Sandal Scandal!

May 15, 2003 9:49 AM

I don't wanna start any blasphemous rumours, but I think these flip-flops got some 'splaining to do.
posted by mikrophon (38 comments total)

"He nice, the Jesus. He make the good things, and on the Easter we be sad because somebody makes him dead today."
posted by mr_crash_davis at 9:54 AM on May 15, 2003

Fark is a website you may want to try sometime. It's real funny. Just like these flip flops.
posted by The Jesse Helms at 9:55 AM on May 15, 2003

Walking on water is a breeze with new Jesus Sandals. Also notable is the fact that the savior is air-cushioned for added comfort, though He can get a little ripe after repeated non-sock usage.
posted by Kafkaesque at 10:01 AM on May 15, 2003

"Some priests believe that one steps on Jesus and the Virgin Mary when putting on the sandal," he added.

No, I think they lived thousands of years ago. And they were, like, regular sized. Not bunion-sized.
posted by Pretty_Generic at 10:07 AM on May 15, 2003

Someone needs to point out the recent kerfuffle over Ganesha on sandals and toilet seats. Might as well be me.
posted by SealWyf at 10:16 AM on May 15, 2003

NEW, IMPROVED JESUS & MARY FOOTWEAR ABSORBS EMBARRASSING FOOT ODOR!
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posted by quonsar at 10:17 AM on May 15, 2003

No one's imaginary friend in the sky should keep me from wearing whatever footwear I want.
posted by bshort at 10:18 AM on May 15, 2003

Reminds me of the story of Abraham and his dad an idol maker. God does not live in objects, your soul/mind.

The real issue is; are they sandals or flip-flops?
posted by thomcatspike at 10:21 AM on May 15, 2003

Well, I always wanted to walk all over religion.
posted by xmutex at 10:24 AM on May 15, 2003

So here's something that doesn't make sense to me: sandals with jesus on them are bad because you're walking on jesus, but in many major supermarket/pharmacy stores you can buy a big candle with jesus or mary on it.

Aren't you "burning jesus at the stake" when you melt a candle with their image on it?

Also, if any danish metafilter users read this - get yourself as many pairs as possible and jump on the old ebay to unload them at a profit (as we've seen before).
posted by mathowie at 10:25 AM on May 15, 2003

The real issue is; are they sandals or flip-flops?

Look like thongs to me.
posted by soyjoy at 10:28 AM on May 15, 2003

Whatever they are, they've got to be bad for your sole.
posted by Pericles at 10:33 AM on May 15, 2003

My only question is, where do I get myself a pair? I need new footwear for church!
posted by Jughead at 10:35 AM on May 15, 2003

"When there was only one set of foot prints, that was when you were STEPPING ON MY FACE!"
posted by Hildago at 10:40 AM on May 15, 2003

That was horrible, Pericles.
posted by bhorling at 10:42 AM on May 15, 2003

That was beautiful, Hildago.
posted by Pretty_Generic at 10:45 AM on May 15, 2003

I prefer the sandals that leave messages in the sand that say "Jesus Loves You" myself.
posted by Ufez Jones at 10:46 AM on May 15, 2003

The real issue is; are they sandals or flip-flops?

Zorries where I come from (alt. zoris).
Flip flops, go-aheads, thongs, slippers ("slippahs"), wedges/wedgies. Never sandals. Please.
posted by G_Ask at 10:48 AM on May 15, 2003

*flings flipflops at mikrophon for getting DePeCHe MoDe stuck in my head*
posted by eckeric at 10:49 AM on May 15, 2003

I know you don't want to start any blasphemous rumors, but you know, I think God's got a sick sense of humor.
posted by bryanzera at 10:50 AM on May 15, 2003

I think it is interesting how the religious protesters went in and destroyed some of the sandals. Aren't they destorying the image of jesus then? Isn't that just as blasphemous as wearing them?
posted by trbrts at 11:05 AM on May 15, 2003

Aren't you "burning jesus at the stake" when you melt a candle with their image on it?

