You guys rock!
I'll run everything by the guy and mark best answers sometime tomorrow.
Thanks again!
posted to Ask Metafilter by lilywing13 at 11:27 PM on October 7, 2008

Yes, I gave everyone best answers. Thank you all very much for the thought-out answers to help with a fun thing.
posted to Ask Metafilter by lilywing13 at 10:17 PM on October 8, 2008

Hon, I read your blog from start to finish. You really need to get out of this situation, as others have mentioned.

Been there. I once had five stepkids. That's FIVE, and a brand new baby, at the time, in a 2-bedroom, and thankfully, 2-bath, apartment. I don't want to go into details here, but I really hope you MeMail me, if you have the time and inclination.

Also, I have to publicly agree with a lot of the other folks here. Go on a spending... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by lilywing13 at 1:42 AM on October 2, 2008

I feel so much for all the stories here. I'm so grateful, again, that I get to interact with my children and not just photos. Now that they are getting to the exploring ages, I'm more afraid every day.

. to all of those who have lost a child. A thing that scares me everyday.
. and all the love I can send to you.
posted to MetaFilter by lilywing13 at 2:01 AM on September 28, 2008

My mom and I watched the original black and white version of Long Hot Summer after the color remake with Don Johnson had aired. It amazed me that Paul Newman's eyes were SO BLUE even in black and white. And the chemistry with Joanne Woodward!

My sympathies to his wife and children and family.

All the good works. I'm sorry he's gone.

.
posted to MetaFilter by lilywing13 at 1:27 AM on September 28, 2008

Some of the same food banks and churches that can help with food also can provide gas vouchers. Probably not enough to visit your parent, I'm sorry to say, but enough to keep getting to a job and home. Maybe they'd help a little extra if you swallow some pride and explain your circumstances. I understand, really I do, that it's a hard thing to do when you've been working again and are proud to think you're back on your feet. These same folks may want to see what your rent is and your utility... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by lilywing13 at 9:37 PM on September 24, 2008

.
posted to MetaFilter by lilywing13 at 8:48 PM on August 19, 2008

I still frequently check on my children, too. He's 11 and she's 10 now and I let them wander off often when the sun is up.

Please know you're doing fine. I took my two to bed with me, and just the other day my mother let me know that apparently I was increasing their chances for SIDS. Well, not at the time, I wasn't, I told her. When they were babies, taking them to bed with you was supposed to decrease the chance of SIDS.

It's always... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by lilywing13 at 1:36 AM on August 9, 2008

I love the description of "flexitarian" and I once was a vegetarian for a couple years. I became pregnant with my son and started craving the little cheeseburgers from Backyard Burger every single day for lunch. Since then, I mostly seem to be kind of intolerant for darker meats and prefer chicken, fish, and seafood. I also love a variety of grains, beans, and veggies. My honey loves dark, farm-raised beef and venison, etc., and the kids love it, too, but it seems to be hard on my... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by lilywing13 at 10:24 PM on July 29, 2008

nax, it seems like we have similar food preferences. I let the fella cook the "hard meat" as I've taken to call it, and he and the kids love it. I'm sure it's good for them, mostly, but I know it isn't for me. But yeah, I have to go with lighter meats when I have them. No one complains when I make a meal with the proportions you're describing. We all love the veggies and the grains.

I'm still waiting for when my guy gets his first cholesterol report. :)... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by lilywing13 at 10:42 PM on July 29, 2008

Late, as usual. My selections as Muse are the ones that I consider inspirations or those I'd care to emulate. No sexual desire involved, but much respect.

I know folks have said this previously, and I agree, if anyone would like for me to change how they are listed in my contact status, I'm happy to do it. Just shoot me a MeMail.
posted to MetaTalk by lilywing13 at 11:05 PM on July 25, 2008

First of all, you are the child's father. You won't have her taken away from you. The rules will change, but hopefully, the agreement reached with you and your daughter's mom will be reasonable. I don't know the rules about child support and visitation where you live, but, most places, those get decided by a judge, regardless of the marriage/divorce situation.

Get a lawyer! Find out your rights and responsibilities!

