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Marginally offensive pun
April 11, 2006 6:53 AM Subscribe

One-link post about blog post without additional explanatory text
posted by beth (866 comments total) 9 users marked this as a favorite

Outrage!
posted by CynicalKnight at 6:56 AM on April 11, 2006

metafilter parody. no comment from me, i'll leave that to everyone else.
posted by ColdChef at 6:57 AM on April 11, 2006

Well missy, you just wait til ~~your father~~ the mefi police hears about this! You and your one link. A blog is nothing to joke about, you know! (Even if I did laugh.)
posted by Secret Life of Gravy at 6:58 AM on April 11, 2006

This is so pre-September 11th-mentality...
posted by DragonBoy at 6:59 AM on April 11, 2006

Suggestion that this is either the best or the worst of the web.
posted by twine42 at 7:00 AM on April 11, 2006

Nonsensical statement involving plankton.
posted by Krrrlson at 7:01 AM on April 11, 2006

How does Bush keep getting away with things like this? Welcome to the United States of Apathy! Iraq, Iran, nukes, global warming, immigration, Plame, leaks, lies, Rove, Diebold... wake up morans.
posted by digaman at 7:01 AM on April 11, 2006

OmieWise
posted by OmieWise at 7:01 AM on April 11, 2006

Flag.
posted by sveskemus at 7:03 AM on April 11, 2006

.
posted by SteveInMaine at 7:05 AM on April 11, 2006

Obligatory mention of 9622, on-preview note that ColdChef beat me to it.
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 7:06 AM on April 11, 2006

Best of the web!
posted by effwerd at 7:08 AM on April 11, 2006

But does it know what a portabello mushroom looks like?
posted by dances_with_sneetches at 7:08 AM on April 11, 2006

give it a rest dios.
posted by fire&wings at 7:10 AM on April 11, 2006

This blog post... it vibrates???
posted by spacewaitress at 7:10 AM on April 11, 2006

More Generic Literature.

My favorite is this limerick:

There once was an X from place B
That satisfied predicate P
He or she did thing A
In an adjective way
Resulting in circumstance C
posted by beth at 7:10 AM on April 11, 2006

Complaint about community's ~~insousiance~~ ~~insusience~~ ~~ensuciance~~ detached, ironic, hipper-than-thou attitude.
posted by Armitage Shanks at 7:12 AM on April 11, 2006

Animated gif.
posted by milquetoast at 7:13 AM on April 11, 2006

Derail.
posted by Thorzdad at 7:14 AM on April 11, 2006

Complaint about the use of an animated gif with an appeal towards mathowie's authority and a comparison to Fark.
posted by unreason at 7:14 AM on April 11, 2006

Half-hearted demand to stop resurrecting ancient MF cult threads.
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 7:16 AM on April 11, 2006

Derisive dismissal.
posted by I Love Tacos at 7:16 AM on April 11, 2006

I am so gonna tell on you.
posted by bluesky43 at 7:17 AM on April 11, 2006

Throwaway comment involving quonsar, fish, and pants.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 7:17 AM on April 11, 2006

Complaint about I Love Taco's pattern of derisive dismissals with link to metatalk
posted by unreason at 7:18 AM on April 11, 2006

Ironic summons to Bevet
posted by found missing at 7:19 AM on April 11, 2006

I never manage to get comments into these threads before they're deleted.
posted by octothorpe at 7:21 AM on April 11, 2006

Penis joke.
posted by SmileyChewtrain at 7:22 AM on April 11, 2006

Double of comment that appeared earlier in thread, as I was to lazy to read other people's comments.
posted by Astro Zombie at 7:22 AM on April 11, 2006

A desperate attempt to fit in.
posted by slimepuppy at 7:22 AM on April 11, 2006

Last post.
posted by NationalKato at 7:22 AM on April 11, 2006

Gratuitous self-link thinly disguised as indispensable expert commentary.
posted by digaman at 7:22 AM on April 11, 2006

(Actually, that should be an off-topic link to my own penis. Can I edit my comments?)
posted by SmileyChewtrain at 7:22 AM on April 11, 2006

Suggestion for new Metafilter tag line.
posted by brool at 7:23 AM on April 11, 2006

