it would be supercool if the entire orchestra could wear skeleton bodysuits.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 7:40 PM on October 9, 2008

ooh, don't hold it. that can just get...uncomfortable.

whenever i get off kilter from travel or whatever, i have a very high-fiber dinner and pop a laxative before bed. a couple of days of this usually do the trick.

if you suffer from rebound constipation, take a stool softener with the laxative and with lunch the next day.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 7:36 PM on October 9, 2008

it might help to slug a couple of glasses in the morning before you head out for the day, just to start the day hydrated.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 7:32 PM on October 9, 2008

can she sleep on her side? they make all kinds of pillows to support side-sleeping pregnant women.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 7:30 PM on October 9, 2008

you can just say, "oh, feel free to call me malcolm--that's what all my colleagues here call me. do you prefer firstname or lastname?"
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 5:24 PM on October 9, 2008 marked best answer

here's an idea: call your doctor. explain what it is, ask if it's something you need to worry about. he might be able to give you some home care options (warm compresses, etc) you can try before going in for an exam.

if the doctor says it's a good idea to come in for an exam, suck it up and tell your folks. you don't have to give them the gory details, just say, "i noticed a bump on my skin in a bad place and talked to dr. xx and s/he thinks i should come in to see... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 5:22 PM on October 9, 2008

if you close the vent, it should be okay. put a piece of plywood over it if you are worried about the metal getting too hot to safely contact the boxspring.

only downside is if it's the only vent in the room, your room might be cold.

you can pick up a set of bed rails for like $25 from a mattress store, fyi.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 6:13 PM on October 8, 2008

1. don't panic. she's that age.

2. have mom take her to a gynecologist if you haven't already. get her on birth control and buy her condoms. this will not encourage her to have sex. it will encourage her to be responsible if she chooses to have sex.

3. have a frank talk with her about sex, sexually transmitted diseases, and babies. the more you talk about it, a) the more she will know and be able to feel better about the decisions she makes--in... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 6:08 PM on October 8, 2008

i would set up a camera and just record. once you get the perp on tape, capture a screenshot and post flyers around the neighborhood saying, "this guy keeps stealing my obama sign. mccain must be so proud."
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 3:13 PM on October 8, 2008

you might want to see an orthopedist to rule out any physiological reasons for this. they can refer you to a physical therapist, who can help you train your body to relax.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 7:38 PM on October 7, 2008

yeah, that's why i was just thinking the first few seasons.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 4:49 PM on October 6, 2008

it's ok--it's actually my cousin's daughter, and i'm 21 years older than her, so she probably thinks of me as an auntie. :)

so maybe i'll give her seasons one and two and tell her that if she gets into it, i'm good for the remaining five--one a year, on her birthday.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 5:40 PM on October 6, 2008

swimming is great. an elliptical may be a gentle source of cardio once you've brought your weight down a bit and have built up some strength.

it would be worthwhile to get your doctor to refer you to a physical therapist at a sports medicine clinic. they can show you how to exercise without harming your knee.

the thing with questions like these, we can tell you how to do stuff, but without someone really checking your form, you can do it wrong... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 1:27 PM on October 1, 2008

if you've only been dating a short while, flowers are enough. i agree that more would probably seem false.

also, the fact that she's sort of taken over her mother's life is a little unhealthy. not horribly or dysfunctionally, just suggests that there's some refusal to let go. best thing would be to honor the grief without pushing her further into the void her mother left.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 8:45 AM on October 1, 2008

blow drying is bad for your hair, but if you use a low setting with a leave-in conditioner, it will be less bad.

blow drying probably will never be -better- for your hair than air drying, but being able to control it while it dries may reduce tangles.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 4:24 AM on September 30, 2008

obviously, don't do anything you don't want to do. BUT, i am a big fan of drastic changes every once in a while, especially hair. if you have been doing the same thing for a long time, it might be a good idea to shake things up a little.