My most important advice... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by lilywing13 at 10:18 PM on July 21, 2008

We had a thing like that witch's hat, but instead of a inverted cone to hang onto, it only had metal handles on loose chains attached to the rotating piece at the top. I was a really small kid and got thrown off that thing so many times. I was short, so the first one to get lifted so high that my feet couldn't touch the ground, I had about zero upper body strength. It was also pretty easy to get beaned by the unused handles flying through the air. Kept trying, though. My dad taught at the... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by lilywing13 at 8:23 PM on July 21, 2008

nathan_teske, that's exactly the thing I was talking about! We even called it the maypole, now that I'm remembering. It lived in the 1st and 2nd grade playground of a little private Catholic school. Definitely a character-building torture device.
posted to MetaFilter by lilywing13 at 9:11 PM on July 21, 2008

I spent a couple hours catching up on this thread tonight.
Just adding to the LongBoing at this point.
posted to MetaFilter by lilywing13 at 8:12 PM on July 21, 2008

I just cross-posted over at MeCha. Maybe there will be some folks there who haven't read this here already.

I know the middle of the week is difficult for folks, but we're starting pretty early. I wanted to make sure -t has enough time to get into town and have time to freshen up or whatever before we drag him out on the town.

-t is making a pretty big detour to get down this far south. I'm hoping maybe some of the shy folks will turn up... [more]
posted to MetaTalk by lilywing13 at 8:39 PM on July 14, 2008

zardoz, next time you're in town, please let me know.

I agree that the town has changed a lot. I moved here in '99, but had been a frequent visitor '94-'96, when I would drive up the Pig Trail from Little Rock every chance I had. It has changed a lot even since I moved here. Lots of construction all over the place, on campus and off. More and more sprawl. Still, I love the place a lot.
posted to MetaTalk by lilywing13 at 11:09 PM on July 15, 2008

Just got an update from -t. He's running a bit later than planned. Looks like he's going to be hitting town around 8:30ish.

We're still going to be at D's on Dickson Street at 7:30pm. Likely playing phone tag with the guest of honor until he gets there.
posted to MetaTalk by lilywing13 at 4:43 PM on July 16, 2008

We met, we had food and beers, and now we're watching Dr. Strangelove at my place with more beers. There will be pictures.
posted to MetaTalk by lilywing13 at 10:30 PM on July 16, 2008

If you want to take a detour south and then maybe catch I-40 to Little Rock, where I hear over on MetaChat you may have a meal offer, then please consider Fayetteville, Arkansas. A bed and a meal or two can be certainly be arranged. My kids are at their dad's for most of the summer, so there are extra sleeping spaces. Also, we've never had a meetup here at all, so any reason would be a great one.

If it's too far out of your way, please have a safe trip and best... [more]
posted to MetaTalk by lilywing13 at 11:57 PM on July 8, 2008

-t, I sent you a MefiMail.
posted to MetaTalk by lilywing13 at 12:06 PM on July 9, 2008

We had an Hawaiian themed wedding. My kids walked with me, so there were no bridesmaids. All of the groomsmen got decent matching shirts that complemented my dress and the groom's shirt. Hardly any of them live near each other, so that wasn't a bother. Also, the shirts were nice enough for business casual in their respective areas. They all also got some sort of black nut lei, the name of which escapes me at the moment.

Our budget was very tight, but it all went... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by lilywing13 at 12:28 AM on July 8, 2008

Without the gay angle, which I know can cause other stresses:

I once declared my unending love for my best male friend (I'm female). He was kind and just wasn't that into me, even though we'd slept in the same bed pretty often and felt comfortable enough with each other for backrubs and stuff. We've never kissed or had sex. He felt more like we are siblings than lovers. I was hurt after he turned me down, of course. I left him alone for a bit and we talked on the... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by lilywing13 at 12:15 AM on July 8, 2008

I'd really love to participate in this if it's still going on, too.
posted to MetaTalk by lilywing13 at 9:36 PM on July 4, 2008

I just had a fruit fly problem and made a trap of cider vinegar and a little sugar topped off with water and a couple of drops of dish soap in a shallow glass jar. Watching the daily carnage collect has been very satisfying indeed.
posted to Ask Metafilter by lilywing13 at 12:04 AM on June 21, 2008

Are you getting enough potassium?
Bananas and tomatoes. Works for my kids when they have growth spurt cramps.
posted to Ask Metafilter by lilywing13 at 12:05 AM on May 28, 2008

The uncut "Girls on Film" video by Duran Duran. Not porn exactly, but NSFW, either.
posted to Ask Metafilter by lilywing13 at 12:04 AM on May 28, 2008

My condolences to your family.

