Activity from jessamyn

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Are you holding on to your water? If your salt intake is waaay too low or you use things that can work as diuretics (beer, caffeine), you may be taking in a lot of water but just peeing it out again. Anxiety or these things can cause you to pee more… [more]
favorited 4 times
Ask MeFi comment - 3 weeks ago

I'm not a lawyer. My sister has a medical condition that makes air conditioning necessary, so I understand this issue a little bit. Your friend needs to start taking steps to work to remedy this and you're not at the lawyer stage yet. First step:… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 3 weeks ago

Likewise, nearly all the time. [more]
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MetaTalk comment - 3 weeks ago

My feeling is that while the emotional labor concept is a useful construct for understanding the larger world, the only time it's super useful when in active conversation with someone is when you are talking with a partner or someone you have a… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 3 weeks ago

executrixies That one I made up. [more]
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MeFi comment - 3 weeks ago

dunno what happened but Remember back in the day when pb and mathowie would occasionally push out new changes to the site sometimes late at night sometimes right before a weekend when one or both of them was on vacation? Well I missed… [more]
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MeFi comment - 4 weeks ago

Like not loving my job means I can never do anything much more than acceptable. Do you love your life? Does your job help you live your life in a way that is in line with your personal (not professional) goals? That is also a very good… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 4 weeks ago

Hey, mods, how about turning the "joined" field in the profile to a link to the Metafilter page for that day? That'd be swell! I love this idea. I made a MeFi post the week I joined. The day I made a post there were seven… [more]
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MetaTalk comment - 4 weeks ago

Bah this is the worst! I am so sorry, that is all so hard. When my father suddenly died at home about six years ago (after years of deteriorating health due to his alcoholism) I had what they like to call a "complicated grief." He had been… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 4 weeks ago

lace that matches the color of your dress. [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 4 weeks ago

I have a summer place where I have guests a lot, some of whom are good friends and some of whom are just sort of crashing at my place while they go to the beach. I also sometimes AirBnB my place. I don't think I am awesome at hosting but I do try to… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 4 weeks ago

HEY! It's a team effort! Absolutely. I am hung up, however, on the night I showed up and none of my teammates did. Maybe before your time? I was too shy to walk right back out again so I just hung out and played, on my own. And at the… [more]
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MeFi comment - 4 weeks ago

Librarians are pitched to almost constantly. Nearly everything can be a "resource" for patrons. I don't say this not be discouraging but just so you know what you are working with here. I am a well-known librarian and I get an average of an… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 4 weeks ago

The FDIC insurance limit was raised to $250,000 after the last crash so you only need two accounts. Exactly I was in a similar situation a few years ago and this is what I did to start with. The money will stay there and while you may not… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 4 weeks ago

I am not above (quietly/to myself) spiting my aunt by spending her money on my queer relationship. :) Living well is the best revenge. I spent too much time when I was younger worrying about the feelings of people who were not nice to me… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 4 weeks ago

it is fixed [more]
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MeFi comment - 4 weeks ago

rather than normalize the singular they/them, I would much prefer to see new pronouns for this purpose I think a lot of people feel this way but the science of the way people adapt to "function words" (such as pronouns, words… [more]
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MetaTalk comment - 4 weeks ago

The urine of healthy people contains a decent amount of harmless bacteria. I would dry the hairbrush off and never think about this again. Lewis DA, Brown R, Williams J, et al. The human urinary microbiome; bacterial DNA in voided urine of… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

Enjoyed the Rolling Stone list but some of the later roasts aren't even on their list since it was from 2015. Have to complain about the Splitsider article. Anything claiming to be a History of Roasts where the author just does a cursory YouTube… [more]
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MeFi comment - Last month


huge huge kudos and thanks to Jessamyn, Brad, and bunch of other people who have made this happen. You know how sometimes you have an idea and unlike other ideas this one just sort of makes the back of your ears hot until you have to DO… [more]
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MeFi comment - Last month

make me wonder if we're back to Lorne's default comfort zone, a straight white bros show. I wonder that as well. The last few episodes have had a lot more "punching down" humor than I am used to (Vanessa in River Rapids was… [more]
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FanFare comment - Last month

I'm not a brand-loyal person at all. For almost everything, I'll buy whatever brand is on sale. This is me up to and including mayo. Though coming from a small town that only has one supermarket for 10 miles in any direction, I have… [more]
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MetaTalk comment - Last month

Yeah to me there are two main issues 1. Be reliable. This means being on time, doing what you say, clearly communicating if you can't do those things, and, as much as possible, not making your own issues (whatever those may be, impatience… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

I remember your past questions and it seems like part of this is you and your husband getting more of a TEAM US approach to this and maybe tweaking your message about your need for some structure a little bit because of your new baby. So… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

