I'm American, born to Indian parents, and definitely had to spend a lot of time learning what matters to the people of various races & religions that I dated. It's certainly not obvious what's important to a family, but the way you find out is by asking and really LISTENING.
Nobody's saying you should feel bad for not knowing, but that you didn't work hard enough to learn, and there are indications that the reason for this was you have objectified her too much to... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by anildashat 5:31 PM on November 30, 2013
If this really is one of the last times your kids may spend time with them, then do your kids the kindness of getting to know their grandparents as they really are.
"Dad, you didn't raise us to talk about people of other faiths that way, and I expect I'll show my kids the tolerance you taught us growing up. But can you explain to our kids why you now say things that you would have punished us for at their age?" posted to Ask Metafilter by anildashat 1:21 PM on November 30, 2013
Hot Chip's "Down With Prince" is about those who pretend to be down with, you know, Prince.
Smot's "Prince Alone in the Studio" is about Prince, alone, in his studio.
Ice-T's "What Can I Do?" mentions buying a house next to Prince.
Prince's own "Ballad of Dorothy Parker" mentions Joni (Mitchell) singing "Help Me".
Prince has several other songs that mention other artists, but more as... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by anildashat 2:03 PM on November 8, 2013
Goddamnit, that's Ice Cube, not Ice-T. posted to Ask Metafilter by anildashat 2:11 PM on November 8, 2013
Pick one of the most distinct moods someone might feel or record when using the app, the kind of nuanced thing that's not just the "happy" or "sad" they'd log in another app. Use that as the name, so that you have a name which exemplifies exactly what's unique about your app. posted to Ask Metafilter by anildashat 9:06 PM on November 5, 2013 marked best answer
Hi! I've never even had my phone turned on during a movie, let alone texted or talked during one. But hey.
Here's a simple, non-inflammatory statement of my argument:
* There are people who see going to movies as a reverent experience, with expectations of essentially zero light and sound being emitted except from the film.
* There are people who see going to the moves as being a bit more like going to a sporting event, where people... [more] posted to MetaFilter by anildashat 5:03 PM on August 8, 2013
Yeah, to Matt's point, we're clearly a few years away from having Quiet Car theaters (Alamo) and connected theaters. The vocal minority who sent me death threats & prank calls today think this development can be stopped, amusingly, by shouting it down. posted to MetaFilter by anildashat 5:07 PM on August 8, 2013
The messages at the beginning of the movie also say that copying a movie online is just like stealing a car.
I've heard a lot of fine expressions of preference against any distraction at a movie. I've seen little acknowledgment that someone could, in good faith, not share that preference. posted to MetaFilter by anildashat 5:25 PM on August 8, 2013
kmz, I don't know where my personal line is - my behavior is always group one. But I have seen people interpreting that kind of thing as no big deal at all, and others lose their minds.
Not trolling about the pre-show warnings, just saying we all pick & choose which to heed based on our cultural norms. posted to MetaFilter by anildashat 5:32 PM on August 8, 2013
lalex, I wrote the piece in about 20 minutes. I spent months researching immigration policy and Zuckerberg's political action committee for a piece about the risks and opportunities of immigration policy, and distiller it into an easily digestible set of actions we cold all do. That's what I shared as broadly as possible. The self righteous folks in this thread were more interested in complaining about talking at movies.
I absolutely have been trying to get attention --... [more] posted to MetaFilter by anildashat 7:08 PM on August 8, 2013
(But hey, he should know this after all the lusers he's permabanned from his various web projects.)
I've literally never banned anybody from any website in my life, Mark. This is as inaccurate as your repeated attempts to take credit for LiveJournal's existence. posted to MetaFilter by anildashat 6:58 AM on August 9, 2013
I assume OUR cultural norms are going to be followed when I’m engaged in OUR culture. Who is "our" here?
I don't presume anyone's ever heard of me or anything I've done; I just know people who do know me on MeFi are aware they'll be rewarded for picking a silly lightweight post of mine rather than my more meaningful work. There's a hundred posts on Tumblr MeFi would disagree with, but if the same idea were from me, it's easier to get a lot... [more] posted to MetaFilter by anildashat 4:28 PM on August 9, 2013
So why would any of us want to read your more meaningful work?
You might not, that's fine. Why would you want to read only my least meaningful work, if you're going to read any? posted to MetaFilter by anildashat 5:25 PM on August 9, 2013
Huh, a dozen comments until "plain white background"? I woulda lost a $10 bet on that.
Kinda bummed I missed the "anal" jokes. posted to MetaFilter by anildashat 6:34 AM on July 19, 2013
To those noting these apply outside the Internet, I agree wholeheartedly; the list just reflects that I learned the lessons on the Internet. To those noting none of these ideas are particularly novel, I agree wholeheartedly, but just wanted to document what I'd learned. I didn't know who Robert Pirsig was until I Googled him, but it seems like he'd be a great guy to inadvertently plagiarize. posted to MetaFilter by anildashat 8:35 AM on July 19, 2013
"Actually, you've already changed. Into someone who suggests the end of our marriage and our family. Are you willing to do the work with me to repair things and talk about what's wrong in our marriage?" posted to Ask Metafilter by anildashat 9:19 AM on May 30, 2013
Attention white people: Racism is everywhere. It's everywhere. It's there in the quiet, unspoken background of conversations in liberal schools, it's in the out-loud rantings of near-strangers in big East Coast cities, it's in the board rooms and the backwaters.
