Activity from jessamyn

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As I spent the day alone today, I thought of another tactic that can help when you just need to sort of put one foot in front of the other: make everything take forever. That is, at some very real level you're counting down the days until summer is… [more]
favorited 1 time
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

If it's curvy you might be going slower than you think by braking extra in corners (which is your right for safety, but be aware it could be slowing down normal traffic). Yeah I can space out sometimes when I drive on the eight mile curvy… [more]
favorited 4 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

I don't think youre missing out on a whole lot but then again I'm a lot like you. I live alone, enjoy my alone time, have jobs and people I interact with regularly plus a few close friends nearby and more friends in the greater online world and at a… [more]
favorited 16 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

I'm an elected Justice of the Peace in my town. Which, amusingly, has also cemented my general anarchistic affiliations (but I do get to give tax money back to people if they deserve it, and perform their weddings for free, so that's cool)… [more]
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MetaTalk comment - 2 months ago

Every happiness. [more]
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MetaTalk comment - 2 months ago

I'm not totally sure of the nomenclature but the "continuity" thing that lets other non-phone devices get texts and that sort of thing is what you want to be tinkering with. This article does a decent job of explaining it and where the… [more]
favorited 1 time
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

I think you have to use the minus indicator and say "Find this word only DON'T find it in the subject, from, or to lines" so if I search for jessamyn subject:(-jessamyn) from:(-jessamyn) to:(-jessamyn) It will basically find… [more]
favorited 1 time
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

First of all, be kind to yourself. We are all flawed human beings who do the best we can do with what life brings us. You made some decisions that were healthy for you. So, be kind to yourself and keep saying to yourself that none of this is your… [more]
favorited 7 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

"Done the work" just reads to me like a creepy buzzword, nothing more. Me too, mostly. At the same time, when you're a woman looking for men in the online dating world, trying to figure out if people are single and online dating… [more]
favorited 4 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

I had a grad school professor who told me similar advice and it was really helpful! And at the same time, it seems like it works better for work stuff than for interpersonal relations. Like I'd prefer if someone were to ask me out (I'm not single and… [more]
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MetaTalk comment - 2 months ago

It would really help if we had a whole lot less "stalker is romantic" tropes in films and tv. Isn't this sort of what that Adele song is (I know the genders aren't the same) "Called you 1000 times ... I need to go over… [more]
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MeFi comment - 2 months ago

My family is partway Jewish and they gave my sister my (living) mom's name as a middle name. People do what they want and you can find a rabbi to support whatever. For what it's worth I very much don't like the weird "The kid was named for the… [more]
favorited 15 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

Great friends are people who - remember your preferences for food/drink stuff and always make your coffee the way you like it - send you little fun stuff in the mail for no reason - remember things that are going on in your life and ask you… [more]
favorited 111 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

Sometimes people, especially anxious people, can really get derailed when something like the people-from-gym thing happens. Like "Oh god I don't even know how I feel about this guy and now people from the place I go every day will think were a… [more]
favorited 4 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

How's your media consumption? I've found I have an easier time with some of this when I am not watching TV or reading glossy magazines that have BUY MOAR as one of their primary purposes. What's your peer group like? Is this a thing they share? If… [more]
favorited 18 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

Visa has a page full of possible reloadable card options. Your bank really takes weeks to replace your card? I am also assuming you like your bank? But yeah if so a second linked savings account with a debit card should work just fine, good app to… [more]
favorited 2 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

Hey this is sort of what my parents did. They split up when I was 11 and stayed married for mulble-mumble reasons including my dad feeling like he was a failure if they divorced and my mom needing health insurance and being unwilling or unable to get… [more]
favorited 24 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

Partner is bummed I am not excited for their trip and I wish I could be, but the fears drown it out. Yeah I think you're getting a little catastrophizing here. As everyone else has said, not only is this not a very strenuous hike for… [more]
favorited 5 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

I use DownThemAll which will do half of this stuff exceptionally well with no bullshit. It does not (to the best of my knowledge) save passwords and I don't know if you can just start from a link (as opposed to from a web page). [more]
favorited 1 time
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

If I remember right you have recently moved into this house. If the stuff you have in the garage doesn't fit in the house, I guess my question would be "Do you have a plan for it that doesn't include miraculously having space in the NEXT house?… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

So did the person who bought an account to rant against the subject of the original metafilter post minutes after it went up get banned? Nope, not as far as I can tell. They're on our watchlist which doesn't mean much except that we'll… [more]
favorited 13 times
MetaTalk comment - 2 months ago

I have to apologize and acknowledge my ass-hattery for a few other reasons and intend to. This is an admirable thing to do, but read the room. It can be easy to take the giving of an apology and turning it into an "all about… [more]
favorited 5 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

they will say yes when they want to say no, and then hate you the whole time they're doing the thing for you and forever after. * light bulb * [more]
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MetaTalk comment - 2 months ago

I'd like to safely kayak without worrying that a capsize will kill me - how good of a swimmer do I need to be to be appropriately confident that it won't? I was a lifeguard. Most people, even those in boating accidents, do not drown… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

It me! [more]
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MetaTalk comment - 2 months ago

