Feel The Taint

September 12, 2005 4:38 PM

Feel The Taint:Dave Hill is obsessed with Norwegian Black Metal, the exciting musical genre brought to international prominence in the early '90's thanks to a series of church burnings, murders, suicides, and other surefire attention-getting devices. Recently his desire to become part of the scene reached such a fever pitch that he couldn't help but reach out to a longtime member of the Norwegian Black Metal community.
posted by shotsy (31 comments total)

Awesome. I'm thirsty for a smoothie.
posted by Rothko at 4:52 PM on September 12, 2005

Losers baiting losers, its the newest Olympic sport.

Now, if you'll excuse me, my mom needs to use the computer.
posted by fenriq at 4:59 PM on September 12, 2005

Mmmmmmm...taint.
posted by mullingitover at 5:00 PM on September 12, 2005

Feel The Taint

No thanks.
posted by clevershark at 5:01 PM on September 12, 2005

Where I'm from, we call it "grundle".
posted by wakko at 5:03 PM on September 12, 2005

What's up with the Scandinavians taking the "dark," side of Metal about 5 billion megawatts to seriously? Relax, Bjorn, read an Archi comic or something.
posted by jonmc at 5:05 PM on September 12, 2005

Look out for Scandanavia. Seriously. That region is the new Canada in terms of music. Sigur Ros and Bjork are just the tip of the iceberg. Seriously, right in this thread, mark my words.
posted by Mach3avelli at 5:10 PM on September 12, 2005

jonmc, i, as a tr00ly grim and frostbitten nekro kvltist, wouldn't expect you to understand. also, the 101 rules of black metal
posted by flavor at 5:11 PM on September 12, 2005

Man, I hated Archi comics with that stupid Jughea guy and Veronic and Bett. Its like the whole thing was missing something, something important.

But yeah, people who take extreme black metal so seriously should probably lighten up with a little Sade and a nice merlot or something.
posted by fenriq at 5:12 PM on September 12, 2005

It's insane, this band's taint!
posted by tittergrrl at 5:13 PM on September 12, 2005

\m/
posted by loquacious at 5:15 PM on September 12, 2005

Taint Misbehavin'!
posted by scody at 5:17 PM on September 12, 2005

Dave Hill obsessed with Black Metal? Who'd have thought!
posted by nylon at 5:18 PM on September 12, 2005

Man, I thought this had already been posted here. It's funny though...
posted by klangklangston at 5:37 PM on September 12, 2005

But yeah, people who take extreme black metal so seriously should probably lighten up with a little Sade and a nice merlot or something.

Let's not get crazy. Howabout some Budweiser and Van Halen, instead?
posted by jonmc at 5:50 PM on September 12, 2005

Where I'm from, we call it "grundle".

Here, it's called a "chin rest."
posted by horsewithnoname at 6:33 PM on September 12, 2005

Looks like the region is ripe for an ABBA reunion.

(The big snowy region, I mean, not the taint, you sickos.)
posted by BoringPostcards at 6:36 PM on September 12, 2005

the dudes that made the acclaimed Moog documentary, hans fjellstad and ryan page, are going to take on Lords of Chaos next, with adam parfrey, the Feral House publisher, as screenwriter. (parfrey played the minstrel in crispin glover's "what is it?")

the streets of park city will flow with the blood of the non-believers!
posted by Hat Maui at 6:42 PM on September 12, 2005

Metafilter: sticking my clouded frost-spire into her gates of attrition
posted by blm at 7:10 PM on September 12, 2005

I totally thought "Lords of Chaos" would make a great movie. Alas, I didn't have the guts or the means.

This was hilarious, BTW. Now, I must go kill myself.
posted by fungible at 7:30 PM on September 12, 2005

related MeFi thread: An interesting interview with Varg Vikernes. (who just might have burned down Norway's first stave church)
posted by dabitch at 7:32 PM on September 12, 2005

Man, these false metal posers are weak. I bet Caninus or Hatebeak could eat them alive.
posted by arto at 8:13 PM on September 12, 2005

In a long line of prank email correspondence, this is one of the lamest, as the prank-er comes of as much less cluefull than the prank-ed.
posted by signal at 8:31 PM on September 12, 2005

This shit is awesome! In fact, this is my new mantra.

in a perfect world, black metal would exist totally in the mind (as it does with me much of the time). we would hear the black sounds pouring through our brain as we sit in darkness (or maybe there could be a torch nearby). this is true black metal.
posted by nadawi at 8:42 PM on September 12, 2005

The Top 10 (okay, 20) Most Ridiculous Black Metal Pics Of All Time: \m/ \m/
posted by numlok at 11:03 PM on September 12, 2005

Hey. I record black metal and then don't let anybody listen to it. Is that so wrong?
posted by ikkyu2 at 12:21 AM on September 13, 2005

Sigur Ros and Bjork are just the tip of the iceberg.

Is Iceland considered Scandinavia?
posted by Marquis at 3:14 AM on September 13, 2005

\mm/

Too much rock for one hand.
posted by klangklangston at 6:05 AM on September 13, 2005

Is Iceland considered Scandinavia?

That depends.
Geographically - no, culturally - sometimes.

It's definetly a Nordic country, though.
posted by spazzm at 6:38 AM on September 13, 2005

Thanks Nylon, now I must play some Slade.

If someone wants some black metal with intelligence, might I recommend Opeth
posted by Ber at 9:44 AM on September 13, 2005

Man, when you take this piss with black metalers, you are really going after the low hanging fruit. Plus Norwegian black metal dudes can in no way, shape or form hang with say, South American Metalheads, who are for real lunatics and the only time they paint their faces is when they headbutt some suckers and accidentally get blood on their grills.

That is all.

SKULLKRUSHER!
posted by Divine_Wino at 11:02 AM on September 13, 2005