if you are open to cutting your hair, how about donating 10" of it (minimum) to locks of love? it gave a good friend courage to cut the long hair she'd never worn short in her life. then see what you can do with the rest. i used to... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 8:01 PM on September 28, 2008

i used a kill-a-watt to find this out...you use about seven times as much energy using the compressor as just the fan.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 3:06 PM on September 28, 2008 marked best answer

make a trip out to pomegranate in brooklyn. it's an upscale kosher grocery store in midwood. the article said they were planning to offer prepared foods, too, so that might be a nice option.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 5:34 PM on September 25, 2008

you can get your blood typed at your doctor's office, i think.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 5:43 PM on September 24, 2008

tell her you've decided to have the wedding in seattle, that it was a very difficult decision, but that you guys have a year to figure out how to get her there. people fly with far more challenges than incontinence.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 5:42 PM on September 24, 2008

agree with the above--i wouldn't get hung up on labels.

she clearly didn't settle into her sexuality until quite recently--as evidenced by the ex-boyfriends. but just because she questioned and explored for a while doesn't mean she isn't a lesbian. i am not a lesbian, but i think a lot of lesbians do have ex-boyfriends.

it's also possible she was protecting herself against anti-bi bias, but that's not healthy, and the best thing you can do is... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 4:35 AM on September 22, 2008

if you are up for a trip to brooklyn, beacon's closet on 5th avenue in park slope will probably have them, as it is a hipster thrift store.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 10:27 PM on September 20, 2008

please excuse the inevitably crass metaphor here, but it sounds like you guys are trying to fit a square peg into a round hole here.

what she wants you can't give, and what you want she can't give. she wants him. you want her to want you like she wants him. there is a conflict here that cannot be resolved until one of those things changes.

if you just want a f*ck buddy to keep each other warm until love comes along (or returns), she may be open... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 7:01 PM on September 17, 2008

yeah, i can't imagine you can't get decent cream cheese in germany. i wouldn't bother.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 4:36 PM on September 15, 2008

if you want flavor and lower calories, try crystal light. it's actually not bad. definitely not natural, but it tastes pretty good.

alternatively, you could try iced herbal teas sweetened with honey or sugar. or artificial sweetner, if calories are an issue.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 4:22 AM on September 15, 2008

if she's known for her height, she could always go as a beanstalk. wear all green, and tie a toy boy--jack--to her leg.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 6:53 PM on September 14, 2008 marked best answer

foot numbness is not good. go back to your doctor, or find another.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 3:18 PM on September 14, 2008

age and experience, my dear boy. you sound totally normal. don't worry about it. enjoy your daydreams when you have them, and try to take care of yourself when the sadness happens. as your homones subside a bit more from adolesence (they are still probably very high at your age) you'll notice this happening less. also, as you date more women, you'll become a bit more savvy about them, and more interested in the reality than the daydream.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 9:28 AM on September 13, 2008 marked best answer

i think you have to let her go and concentrate on your own life. if it means putting some distance between you two, then do it. explain to her that you have feelings for her that she doesn't have for you, and you need space away from her to let those feelings fade. because right now, if you are looking for an amazing woman and you're spending a lot of time with her, she's going to be the only one who catches your eye. with some time and distance, you'll be able to see what you love about her in... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 9:24 AM on September 13, 2008

your gyn can order the same tests as an internist and since some of your symptoms do seem to be hormonal/gynecological, it's a reasonable place to start. i would go ahead and get an appointment on the books for an internist, too. they usually keep some appointments open for "sick" visits (people who woke up with a fever and need urgent care)--i would be sure to let the scheduler know that you have acute symptoms. the long wait times are usually for routine checkups. just say you have... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 9:09 AM on September 13, 2008

i would skip the moisturizer--i have yet to find anything that doesn't make me break out. instead wash with a very mild soap (like cetaphil) and you'll be fine. if your face feels dry, try buying a humidifier instead of using a lotion.

change your pillowcase often--every day, if you can. wash your hands a lot--you touch your face more than you realize. clean off your phone and the frames of your glasses or sunglasses every day with an alcohol swab.... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 4:32 AM on September 11, 2008

go see an orthopedist. physical therapy may help alleviate the pain, and an mri will help them determine if you have slipped a disc or something less serious.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 4:24 AM on September 11, 2008

take the bus to work and walk home.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 4:34 AM on September 9, 2008

congrats!

if you have problems finding a men's 5, you can probably find a boy's 5.

i agree that contrast stitching is too casual for such a suit. i think doc marten makes women's wingtips that are not at all girly and may fit you better than men's shoes.

