my dog seems to like munching on ice cubes in the summer but not the winter.
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 10:20 PM on July 24, 2008

have her do one that is the full color (if it is in color) and one that is just the black outline. the tattoo artist will copy the black line drawing to be transfered to her skin and can use the color version for reference when filling in.
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 1:55 PM on July 21, 2008

yeah, every quote i've gotten for things in the past (there is, thankfully, a discount shop in my town) has always been ridiculous and a complete racket.
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 8:32 PM on July 19, 2008

where are you located? is there a good cheese shop in your town? an upscale grocery store? a whole foods or similar? all of those have great cheese selections and people on hand who really know their cheeses.
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 8:07 PM on July 19, 2008

definitely sorabol if you want KBQ but i also love bewon if you want to get a little fancier. the prix fixe is damned good.
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 12:26 AM on July 19, 2008

yeah, not sure why you hadn't cancelled the check at some point along the way…?
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 12:29 PM on July 16, 2008

so you gave someone a wad of cash without any paperwork?
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 12:33 PM on July 16, 2008

I think you should ask her husband for some money behind her back, with knowing head nods towards how insane she's been acting lately.

Horrifically condescending. She's an adult, not a 3-year-old. Do not do this.

except that she's likely to react like a 3-yr-old if she doesn't get her way.

(and not that i think you should follow the above advice either.)
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 1:57 PM on July 15, 2008

it's normal to miss your SO when they are away, but it's unhealthily needy when it's affecting her this much for absences of a only couple days at a time. hell, my fella is gone pretty much the entire work-week, nearly every week for work and i only see him on the weekends and i: just. have. to. deal. with. it. but then again, i have my work, my friends, and our dogs to keep me occupied. i can understand the fear of abandonment type thing due to family issues but…aye…well,... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 5:35 PM on July 11, 2008

Any tips on finding out whether a massage parlor is seedy or not?

spas or salons who have massage therapists are legit, as are individual practicing LMTs (licensed massage therapist). there are also usually massage therapists in holistic centers that might offer yoga and things of that nature as well.
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 12:44 PM on July 11, 2008

ornament.
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 10:01 PM on July 10, 2008

what delfina said in terms of feeding your dogs, if this is a question about that.

otherwise from what i have heard from other raw feeders, you will need to get a meat grinder to do the bones.
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 12:58 PM on July 10, 2008

raw bones are perfectly safe for dogs. i've never had any qualms about giving mine raw bones. just never cooked bones. your plan for necks and teeth sound fine. raw bones are a great addition to their diet.

if you want a way to keep her teeth clean naturally, i'd suggest getting her a big bone to chew on. raw, of course. i buy mine buffalo knuckles but you can get any big raw beef or similar bone from your butcher. i've given my dog these bones to chew on since he was a... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 1:51 PM on July 10, 2008

Oh and please, please, please do not give your dog a bone to chew on for her teeth as recommended above, especially from a large ungulate's legs or feet!! These bones are very very dense from supporting the massive bulk of the creature. They are much, much too dense for the dog's teeth to break, and hence they chew and gnaw at the bone. This is a lovely recipe for broken teeth and a trip to the vet for an extraction.

i know many many owners who do as... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 3:05 PM on July 10, 2008

there are many links you can google that will recommend chewing on raw bones to keep teeth clean:

here's one

and another

and another
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 3:19 PM on July 10, 2008

2nding unexpected.

if he really loves and cares for you, he wouldn't be dating other girls.

leave and do not have any kind of relationship with him. sheesh.
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 9:06 AM on July 10, 2008

However I'm going to go against the grain here and just suggest that sometimes, when coming out of a long relationship, or a series of bad ones, people *just don't want the formality of a relationship*.

i think this is only valid if they aren't dating other people. i mean, the fella i've been seeing the past four months are essentially in a relationship (calls, spend most of our weekends together, i watch his dog during the week,... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 9:15 AM on July 10, 2008

Notsnot - you are correct, so i should probabaly wait till labor day.....

what? what kind of logic is this? it's not a summer fling to you. you obviously want more. why stay in it and get even more emotionally involved because of some arbitrary end of summer date? wtf?

get. out. now.
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 10:20 AM on July 10, 2008

Thank You all though for the advice, but i am pretty sure what my decision will be.

