone!
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 11:33 AM on February 23, 2017

What are the best space/astronomy-related activities and events?
My dad had an astrophysics degree and was really into this sort of thing. I grew up in Central MA and one of the things I remember most strongly when I was a kid, even though we probably only did it once or twice, was laying out in the backyard watching the Perseid Meteor Showers. This is a thing you can plan little vacations around and go somewhere dark. Here's a loose schedule but Perseids and Leonids are usually the ones I see up here.

- A lot of amateur stargazing… [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 8:35 AM on February 23, 2017

après le déluge
This happened to me in January of last year. It was a BIG leak (bigger than yours sounds) and we called our insurance co to see about our plan. The leak was covered but we had a high deductible, which was fine. Then we called Serv-Pro. They showed up like a SWAT team and handled things. They were not cheap. They did not need supervision once they were let in to the house. A lot of what they did you could do on your own.

1. industrial drying fans, keep the air moving,… [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 6:52 AM on February 23, 2017

I'm going to go blind? What?
You might want to start with something like the American Academiy of Ophthalmology and look at their section on cataracts, especially cataract treatment. They are definitely no longer a "You're going blind!" sentence. They are treatable. You can even change your mind and schedule surgery sooner if you feel more like that's the way you want to go. Doctors can be sort of abrupt about this sort of thing, I am sorry you felt pressured.

If you prefer reading you… [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 5:46 PM on February 22, 2017

Just don't lick the flagpoles!
Seems like a lot of these school websites have copypasted policies and I'd be super curious to get to the bottom of this. You've probably already seen this site which sums up a lot of existing policies about cold weather play but just in case you haven't.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 4:19 PM on February 22, 2017

Detailed Tech Tales!
A little outside the usual realm but The Turk by Tom Standage is about an early automaton. It's actually (SPOILER ALERT) not a computer but peopel thought it might be, and this was in the 1700s. I like this sort of book and in addition to Soul of a New Machine (in which I have a one sentence cameo) and the Stephenson story, I also liked Just for Fun: The Story of an Accidental Revolutionary by Linus Torvalds, about Linux. Also it's not quite tech but Henry Petroski writes a… [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 3:07 PM on February 22, 2017

Buoyancy question
Keep in mind that one of those chaise things will have you sitting partially upright so you may be able to get away with something 6' around.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 2:59 PM on February 22, 2017

Names of real institutions + shops ok for student portfolio pieces?
Speaking for libraries everywhere, I think this sounds lovely and I bet libraries would both like to see what your students came up with and/or being okay with giving some "This is the sort of problem we need to solve" UX feedback that might be useful.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 9:33 AM on February 22, 2017

Rural internet
I have Fairpoint DSL in Vermont. You can buy it without a land line ("dry loop") if you don't need a land line and save some money. Are you sure that is as fast as it will get? VTel are good people. If you want to drop me a MeFi Mail and tell me where actually you're moving I might be able to give you more local info about options. I would not trust a thing Comcast says. Welcome to Vermont.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 3:29 PM on February 21, 2017

Teaching a small 5 year old dog to only pee/poop outside
With kindness, training a dog out of behaviors that work for him in his forever home may be doing yourself a short-term favor while doing his owners a longer term non-favor.

I concur with others that if the dog is getting exercise, there is nothing intrinsically wrong with him peeing/pooping inside and also agree that you should be able to litterbox train him so that this is simpler for you to manage. And possibly having someone come and walk the… [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 9:45 AM on February 21, 2017

Pond Skating Near Stratton, VT?
As you probably gathered Stratton has a sort of "pond skating" experience that is right there (video). I grew up pond skating (in MA) and this would not really fit the bill for me, but it's very easy and right there. Riley Rink is the big rink nearby and you might just want to call them or the library to ask about options for skating outside. Sunset Lake is the place people skate up near me but that's a schlep from where you are and we're starting to get warmer weather so it may be a… [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 8:46 AM on February 21, 2017

I broke a chair and really need to replace it.
Likewise I have maybe ten of those if you're in the MA area you can have one. Otherwise you can google the chair name from Mchelly's link and look for good deals on Low Country Windsor Back Side Chair and see what you can find. Here is one, not too pricey. I can't tell if it's exactly the same but if so, SKU is 80-C1000S
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 7:47 AM on February 21, 2017 marked best answer

Help me figure out gmail yet again.
Is this one of those cases where people in a company continually make changes to a perfectly good product just so they can justify their continued employment?

