To put it in simple english: Fantasy without rational thought leads to insanity. With rational thinking, it's the origin of all great art. posted to Ask Metafilter by empathat 10:02 AM on December 7, 2013
His mental health isn't your responsibility, first of all. Whatever you do, and whatever he does in response, is not your fault (as long as you aren't being abusive somehow, of course).
The first thing you should do is move out. And probably with the bare minimum of notice to minimize the drama. THEN, figure out how much help he needs and what you can do to help him. You can't do anything for him while you're living with him. posted to Ask Metafilter by empathat 6:06 PM on December 1, 2013
Litecoin is a better option for this as it depends on ram, and resists parallelization and asics don't really help. It's had a big run up in price in the last week as well. posted to Ask Metafilter by empathat 4:21 AM on November 30, 2013 marked best answer
Anaesthesia is a deeply weird experience that it is okay to feel weird about, and it's okay to feel afraid of surgery. Give it a couple of days before you start to be concerned, imo. posted to Ask Metafilter by empathat 12:23 AM on November 29, 2013
I'm not going to pile on like everyone else, because i totally get where your head is at, and I completely botched a relationship for similar reasons when I was your age. This is what people call 'a learning experience'.
You were so desperate for a relationship and had such a hard time getting one that you basically attached yourself to the first girl that reciprocated any kind of advance, even though you didn't like her that much. And because you didn't really like her,... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by empathat 10:31 AM on November 28, 2013
I resolved it by basically putting those thoughts in a basket and hiding them away. It sometimes comes back on dark lonely nights, when I get that sinking, despairing feeling.
Basically, you deal with it by living your life.
I also have this completely horse-shit theory about quantum mechanics, parallel universes and the impossibility of being conscious in a universe in which you don't exist which can sometimes be a comfort, but I'm not really... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by empathat 3:29 PM on November 27, 2013 marked best answer
It sounds like you're applying for the wrong sorts of IT jobs, to be honest. It's a huge field. Maybe look for something more on the administration/planning side and less on the coding side. posted to Ask Metafilter by empathat 7:32 PM on November 26, 2013
This really depends on your parents. My parents would be thrilled for me to go along with them on vacation until the end of time, I think. Though there is probably a span of time right after you move out of the house where it'd be best to let them invite you. posted to Ask Metafilter by empathat 9:25 AM on November 25, 2013
Don't bother spending a lot of money on wine. Even the 'experts' can't tell the difference. Yellow Tail is a good starter wine, I think. It's cheap, and easily available everywhere, and always drinkable.
To be honest, at 21, your main concern is not getting shitfaced, vomiting on yourself or others, doing something stupid, and how not to end up with a debilitating hang over and especially not drinking and driving or letting your friends do it. posted to Ask Metafilter by empathat 1:35 AM on November 22, 2013
Find roommates on craigslist. You can find a room for a few hundred dollars a month in a shared house in the suburbs, probably.
Do your parents have a life insurance policy on you? You can borrow money against whatever value has accrued there and pay it back whenever you feel like it. That should be able to cover moving expenses and rent for the first month and so on.
But if you're not going to get a job (and your relatives aren't going to... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by empathat 12:12 AM on November 22, 2013
Cover up every window in your bedroom so you can sleep during the day. I literally just pinned a thick dark bed sheet to the wall to cover mine. Start collecting audiobooks or podcasts or something that you can listen to that will help soothe distract your mind while you're trying to fall asleep. Try not to use sleeping pills.
Don't rely on caffeine to stay awake if you can avoid it. I've been struggling with this.
Eat well while you're... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by empathat 11:24 PM on November 21, 2013
For napping at work, I found that the best thing was to drink a cup of coffee and then nap for no more than 20 minutes. That'd keep me going for a few hours usually. posted to Ask Metafilter by empathat 12:05 AM on November 22, 2013
I had a similar conversation about a Jewish conspiracy with someone in Nicaragua, and there was so much wrong in their worldview that lead them to believe what they said that I didn't even know where to start. It's important to know that it's not the conspiracy theory that convinced them that Jews were bad, but their belief that Jews are bad that convinced them of the conspiracy theory. Jews are a convenient scapegoat in Latin America (and especially for Latin American... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by empathat 12:22 AM on November 20, 2013
ONLY. They're coming from the midwest and east coast, where the average temp in January is probably closer to 35.
I would not recommend at all doing it without a car. One, because public transport is not good there and two, because there are a lot of really fun drives in or near LA. Rent a mustang or something, it'll be like 800 times more fun. posted to Ask Metafilter by empathat 1:34 AM on November 15, 2013
but he always told me he never wanted a relationship, not just with me, but with anyone
Nobody ever means this. This is a nice way of saying that they don't want a relationship with you. I think everyone has to learn this the hard way once in their life. posted to Ask Metafilter by empathat 9:51 PM on November 14, 2013
I spent three months in Central America last summer.