Vaguely unsettling and humorless comment on religion from formerly hilarious poster.
posted by PinkStainlessTail at 7:24 AM on April 11, 2006

In joke involving ponies or cameras
posted by handee at 7:25 AM on April 11, 2006

Callout to MeTa followed by continuing of snarking and flaming in the original post.
posted by twine42 at 7:25 AM on April 11, 2006

Surely beth is AlexReynolds new sock puppet.
posted by Popular Ethics at 7:28 AM on April 11, 2006

Signing my name to this comment.
posted by mullacc at 7:28 AM on April 11, 2006

Whine that it's been over 40,000 comments since 9622 and we should be allowed to have this sort of fun every so often.

Defense of thread based on poster's user number, and its relation to that of (at least some) of those of the snarkers.
posted by beth at 7:29 AM on April 11, 2006

Metafilter: Suggestion for new Metafilter tag line
posted by octothorpe at 7:29 AM on April 11, 2006

Question what the single dot means.
posted by exlotuseater at 7:29 AM on April 11, 2006

This is a good time to link the best of Mefi
posted by Popular Ethics at 7:29 AM on April 11, 2006

Double of comment that appeared earlier in thread, as I was to lazy to read other people's comments.
posted by magpie68 at 7:30 AM on April 11, 2006

Transparently butt-kissing reference to the latest minutiae on mathowie's blog in an absurdly pointless attempt to earn points with the host and give a pool full of edgy piranhas a warm and fuzzy feeling.
posted by digaman at 7:30 AM on April 11, 2006

Correction of use of "comments" when I meant "posts".
posted by beth at 7:31 AM on April 11, 2006

Off topic, child-free, anti-vaccination, anti-circumcision rant.
posted by The Bellman at 7:33 AM on April 11, 2006

Metafilter: new sugestion
posted by Richard Daly at 7:34 AM on April 11, 2006

Obnoxious reference to well-known mefi catfight saga, that is akin to poking one of the participants with a sharp stick.
posted by beth at 7:34 AM on April 11, 2006

On Preview: Complaint about preview
posted by Richard Daly at 7:34 AM on April 11, 2006

Complaint from Jessamyn that Mathowie has now made this thread about her vagina
posted by found missing at 7:35 AM on April 11, 2006

NSFW!
posted by digaman at 7:35 AM on April 11, 2006

Observation that unidentified earlier comment was well-played.
posted by emelenjr at 7:38 AM on April 11, 2006

Suggestion that mefi was a lot better before <something>.
posted by beth at 7:38 AM on April 11, 2006

Nurses online grudge.
posted by Cyrano at 7:39 AM on April 11, 2006

Long outraged screed accidentally posted to the wrong thread.
posted by octothorpe at 7:40 AM on April 11, 2006

Non-sequitur ebay-related in-joke.
posted by GuyZero at 7:41 AM on April 11, 2006

Accidentally response to another MeFi thread unrelated to this thread entirely.
posted by antifuse at 7:41 AM on April 11, 2006

One of three short, off-topic posts necessary before I can self-link.
posted by NotMyselfRightNow at 7:41 AM on April 11, 2006

Declaration of winner.
posted by GuyZero at 7:41 AM on April 11, 2006

Questioning if MeFi has 'jumped the shark' with this post.
posted by DragonBoy at 7:41 AM on April 11, 2006

Comment about being beaten to a comment by a single minute, wishing that I had previewed first.
posted by antifuse at 7:42 AM on April 11, 2006

Slur against Christianity specifically and all religions, everywhere, generally.
posted by beth at 7:43 AM on April 11, 2006

Complaint about all the users with numbers higher that the poster's and request to Matt to close sign-ups again.
posted by octothorpe at 7:43 AM on April 11, 2006

Unsolicited poem.
posted by Faint of Butt at 7:44 AM on April 11, 2006

APRIL FOOLS!

sorry, Eideteker
posted by casarkos at 7:47 AM on April 11, 2006

Smug comment about not owning a television.
posted by emelenjr at 7:48 AM on April 11, 2006

Metafilter: no comment from me, i'll leave that to everyone else.
posted by Joseph Gurl at 7:48 AM on April 11, 2006

Unrelated personal anecdote that has nothing to do with the post nor with any of the comments.
posted by beth at 7:49 AM on April 11, 2006