That being said, NYC culture is to say things more directly, and New Yorkers tend to have more familiarity with people of other backgrounds and cultures than many other parts of the country... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by anildashat 9:16 AM on May 30, 2013
Gotham and Power Broker are two of my favorite books ever, so they're hard to top, but Manhattan in Maps is a great overview (a light read, given that it's mostly just maps and not very long) and of course Jane Jacobs' Death & Life of Great American Cities is a necessary addition to these fundamentals.
I also tend to have Kenneth Jackson's Encyclopedia of New York City open most of the time while (re-)reading these other books, and it's very readable on its own.... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by anildashat 10:13 AM on May 16, 2013 marked best answer
I may suggest that, in addition to listing the artists that have started or succeeded this way, you also contextualize the loss of character (and as mentioned above, business revenue) that will come from this loss as well. Because as much as I agree with your approach, it does somewhat presume that the folks making these rules already *care* about intangibles like hearing great music while strolling through a park, and most of them probably do not.
I sincerely love this layout, and it makes me wish people could suggest an image while writing a post for those of us who keep using this layout. What about showing this design to folks who've never visited the site? posted to MetaTalk by anildashat 10:23 PM on March 31, 2013
Not to rain on the parade, but this sort of isn't how the writing process for a sketch comedy show (or any mainstream TV show) works. Much of what writers are doing when pitching at SNL is trying to be the one whose sketch gets on air, preferably toward the front of the show, and to incidentally please their mercurial bosses while doing so.
Pop culture references (and mentions of popular YouTube videos are just that) certainly can help, because the material is familiar... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by anildashat 8:54 AM on March 8, 2013
These types of walls are effect examples of an implementation of the "arsenal of exclusion". Many of its precepts are described in this episode of the (great!) podcast 99% Invisible, including an example specific to the closing off of street access in a particular neighborhood to prevent undesirable (read: poor) people from getting access.
Some if the other tools in the arsenal are detailed in this Esquire article.... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by anildashat 9:14 PM on January 26, 2013 marked best answer
I'm much more thankful for the many interests my wife and I didn't share when we met; learning those through her perspective has been one if the great joys of our relationship for me. posted to Ask Metafilter by anildashat 5:54 AM on January 20, 2013
On a kitchen indispensability scale where 1 is a knife and 10 is a sous vide machine, the microplane is a 3 or 4. And yes, that price is too high. posted to Ask Metafilter by anildashat 5:48 AM on January 20, 2013
I am an extrovert and very comfortable in groups but basically only went to a handful of these events before I was into my 30s and married. I didn't miss anything by not going and never regret skipping them now. posted to Ask Metafilter by anildashat 9:12 PM on January 17, 2013
Congrats! You're ready to move out. Thank them, tell them that their generosity has made you comfortable to ask for help in the future if you need it, but that their example has made you disciplined enough that you won't need it, and then GTFO. posted to Ask Metafilter by anildashat 9:00 PM on January 17, 2013
You guys are the best. Thanks for putting up with all of us, and for all the stuff we'd only notice you doing if it broke down. posted to MetaTalk by anildashat 10:05 AM on January 9, 2013
Titles were not implemented for the benefit of the users who are members of the site and familiar with its workings and who know about (or even have access to) preferences to customize the site to their taste.
Not sure if that was the intent (I don't think the mods said that), but this old-ass user sure appreciates not having to click through to see titles. posted to MetaTalk by anildashat 10:59 AM on January 9, 2013
"New users from here on out aren't just going to accept titles, they're not going to be aware there's any other way."
New users aren't just going to accept that there's an "Ask MetaFilter", they're not going to be aware that the site's ever been any other way! Aaand... so what? posted to MetaTalk by anildashat 7:51 PM on January 9, 2013
Baking twine or kitchen twine usually costs about 10x per foot when compared to simple cotton cord intended for use in every other room of the house. posted to Ask Metafilter by anildashat 7:15 PM on January 9, 2013 marked best answer
To expand on Bugbread's thoughtful analysis a bit: If you're here in this thread, you are by definition not a typical MeFi user. Don't get defensive - that's not to say you don't matter or that you're not the beating heart of the sure or that your opinion isn't important.
But Matt and all the other mods have to represent and serve all users. Those who don't know MetaTalk exists. Those who know it exists but didn't notice a change. Those who noticed the change but don't... [more] posted to MetaTalk by anildashat 8:37 AM on January 8, 2013
I think a problem there, anil, is that the requirements you've stated are not all accepted by all members.
