Go for it, it is your life to live as you see fit if you are not a burden to anybody.

My younger brother took his "retirement" in bits and pieces, starting while he was in college. He would work for a while, save money, then he would travel the world until the money was gone. Then back to work for a while. He trades books and paper goods at shows and on the internet, and never really used his degree in the biological sciences.

He... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 1:26 PM on June 29, 2008

(I'm a liberal immigrant parent)

Have you thought of a formal engagement (with a way off in the distance wedding) to test the waters? Their reactions might give the both of you a clue on what to do, and it might make your living together more palatable to them.

My gut feeling answer is for you to try your best to keep the subterfuge, to the point of inventing some temporary problem in your appartment if you get caught.... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 6:27 PM on June 25, 2008

Hospice, hospice, hospice: they are caring people, they have been through many times, they know the words to say and how to help the dying, they know the breaking point of the family members.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 2:24 PM on June 21, 2008

Seven Minutes White Icing (it requires a double boiler)

2 unbeaten egg whites
5 tablespoons of cold water (split as you like between water and liqueur)
1 1/2 cups of sugar
Bring the water in the bottom part of a double-boiler to a boil. Add all the ingredients in the top part. Beat continuously for seven minutes with a portable electric mixer. It will look shiny with soft peaks.

It will stay soft for few hours, but turn meringue-like later.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 2:14 PM on June 21, 2008

I agree with all who said that is a question of trust and not of sexuality. I sincerely hope your fiancee is able to overcame your lapse and forgive you. I recommend a very humble apology.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 2:06 PM on June 21, 2008

Confront him before the wedding, not alone, tell him you remember him molesting you and requesting him to stay away from you at the wedding. I agree with AV about the alcohol not wiping memories ( unless you are well into DT and pickled brain): he is not facing up to the facts or he is justifying it to himself with the reason that you wanted it or were a willing participant.

An official looking letter, special delivery, could work, but telling him off in person would... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 1:46 PM on June 21, 2008

Anedoctal, but think of the places such as Italy or France, where moderate alcohol consumption is a daily event: they do not seem to have more unhealthy babies than the US.

This review paper on the effects of alcohol seems to present an opposite view than the paper linked by Blazecock.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 4:46 PM on June 14, 2008

To wear on special occasions, I gave my husband gold cufflinks and tie clasp. I also had to buy a shirt with french cuffs because all of his had buttons.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 4:05 AM on June 10, 2008

I have Social Choice fund from CREF as one of the alternatives offered by the University for which I work and, compared to the regular stock, it always underperform.

I get a little bit cranky every quarter, but it is the way of life I have chosen.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 3:09 PM on June 7, 2008

Try:
C.J. Cherryh Cyteen
Sharon Lee and Steve Miller Liaden Universe
Orson Scott Card Ender

I have enjoyed all three.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 7:01 PM on June 4, 2008

I do not think you are fucked up in your sense of self: you seem to have a clear idea of whom you like, and what attributes they should possess in order for you to like them. Chemistry between two human beings counts, and it is not always based on beauty.

The thing that troubles me is that I remember having a conversation about my preferences in a partner only once in my life, and that was over 40 years ago, when I was in high school. Maybe people do not talk about what... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 6:43 PM on June 4, 2008

I love to do that too:

1. pot roast cooked in beer with roasted veggies on the side (potatoes, carrots, onions, turnips, rutabagas, etc)
2. Beef pot pie, with creamy peas. carrots, mushrooms and leeks
3. Chipped beef on toast, using wathever is left over, plus some salty dried beef.

another trio with ham

1. baked ham with asparagus and sweet potatoes
2. ham kabobs (with pineapple,... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 10:42 AM on June 2, 2008

Ha! I never have lefovers with a pork shoulder in the slow cooker. I make pulled pork bbq and my husband and son pig it down until is gone.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 12:42 PM on June 2, 2008

dersins- that is why I called them pigs. They really get carried away with pork bbq, and it is nothing really special, since I use bottled sauce.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 7:08 PM on June 2, 2008

charlesv- that is really stretching a chicken!
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 7:10 PM on June 2, 2008

