This happens to me often, and all of the above suggestions are excellent. The deep belly breathing is perhaps the most effective because it gets you to calm down right away - you get much more oxygen to the brain when you breathe in through your nose and it really calms you. A good, hard run helps out too.

On a follow up note, I recommend seeing a counselor. Anxiety can be very debilitating and often pops up in situations where you need to be steady and relaxed.... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 6:19 AM on June 8, 2008

I know you said no panniers, but the Axiom MacKenzie is pretty fantastic because it's a good size, waterproof, and it has a shoulder strap - you can zip in the bungee and what not, attach the shoulder strap and go!
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 2:02 PM on June 6, 2008

A good friend of mine did regular acupuncture - REALLY regular. Like two sessions a day for two weeks. Not only were her shakes under control, but it really helped her kick the habit and quick! She still goes once a week, and it's eight months later. Also, if AA didn't work for you, I would recommend counseling. A good therapist can work wonders.

Best of luck and take good care of yourself.
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 1:57 PM on June 6, 2008

So many of my favorite jazz albums have been listed here. But I will agree with juv3nal - find an album you like and track the line-up from that album. That's actually how I discovered Clifford Brown. He plays on Live at Birdland Volume 1 by Art Blakey and I went out and bought some of his albums and was blown away.

And I encourage you to buy original albums on CD or record. The liner notes are almost always worth it.

And some... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 12:45 PM on June 3, 2008

I agree with the Suzuki suggestions. This will help develop your child's ear for life, whether s/he continues with music or not. IA fine-tuned ear will help your child focus in general, and many other skills will come easier to him/her. I wish I had studied Suzuki Method as a child!!
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 12:41 PM on June 3, 2008

Rosebuddy is right on. Seriously, as a newcomer to the wide world of sex myself, foreplay is a must! Just as mostlymartha notes, did he get you warmed up, stretched out, and ready first? It makes a HUGE difference. And another thing: relax. Sometimes you just need to convince yourself to relax your muscles. When you're tense, it's more difficult. You know like when you go to the gyn and you have to relax during your exam? Same deal, just sexier and with a person instead of a metal... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 12:38 PM on June 3, 2008

While Austin is my favorite place in the world, it does not quite meet your financial needs. It is expensive and getting pricier by the year. I would live here forever if I could, but job prospects aren't that great and it is pricey. I should just move under a bridge on the Greenbelt. I digress...

So I am moving to Cleveland, Ohio (for a JOB, folks. I would not leave Austin unless it was absolutely necessary). It is on a big body of water (Lake Erie), it has... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 12:24 PM on June 3, 2008

OK, I'm not a big hand washer. (But I have a killer immune system and I attribute it to all the hand washing I DIDN'T do!) But my new boyfriend is. And he can't win all the time, but he'll mention it often enough (Hey honey, aren't you gonna wash your hands?) that I wash my hands more often now than I did before. He's not exactly nagging, but we're kind of meeting in the middle. I wash more often, he gets a (slightly) cleaner girlfriend more often. But it can't happen all the time, also... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 1:39 PM on June 1, 2008

I don't know, but I'd say if he's touchy about it, there may be something icky hiding there, something that he's uncomfortable with. It might be something simple, but it also might be something complicated. I think we can learn a lot about our partners' past relationships and how they talk about them. I like to know - not all the details, just if they had a positive relationship or not, the length of time, long distance or not, that kind of stuff. It has actually served me well in my current... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 1:33 PM on June 1, 2008

Vinegar AND baking soda. Let it bubble for a little bit and then scrub with a soft brush.
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 7:38 AM on May 31, 2008 marked best answer

The same thing that happened to frumious bandersnatch happened to me. I was happily bebopping along in my lovely single, healthy life and BOOM! he just fell in my lap. Of course I had a bit of a freakout (in my head, anyway), but now we are SO happy. And this is after five years of (happy) singledom.

