This is a straightforward "talk to your doctor" situation. I am a woman of "childbearing age" who is normal weight and healthy and rarely has periods. My reason is that I have a pituitary microadenoma (a very small tumor) that affects my hormones. Doctor says as long as I don't want to have kids (I don't) that I just need to keep an eye on it and I am fine. This might be you. There could be all sorts of other reasons. It's a good idea to get checked out. Keeping track of your... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 5:51 PM on May 20, 2013

From the OP:Yes, she is a contractor/freelancer. She is still below market value for an hourly job, not to mention much lower for a freelancer in her field. I am also technically a subcontractor/freelancer. I no longer live in the same city as my boss, so our work arrangements are similar.

I am considering a raise because I didn't think he was willing or "able" to pay that much to someone. I have always known I am underpaid. I accepted it because others were at... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 5:27 PM on May 20, 2013

Just as an example, I'm short and I gain very easily if I go above 1200 calories, whether it's a cheesy burger or lean turkey in a lettuce wrap.

If what you're doing isn't working, you either have to decrease the amount of calories you're taking in, or increase what you're burning. That doesn't mean you have to exercise longer, either. You just have to up the intensity of whatever you're doing.

This is me in a nutshell. I... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 4:09 PM on May 20, 2013

[Just answer the question and don't pick fights with other commenters, please?]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 3:15 PM on May 20, 2013

Stiff: The Curious Lives of Human Cadavers is the starting point for a lot of people. I found it a little ... light reading for my tastes but definitely an NPR-type approach to the topic. I'm not sure if you want only med school reports but you might also like Bill Bass's books about the body farm (some fiction, some non-fiction) which is also mentioned in that thread if you're interested in forensic tech work. For a more medical angle there's Blood and guts : a short history of medicine not all... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 11:04 AM on May 20, 2013

m I taking this comment too personally? What is a professional and tactful way to be able to say, "I didn't appreciate that comment."? or do I need to just let it go and learn how to deal with the negativity in other ways?

You feel what you feel. I'm a woman who does IT and I have a hard time balancing this personally sometimes. I think part of what has been helpful to me is trying to make a split between what is a problem with the computer... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 8:05 AM on May 20, 2013 marked best answer

she just said that she trusted me and that it was unfair of me to believe otherwise, and we ended up having a row

All the rest of this sounds more or less like your girlfriend being an anxious person who is having a difficult time with this one particular issue and probably needs to be made more aware of her own anxiety reactions and her own role in moderating and managing them. However this part above seems like a problematic made-up argument when... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 10:03 AM on May 19, 2013

I am not a real heavy Soundcloud user but I see it as a lot like YouTube, you may have not very many subscribers but someone can embed your tracks and they wind up getting a large number of views/listeners if it winds up zipping around the internet. Or it was a one-off that people were really plugged in to for some other reason (it was a really popular soundtrack or something) but they might not otherwise be interested in either the Soundcloud environment or community.
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 8:46 AM on May 19, 2013

I think this may be geography dependent. People in my neck of the woods (rural New England) absolutely buy these computers and there is a small build-it/repair-it shop that does a decent business. I think the big deal, if this is possible for you, is not just making/selling machines but offering some sort of value-add service that is either subscription based (some sort of logmein virus scan every month) or somehow recurring ("Buy this computer for $x and get a low cost $y virus scan and... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 7:40 AM on May 19, 2013

If it's a big deal bank there is most likely a way for her to do this via the website. I am sort of having a tough time reconciling large national megabank with "no weekend phone support" I would not under any circumstances give anyone else her info.
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 8:14 PM on May 18, 2013

Would it be expected in the US to let someone know you're sick before you turn up carrying your diseases?

In the US showing up sick unless it's some sort of seriously unavoidable situation where getting other people sick would somehow be acceptable "collateral damage," it would be considered very rude (and weird) to go out to dinner with folks while that sick. Please tell your SO that his concerns about this set of issues are secondary to... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 10:26 AM on May 18, 2013 marked best answer

I am lucky in that most of the Jessamyns whose email I have gotten are 1) decent folks 2) findable on the internet and 3) not weird cranky people. So this happens to me maybe once or twice a week, enough so that I use the "canned responses" gmail thing (maybe it is available in labs?) and have a "You probably intended to send this to another Jessamyn. I do not think I know you. Please check your address book and resend" If I know the other Jessamyn's address, I will sometimes... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 2:10 PM on May 17, 2013

[Folks, please don't start a derail about gmail's addressing scheme, for whatever reason that seems to be a flashpoint in these sorts of threads.]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 6:19 AM on May 18, 2013

Head on up to Windsor and take a tour of the Simon Pearce foundry.