Lets not forget the "in a closed system" thingy.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 6:12 PM on May 31, 2008

I have looked for a friend on the possibilities of a librarian job here in Oklahoma City: the difference in pay between a master degree and a college diploma in library science is only $1.25 per hour. Of course there might be differences in hiring practices.
I would go for the master degree: usually people regret not having done something.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 4:50 PM on May 26, 2008

Here a link to the msds (material safety data sheet) on mineral oil. It seems rather innocuous. In one lab I worked, I used it to restore an old stone lab bench. It did a superb job of cleaning and shining stone. It was also used as a sealer in PCR (polymerase chain reaction) tubes.

Forgive the spelling out: I'm very acronym challenged and I tend to assume other people are too.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 9:58 PM on May 21, 2008

The answer that comes to mind is "soil mechanics" but I'm not an engineer or architect.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 3:54 PM on May 18, 2008

Second that, but use distilled water or bottle water: I had trouble with the ends rotting when I tried to use tap water.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 2:34 PM on May 18, 2008 marked best answer

I second the boric acid capsules. After a bad, long bout of recurring yeast infections, my doctor suggested the boric acid capsules to follow fluconazole treatment. It cleared up the yeast infections completely and for years!
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 2:39 PM on May 15, 2008

I'm full of envy!

Funghi Trifolati
Soak the morels in salted water to clean, rinse well, dry and chop.
In a skillet melt 2 tablespoons of butter, add 2 tablespoons of olive oil. Add 2 tablespoons of chopped garlic (I know it is a lot), and the morels. Cook on low heat for 15 minutes, then add 1/4 cup of minced parsley. Salt and pepper to taste.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 2:45 PM on May 11, 2008

My husband replaced the spiral thingy in a couple of windows, and it did not seem too hard. He got the parts at a storm window installer shop: they might be more willing to help you out.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 10:56 AM on May 11, 2008 marked best answer

Type 2 diabetes imay cause peripheral neuropathy. I did a quick PubMed search but I was not able to find any article linking beer and neuropathy.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 1:55 PM on May 10, 2008

When my firstborn was diagnosed in the gifted and talented category these are the recommendations I was given on raising a well-adjusted child:

1. Make sure he is competent in one sport (competent, not excellent) preferably a team sport.

2. Make sure he is able to perform ( either play an instrument, dance, gymnastic, sing, draw etc...)

3. Make sure he has a social network of peers (through church, school, scouts etc.)... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 12:00 PM on May 9, 2008 marked best answer

How old are they? Even as recently as ten years ago, I would find busy work if there was not real work to do. No longer: as I approach retirement, if there is no work I goof off ( not to the extent of 32 hours a week).
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 5:55 PM on May 6, 2008

Do they have any redeeming qualities?

"I don't like uncle Bill gossiping about aunt Tara, but he is such a generous man toward the needy that I forgive him most of the time" or "Aunt Tara thinks that homosexuals are all sinners, but she is too old to be corrected: we still need to be loving and polite to her"

goes a long way in teaching the kind of behavior you expect from your children and teaching tolerance at the same... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 4:57 PM on May 6, 2008

I bought a leather couch from a local furniture store and the store gave me some cleaning and feeding lotions for it (that they refill for free when necessary!). You might want to talk to the staff of a furniture store in your city for advice.

I'm also thinking of shoe polish: maybe you can tray it on a small area. You would have to buff extra hard to make sure that nothing transfer to clothes.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 5:43 PM on May 4, 2008

Have your new doctor's office request all your records and reports from the old doctor: it works faster this way. A doctor's request is rarely ignored or put off.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 3:03 PM on May 2, 2008

what is the elegant opposite of deluded?
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 12:53 PM on May 2, 2008

gizmodo had one of their battlemodo for ipod docking station last summer. The winner was one of the less expensive models! Price does not seem to mean much.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 5:13 PM on April 29, 2008

It might be universal: my husband, who is american of german/irish descent, smiles in the most inappropriate situations. He has struggled all his life to control this impulse, since he has been berated repeatedly.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 5:01 PM on April 29, 2008

My impression from what you says is also bipolar, and I second the advice of Sondrialiac to set up an appointment with a therapist now, when you feel well.