Correction of spelling/grammar in a previous comment despite the intention or the original comment being obvious.
posted by antifuse at 7:50 AM on April 11, 2006

Overly demonstrative caffeine-fueled declaration of love for Mefi. Wistful speculation about the wherabouts of Miguel; this nostalgic invocation cleverly demonstrates just how long current poster has been around.
posted by jokeefe at 7:51 AM on April 11, 2006

Throwaway reference to Schizopolis.
posted by muckster at 7:52 AM on April 11, 2006

MCCLOUD!!
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 7:52 AM on April 11, 2006

Metafilter was auto discovered by our system (sorry no name in here to avoid trouble) and I saw it frequently appears in our top news page. Since then, metafilter is my daily reading.
posted by maxreax at 7:54 AM on April 11, 2006

Is this one of those things that I need a something to understand?
posted by antifuse at 7:54 AM on April 11, 2006

Comment pertaining to different thread.
posted by wilberforce at 7:56 AM on April 11, 2006

Comment english broke for, found humor in by speakers of native.
posted by luftmensch at 7:57 AM on April 11, 2006

Supercilious put-down from a 20-something American expat trying to sound like a 40-something European or Canadian, airily exasperated by how all Americans could be so ill-informed, gullible, or just plain dumb.
posted by digaman at 7:58 AM on April 11, 2006

Picture of cute animal with something incongruous on its head.
posted by octothorpe at 7:58 AM on April 11, 2006

Obligatory Family Guy joke.
posted by WidgetAlley at 7:58 AM on April 11, 2006

Humorous story about a tapeworm.
posted by milquetoast at 8:00 AM on April 11, 2006

[meta-comment: It's amazing how satisfying it is to make these generic posts, as if they fully satisfy the desire to post without needing to engage tiresomely specific "content."]
posted by digaman at 8:00 AM on April 11, 2006

Dull, snakes on a plane. At best.
posted by keijo at 8:02 AM on April 11, 2006

LET'S GO RIDE BIKES!!!1!1!
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 8:03 AM on April 11, 2006

Link to MetaTalk thread created because milquetoast wasn't kind enough to mention the tapeworm photos were NSFW.
posted by emelenjr at 8:04 AM on April 11, 2006

Extremely funny and insightful comment.
posted by sgt.serenity at 8:04 AM on April 11, 2006

Off-topic rant indirectly linking the poster to an unsolved murder in Maine.
posted by CynicalKnight at 8:04 AM on April 11, 2006

Halliburton.
posted by digaman at 8:05 AM on April 11, 2006

A previous witty comment wins!
posted by Meatbomb at 8:07 AM on April 11, 2006

Frustrated snark that intends to criticise Metafilter's US-centredness, but gets widely misintepreted as attacking Americans in general.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 8:07 AM on April 11, 2006

This is why we can't have nice things.
posted by hangashore at 8:09 AM on April 11, 2006

Off-topic request to Matt for a pony.
posted by jokeefe at 8:11 AM on April 11, 2006

Returns to earlier comment, diecreted at another poster, that contained a snotty question. Reminds other poster that this question is yet to be answered.
posted by Astro Zombie at 8:11 AM on April 11, 2006

Comment that make it obvious that I haven't actually read any of the links post but am just pontificating about the subject in general.
posted by octothorpe at 8:12 AM on April 11, 2006

Smug countdown to post deletion in 3... 2... 1...
posted by CynicalKnight at 8:14 AM on April 11, 2006

Correction of a misspelling in my previous comment.
posted by octothorpe at 8:14 AM on April 11, 2006

Comment accusing an earlier commenter of sexism for no apparent reason.
posted by jennaratrix at 8:17 AM on April 11, 2006

complaint about already having read this on boing boing.
posted by whatnot at 8:17 AM on April 11, 2006

Baby jesus usually cries right now
posted by gsteff at 8:18 AM on April 11, 2006

Makes rambling comments
posted by slogger at 8:20 AM on April 11, 2006

that stretches across three posts
posted by slogger at 8:20 AM on April 11, 2006

when one post would've been sufficient.
posted by slogger at 8:20 AM on April 11, 2006

pissingelephant.jpg
posted by Gamblor at 8:21 AM on April 11, 2006

Obviously unresearched comment posted simply for the sake of participating in the thread.
posted by BuddhaInABucket at 8:21 AM on April 11, 2006