If you're in Windsor you might also want to check out the American Precision Museum (definitely hidden gem) and eat at the Windsor Diner. You can also go to the fusty Constitution House which is not that interesting but very very historical and/or grab a beer at the Harpoon Brewery. Then you can go across one of the longest covered bridges in the US.

I live... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 3:44 PM on May 17, 2013 marked best answer

I am sorry about your mom and sorry this has been so difficult for you. I see no reason to turn this into a phone call. There is no reason this can not and should not be a unidirectional "Here is some information for you" message, email or even a handwritten letter. I totally can hear your pain coming through this question and I think your strong feelings are obscuring that this interaction does not have to be part of the long terrible back and forth that your family has been through... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 3:37 PM on May 17, 2013

The guy who did my will is in the Burlington area and does a lot of specific work with guardian ad litem stuff as well as general work with guardianship stuff (most often for seniors, but also for disabled individuals, I'm pretty sure). He'd be able to give your friends advice or point you in the right direction. Here is his law office and I've worked with him and his other attorney and they're both excellent. This is not to say that the parents will be successful in this situation, but a... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 6:34 AM on May 17, 2013

[Folks, please stick to the question asked and don't debate how parents should or should not treat their daughter.]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 7:46 AM on May 17, 2013

I've used White and Clean for a long time with some minor adjustments and I use VeryPlainText for my blog. Can not help you with running footnotes however, that seems a little high end to me, but I may be out of step.
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 6:34 PM on May 16, 2013

[constructive helpful answers folks.]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 10:42 AM on May 16, 2013

I moved, but my former roommate assures me he gives me all the mail that arrives for me, and he has been on the lookout for this specific type of mail.

Did you forward your mail officially? The very clear and obvious way to check in on this is to call the places you received your certificates from and/or the people you got your loan from and plainly ask them.

Can I contest any compound interest and late fees on the... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 10:21 AM on May 16, 2013

[constructive, helpful answers folks.]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 10:08 AM on May 16, 2013

No there isn't. I am sorry. I have been there.

I answered a very similar question about someone who was hoping to manage alcoholic family members at a wedding. I'll summarize here.

- you can not manage the unmanageable, even though I know deep down you feel that you can
- the stress you are feeling is more like misplaced stress at keeping your stupid alcoholic parents' secret for them, and things will be easier if you... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 8:57 PM on May 15, 2013

From a MeFite who would prefer to remain anon:First things first - congratulations on this big milestone, and well-done! I sympathize, anonymous. My mom was an alcoholic. If you're "out" to any close friends about your parent's alcoholism, I'd suggest asking for help. I did, at my college graduation, and my roommates and best friend (who were fellow graduands) were terrific. They made a few key members of *their* families aware, and with all the tact in the world and none of us saying... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 9:59 PM on May 15, 2013

I am sorry you are dealing with this. I live in Vermont about an hour and change from Burlington and I'd be happy to help on Monday if there's something useful I could do. I don't know any of those criminal attorneys, but there's a MeFite I know who is a criminal defense attorney and I'll MeMail you her contact information. If the car is in donateable shape then you can donate it to Good News Garage, they're our local "donate a car to a good cause" charity. Otherwise you could have it... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 6:29 PM on May 11, 2013 marked best answer

So glad she was helpful. I was in a suffrage-march-reenactment parade this weekend (shut up) and the photo of the parade was on the same page as the (brief) story about your daughter. I am very glad she's okay and hope for her continued recovery.
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 6:47 PM on May 15, 2013

[Folks, OP has heard you, send non-question-answers to email/MeMail and keep them out of this thread please.]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 4:07 PM on May 15, 2013

[Folks maybe let's stick to advice for the OP and not too much random psychoanalysis of this person we don't know.]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 3:24 PM on May 15, 2013

Where are you geographically? I tried this "What is this tree" chooser and it seems like it could be a cottonwood, hackberry or more likely a mulberry bush. These are best guesses if you're in Ohio, based on what i could see from your photos but you might want to step through it (if you're near OH) or try to find an identifier that is closer to where you live. There are, of course, a lot of other options but there are ways to narrow it down fairly easily. Good luck.... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 2:56 PM on May 15, 2013

When I sold my place that was chock full of furniture but not much in terms of personal effects, I had one of those furniture recycling places come with a BIG TRUCK and take basically everything. If I had lived in the area they would have taken it for free. As it was, they took it for $15 which was the cost for them to get out there. They took basically everything. Boxes of kitchen stuff, bookshelves, any furniture that wasn't totally destroyed, boxes of random books/records/dishes, clothing. It... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 11:36 AM on May 15, 2013

I suggest asking the state library. In Vermont at least the state library presides over the official list of place names (and waterways in specific, I know) and so would at least know how these names are arrived at, if not who named them.
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 6:20 PM on May 14, 2013