if you had already made up your mind, what were you hoping to get out of askme? sounds like you pretty much came on here hoping to hear what you wanted to hear and when you heard overwhelming advice to the contrary, you decided to ignore it. twice. i'm sort of thinking we'll get this question again in another month or so.
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 3:00 PM on July 10, 2008

the "honeymoon" phase of every relationship (when the two of you are all lovey-dovey and super-affectionate and can't get enough of each other, etc) lasts from a few weeks to several months so it just might be that the two of you are moving out of that—particularly as it seems that you've spent more than the average amount of time together that most couples do at 3+ months. it's also pretty normal considering your ages that your relationship has been on a faster trajectory.... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 3:06 PM on July 3, 2008

As xo said, sometimes a guy only has eyes for his love. Mine is like that, four years in.

just want to point out that just because a man isn't making a comment about the hotness of a woman doesn't mean he doesn't notice or isn't looking at said hotness. i think for the most part, when a guy is in a relationship, he's pretty discreet about looking at attractive women. but obviously there are guys out there who are either clueless, cruel, or insecure... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 4:43 PM on July 3, 2008

what he does when you ask him not to

not to comment that is.
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 4:45 PM on July 3, 2008

Yeah, but honestly there are guys that don't find "hot women" pretty.

sure, "pretty" can be subjective. and just cause they look doesn't mean they want to do anything about it (i.e. hit on) but don't delude yourself: might not be your stereotypical "hot" woman, but they still notice what they are attracted to—otherwise, how would he have noticed you?
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 4:11 PM on July 9, 2008

google narcissism.
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 4:07 PM on July 9, 2008

i wouldn't really consider 1.5 hours a long distance relationship. that said, if he's doubling his salary, would he not be able to afford a car?
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 9:22 AM on July 7, 2008

i agree that a four month gap doesn't need to be addressed in your cover letter. if you are qualified for the position, they might ask you about it—and i agree with those who say you should be honest and say you had to deal with a family situation that has now been resolved and that you are looking forward to getting back to work.
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 5:51 PM on July 3, 2008

mayonnaise and fries. but the fries have to be the thin, crispy euro-type. or mcdonald's fries.
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 3:26 PM on July 3, 2008

--To the suggestions about skipping periods entirely, this has always kind of scared me, and I've never tried it. It somehow seems unhealthy, though I couldn't say why.

this is an irrational and unfounded fear. in fact, i'm really amazed that you would still feel this despite the abundance of evidence out there to the contrary. if you have a problem trusting a bunch of strangers on the interwebs, you can ask your doctor. i have no doubt that s/he... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 3:21 PM on July 3, 2008

i like the idea of a park bench somewhere on the property. maybe in the garden?
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 12:36 PM on July 2, 2008

J.Crew has a great selection of summer weight suits as well as some year round suiting. the linen suit is nice as is that classic summer suit, the seersucker (and my personal favorite). there is also a chino suit which Banana Republic also has.
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 11:19 PM on July 1, 2008

sorry, forgot you mentioned you won't be able to iron/press so the linen and chino suits won't do. in which case, definitely go with the seersucker.
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 11:20 PM on July 1, 2008

scblackman: I'm looking for answers to my question not life lessons. As a physician, under what conditions have you been prompted to administer narcotic medication. When does a patient need it? Under what circumstances is it necessary?

scblackman's answer makes it clear he's not going to answer that question given that in your post you admit to an addiction to vicodin and this seems to be the main drive for wanting more.... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 6:29 PM on July 1, 2008

you're still in college and you mention that you are not financially independent. you are bringing a guest into your parents' home. they get to make the rules—not you. you can let them know that you would like to be staying in the same room as your girlfriend but if they insist on separate rooms, well, you're SOL. it's their house, their rules. if you insist, you should then suck it up and pay for a hotel room.

(this is based on what i and all of my... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 5:22 PM on July 1, 2008

you are an adult, act like one. they must accept the fact that you have an adult relationship. they are kidding themselves if they think they can force you into separate rooms.

gnutron, this might fly if the OP wasn't financially dependent on his parents. but regardless, it's their house. do you feel entitled to go into someone's own house and dictate to them what the rules are? cause if you do, you've got a big set.
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 5:46 PM on July 1, 2008

…and therapy is completely out of the question for me.

why? because there seem to be deeply-rooted psychological issues at play here and to rule out therapy completely isn't doing you any favors in terms of getting what you want out of relationships.
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 2:05 PM on July 1, 2008

the way you have written an absolute refusal to therapy as well as your responses seem to indicate a resistance on your part, whether consciously or subconsciously, to really get to the bottom of your issues.