Not really. Gmail actually changes less than a lot of other mail services but people have a lot of different use cases that they need to maintain. And they have different versions of it for mobile, for chrome, whatever. I have to do something like this for a class and I just use MailChimp. It… [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 7:22 AM on February 21, 2017

Searching across multiple ebooks on an iPad
To the best of my knowledge this is not possible from the iPad. The hack I would do if this were my problem would be to save versions of the EPUBs without images (probably using regexp which ... bleh) and then just toss them on my kindle for the index factor.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 5:52 PM on February 20, 2017

Why do I clog the toilet?
Do the shower/toilet pipes eventually connect? Is it actually my hair???

Yes, generally. You can see a diagram here. Depending on the age of your house, the age of the toilet and the age of the pipes this could be some coincidences or it could be you, or some combo of what you and your roommates do. Also in the wintertime a lot of drains can move slower because the roof vent can get clogged with snow and everything can get messed up. Don't worry too… [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 5:36 PM on February 20, 2017

iPhoto hangs on import
Just to make sure... the newer iOS won't load the photos unless the phone itself is unlocked (i.e. you enter the code or do fingerprint ID) so make sure you've taken that step. I was surprised by it.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 3:31 PM on February 19, 2017

Online academic resources
FWIW, there are also some piratical sites that specialize in academic content and have an eclectic collection of journals.


So much of this is relative to where you live. I had a whole answer set up and then saw you are in Europe en route to Japan? So my ideas (find a state library, do your searching on JStor and then ask authors, Hathi Trust for older stuffetc) may not work.

A lot of this… [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 11:16 AM on February 19, 2017

How to handle gender field drop down options in software
We deal with this in the library world sometimes where our choice is to remove this but some library catalogs don't have this option but do allow customization. A few things that have been helpful.

- have a "prefer not to answer" option
- have a free text option
- have flavor text "Why are we asking this?" with a link to an explanation so you can get across why you're even asking and that you are at least aware of the issues… [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 10:35 AM on February 17, 2017 marked best answer

HGTV for police stations
One of the things cop shops have been doing lately is providing spaces for people who buy/sell things on the internet to meet in a place that is decently safe. If I were the cops I might try to actually capitalize on this and use it as an outreach opportunity.

Police stations serve a number of different roles but, like the public library, they do serve EVERY single person (or should) and I'd make this clear with a lot of indicators

- accessible… [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 8:07 AM on February 17, 2017

Should I offer financial assistance to my ex-girlfriend?
If I move out she has threatened to not pay rent and leave me on the hook with the landlord.

These are not the words of someone I would be doing any favors. I'd give her a good chunk of time to get a roommate and just make a clean break. You've been more than fair and it's nice that you are being thoughtful. I can imagine it might be tough to date and explain to someone why you're paying your ex-girlfriend's rent. Some of this may be cultural. Where… [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 7:02 PM on February 16, 2017

Comcast set up requires social security number?
I have a non-Comcast cable company. Mine allowed me to actually go into the office with two forms of ID to fill out a form instead of giving them my SSN.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 7:43 AM on February 16, 2017

Managing Gmail Prompts
Is it possible that you can change the contact address to add a nickname so that your proprietary sender started with a letter that no one else started with?

So like: xxmomxx instead of mom which gets confused with mothra which gets confused with moomntrolls. And then you type X which starts no other contact names and then you can send an email to mom.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 2:54 PM on February 15, 2017 marked best answer

Realistically, I probably shouldn't do this
You need to consider the anxiety an emergency and worry about recipes later.