Have you considered that maybe the timing IS right? That all your recent "one-on-one with you" time has resulted in you being ready for this person right now?... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 7:21 AM on May 30, 2008

Mine does too. And sometimes I do it intentionally after sitting on a hard surface for a while (especially in grad school seminars). I've never had any pain associated with it, and my elbows and back pop too, so I think it's just a joint thing, no big deal. But then again, I'm no chiropractor. :)
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 7:35 AM on May 29, 2008

Put a book on the far end of a towel and pull the towel toward you with your toes. Repeat. This is fantastic for your tendons and muscles around the 5th metatarsal.
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 5:52 AM on May 29, 2008

GO OUTSIDE. Swim, bike, run. People watch. Thrift store shopping. Playing with the puppies at the pound. Read a book in a park. Wander through my city (on foot or bike). Call old friends. Make collages to send to old friends. Rearrange my furniture. Paint a wall in my house. Pretend I know how to garden and garden. Cook some elaborate meal for myself. Re-organize my closet. Run again. Swim again. Make PB&J sandwiches and hand them out to bums on the street.
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 10:55 AM on May 27, 2008

What about a random, new city you've never visited before? Chicago or Seattle or Philadelphia or New Orleans? Each of these cities has neat museums, cool parks, some outdoorsy stuff where your kids can hike a bunch or just get tired from walking around all day and also great food.
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 10:49 AM on May 27, 2008

Not to be snarky or anything, but maybe quit school and do something that would be more interesting and engaging for you - fun job, long vacation, et. You'd save money on tuition AND booze. That way, you could booze it up on the weekends with your friends and really enjoy it. It seems like a waste of time and money if you find college so boring. And maybe a smidge disrespectful to your professors and classmates. Not entirely related to your initial question, but my two (if a bit snarky)... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 6:20 AM on May 27, 2008

I think you need to strengthen your core: more ab and lower back work will help support that upper back region. I think yoga or pilates could do you good because they both strengthen and stretch,
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 4:13 AM on May 21, 2008

My grandmother lived to be 82, and she was completely independent, driving and working until shortly before she died. She often said that she was tired of living, but I think that was loneliness; she outlived two children, her husband, her best friends, and her sisters. But she was lots of fun to be around. She was sassy and witty and loved random trips to the beach or a bar or an art market.

My friend Jody is 79 and travels the world about three times a year: the... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 3:31 AM on May 15, 2008

OK, let me start off with you're a bit young to really let this weigh you down. 22 is WAY young (and I say this as a single (but dating) 29 year-old who is close to your position with similar views on having children, in a relationship with someone who eventually wants children, etc.) to think about this whole thing. Settle into a job, see where the relationship goes (since you are at least open to the idea of kids) and relax for a minute.

Fear of giving birth: Yeah,... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 11:20 AM on May 11, 2008 marked best answer

Thanks to all of you! These sites are a terrific start! I'm a little overwhelmed (but in a good way). Thanks tons!
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 10:54 AM on May 10, 2008

Warning: anecdotal response...

I don't know about specific resources, but my parents were pretty great about enrolling me in science, art, and language classes at local museums (like the Exploratorium in SF and the Science Museum in St. Paul) and non-profits. I've since lost my "gifted' capabilities, but when I was younger, I took the advanced (gifted, like Project Search) classes in school, was given lots of books and a shiny new library card, and got to explore... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 11:23 AM on May 9, 2008

I, too, think you lack confidence in yourself. Speak up! Stand tall! Look people in the eye! Actively participate in conversations! You are shy, and this will be difficult at first, but take it one step at a time. Start by giving yourself a goal for this next week: I WILL add what I think to a conversation in the teacher's lounge. The week after, try it twice. Then maybe try to start a conversation yourself with a colleague, etc. This will help address your anxiety a bit.... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 11:17 AM on May 9, 2008

Give it to her on the actual day! It'll make the day that much more special.
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 7:49 AM on May 8, 2008

yeah, but still. there's that whole suspense thing anyway. and since it's just the two of y'all, might as well wait, have some cake and fun.
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 8:05 AM on May 8, 2008

I agree with jeanmari. I am a theist, but I have a hard time with the church and the Bible. Both things have become so warped due to greed, power, and intolerance that I look for God in other things, mainly my wonderful circle of friends and my beautiful city. Seriously, just going for a long run on Sunday mornings makes me more aware of God and all this nice stuff he put into motion. Faith sucks. It's hard. Mostly because life sucks. But it can be great, too. But remember, it's that... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 8:00 AM on May 8, 2008

The Menil Collection is free and ASTOUNDING. It's an amazing collection of surrealist art.
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 6:35 AM on May 8, 2008

Oh, and it's right next to the Rothko Chapel. An absolutely incredible space.
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 6:36 AM on May 8, 2008

There are SO many NYC transplants here! You're going to love it. I am (very sadly) leaving it soon.