I was 6 the year both of my grandfathers died. When the first went, I didn't understand at all. My parents did not take me to the funeral, and, in fact, a couple of gifts were bought for me I know now that these gifts were to distract me from my mother's grief. There was this big gathering of my maternal grandfather's family, so I kept expecting to see him. I can remember asking about when he would arrive, and I can remember that... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by lilywing13 at 1:37 AM on May 23, 2008 marked best answer

Although it doesn't address the shower specifically, I'd like to endorse everything brain cloud says about being a bridesmaid.

Disclaimer: I'm not having a shower this time around. There may be some sort of "married ladies having a nice time" party. Most of my cohort is married or remarried, so that may not apply to your situation at all.
posted to Ask Metafilter by lilywing13 at 12:22 AM on April 21, 2008

More peanut butter love!
My dad liked peanut butter and onion sandwiches. My mom liked peanut butter, pickle, and mayo sandwiches. From my dad, I learned to smear a layer of peanut butter on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. From my mom, I learned to make a breakfast of bread, peanut butter, and an arrangement of the little marshmallows toasted under the broiler until the marshmallows got kind of blackened and crunchy of top, but still all melty underneath.... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by lilywing13 at 10:17 PM on April 2, 2008

I'm chiming in late here. I live in Fayetteville, and the first I'd even heard of all this was when I saw the national edition of the New York Times at work this morning. Frankly, I'm appalled. The public schools here have a supposedly very strict anti-bullying policy. There are signs up all over my kids' school proclaiming it (almost as many as signs for the no peanuts rule, but I digress). I've got the handbook right here that every parent and student is required to sign in agreement... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by lilywing13 at 4:32 PM on March 24, 2008

As Atreides says, this is generally a very nice and open-minded town. We have a wonderful, diverse international community, thanks to the university. The whole town is about as green as it can be. I find it somewhat embarrassing that I hadn't heard one word about this until it was in the national news. It's not something that is typical of the place.

Screw going to Waffle House, though, at least until after we all go for beers. There is a great brewpub down on... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by lilywing13 at 4:46 PM on March 24, 2008

I have a new coworker who has a stutter. I didn't even notice for the first couple of weeks because we were training him, and that's distracting enough.

His stutter isn't very pronounced unless he's getting emotional about the topic, like when we're just BSing to kill time and happen across something that is moving to him. I don't finish his words or sentences for him. It's not a problem when he's working in the lab.

I may (strong maybe,... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by lilywing13 at 11:39 PM on March 18, 2008

UbuRoivas, a couple of those folks are back.

So it goes with MetaFilter; you try to leave and it pulls you back in.
posted to MetaTalk by lilywing13 at 10:50 PM on March 10, 2008

UbuRoivas, martini and a backrub?

I was very interested.
/me then sees masochist comment and wishes luck to anyone who dares to try to mess around with Taz.
Taz is a badass in the nicest way.
posted to MetaTalk by lilywing13 at 12:22 AM on March 12, 2008

I'm hoping to offer a perspective here. I've got scoliosis that was never treatable, so sometimes the upper curve goes out and I end up with quite a bit of pain. Using a mouse a lot tends to aggravate the problem. I've been known to ask co-workers that I was comfortable asking to help with it by the bearhug crack method you mention. They were generally folks I socialized with outside of work or had a really good rapport with. If they said no, that was fine. If they said yes, I ended up... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by lilywing13 at 10:41 PM on March 11, 2008

Loq, I've eaten SPAM both raw and cooked and I hear ya, brother. Cooked is much better and I hear it's very popular in Hawaii. I've also done the Greyhound rides and was once protected by a biker guy who set down a clanking bag of probable weaponry by my side to keep me safe in Montgomery, Alabama at 2am when I was 20 years old. He also offered to get me stoned at the Memphis stop before that, but that's another story.

People make fun of other people sometimes.... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by lilywing13 at 12:20 AM on March 11, 2008

At my apartment complex, we don't have late fees until after the 5th of each month, to accommodate for payday differences, etc. Even then, it's $5 a day until the 10th of the month, and management will sometimes forgive that if you go talk to them with a rare but understandable set of circumstances. Hell, I didn't pay my rent until the 5th this month and felt no worry about it.