Revelation of terminal illness.
posted by If I Had An Anus at 8:22 AM on April 11, 2006

Link to Meta matteo multiple sockpuppet pileon.
posted by y2karl at 8:23 AM on April 11, 2006

Makes grammar correction five posts later.
posted by slogger at 8:24 AM on April 11, 2006

Huffy outraged comment by poster about how this was a fine post and he/she did read the guidelines and how you people are just mean and you can have your stupid website 'cause he/she's leaving and not reading/posting anymore.
posted by octothorpe at 8:25 AM on April 11, 2006

Gentle reminder that the huffy, outraged commenter is not the original poster
posted by gsteff at 8:27 AM on April 11, 2006

Claim about not being snarky in real life. Even to newborns.
posted by If I Had An Anus at 8:30 AM on April 11, 2006

Correction of grammer correction (with bonus missppellinng).
posted by hangashore at 8:31 AM on April 11, 2006

Outraged comparison between FPP topic and Hitler
posted by caution live frogs at 8:32 AM on April 11, 2006

Condescending dismissal of all opposing viewpoints and a declaration that you aren't educated enough about this topic to have a meaningful opinion.

And a reminder to just take five seconds to THINK before commenting!
posted by Gamblor at 8:32 AM on April 11, 2006

Comment.
posted by boo_radley at 8:33 AM on April 11, 2006

Outraged comparison between Hitler topic and mathowie
posted by gsteff at 8:33 AM on April 11, 2006

quonsar wins the thread.
posted by keijo at 8:33 AM on April 11, 2006

Coca Cola to release Coca Cola Black. Now we know what they've used in those diaper and maxipad commercials all these years.
posted by Homeskillet Freshy Fresh at 8:34 AM on April 11, 2006

[comment deleted by jessamyn]
posted by grouse at 8:37 AM on April 11, 2006

Assumption about previous poster's country of origin. Supporting links from poster's MeFi posting history.
posted by emelenjr at 8:37 AM on April 11, 2006

JRUN error
posted by mr_crash_davis at 8:39 AM on April 11, 2006

So the nun said, 'pass ME the avacado!'
posted by davelog at 8:39 AM on April 11, 2006

lurk.
posted by crunchyk9 at 8:44 AM on April 11, 2006

Tired rehashing of neverending political argument by same six assholes. Supporting links to inflammatory comments in past threads to justify why you just can't let it go.
posted by Gamblor at 8:44 AM on April 11, 2006

…
posted by prostyle at 8:45 AM on April 11, 2006

Unnoticed post by long-time lurker.
posted by DakotaPaul at 8:46 AM on April 11, 2006

Run on sentence smothered in rage over Bush fatigue rage not accomplishing much but being beautifully self-destructively procastinatory (which I'm told is a symptom of anxiety and can be treated by taking half a Xanax).
posted by Skygazer at 8:47 AM on April 11, 2006

Post about PP being a troll that can't be deleted.
posted by keijo at 8:48 AM on April 11, 2006

Somewhat off-topic story about myself.
posted by LarryC at 8:50 AM on April 11, 2006

Demands question about "." be answered!
posted by deborah at 8:51 AM on April 11, 2006

[this is good]
posted by LordSludge at 8:52 AM on April 11, 2006

Post about the progress of the MetaFilter redesign.
posted by keijo at 8:52 AM on April 11, 2006

I for one welcome.....
posted by knapah at 8:52 AM on April 11, 2006

Desperate attempt at a communicatin and communal bon homie caused by still lingering symptoms of 9/11 post traumatic stress and bizarre vague expressions of affection for familiar Metafites and their oh so lenghty ironic and silly usernames.
posted by Skygazer at 8:56 AM on April 11, 2006

Bruce Willis's character is already dead.
posted by emelenjr at 8:56 AM on April 11, 2006

Virtuoso legal or technical analysis that totally misses the issue at hand.
posted by Richard Daly at 8:56 AM on April 11, 2006

Alcohol induced rant leading to drug induced stupor.
posted by ?! at 8:56 AM on April 11, 2006