What helps me sometimes is perspective. I am in a satisfying romantic relationship and I have a decent social group and I like where I live and like what I do for work. And when I tell people I get lonely they are usually pretty much like "What?… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

that it isn't a whim, that you are very serious, that it is no longer negotiable. When my friend who was in a similar situation dealt with this, the interim part between telling and moving, was the most difficult. There was a weird… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

We've had a few users (not that one) who seem to have this sort of "Well actually..." approach to I/P topics and or "how Jews fit in the world" topics which have that internet-nitpicker dog-worrying-a-bone thing which might be… [more]
favorited 11 times
MetaTalk comment - Last month

Yay a roast post! I've seen most of the CC roasts and Jim and I have been poking around at some of the older Dean Martin era stuff. The CC Roasts are so weird because of the odd assortment of people who are "chosen" to show up there. Like… [more]
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MeFi comment - Last month

I don't see it as racist, but I do see it as a little weird. That is, pointing out the otherness of someone else in that "wow, that person is so unlike me/us that it's worth remarking on..." is likely a statement made by someone in a… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

As a frequent traveler who often has to make choices like this, I am completely on Team Jay here (not that it even needs to be about taking sides!). I have friends that I appreciate as people but don't necessarily want to see on a short/stressful… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

I had a neighbor in rural VT who was somewhat like the man you describe and we have gotten into very similar arguments where I felt totally menaced. He is a large, loud guy who has a sort of yelling voice. That said, I knew a little bit more about… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

It was sort of a joke when I was a kid (70's?) that you didn't want to tell people you weren't home so people would occasionally have an answering machine message that had a very clear dog barking on it. My friend's dad made a joke answering machine… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

Part of the idea of privilege (and the corresponding ideas of institutionalized racism/sexism) is that certain things are just easier and you don't even know they're easy because they seem normal to you. I taught college at a community college where… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

For people who are interested in the thing but maybe don't need to be a part of the thing, popular MLTSHP stuff now hits this twitter feed too. [more]
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MeFi comment - Last month

(Confidential to Josh: totally cool but can you remove the MLKSHK entries because they are no longer going to anyplace...?) [more]
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MeFi comment - Last month

But I am feeling panick-y about telling her that we could move because I don't want to be yelled at/face her extremely negative emotions. I'm sorry, I know that bad feeling. Sometimes it's helpful for me to model what… [more]
favorited 12 times
Ask MeFi comment - Last month

It sure is snappier than mlkshk in loading the page. So far. I don't know the specifics but we changed a few things both about hosting and how MONSTER GIFs are rendered that should help with some of that stuff. I am hoping the peppiness… [more]
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MeFi comment - Last month

Yeah we were afraid, originally, that hosting a ton of animated GIFs and hotlinking them would wind up giving us HUGE bandwidth bills that we couldn't manage. The three things that sunk the older site were: legal threats, spammers and irregular $$… [more]
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MeFi comment - Last month

I have done this and made a photo tutorial. As long as it's within first class mail sizes (and proportions, they are fussy about that) you have a lot of leeway. Some of the first envelopes I made were form a moon atlas! As far as sealer, you can get… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

It's actually easy: stay together until you don't. This has been my approach. I would say this does not work if you have certain things you need to seriously plan a life for, like having children. Everything else, literally everything… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

Oh right, that reminds me of the You Can Play project (which started with former Toronto Maple Leafs GM Brian Burke, and his son Patrick Burke) that I made an FPP about, promoting equal opportunity for LGBT athletes. [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month


I didn't realize the Leslie Jones/Kyle Mooney thing was a recurring bit. That is, I think, the third episode of that particular bit. Does Pete Davidson's sobriety segment seem bleak to anyone else? He came across as shaky… [more]
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FanFare comment - Last month

I am a money hoarder. It's a symptom of my general anxiety and some issues about self-worth (thanks lousy parents) and I've been working on it. At some level money is worth the value you put on it and those around you put on it once your basic needs… [more]
favorited 11 times
Ask MeFi comment - Last month

Men and women in AskMe both frequently get told to get lawyers that will protect and defend their legal rights to their home and property. This particular situation seems like one that could be well-served by having not just competent, but possibly… [more]
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MetaTalk comment - Last month

You could also talk about your own anxiety (if you have it) and what medications/therapies have helped you This works for me. My sister and I both have a lot of the same underlying bad-family/genetics issues that have made us anxious… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

ideally we would like to stay in the Bay Area for at least the next 3 years, if not longer. Unless you bring something really special to the area (being bilingual, experience with library tech, experience with specific service populations… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

This sounds like process serving. The downside to this is that the person you are delivering the document to may very much not want to receive the document and so in order for you to complete this task you will have to harass and/or hassle this… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

I believe in karma, or maybe I believe that I can just hex people with my mind when I see them fucking around being awful. But in a lot of ways I am one of those prepared lucky people. So I think a lot of things are good luck omens (even numbers of… [more]
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MetaTalk comment - Last month

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