20 years of line noise and here's to 20 more

#!/usr/bin/perl
@d = localtime(time);
if ($d[4] == 11 && $d[3] == 18 ) {
 print "Happy ".($d[5]-87)."th Birthday, Perl!\n";
}
if( $ARGV[0] eq "love" || $ARGV[0] eq "hate" ) {
 print "$you can't deny its contribution to our culture\n"; 
}