How to grow and maintain the perfect handlebar moustache.

A hirsute appendage of the upper lip, with graspable extremities. The perfect moustache grows only on the upper lip. You may choose a pomade of wax to assist in daily maintenance. In the early stages of growth, before the moustache is properly trained, you may choose to use a moustache cup in polite soup-eating company. After months of patience, you will be entitled to join the brotherhood, compete at national and international level, raise money for charity and serve your country in the most difficult circumstances.
posted to MetaFilter by baggymp at 3:11 PM on December 29, 2007 (51 comments)