I was raised with sisters why would Í have anything against women...

one does not necessarily follow the other.

the things that you have said vis a vis your experience with women as well as the... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 2:21 PM on July 1, 2008

OP, i believe the reason almost everyone who's answered on this thread has suggested therapy is that because there was enough (or not enough) in your orig post and in your responses that have raised the kinds of flags that therapy—and not what a bunch of unqualified people on the interwebs—will help you with.
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 2:28 PM on July 1, 2008

Examples of the flaws I see:

* Not good looking enough
* Having a smile that exposes too much of the upper gums
* Always wanting to hold hands
* Getting fat
* Not having any money
* Being a bit dumb
* Terrible punctuation and a total unwillingness to learn to fix it

this was really interesting to me and immediately made me think of a very close friend i'd... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 3:11 PM on July 1, 2008

oh, and a few months after he came out, found the love of his life—who he hasn't picked apart.
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 3:13 PM on July 1, 2008

You say you are 'proud of her." Unless she discovered the cure for cancer or mediated peace between Israel and the Arabs, please leave that for your parents.

You and she are no longer kids. Your age difference is now meaningless, you are peers. Are you treating her like one? Would you say to a buddy, "I'm proud of you?"

i don't understand this. why wouldn't you tell your sibling, any other... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 5:13 PM on June 30, 2008

"Sis, I just want you to know that I am proud of you for how well you did in your life" well that is just so patronizing and condescending coming from an older sibling with whom the younger sibling had a difficult relationship.

i don't think telling someone you are proud of the way the person they've become is patronizing. i have a difficult, almost non-existent relationship with my older brother. if he ever came out and told me that—and... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 2:12 PM on July 1, 2008

nthing wondering what the cousin has to do with any of it. the name's already been in your family. if asked, all you need to say is that you were naming the child after your great aunt, whom you adored.
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 10:34 AM on June 30, 2008

same as all great relationships: chemistry.
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 10:12 AM on June 30, 2008

My question is what, precisely, causes the chemistry

oh, didn't see this. i don't think chemistry can be really explained. your relationship with each person is unique and the chemistry you share with each person is unique. what creates the chemistry for one friend or lover or whoever is going to be different from what creates it for another.
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 10:16 AM on June 30, 2008

i've always been adventurous and have had a lot of really fantastic sex with a several boyfriends past. but for some reason, the guy i'm dating now—we have the most insane crazy hot sex. like every single time. like the best sex ever for either of us—which is saying a lot for me. neither of us have any idea why. it's not like we are doing anything more or much different than what i've been doing in the past. i think this is one of those things, much like romantic... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 6:57 PM on June 27, 2008

"twelfth night"
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 9:42 PM on June 26, 2008

31??!! yeah, your life is definitely over so you should give up.

can people in their late 20s upwards stop acting like the fact that they haven't gotten hitched yet stop complaining about how it's already too late and they never will? for serious. your 30s are awesome (especially for you women)—embrace it.

that said, i think scrm has something. it sounds like you may be coming across as needy or desperate... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 10:41 AM on June 26, 2008

Forktine you have completely missed my point. i agree with everything you are saying but i still say it's a crapshoot. i've looked and found someone, i've not looked and found someone, i've not been looking and found someone and i've not been looking and not found someone. you can do everything and you can do nothing and you can do a measure in between but meeting someone we really click with depends on chance beyond our control.
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 12:32 PM on June 26, 2008

I also disagree with the crapshoot arguments. There are millions of men out there --

Flying Squirrel, you are missing the point as well. yeah, there are a million men out there—are you saying that the OP should just pick one of those million men just because they are lonely and she is lonely?

the way i see it, out of those million, how many people do you meet that you really click with? and what are your chances of meeting... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 9:30 PM on June 26, 2008

so here is the ultimate coincidence: while walking my dogs today, a young, cute little pit bull/am staff ran up and started playing with my two. there were some ppl walking behind us so i assumed she belonged to them and we'd walked a bit of a distance before i realized there were no longer ppl behind us and she obviously was not theirs. and when i brought her back to the block where she'd joined us and knocked on several doors, only one person claimed to have seen her being walked before but... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by violetk at 8:52 PM on June 26, 2008