Your renter has backup from his mom, as evidenced by the separate check from her. I... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by lilywing13 at 12:00 AM on March 11, 2008

I'm going to be marrying my children's future step-dad in June. We've been together for 4.5 years, and he's courted the kids as much as he has me. My kids are almost 11 and 10 now. My guy's parents are divorced and remarried, so he's had a lot more experience with step-parents than I have, so I listen carefully to what he says about what has worked for him in that regard.

From what I can tell, his best relationship with his steps has been when they haven't tried to... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by lilywing13 at 1:03 AM on February 29, 2008

Thank you, clanger and mostlymartha, for sharing your experiences. Those do help, too.

I had forgotten to add that we're pretty sure she's been diagnosed with alcoholic hepatitis and/or cirrhosis, but we aren't positive. Also the malnutrition seems probable. She can't hold down real food when she gets like this.
posted to Ask Metafilter by lilywing13 at 11:45 PM on February 19, 2008

OP here.

I was going through and marking best answers, but I found myself marking them all.
Thank you all very much for all of the information.
It really does help.
posted to Ask Metafilter by lilywing13 at 3:36 PM on February 20, 2008

I have never liked the color pink very much. I can't really say why.

I dressed my daughter in my son's outgrown clothes when she was born. I had known from ultrasound that I would be having a boy the first time; that's how we ended up with anything but white, yellow, and green for him. Still, most infant clothing is very neutral.

As soon as she could have any opinion of her own, she chose that awful pepto-pink as her favorite color EVAR.... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by lilywing13 at 11:43 PM on February 12, 2008

The day I got my period, I recall that I was proud of taking care of things as Mom had told me where the pads were. Then, I went out riding my bike. It sure wasn't bad that first time. I told Mom when she got home from work and she was proud of me for handling it. She had already embarrassed me about my first bra. She told almost everyone about my first bra and I wanted to just die.

She also understood when my periods did get more difficult for me a couple years... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by lilywing13 at 12:34 AM on February 2, 2008

You don't say how long you've been together or whether YOU want kids as part of the plan or not. So, all I can give is personal experience.

Like your SO, I was an "oops" child and an only child. Just as an aside, my parents are still married and have been mostly happy with each other for as long as I can remember. They were good friends first and that's the basis for their relationship even now.

I never much liked other people's... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by lilywing13 at 10:32 PM on January 29, 2008

Just a little more input, my son is 10 and my daughter is 9, so I'm quite biased at this point.

I'm about to be 40 this summer and had my tubes tied when my daughter was born, so having more is really not an option for me now. I'm kind of glad about that because I know lots of new moms and pregnant ladies who are almost my age right now, and it has been making my ovaries throb. Like the last gonging of my biological clock. The nicest part for me is that I can play... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by lilywing13 at 12:38 AM on January 30, 2008

First, I'd like to say that I've been taking the writer's strike seriously and find their requests reasonable. If you write something that gets put on the internet and not on TV, well, you should still be paid for it. Especially if everyone else is making money off of it time and time again from advertisers. Please excuse me if I'm oversimplifying things, but that's my basic understanding as a layperson. There isn't a lot I watch on TV regularly, but I am missing my favorite shows. Thank... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by lilywing13 at 10:46 PM on January 14, 2008

I finally got a chance to download and listen to this, and goddamn, if it isn't wonderful!
Nice work, y'all.
posted to MeFi Music by lilywing13 at 10:47 PM on January 3, 2008

I'm nowhere near there, or I'd've shown up.
Hope you all had a great night.
posted to MetaTalk by lilywing13 at 11:36 PM on December 25, 2007

If ColdChef ever happens into this thread, and I hope he does, listen to his advice.
posted to Ask Metafilter by lilywing13 at 10:55 PM on December 10, 2007

Also, I could not do what you do every day. I'm sure there is a huge amount of burnout. If you can do what you do, and give these deceased people some respect and maybe justice at the end of the day, then, you are doing really good work. It's not an easy job, and there's no shame if you need to do something else.
posted to Ask Metafilter by lilywing13 at 10:59 PM on December 10, 2007