Activity from jessamyn

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One of the things, along these lines that was helpful for me with recrimination was realizing that in a non-abusive environment, bad things can happen without some worse thing happening. So like... when I was a kid you'd break a glass or something… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

running a Google Docs spreadsheet of spending. All spending I'm doing a variant of this, but with an app (went looking for app recommendations in AskMe, found my question from five years ago, wtf me). After leaving my job at the Archive… [more]
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MetaTalk comment - Last month

However, most of the conversations with friends is listening to their frustrations around parenting, marriage, job, etc. For me it was helpful to understand which sorts of venting conversations were a friend letting off steam because… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

Friends are staying over to watch my place and feed my cats. I think something vague like this is good. "Friends will be in and out looking after the space and my cats" and then maybe give her contact information for more… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

I feel like they were singling out a type of city dweller, not saying "This is a city thing." It's tough because Brooklyn has become sort of ground zero for hipster/gentrification lulz but there are also a lot of people who live there… [more]
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FanFare comment - Last month

I'd be starting at a restaurant place and looking at something that is high-end for a mass reailer but might work for you? So like this page of white bib aprons. The top stuff is basically disposable stuff but as you scroll down you get more… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

I'd be amazed if that sketch wasn't written at least partially by lesbians. I was wondering that myself, but with McKinnon as the only out member of the cast I did find it a little wincey. I mean I got the jokey part about the general… [more]
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FanFare comment - Last month

It is completely appropriate of you to wonder what is up. That said, this can be a normal internet-person response for a variety of reasons ranging from fuckups to life stuff going on to mental health issues. Think what you would like to get out of… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

Some of it depends on where you are in your life already. I think a lot of people get some casual approval (when they're not in a great place) from social media interactions. There are, often, some places that are just for that sort of thing where… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

That seems like a pretty big inconvenience for a night out... I live in a rural area, there is no public transportation at all. And no cabs. A lot of people don't go out drinking as much during the week. So you go out on the weekend and… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

I've got low level anxiety that a noise is coming. I've mostly given up trying to read novels when he's in the room. Hey this is us! I'm a low-level anxious person with a fierce startle reflex and my guy is a noise machine with… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

DOUGLAS YOU SCAMP!!! I am very happy for you all. [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

they needed to do more to help us figure out what happened - is the card here, is it gone, what? Plus, we wanted a written assurance that the restaurant would be liable for any charges to the card between when it was taken from us and when we… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

It's crazy expensive and difficult to emigrate and no nation is pure. Exactly, so I'm a little bit more comfortable if we don't say "You belong to this church so you obviously are okay with what's being done in your name" the… [more]
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MetaTalk comment - Last month

One I like is susurrus which is a whispering murmuring sound. You can probably pick and two of the words on these lists and google them to find other lists! [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

For some people $25 is not that big a deal and maybe she'd already forgotten about it? Alternatively maybe she was annoyed that you offered to pay half of something and then didn't have the money for it? (I mean people differ on how much they feel… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

I'd like to support your perception that "I am safe" is not a good affirmation because it is not actually true. None of us knows if we are safe. I agree, it sounds like it might be more helpful for you to focus on things that… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

I know this feeling SO MUCH Nice work. [more]
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MetaTalk comment - Last month

I have done this! Or something close to this. Parking garages, amirite?! Basically what other people said: while your insurance company will make a big deal about "Tell us everything you do in your car!" realistically they are most… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

This guy seems to annoy the crap out of you. Maybe you are a nitpicky pain in the ass yourself (do you always consider dating people you really dislike?) but I suspect you are not. This isn't working for you so it doesn't work. "I want you"… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

[few comments removed - we don't call people retarded here. My safe word is METATALK. Thanks.] [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

I make dutch babies most weekends now. There is a whole group on MLKSHK dedicated to sharing photos of our favorite babies. The recipe is so damned easy. This is for one, easily doubled. 1/4 c flour + 1/4 c milk whisk it add 1 beaten egg mix… [more]
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MetaTalk comment - Last month

Mod comments are already outside the conversation Well some are and some aren't, is the thing. Mods participate like regular users on the rest of the site but sometimes they jump in and speak as mods. If I am hearing people, what they… [more]
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MetaTalk comment - Last month

So people would think that I am going down the road of "colorblindness" if I say that my children should not think about race but ethnic differences? That certain ethnic groups have privileges, have oppressed others, etc. I… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

I have no luge advice but I do live an hour or so outside of Burlington. Some of this depends on what you like. You really can't go wrong with the Penny Kluse Cafe. It's busy on weekends but a little more reasonable on weekdays. I'm partial to the… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

don't expect a human or worry about having to talk to one. Ha! [more]
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MetaTalk comment - Last month