Quote of music lyrics from band you have never heard of (or if you have heard of them, you can't stand them).
posted by beth at 8:56 AM on April 11, 2006

half-assed attempt at pecemaking through humor followed by walking off in a drunken huff.
posted by jonmc at 8:57 AM on April 11, 2006

Declaration that this is all very meta.
posted by If I Had An Anus at 8:58 AM on April 11, 2006

Questionable use of "You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means."
posted by Behold, I Have An Anus! at 8:58 AM on April 11, 2006

Knowing insinuation that the author of the blog is a member of the Church of $cientology.
posted by digaman at 8:59 AM on April 11, 2006

[grabs popcorn, sits back comfortably]
posted by gurple at 8:59 AM on April 11, 2006

*ducks*
posted by jefbla at 8:59 AM on April 11, 2006

Lament for the passing of the fabled golden age of metafilter, a time when threads were just so much more intellectual and civil (and all you n00bs weren't allowed in).
posted by Gamblor at 9:02 AM on April 11, 2006

n00b questions absence of pancakes. No?
posted by green herring at 9:04 AM on April 11, 2006

Provision of personal assistance in maintaining a healty, respectful discussion via focusing my comments on the issues, topics, and facts at hand — most certainly not directing such at other members of this site.
posted by Fezboy! at 9:06 AM on April 11, 2006

Brillant politcal insight of the human endeavor that begins the revolution right NOW and causes all Neocons (from Bush on down) to spontanously combust after an hour of excruciating pain and deep ruinioius feelings of embarassment, shame and guilt.
posted by Skygazer at 9:06 AM on April 11, 2006

Most generic comment ever!
posted by mosk at 9:06 AM on April 11, 2006

non-sequitor revelation of personal issues that serves to make everyone look at their shoes nervously.
posted by jonmc at 9:07 AM on April 11, 2006

Mmmm.... pancakes.
posted by keijo at 9:08 AM on April 11, 2006

*randomly flags various comments as noise, derail, and/or fantastic comment/post.*
posted by Fezboy! at 9:08 AM on April 11, 2006

*looks at shoes nervously*
posted by octothorpe at 9:08 AM on April 11, 2006

Observation that your favorite band sucks
posted by found missing at 9:08 AM on April 11, 2006

Realization that this thread totally rocks!
posted by Skygazer at 9:09 AM on April 11, 2006

rational observation calms keswick's senses
posted by Fezboy! at 9:10 AM on April 11, 2006

[via Drudge]
posted by trinarian at 9:11 AM on April 11, 2006

flags the thread and moves on
posted by keijo at 9:12 AM on April 11, 2006

Self conscious dada comment involving high tech Japanese condoms and robots.
posted by Skygazer at 9:15 AM on April 11, 2006

Hillary Clinton is not the answer.
posted by digaman at 9:16 AM on April 11, 2006

[Best/worst]. [Topic]. EVAR.
posted by slogger at 9:17 AM on April 11, 2006

Disengaged flip remark derived from lack of energy to read comments in entirety.
posted by Mr Bluesky at 9:17 AM on April 11, 2006

Declaration that I'm drinking while posting, included for no other reason than that I'm drunk and therefore think it's funny.
posted by ook at 9:17 AM on April 11, 2006

If only we had a built-in system to bring such posts to the attention of our administrators instead of just shitting all over the site.

*looks at kiejo*
posted by If I Had An Anus at 9:17 AM on April 11, 2006

In-joke referring back to a flame-out dating back a half-decade.
posted by Astro Zombie at 9:18 AM on April 11, 2006

correct mispelled username
posted by If I Had An Anus at 9:18 AM on April 11, 2006

Request to Matt to remove this post due to it being a double.
posted by DragonBoy at 9:18 AM on April 11, 2006

*corresct*
posted by If I Had An Anus at 9:18 AM on April 11, 2006

*corrects*
posted by If I Had An Anus at 9:18 AM on April 11, 2006

request for nudity.
posted by jonmc at 9:18 AM on April 11, 2006

*grr*
posted by If I Had An Anus at 9:18 AM on April 11, 2006

Threat of physical violence for using a sig in a comment.

