July 25, 2002

7:44 AM

When Rock bands leave their irony at home (or potentially never had any). An outrageously hilarious collection of musicians taking incredibly self-concious photographs of themselves. All of my fellow musicians on metafilter, you will find this particularly hilarious (and cringe-worthy, as you wait to see if the next pic will be...you!)
posted by glenwood (53 comments total)

I like this. Brick-wallers.
posted by pracowity at 7:53 AM on July 25, 2002

My favorite so far: "Passengers, we may experience some slight turbulance due to some Emo-geek accumulation on the right wing."
posted by Sapphireblue at 7:54 AM on July 25, 2002

Hah, this is great. Josie.... and the pussies. I have to remind my friends and his band to look at this website before they take any photos.
posted by insomnyuk at 7:57 AM on July 25, 2002

They do have a penchant for the blistering insult "douchebag", don't they?
posted by starvingartist at 8:01 AM on July 25, 2002

Great Dennis Milleresque captions!!
posted by fpatrick at 8:07 AM on July 25, 2002

The last thing a Dominos Pizza sees.


"We are the knights who say NASCAR!"
posted by straight at 8:07 AM on July 25, 2002

My favorites:

- At that moment, Jeremy realized a band is no kinda place for a fat man and ...
- The Namblaphonics
posted by dayvin at 8:07 AM on July 25, 2002

Great link!

The evolution of pants is genius.
posted by fatbaq at 8:09 AM on July 25, 2002

Just for you, starvingartist: "These douchebags seem poised to love you up all night long, girl."
posted by Sapphireblue at 8:10 AM on July 25, 2002

For the last time: No, I don't want any head and I don't care if it is only a dollar, now will you let me piss, please?!
posted by straight at 8:11 AM on July 25, 2002

good god! this is why the internet was invented. here are some local geeks I would like to submit:

• Atomic Eyes (because lord knows we need more bands that sound like Creed.)
• The Pusharounds (the little banner at the top left corner says, "made in five minutes." and it shows!)

posted by mcsweetie at 8:11 AM on July 25, 2002

Jeremy feels vaguely self-conscious after the others fail to wear their plastic pants.

Aaaah I can't stop posting!
posted by straight at 8:13 AM on July 25, 2002

This one had me rolling in laughter.
posted by insomnyuk at 8:15 AM on July 25, 2002

The site seems to have it in for dudes named Jeremy — see my post above and straight's.
posted by dayvin at 8:17 AM on July 25, 2002

one more and then I swear I'm done:

"Easy there, stretch marks, it's only a microphone."

Thanks, glenwood :)
posted by Sapphireblue at 8:17 AM on July 25, 2002

God, these are fantastic. If you can possibly stand to take them in bigger doses, start here to go through the whole Douchebag Hall of Fame, and even see some that have MP3 files attached. I haven't plucked up the courage to listen to any yet.
posted by yhbc at 8:18 AM on July 25, 2002

It's interesting how band pictures have evolved over the years. Nobody, it seems, gets their pictures taken with their instruments anymore. Everybody folds their arms. The donning of sunglasses is still (for some reason) supposed to confer automatic cool. (I think wearing sunglasses is supposed to make you an honorary Negro, a la the Blues Brothers.) And thanks to the baggy clothes trend (long may it wave) there are seem to be more fat guys in bands today than at any time in human history.
posted by Faze at 8:18 AM on July 25, 2002

Oh man....these are hilarious....
posted by Succa at 8:19 AM on July 25, 2002

Think the guy in front is the singer? Just a hunch.
posted by straight at 8:19 AM on July 25, 2002

Holy shit this one's gritty: Confederate flag, and four guys in bandanas in a room strewn with porn.

yhbc: most of them sound downright horrible.
posted by insomnyuk at 8:19 AM on July 25, 2002

Should the powerful forces of Cliff Yablonski and Rock and Roll Confidential ever merge, it would unleash a maelstrom of ridicule such that the world has never seen.
posted by Pinwheel at 8:23 AM on July 25, 2002

Oh my God, these are way too funny. : )
posted by SisterHavana at 8:31 AM on July 25, 2002

Sam Walton's favorite band.
posted by thewittyname at 8:31 AM on July 25, 2002

Cliff Yablonski was exactly who i was thinking about. TERRIFIC link...
posted by lotsofno at 8:35 AM on July 25, 2002

Holy crap, I'm crying right now:

The last thing you ...and your butthole... want to see on a hike
posted by jonah at 8:41 AM on July 25, 2002

There really ought to be a band named the Namblaphonics.
posted by rks404 at 8:55 AM on July 25, 2002

This is great - thanks for posting it, glenwood! (nearly wetting my pants laughing)
posted by beth at 9:00 AM on July 25, 2002

Hilarious. Dear God, and depressing as well.
posted by evanizer at 9:00 AM on July 25, 2002

These guys hike specifically to run into the guys in the last picture.