Not sure if you've gooped up the holes or not but when I've done very similar things I've treated it like stripped screwhole and tried to jam a piece of wood into the hole (BBQ skewers or sometimes even pencils can work for this) and the screw into that instead. How wrecked is the hole itself?
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 11:21 AM on May 14, 2013

Is there a reason you are thinking Boston in the first place? My first glance thought was New Mexico because of

- the lines on the flower are evocative of the flag
- the green fireballs of New Mexico with that thumbelina character

But I don't know the area that well. I've been around Boston most of my life and don't notice clues for it at all.
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 10:55 AM on May 14, 2013

I have a partner with similar though not identical problems. The biggest thing I've been able to do to help support him was to get much much better at separating my moods about whatever happens with us, from whatever happened. That is, I am a person who can get irritable about things and that's a personality issue that I can and should work on. However, it's essential that he not be in a position where he feels in any way blamed for my moods or the state of the relationship because of one minor... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 10:16 AM on May 14, 2013 marked best answer

I know this sounds weird, but I just finished the Golden Compass too (book and then movie) and I dove in to the links at the bottom of the Wikipedia page for the book and that got me started.
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 7:52 PM on May 13, 2013

[Direct answers towards the OP and please take sideline comments to email, thank you.]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 4:31 PM on May 13, 2013

If this was in NYC my cousin is a good personal injury lawyer there who might be a good second opinion for your friend. I'll MeMail you his contact information.
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 11:00 AM on May 13, 2013

Martin Harris is the UK ambassador to Romania and does weekly blog posts, definitely an outsider blog but talks about some of the issues there.

This guy is one of the top Romanian bloggers but he writes in Romanian. At the point at which your Romanian gets better you might want to look up some of these "influential Romanian bloggers"

I lived there from 94-95 and still peek in to the news from time to time. Back when I was there, the... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 9:27 AM on May 13, 2013 marked best answer

[Since this is in MeTa any answer that is not a direct response to the OP or their question should go there instead, thanks.]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 10:01 PM on May 10, 2013

[Answer the question directly or go to the Meta thread already in progress please.]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 11:13 PM on May 11, 2013

I have also had very good luck getting some forms of international postage from either eBay (look for unused postage and the country name) or random friendly people in other countries, depending on how much you need.
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 3:58 PM on May 10, 2013

From the OP:
Thank you all for the advice so far. To those suggesting I just do the slow fade, that's not really possible in this situation. We live in a town where everyone knows everyone and you can't go anywhere without seeing several people you know. It is inevitable that we'd run into each other, at which point I'm sure she'd confront me. Or just show up at my house to confront me. She's that type of person. Would it be wrong to then spell out every reason I have for feeling... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 12:45 PM on May 9, 2013

From the OP:FAMOUS MONSTER's advice is spectacular...except I tried that last night and it somehow got turned around to where I was apologizing. I told her the comment about my weight really hurt me and she said I was being too sensitive. I then told her she doesn't get to decide how I feel or invalidate my feelings. She then said I was rude to ask her to help pay for the rental car. Every time I came back to it, she turned it around. No amount of "let's stay on topic" worked. I... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 1:05 PM on May 9, 2013

[OP please do not turn this into a discussion forum, take the advice you need and then feel free to leave the rest.]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 9:27 AM on May 10, 2013

Forty was when I needed to do a few things

- Start taking better care of myself and paying particular attention to stuff like sleep and stress and how much I was drinking/smoking. Getting better balances on all of those things was a big indicator of how I was feeling and was pretty controllable.
- Likewise I started a regular exercise routine and started paying attention to how I was eating. I ran some numbers and figured it would take me about nine months of... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 8:22 AM on May 10, 2013

Is this a common cultural aspect of academia? Is it common for academic professionals (not students) to share hotel rooms? Do you? Did you have to get over some mild discomfort with the idea? Do you have any words of wisdom from me on this?

I had to do this when I was a traveing librarian on the library's dime. However with my former institution (a large public library and this was a small conference) if there wasn't a same-gender person available to... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 6:42 PM on May 9, 2013

[OP please stop threadsitting]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 3:24 PM on May 9, 2013

[Few comments removed, answer the question being asked.]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 12:32 PM on May 9, 2013

[Constructive, helpful answers folks. ]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 9:30 AM on May 9, 2013

[Folks, honestly, putting your sarcastic answers in Italian does not make them magically okay here.]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 9:58 AM on May 9, 2013

From the OP:Thanks everyone for your comments. It seems as though I've got two options - 1) make food less a part of our interaction, or 2) pick a fight about food choices. I don't like either!

There are a few restaurant options that we can agree on. We get Pho pretty regularly, but obviously it doesn't work every day. Fish is still an occasional option if it is prepared without much oil or batter (she's never been a big fan of sushi unfortunately). Maybe I'll... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 9:00 AM on May 9, 2013