Chronicle: best newspaper
Craigslist: best apt finder & furniture finder
Showlistaustin.com: best listing of live shows now now now.

Texas Monthly is a Texas magazine, so it covers the whole state, but it's a great, well-written, left-leaning thing with great discussion on Texas politics and art. I dig it.
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 10:38 AM on May 7, 2008

Just another two cents.

KISS HER, for crying out loud!!!!
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 10:34 AM on May 7, 2008

As someone also in her late 20s who comes from a tiny family that only gets smaller as the years go by (all that's left is my dad, my brother, and an estranged aunt and uncle), my friends are my world. My friends are my family. My friends do the things that family is supposed to do: provide that unconditional love and support no matter what.

Because I value friendships so much, I used to put stock in every bit of friendship chemistry with any person I met. That is... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 10:30 AM on May 7, 2008

Well, I was one of those children exposed (sparingly) to freakishly negative family members. My mom made it clear to me that no matter what other people did or said at these gatherings, I was to be on MY best behavior (a mantra of my mom's: the only one who can control your behavior is YOU) and treat people as I wanted to be treated. I slipped into a cousin's habit of swearing one year, and my mom didn't punish me exactly, but she let me know how disappointed she was in me. That guilt was... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 1:33 PM on May 6, 2008

Estaba riquisimo! (estaba rikIsimo) - It was delicious!
Estoy llena (estoi yeina) - I'm full.
Ya comí antes (same pronunciation) - I already ate.
Ya he comido mucho! (ya A comeedo mucho) - I´ve already eaten tons.

Suerte! (Good luck!)
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 9:02 AM on May 6, 2008

Whoa! Muscle vs. endurance. Both involve strength. And then there's pain threshold. Women tend to have better endurance and a higher pain threshold. This is just plain dumb (no offense to your girlfriend) because it is so stinkin' subjective. I think being fit is being healthy and active, both mentally and physically. You can't compare. It's apples and oranges, turtles and chickens. It's kind of like saying women are more attractive than men, or women are smarter than men or vice versa.... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 4:59 AM on May 6, 2008

Slow down! Relax! Don't try to hard!

And then run over to JackRabbit to get fitted for shoes. They will watch your gait, determine if you underpronate or overpronate, and they will give you lots of tips (like don't lift your arms too high - your thumbs should be grazing your hips; think tall and you won't slouch or lean when you run; breathe easy). You need good shoes and professional advice.

Next, go to craigslist or some other networking... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 4:00 PM on May 5, 2008 marked best answer

I think you're carrying too much stuff. Dry socks? That seems excessive. So do the bandaids. Use body glide for those areas that chafe or blister for preventative medicine, and change your socks when you finish running. Unless you're running in a downpour, sweaty feet are sweaty feet and that's just the way the mop flops. For socks, I LOVE thorlos. They seem to wick sweat and they're super comfortable. Bagel? No, just have a slice of toast with peanut butter and honey before you head... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 3:43 PM on May 5, 2008 marked best answer

OK, first of all, there needs to be clear, CRYSTAL CLEAR communication between you and your husband about your life goals. This will be a difficult (if not impossible) process if you do not have constant support. He needs to be your rock right now, accompanying you to see a nutritionist, to the gym (yes, the gym. Weights and swimming will help you out tremendously and you can do both without your legs), and to the organic, fresh produce at the grocery store.