Superb!
posted by i_cola at 9:02 AM on July 25, 2002

Run kids, they're priests!
posted by insomnyuk at 9:05 AM on July 25, 2002

Link o' the month candidate! Thanks, glenwood!
posted by Slithy_Tove at 9:13 AM on July 25, 2002

I like the "Jeremy" motif. Reinforces the idea that, although the pictured people wanna be unique and rockin', they're really all pretty much the same.

Oh, and to keep the string of "pick one you like and link to it:"

"Aw yeah, and in da back we got mah nigga DJ-F150."
posted by jmcmurry at 9:19 AM on July 25, 2002

Okay, I just inhaled Pepsi because I made the mistake of trying to drink while viewing this one. Be warned!
posted by beth at 9:21 AM on July 25, 2002

From boing boing:

More band photos, mostly from the 60's, 70's and 80's

Its a pity that bands no longer wear matching jumpsuits.
posted by pandaharma at 9:48 AM on July 25, 2002

"Oh sure, I may be a sallow, anemic, Hagstrom-strumming anglophile with bisexual tendencies and a ridiculous hairdo, but I...what was I saying?"

Damn this cubicle i'm stuck in! I need four walls and a door.
posted by Ufez Jones at 10:50 AM on July 25, 2002

They're all Mr. Pink.

Simple, elegant, pants-wettingly funny
posted by UncleFes at 11:01 AM on July 25, 2002

The phone rang at work just as I was looking at this one. It was all I could do to keep from laughing while I answered it:

How long have I been passed out? Why does my butthole hurt?

(No, that is not how I answered the phone, thank you!)
posted by SisterHavana at 11:02 AM on July 25, 2002

The "Stretch Marks" picture isn't a band publicity photo; it's a live shot of Still Life. It's actually a cool photograph, I think.
posted by acornface at 11:21 AM on July 25, 2002

I remember hiking up some damn mountain to take some publicity shots, circa 1994 era grunge. Thank god those aren't on there. Wow, is every band in the same kinda promo photo rut?
posted by mkelley at 11:29 AM on July 25, 2002

The view from inside the Burbank Gold's Gym.
posted by straight at 11:30 AM on July 25, 2002

I personally want to add this scary photo to the mix:


Wanna Fly Vampire Girl?
posted by mkelley at 11:42 AM on July 25, 2002

i have to. Somebody needs a refresher course in irony. LOVE. IT.
posted by sarajflemming at 11:58 AM on July 25, 2002

Dallas, believe it or not, is crawling with these guys:

Do you ever get the feeling that some dudes start bands just so they can dress like this?
posted by dejah420 at 12:37 PM on July 25, 2002

Ha! Kottke's on the far right, and Ev's second from the left, but who are those other two dorks?

:-)
posted by rusty at 12:59 PM on July 25, 2002

Ach! I edited the post on my blog that trackbacks here, and it is showing up as a double post! Help!
posted by adampsyche at 1:11 PM on July 25, 2002

What was that, adam?

Taken mere moments before a secretly seething Jeremy shrieked "You guys are being totally unprofessional!" and stormed out.

posted by yhbc at 2:17 PM on July 25, 2002

I said, pimpin' ain't easy. beeyotch.
posted by adampsyche at 3:38 PM on July 25, 2002

I can't stop looking at them. Somebody help me.
posted by Ty Webb at 4:18 PM on July 25, 2002

Nick (succa), you do not have an available email so I have to ask publicly, could you please IM or email me?
posted by Andrea at 6:13 PM on July 25, 2002

Heh-- ...Doughy, suburban Nintendo champs...

Priceless link! Thank you!
posted by Down10 at 8:56 PM on July 25, 2002

I flipped through these photos for some time, thinking they were harmless fun, before becoming vaguely aware of a sense of restless discomfort, then distinct unease, finally dizzy nausea. Ugh. I had to tear myself away and get some fresh air before I felt well again. Is there a medical term for being embarrassed-to-near-vomiting on someone else's behalf?
posted by Tubes at 4:14 PM on July 26, 2002

Tubes: "Embarrasitis". A condition frequently brought on by watching Fox reality shows and Ben Stiller movies as well.
posted by rusty at 4:16 PM on July 26, 2002

evanizer: Hilarious. Dear God, and depressing as well.

Tubes: Is there a medical term for being embarrassed-to-near-vomiting on someone else's behalf?

You mean the German language doesnt have a word which encapsulates feeling sad and embarassed at the misfortunes of others and yet still be unable to stop laughing?
posted by vacapinta at 4:23 PM on July 26, 2002