It's sort of a two part thing: how to recognize good design and then how to make the tools make it look good. I really like Butterick's practical typography for understanding how letters and words and sentences and paragraphs fit together. It's… [more]
favorited 3 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

Are you female? I have often been in don't-care situations w/r/t the amount I've gotten paid and people have made the argument (which I'm not sure I agree with but I present it here) that part of what you're doing is setting the going rate for people… [more]
favorited 16 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

My Stroke of Insight is a great beginners "Where do I start" place. It's by a brain researcher who had a stroke so has a lot of first person information in addition to a lot of sciencey stuff. It's good reading and it's optimistic and it… [more]
favorited 3 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

when they are speeding up intake so they don't have to pee at night. This person sounds, from your description, like they may hold some unconventional beliefs about medicine, etc. I'm also presuming (with little data) they you may have… [more]
favorited 1 time
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

The key isn't to find questions that work for everyone but to make sure that everyone has a few secure questions to choose from. Exactly. Many security questions don't apply to me but I consider it a win if at least some of them can. The… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

Yeah the answer to "How to do this?" is "QR codes" as goofy as they are. There are some neat beacon things you could do (examples from libraries) but they'd require people to already be using the software which is probably NOT… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

There's nothing to be gained by confronting them, it just gets you more entangled in their nonsense. I agree with other people, you feel a strong connection to him because of the general personality trait he has about dishonesty and lying. It's hard… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

Coming slightly late to this but I had an anecdote that might be useful. I teach graduate school. The course I am teaching is online and is a class in advocacy for libraries, so learning how to change minds, help people, get things done. One of my… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

Please send me a copy of the file if you do. [more]
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MetaTalk comment - 2 months ago

Your ex had pretty much full time custody of your kid.... Your are under mining that and teaching your child lying to parents is ok. Just a differing perspective on this. Custody arrangements like this one are not uncommon where the… [more]
favorited 7 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

Maybe if you're from Michigan or New Jersey or something you can "just do what you want", but...???????? But nothing. There's nothing special about NJ or Michigan that gives people there special powers. You're making this into… [more]
favorited 41 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

Some of this will depend a lot on where you are. I live in a rural area, and have a nice relationship but with someone who is far away so I like to aim for connectedness in my day to day life also. Some things I do - attend community… [more]
favorited 24 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

I had similar issues in my marriage after growing up with an alcoholic dad and a massively codependent mom. Haha, this is me exactly too! I would look into the mirror and ask myself "Am I being controlling and abusive or am I the… [more]
favorited 33 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

What am I not thinking of? A lot of people manage this transition by setting the new rates at some useful transition point (beginning of 2015 for example) and then opting in to giving existing clients a discount if this is onerous for… [more]
favorited 3 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

Do they need to be 100% sincere? I was thinking about St. Bushmills Choir. I used to see them play every St Pat's in Seattle. Might be a bit too Dropkick Murphys for you. There's also Boiled in Lead. [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

It sounds like they don't have the awareness/energy to acknowledge your feelings right now. Henry sounds exhausting, and I'm sure they're worried and upset all the time. And I totally understand why you would find that hurtful. If you can, I'd… [more]
favorited 7 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

My uncle was heavily involved in the counterculture movement, was one of the founders of the San Francisco Mime Troupe and the Diggers and toured the country in his live-aboard vehicle spreading the word about communitarian living. He is now… [more]
favorited 47 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

It's pretty important to figure out what is causing the smell to learn to address it. And to clarify if the "gross smell" is just one they don't like ir if the room smells literally like garbage, BO or something worse. A few possible… [more]
favorited 25 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

I date a guy with sole custody (kid is now older but was younger when we met) and an unreliable ex and he lives three hours from me. We've been together eight years. It can work! Part of what you need to deal with is boundaries. And he may have poor… [more]
favorited 5 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

Toad baked some cookies. “These cookies smell very good,” said Toad. He ate one. “And they taste even better,” he said. Toad ran to Frog’s house. “Frog, Frog,” cried Toad, “taste these cookies that I have made.” Frog ate one of the cookies, “These… [more]
favorited 213 times
MetaTalk comment - 2 months ago

I feel like this may die down on its own as our relationship continues to go well, and maybe I'm jumping the gun in being concerned. To be clear, I have no issue with my boyfriend being friends with his ex. I just have issues with him being her… [more]
favorited 11 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

I've always been partial--in a general sense--to the idea of an omsbudperson, someone who reported regularly on whether they felt things were working as advertised or not. Someone who wasn't a mod. Someone who had the trust and respect of the… [more]
favorited 18 times
MetaTalk comment - 2 months ago

The big deal that people talk about with burners is that there are a LOT of nutty numbers to type in and so even though these phones are otherwise nice dumb phones, sometimes people prefer the weird AARP-sponsored phones which have a monthly fee, but… [more]
favorited 2 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

Coming back to this today I think one of the things that was so tricky for me and my guy was the difference between me understanding that he could have looser boundaries with his friends (and family, and that was okay) but that TEAM US (which… [more]
favorited 2 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

I had a partner (tho not one I live with) who went through a really harrowing set of years. This was, understandably, tough for everyone. While he definitely had it harder than I did, there was also a lot of tough stuff for me (since what's hard for… [more]
favorited 26 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

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