Basically,... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 10:35 AM on May 5, 2008

I think it's the salt too. I don't drink V8, but I do consume (as holgate suggests) an oral re hydration formula (12 parts sugar, 1 part salt, lemon juice [to taste], 1 liter water), especially after a long run. It kicks in instantly. (I find that V8 has too much sodium for my taste.)
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 8:46 AM on May 5, 2008

I thought my current boyfriend was cute, but not necessarily super sexy. But he has a great heart, he's very intelligent, witty, and fun to be around. And he treats me very well. After a few more dates, the sex appeal grew. And grew. And it kept growing, even though he wasn't necessarily what I had in my head as my ideal body type for a partner (as unrealistic and societally scary as yours: a tall, cut, athletic body). You might be putting a block against a particular body type without... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 4:31 PM on May 4, 2008

Yeah, I'll go ahead and poop on you from a moderate height, jannw (but in the most respectful, metafiltery way possible), because exercise is not always the key to a smokin' bod. (And I do not say this as a pudgy 21 year old; I say this as a very fit, lean 29 year old. So you know it's not a personal defensive thing.) Some people do not have the physical capacity to be long and lean. Genes, thyroids, bone structure, stress, depression...there are a million reasons why someone might be 21 and... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 8:39 AM on May 5, 2008

Chocolatl and tokay (and a few kinds of wine) from the His Dark Materials trilogy by Philip Pullman. And then there's a whole mess of drinks from Star Wars.
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 4:13 PM on May 4, 2008

Actually, that's true. He often has urinary tract infection problems and his super expensive Prescription Diet stuff is what keeps them at bay. Excellent point!
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 3:39 PM on May 2, 2008

These are all wonderful pearls of wisdom, and I thank all of you! I will be speaking with her using a combination of the above suggestions AND I will be putting a collar on him. He's too great of a cat to let him get catnabbed (or napped). Thanks a bunch!
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 7:45 AM on May 3, 2008

First of all, you should never increase your mileage dramatically from one week to the next. Maintain easy, "recovery" runs between hard workouts and try to give your body a day's rest (regardless) between runs.

Second of all, it depends on what kind of knee problems you are having. Does it hurt on the kneecap? Does it hurt below and to the left of the knee? Does it hurt or throb? These are important questions to ask, because you may be suffering from an... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 6:39 PM on April 30, 2008

4thing yoga. You can get videos and do it within the comfort of your own home. The best bit about yoga is it really strengthens your CORE. This will help you be able to lift even more, go even further, etc. It is (mostly) good for your joints (don't do anything that is painful) and improves flexibility.
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 11:26 AM on April 29, 2008

Put an open box of baking soda in a secure place to absorb old odors, clean that sucker out and then make little sachets (read: mesh bags with yummy smelling stuff in them) and distribute them throughout the car (including in your stinky shoes).

I live in Texas where rosemary grows by the bushel at every street corner and I made little rosemary sachets out of old pillowcases and put them in the pockets behind the seats, in the glove compartment, under the seats, and in... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 11:20 AM on April 29, 2008

Not that you need someone else to correct the spelling, but just for extra emphasis I'll go ahead and second or third that it's castEllano. And I think perceptions of the differences between castellano and español depends not only on the country but also on the region. I have lived extensively in both Spain and Peru, and I have several friends from Argentina, Colombia, Cuba, Puerto Rico, and Chile. In the upper Amazon of Peru, people refer to it formally as castellano. I also speak with a... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 10:00 AM on April 29, 2008

Health Alliance for Austin Musicians. Many New Orleansian musicians have been displaced to nearby Austin, Texas and millions of dollars a year are generated from the Austin live music scene. It's a fantastic organization.
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 6:10 AM on April 28, 2008 marked best answer

30 minutes a day. That's the key to get going. It's only 30 minutes, it's only half an hour. Just make yourself sit at the computer for 30 minutes a day, no matter what, and write stuff. Bad text is better than no text, as my advisor says, and it's easier to edit than it is to generate. Be honest: "I'm sorry, I've been under the weather and I haven't been motivated. I have a plan now, and I am ready to get into gear." Remember, your advisor has advised many students, and is... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 6:07 AM on April 28, 2008

My elbows have always clicked like that when I do push-ups, but my left elbow will often click just for no particular reason at all after straightening it. I've often wondered what it is, and I hope I don't get bursitis or some crazy arthritis when I get older. My elbows have done that for years, and I haven't had a problem yet.
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 7:50 PM on April 27, 2008 marked best answer

I love the Chocolate War, so I'll second that. But also check out the short story "The Loneliness of the Long Distance Runner" by Allan Sillitoe.
posted to Ask Metafilter by cachondeo45 at 4:22 PM on April 26, 2008