Just describe what you went through, and your worries: the therapist will take it from there. The most important thing is to develop a good relationship with somebody in the health care field who will be able to help you if and when you need help.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 5:30 PM on April 21, 2008

Fill a complain form with your state board of medical licensure and supervision.
All complains are reviewed.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 9:50 PM on April 15, 2008

Saffron risotto with tomatoes
Use your usual proportions of ingredients, minus the chicken and spinach. To the stock add enough saffron to make a nice dark yellow. Proceed as usual, and when almost done, add 2 cups of fresh roma tomatoes, seeded and cubed. Sprinkle with a lot of Parmigiano or grana padano before serving.

Anchovies risotto
Use your usual proportions of ingredients, minus the chicken and spinach. Dissolve two tablespoons of anchovy... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 7:08 PM on April 15, 2008

Diluted bleach should do the job. I disinfect my wood cutting boards with a 10% bleach solution, letting it sit for half an hour. Rinse well after that.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 5:21 PM on April 14, 2008

Reading fiction actually is very helpful for general knowledge because you are exposed to cultures that are not your own. You learn other people mindsets and ways of life.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 5:13 PM on April 14, 2008

Move on. Good friendships usually develop by being there for your friends through the hard times as well as the fun times. The two of you seem not to want to share the bad times.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 6:44 AM on April 13, 2008

I throw away the soak water too, unless I already have rinsed the beans well before soaking. The amount of water left after cooking really depends on the beans and varies from batch to batch: some beans absorb more, some less. If you feel the gravy is too watery, remove some liquid during the last 30 minutes of cooking and raise the temperature slightly.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 3:01 AM on April 13, 2008

You know yourself best, but the personal price you are going to pay if you sue might be too high. Think carefully on what kind of relationship you want with your family first.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 2:09 PM on April 11, 2008

You can do it: go for it. The standing of your advisor is important for your future job, especially if a prolific writer or consulted peer reviewer, and published in journals relevant to your field. I do not think the additional loan is that much.

Think of it this way: you have much more control on your own time without a stipend. My daughter was awarded one, and I swear she is working 80 hours per week, plus her coursework.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 1:57 PM on April 11, 2008

Four or five years, when my daughter finished college and had yet to find a job, we got singles insurance for her with BlueCross/Shields. It had a high deductible and cost us around $150 per month. The rates depend on your state and personal info.

We also increased the medical on the car insurance. You should not need travel insurance if you have health insurance.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 1:06 PM on April 6, 2008

The Power and the Glory by Graham Greene
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 9:11 PM on April 5, 2008 marked best answer

#5, centralization of communication and transportation seems widespread in some parts of Europe
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 6:32 PM on April 1, 2008

Compost heap. While diluting and adding beans or pasta is a very good idea, this would require additional cooking, and overcooked cabbage is not particularly appetizing.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 3:16 PM on March 29, 2008

My son in law gave his groomsmen art. He bought not very expensive canvas work from young artists, and the gifts were appreciated. A local University or Community College teacher should be able to direct you to good young artists.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 10:44 AM on March 28, 2008

I'm a peon in a molecular genetics lab.

My favorite way to keep up is going to national or regional meetings, my least favorite is reading journals because there is an amazing amount of atrocious work out there.

For each test, the lab participate in the "College of American Pathologists" proficiency testing, which keeps every lab in the USA on its respective toes in order not to loose the licence to operate.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 10:36 AM on March 28, 2008

I have cork flooring in the kitchen and I love it.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 12:06 PM on March 24, 2008

Possibly it was undercooked: most recipes I have require a temperature of 155 to 160 degrees before taking it out of the oven. It does go up 10 or 15 degrees while standing. Juices should run clear.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 12:03 PM on March 24, 2008

Inevitable Illusions by Massimo Piatelli-Palmerini. I tried unsuccesfully to find a link. I liked the book and it was on how easy it is to fool the mind and think illogically. Easy to read, if you can find it.
posted to Ask Metafilter by francesca too at 2:17 PM on March 23, 2008