Exactly. I am also cheap-to-a-problematic-perspective sometimes and the baseline issue here isn't food or money, it's anxiety and disordered thinking. Whether this is something that has to do with PTSD, OCD or something different, it it a health problem and one you should get looked at. The other "How do I manage this money problem?" questions are a smokescreen for… [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 9:47 AM on February 15, 2017

Could use some tax guidance after a weird year
Even though Turbo Tax could mostly guide you through this, a tax professional could not only give you more confidence that you were doing everything right but also give you information on best practices for tax year 2017 which would be helpful. After my father died and I had to deal with a bunch of random shared-with-sister financial stuff (including a shared house and some other things) I started getting my taxes done professionally (by an individual accountant guy not someone with a larger… [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 9:30 AM on February 15, 2017

Vermont for the non-outdoorsy
1) You can check the historical weather but July is usually okay with some stupid hot days and August is usually hotter. Cooler the further north you get in the state and at the higher elevations. There's a mountain range that goes through the middle of the state with a lot of nifty tourist destinations all over.

2) There is one airport in the state. There are buses from NYC in to VT some of which are nice. I live Ccentral in the state and Dartmouth Coach has a great NYC… [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 4:03 PM on February 13, 2017

Songs that feature talking?
Candy by Iggy Pop and Kate Pierson has some talking (beginning and middle) and some singing.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 7:54 AM on February 13, 2017
The Waterboys Stolen Child has them singing a poem that is then,later in the song, read. Loreena McKennitt does a cover of it but I don't think it has this part.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 8:56 AM on February 13, 2017

Can my therapist offer up financial services based on our session work?
It's a service that offers to teach you how to get your finances in order and then qualify to buy your first home.

Adding to what everyone else has said, these services are often offered FOR FREE from local banks who are trying to get people prepared for home buying. There's an outside chance based on what you wrote that this is what your therapist is talking about. But those usually don't involve watching videos, etc. And you wouldn't have to… [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 8:00 AM on February 13, 2017

Looking for picture of the 'Brentus firmus' straight-snouted weevil
I don't know if this gets you closer but the species was reported in the journal Revista Museu Paulista 15: 421-542 [478] by R Kleine in 1927.

The guy's name is Richard Kleine. I think he's this guy and the National Archives in the UK have some records of files by him held by the Natural History Museum. This one looks promising since it's the same date, roughly (though it may be too late, there are others). You could try dropping them an email:
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 5:57 PM on February 12, 2017

A mysterious murder mystery
Cliff Janeway novels by John Dunning? There are five not three but they're very good.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 3:14 PM on February 12, 2017 marked best answer

Great quality/good design is cheaper
I have some Bose Model 101 speakers that I've had with me since the late 80s. They're small enough that I can mount them unobtrusively, have a deep rich sound and Just Work. Other similar things in my house: Cuisinart (they replaced my blade after 20+ years!), Kenmore whole house humidifier, Milwaukee drill, Skilsaw circular saw, cast iron pans.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 9:20 AM on February 12, 2017

you're too kind. no really.
I assume you have some method of contacting them. If not, I'd just put this on social media. Set a boundary at this point. "I have donated the gift you sent me to X charity. Please do not send me any more gifts as it makes me very uncomfortable. You are welcome to donate to X charity instead." If they persist past the boundary, then I think it's okay to take more drastic steps. At this point, you have concerns and anxiety but it may not be clear to others just how much discomfort this… [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 8:14 AM on February 11, 2017 marked best answer

Never ending s... inus infection?
Humidifier was really the game changer for me in keeping sinus issues down to a manageable level. Everyone's sinuses are a little different, but there are certain things that should at least be on the "to try" list. For me this is

- keeping the humidifier running non-stop in the wintertime, but keeping an eye on mold growth which would, of course, make things worse
- paying attention to allergens and trying to keep them from getting out of hand. I… [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 7:27 AM on February 11, 2017 marked best answer

Tell me how to high school reunion (30 yr)
"blissfully happy" is really where most people wish they were. That said, I just missed my 30th because it was a little too far away and I'm already in touch with the people from then who I really liked and am not that curious. I know the valedictorian (from my class, we were friends then abnd friends now) and she is high achieving and miserable.

My usual thing for this is to think about a few things that have happened recently-ish that are good stories to… [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jessamyn at 2:03 PM on February 10, 2017

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