Yep, I'm happy to cede authority over the site's priorities to the people who've successfully run it for so long. But I'm sure if you had a strong reason one of those goals should be omitted, the mods would listen. I actually think that few people here have indicated disagreement with them, implementation aside. posted to MetaTalk by anildashat 8:48 AM on January 8, 2013
I can't read anil's comment without immediately recalling how badly SixApart snarfed up making changes with LiveJournal - and the dismissive reactions from SixApart that essentially boiled down to "we know better than you, the users who have been using this all the time for years - so accept our changes to this site you're so invested in & quit complaining already".
Eh, don't want to make this thread about me, but suffice to say, the reason I was a public... [more] posted to MetaTalk by anildashat 9:18 AM on January 8, 2013
You know what, Anil? Your little snarky comment about how none of the naysayers are giving useful feedback really fucking bothers me.
Then I hope you find some respite in the fact that I didn't say that, and that I specifically praised the mockups. This does sort of demonstrate the meta-issue of people responding to straw men here. I actually agree with much of the criticism about the relative weight and styling of the font choices, but I see on preview that you're... [more] posted to MetaTalk by anildashat 9:48 AM on January 8, 2013
My son is this age, and we play with his wooden train set every day. A few choice books that I treasure because they don't annoy me no matter how often we read them:
* Spoon and Chopsticks
* I Want My Hat Back and This Is Not My Hat
* Not a Box and Not a Stick
The thing to remember is that kids are really simple in their tastes — they don't care how much something cost or how elaborate it is;... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by anildashat 9:51 PM on January 1, 2013
One of my uncles is very wealthy, and has offered help. I don't feel good about asking for money directly, but I'm happy to ask for work. So that's my first line of defense.
Don't ask him for money or for help finding work at first -- have the first conversation be an outline of the issues you've listed here, and ask for his suggestions on how you tackle all of these related issues.
People who care about you, and who aren't facing the extreme... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by anildashat 9:39 PM on January 1, 2013 marked best answer
He seems to be forgetting that people in general - not tech-fascinated people like himself, but the general public - want things to be simple, intuitive, plug-and-play, and that's why they've gravitated to prefab commercial platforms.
From the piece: "The primary fallacy that underpins many of their mistakes is that user flexibility and control necessarily lead to a user experience complexity that hurts growth."
It blows my mind that... [more] posted to MetaFilter by anildashat 2:19 PM on December 13, 2012
Lots to respond to here, thought I'd just hit a few points.
I generally agree with his points, but every time I read the phrase "the social web" I threw up a little bit in the back of my throat. I wonder how he feels about leveraging synergies and monetizing the social cloud?
I am not a prescriptivist grammarian. People use these phrases because they have meaning and because they're signifiers of who one is speaking to and whether one... [more] posted to MetaFilter by anildashat 7:05 AM on December 14, 2012
I'm not arguing Wired is mainstream, just that my audience has broadened from the extremely insular folks who read my blog a decade ago. Lots of folks have responded to this piece with surprise about the fact that these things existed at all. There are plenty of tweets (or Hacker News comments, or whatever) from people who were unaware of these points.
Not sure how we got onto a tangent about Wired's demographics, but the fact this was considered linkworthy at all seems... [more] posted to MetaFilter by anildashat 7:40 AM on December 14, 2012
The Ace Hotel is generally overcrowded and insufferable. The NYPL reading room is great.
You should also shop through the list of privately-owned public spaces for central midtown and east midtown to find locations that suit your preferences; Each of those links to maps of the spots, and some even have photos of the venues.
The ones coded as "destinations" like Park Avenue Plaza or 590 Madison should suit your needs.... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by anildashat 10:08 PM on November 14, 2012
As a cis-male I don't have too much to add except that if you've found a pant that you like and that works from Zara, GET MORE OF THEM! I know it sounds obvious, but I screw this up all the time, thinking somehow I have to only get one of an item I like, when instead I should seize those rare times that clothing suits me and stock up.mthis is more acute for men as our off-the-rack options in a given season are generally less varied than for those who wear women's clothing.... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by anildashat 7:27 PM on October 13, 2012
Wow! Had no idea you guys had a space like this. I'd reach out to a few key event planning folks (Ruthless Bunny's link is obviously a good start) and just let them know you're available; Good venues in Manhattan are so rare and it's so unusual to find one that's not constantly been used for other events that I have to imagine there'll be tons of demand. The tech industry is *always* looking for spaces like this; Maybe come by one of our NY Tech Meetups and let people know what you've got going... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by anildashat 9:32 PM on October 2, 2012
Is Dash known to be hostile to Apple? Because this is a fairly devastating thing to say:
No, I like and use a lot of Apple products, and I think my wife bought a bunch of Apple stock a while back, so you know, if I have a bias it's probably in favor of Apple. Really I'm just skeptical of all multibillion-dollar publicly-traded companies.
Also, being called "Dash" makes me feel like I'm a grown-up or a... [more] posted to MetaFilter by anildashat 11:44 AM on September 20, 2012