Well heck, the poor guy gets cannabalized during mass. And what's the big deal? Jesus washed peoples' smelly, dirty feet anyway.
posted by Shane at 11:51 AM on May 15, 2003

So what these Christians who complained would like, are a pair of satanic flip-flops, so they can walk on the devil?

I dunno, if you look at it another way, Jesus could be considered a firm basis upon which to stand; diamonds on the soles of her shoes, and all that.

Satanic flip-flops. That's a good title for a song.
posted by Blue Stone at 12:55 PM on May 15, 2003

I'm a Christian, and I don't see anything wrong with this. Hell, I'd love it if someone wore flip flops with my image on them!
posted by premiumpolar at 12:58 PM on May 15, 2003

Oh, now I don't! understand how this relates to the Christian practice of foot-washing:

Because foot traffic was on dusty roads in open sandals in Biblical times, it was a customary sign of hospitality for a host to wash a guest's feet, or to provide him with water to wash his own feet, or to have a servant do it for him (Gen. 18:4; 19:1-2; 24:31-32; 43:24; Judges 19:16-21; I Sam. 25:40-41; Luke 7:36-38).

Jesus' disciples had been bickering over who was the greatest (Luke 12:24-30). So on the evening of his betrayal, Jesus wanted to teach them a lesson on humility and servanthood (John 13:1-17). That he did not intend to establish a ritual practice is evident by His saying

1) "You do not realize now what I am doing, but later you will understand" (v. 7).

2) "Do you understand what I have done for you?" (v. 12)

3) "...I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet..." (v. 14)
posted by MiguelCardoso at 1:07 PM on May 15, 2003

It may seem an improper analogy but replace the Image of Jesus with Buddha...that should clear up alot of the confusion.

now if the sandals where hanging on the wall, that would be nice for say the cabana or by the tiki bar in the cinderblock basement.
posted by clavdivs at 1:11 PM on May 15, 2003

replace the Image of Jesus with Buddha...that should clear up alot of the confusion.

No, I was fine up till there... now I'm confused.
posted by soyjoy at 2:05 PM on May 15, 2003

Shouldn't there be a nailhole in the center?
posted by basilwhite at 2:06 PM on May 15, 2003

Aren't they destorying the image of jesus then? Isn't that just as blasphemous as wearing them?

Nobody knows what Jesus looked like anyway. As far as God is concerned, these sandals have the image of some random hippie on them.
posted by kindall at 5:38 PM on May 15, 2003

Aaaarghhhh!

They're not sandals (straps and buckles and stuff) or flip-flops (which have a single loop that your foot fits through)! They're jandals! Jandals, curse you all!

(Calling them thongs is just confusing. With, you know, other thongs.)

Well, now that that's out of the way, I think having Jesus on my jandals would be nice. These are cool too. Even if they don't get the name right.
posted by wilberforce at 6:38 PM on May 15, 2003

Nobody knows what Jesus looked like anyway . . . these sandals have the image of some random hippie on them.

Long haired hippy?
posted by Shane at 8:44 PM on May 15, 2003

(Ooops--"Nobody knows what Jesus..." should have been ital. or quotes.)
posted by Shane at 8:47 PM on May 15, 2003

Jandals!? Heehee, that just sounds stoopit! Sandals have leather straps and stuff... I vote for thongs.
posted by Onanist at 10:33 PM on May 15, 2003

I always keep some currency in the bottom of my boot. For emergencies, mostly, but also for the sheer joy of treading on capital.
posted by kaibutsu at 11:02 PM on May 15, 2003

They're not . . . flip-flops (which have a single loop that your foot fits through)!

Ahem.

flip-flop
n.

A backless, often foam rubber sandal held to the foot at the big toe by means of a thong.
posted by mikrophon at 6:44 AM on May 16, 2003

Long haired hippy?

Man, you're going to have a hard time convincing mainline Christians that Jesus looked like one of those cave-man dummies from the natural history museum.
posted by mikrophon at 7:08 AM on May 16, 2003

When you see the buddha on the road, kill him.
posted by monju_bosatsu at 8:53 PM on May 16, 2003

...is that like, some taoist thing?

exterminate the sage and all that?
posted by clavdivs at 10:36 AM on May 19, 2003