1. San Juan del sur is touristy, but neither dangerous nor a hell-hole. There was a lot of partying and drugs there, though. Not at all tranquil. That said, if you go to one of the resort-y hotels outside of town, you'd get your drinks on the beach without noticing all of that. There are also a bunch of beaches outside of town that you need to drive to that are less busy, if you don't want to spring for an expensive... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by empathat 5:14 PM on November 14, 2013 marked best answer
Also,talk to the other tourists on the tour and be open to changing plans. Sometimes they have fun ideas of their own and you can tag along on random adventures. posted to Ask Metafilter by empathat 5:19 PM on November 14, 2013
Feel free to memail me if you have more specific questions. I hadn't thought about flying, because it was out of my budget, but you can certainly fly to costa rica and back for a few hundred dollars if you want. posted to Ask Metafilter by empathat 8:00 PM on November 14, 2013
You need to talk to your coworkers, I think. Everyone takes a while to get their sea legs moving from academia to doing real-world stuff, and they should know that and help get you into the proper work flow. posted to Ask Metafilter by empathat 7:06 AM on November 14, 2013
It looks like you are feeling like you have to calculate all of the next steps just right because you're afraid of doing something to ruin it.
Sometimes doing the wrong thing makes people more appealing. Everyone is different and there's not one right way to be in relationships. If it's meant to be, it'll be easy. The hard stuff isn't supposed to come in the first few dates. posted to Ask Metafilter by empathat 3:02 AM on November 14, 2013 marked best answer
I want to meet someone nice and to enjoy my last year of college.
Can I suggest concentrating on the latter instead of the former? Rushing from one crappy relationship to another is a sure recipe for a bad time. Just enjoy meeting people and hanging out with friends and stop trying so hard to find a husband/boyfriend. posted to Ask Metafilter by empathat 3:40 AM on November 12, 2013
Just to clarify, I've always followed advice in self-help books such as The Rules and Why Men Marry Bitches.
This is probably the cause of 90% of your relationship problems. You're kind of over-focusing on getting into a relationship, and it's probably stopping you from being a fully developed individual. Figure out what makes you happy, by yourself, and do that for a while. If you're happy, and living a full life by yourself, you'll attract a good man without even trying. posted to Ask Metafilter by empathat 4:01 AM on November 13, 2013 marked best answer
Use Feedly and subscribe to a bunch of political blogs. I subscribe to andrew sullivan, daily kos, and talking points memo. I don't subscribe to any right wing blogs, but i'll sometimes look at national review and redstate to get an idea of what they're talking about. I also look at Huffington post a couple of times a day.
I don't think the right answer to avoid being influenced by biased reporting is to look for the mythical 'unbiased reporting', which I don't think... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by empathat 8:48 PM on November 12, 2013
I think the only reason to drop over a grand on a computer is if you plan on buying the oculus rift, because it needs some serious processing power. Other than that, it'll be a while before developers start taking advantage of any hardware that's superior to the new consoles. posted to Ask Metafilter by empathat 8:34 PM on November 12, 2013
Seems to me that if you're buying it out because the kids would be more familiar with it, it would be better to keep the house with whichever person is primarily taking care of the kids. posted to Ask Metafilter by empathat 9:52 PM on November 11, 2013
I backpacked through there for 3 weeks or so last year, and barely knew any spanish, and I was by myself, and I'm about as gringo looking as you get. It's fine. The murders are mostly concentrated in San Salvador, and really just in a few neighborhoods there. I spent a couple of days in the nice part of San Salvador, and It's basically like any big American city.
I would absolutely go. It's amazing. The beaches and pupusas are great, and the Ruta de Flores is... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by empathat 8:27 PM on November 11, 2013
Also -- spend a few weeks practicing on Duolingo before you go, it'll help you a lot, even if it's only reading signs and so on. And grab the lonely planet central america book. posted to Ask Metafilter by empathat 8:30 PM on November 11, 2013
Also, if you are from the United States of America- people, in general, really like that country. They like United States of Americans, and will have lots to talk to you about because it's more than likely that they know someone working in one state or another.
This is really true, too. Also, more than once, random people started talking to me in perfect American accents about how much they miss America since being deported. It's sad, really. posted to Ask Metafilter by empathat 9:20 PM on November 11, 2013
You're not going to get a prescription for morphine, but travel clinics will prescribe stuff like antibiotics. Call the local one and ask them about it. They should be able to take care of everything but controlled substances. What regulation requires that you have morphine on a sail boat? posted to Ask Metafilter by empathat 4:08 AM on November 9, 2013