alternatively, i think a pair of pumas would look neat.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 4:07 PM on September 8, 2008

er, in black, not blue.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 4:08 PM on September 8, 2008

i'm generally okay with piercings, but in later years have found anything off the face a little silly. so i might be turned off.

i'm going to disagree with the above and say that if you are super-buff, nipple rings would definitely be a turnoff, for the same reason a really flashy car or bling is a turnoff--it would seem to be less about the sensual aspect and more about calling attention to one's buffness. i would be more okay with it on a regular schlub.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 3:52 PM on September 7, 2008

i keep my pens and stuff in a skull mug.
a jar of candy will make you a hit with everybody.
a sombrero.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 3:44 PM on September 3, 2008

for what it's worth, i'm pretty sure ringing ears is a sign of hearing damage. if the new earphones will allow you to listen at a lower volume, great, if not, you might want to rethink your listening habits.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 3:38 PM on September 3, 2008

flowers are always lovely. order dinner in for her--it could just be chinese or a pizza. include dessert.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 3:36 PM on September 3, 2008

riffing on the mythbusters ideas, how about that crazy water-and-cornstarch mix they used for the ninja walk-on-water episode? dye it black instead of blue, and you have something gooey, nonsticky, nontoxic, and fairly inexpensive.

video here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5GWhOLorDtw
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 3:24 PM on September 3, 2008

i wouldn't mess with her food. at this point, she's all like, "why are you replacing my cap'n crunch with oatmeal? i LIKE cap'n crunch!"

she doesn't know how much you spend on her. happiness is your only measure--she's happy with the dry, so give her the dry. if she starts having trouble chewing, they make kitten-sized dry food that is softer and more crumbly. splurge on a nice bed for her or a heating pad to soothe her old bones.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 5:59 PM on September 2, 2008

oh and....most cats LOVE baby food meat. mix some up with dry food and see how that goes. i think you wouldn't want to feed it to a cat for their whole lives (it's not nutritionally balanced for a cat's needs) but for the year or three she has remaining, go for it.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 6:03 PM on September 2, 2008

for what it's worth, i had to earn everything and do all my chores and really, it didn't make me any kinder or more giving. however, i did know how to take care of myself when i got to college, so there's definitely some life-skills value there.

how about making her trade things? if she wants a new toy, she has to donate an old one to charity. ditto with any clothes she has not outgrown. be sure to recycle, reuse, and do other earth-friendly things. make sure she learns... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 5:56 PM on September 2, 2008

definitely dedicate a day to try on shoes. go to DSW if there is one in your area, just because they have a bazillion shoes in lots of sizes. try sizing up or down by a half, or trying wider or narrower widths.

in the young, hip department, i find blowfish and rocketdog shoes tend to be soft and comfortable. she can probably find, at the very least, a flexible pair of ballet-style slippers, which are surprisingly versatile. aerosoles, easy spirit, and naturalizer have... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 9:51 PM on August 29, 2008

i think for light growth, home waxing is worth it. i find it better than epilators, which hurt more and tend to grab fewer hairs in a pass. it sounds like you'd do fine with those at-home pre-waxed strips and following up with a tweezer for the few remaining strays.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 8:12 PM on August 29, 2008

it's not exactly low-fat, but low-carb and yummy: deviled eggs! you can mix smoked salmon into the yolk and top with salmon roe.

you could probably sub the mayo with low-fat sour cream with good results.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 5:32 PM on August 27, 2008

oops, you want high-carb, not low-carb.
well, deviled eggs are still good. :)

stuffed mushrooms would keep.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 5:34 PM on August 27, 2008

in general, things that grow near each other taste good together.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 4:28 PM on August 27, 2008

maybe something that smells tasty, like bacon?
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 3:59 PM on August 26, 2008

honestly, i think this is one of those things you're going to have to learn by trial and error. certainly we can give you anecdotes, but so much of it depends on the intangibles of chemistry and manner that what worked for one guy will crash and burn with another.

i will say, though, don't be afraid to try, and don't be afraid to fail. college is for learning how to negotiate these things as much as it is for learning shakespeare and physics. at first, you will probably... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by thinkingwoman at 6:56 PM on August 25, 2008