Sorry for your loss. If it's helpful... Jet Blue won't stick you on a teeny commuter flight (all their planes are big) so even if they cost a bit more money they would be worth booking and they have some flights out of Rutland which is an easier… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

I am the same right down to the tuna salad. [more]
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MetaTalk comment - Last month

no, Jessamyn, it does NOT taste like fish Unlike Eyebrows I have actually eaten shrimp. They are gross (to me) and I do not like them and they are specifically gross in that seafood-y way that maybe is not gross and same-y tasting if you… [more]
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MetaTalk comment - Last month

Working to understand the problem rather than just answering immediate questions has helped give me a great reputation at work. In library school we learned that people often try to solve their information needs in the places that they… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

I am irritable, not - she is irritating Yes! I have done a lot better lately at managing my irritation and this is what helped. - When I'm having that 'bitch eating crackers' thing, asking myself "What are you afraid of?" Now,… [more]
favorited 12 times
Ask MeFi comment - Last month

Melissa VillaseƱor looks to be the Next Big Thing She's super talented and really underutilized (see also Sasheer who seems to mostly get to do nose-wrinkling and doo-wop backup singer stuff) and it was great getting to see her get to do… [more]
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FanFare comment - Last month

Hey I listened to it on my long drive up to Montreal! It was really good. [more]
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MetaTalk comment - Last month

Setting boundaries means believing - really believing - that the other person is responsible for their own feelings and behavior. This is helpful for me. I grew up in a family with bad boundaries and one in which both my parents treated… [more]
favorited 23 times
Ask MeFi comment - Last month

Is the friend somewhere where they could actually make money doing speaking gigs for people who are interested in this specific thing? Are they interested in that? Do they want to do anything personally w/r/t this project? What do they want out of… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

I was taught to meditate in a Hopkins study on meditation and psilocybin. Recreational drugs were helpful to me as far as really understanding mindfulness. When I'd take drugs I realized I felt JUST LIKE ME only with less anxiety. And it… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

is it time for me to accept that I cannot help her and, for my own health and sanity, burn my bridges with her? Part of me thinks that if I do, she will finally learn that she needs help. My father was an alcoholic until he died and my… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

What's something we don't know about you and wouldn't guess? After sixteen years of MetaFilter? Not much. If I wasn't a librarian and general internet person I think my next choice of a career would be cleaning out people's barns and… [more]
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MetaTalk comment - Last month

(possibly to Jessamyn). Hey! I love the mail and I love this idea. I think the only thing I might suggest is having some stamp options in case people might be mailing postcards internationally. I am on the late side of 40. I am… [more]
favorited 1 time
Ask MeFi comment - Last month

I feel like this will mean that heavy AskMe users become even heavier AskMe users which creates a problem and does not solve one. I already feel like for some people it's "THIS WEEK in my relationship...." I live in AskMe, and I may be a… [more]
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MetaTalk comment - Last month

[Folks, maybe less performance art commenting and more having a discussion with other commenters?] [more]
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MeFi comment - Last month

Is it hypocritical to cut things off just once I've been deeply hurt, even though I've been guilty of hurting her feelings in the past? No. This is a trust issue. Presuming you guys were in a monogamous relationship and this was against… [more]
favorited 31 times
Ask MeFi comment - Last month

Part of the house game is also making up little stories.... "That's my house, yeah the little wishing well place. It doesn't look like much but we've excavated down three stories and ... you wouldn't guess that it has a movie theater in it would… [more]
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MetaTalk comment - Last month

You've got a few concerns here - Whatever the local rules are about this sort of thing. There is probably an animal control officer in the town and I'd run it by them. Get a new ID at the bare minimum. - Whatever is safe for your dog, think about… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

Welcome auntie-matter. A good time to remind people about the Hey That's Me page on the wiki. [more]
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MetaTalk comment - Last month

I am sure, based on past conversations, that she would feel that it was childish and weak not to be willing to argue this out for once and for all before downscaling the friendship. So what! You don't even like her that much! At some… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

Am I wrong about not expecting grand romantic gestures? How do you know when someone really likes you? Nah, you're fine. I think that is part of the "good fit" aspect of a good relationship. That you feel like your partner is… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

I need jessamyn's recipe I have emailed it to you. [more]
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MetaTalk comment - Last month

One of the things I like about living in a ruralish location is that there are a lot of neighborhood traditions that you can join in to. In my neighborhood we have the - New Year's Eve party that Forrest and Kelly do - Equinox Brunch that Larry… [more]
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MetaTalk comment - Last month

I used to work for Google Answers! And I don't think the people from there went anywhere in specific. And I agree with ernielundquist it was basically a setup for entitled users/askers a lot of the time and, with very little oversight by the people… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last month

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