-Gamblor
posted by Gamblor at 9:21 AM on April 11, 2006

Drinking while posting. Good thing or malice. Discuss.
posted by keijo at 9:21 AM on April 11, 2006

An' here I sit so patiently
Waiting to find out what price
You have to pay to get out of
Going through all these things twice.

-Bob Dylan
posted by jonmc at 9:21 AM on April 11, 2006

comment predicting deletion of post
posted by bluesky43 at 9:21 AM on April 11, 2006

Picture of pet rabbit.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 9:22 AM on April 11, 2006

Observation that the mushroom thread had 1032 comments.
posted by octothorpe at 9:24 AM on April 11, 2006

What they said.
posted by MetaMonkey at 9:24 AM on April 11, 2006

Gratuitous use of fornication-referencing obscenity and odd punctuation in 4 lines of one word each: question word [period], definite article [period], aforementioned obscenity [period]. poster's name [?!].
posted by picopebbles at 9:24 AM on April 11, 2006

comment about moving the thread to meta so it can be labelled the worst call-out ever. Hilarity ensues in the grey.
posted by keijo at 9:24 AM on April 11, 2006

Suggestion that PP perform lewd act.
posted by Skygazer at 9:25 AM on April 11, 2006

Mostly unwitty comment followed by complaints that nobody will read it due to being too far down the page.
posted by evilangela at 9:25 AM on April 11, 2006

passing of gas.
posted by jonmc at 9:26 AM on April 11, 2006

Hillariously witty comment that is at the same time so terribly obscure that only the poster laughs.
posted by CunningLinguist at 9:29 AM on April 11, 2006

Reminder to all that jonmc really likes beer.
posted by Gamblor at 9:29 AM on April 11, 2006

utterly gratuitous quoting of Dictators lyrics and/or Richard price prose, followed by half-hearted apology.
posted by jonmc at 9:31 AM on April 11, 2006

Knowing laughter about CunningLinguist's joke, despite misunderstanding it completely
posted by ook at 9:31 AM on April 11, 2006

Vaguely off-topic comment that contains hidden but deep-seated meetup-related personal drama involving another poster.
posted by CunningLinguist at 9:32 AM on April 11, 2006

after-post coverup, attempting to explain that I actually did understand CunningLinguist's joke, which only makes it even more clear that I did not
posted by ook at 9:32 AM on April 11, 2006

Comment from n00b who "signs" his name at the end of the paragraph, not realizing that the form does it for him. the_bone
posted by the_bone at 9:32 AM on April 11, 2006

inept attempt at flirtation.
posted by jonmc at 9:33 AM on April 11, 2006

Metafilter: [something witty]
posted by Sijeka at 9:33 AM on April 11, 2006

Responds, "Hey, nice $whatever reference!" to CunningLinguist's witty comment in a pathetic and desperate attempt to prove to the rest of MeFi that I am smarter than them for "getting" it.
posted by the_bone at 9:35 AM on April 11, 2006

Accusation that another poster is a drama queen followed by gratuious outings of real names.
posted by CunningLinguist at 9:35 AM on April 11, 2006

Obsevation that this was on Fark three days ago.
posted by Mcable at 9:35 AM on April 11, 2006

Attempt to let everyone know poster knows how to spell gratuitous really.
posted by CunningLinguist at 9:36 AM on April 11, 2006

Hasty post without using the preview button to check spelling.
posted by Mcable at 9:36 AM on April 11, 2006

Au courant reference to furries, BBW, polyamory, hentai, BDSM, ana and mia, slash fiction, pedophilia, pumps, Viagra abuse, water sports, autofellatio, self-amputees, scatophilia, or some other thankfully marginal erotic subculture, with no allusion to the fact that it's patently gross, because that would seem dreadfully unhip.
posted by digaman at 9:37 AM on April 11, 2006

Suspicion that the roundtable blog is the new art form (tm), and the onset of a hive mentality when all of us are wired up the wazoo. Good or bad?

Obscure quote from British TV show involving a Prisoner, that aggressively supports individuality and non-conformity upon pain of death...
posted by Skygazer at 9:37 AM on April 11, 2006

removal of wire from wazoo.
posted by jonmc at 9:39 AM on April 11, 2006

Gratuitous use of terms like "asshat" and "fucktard".
posted by Gamblor at 9:39 AM on April 11, 2006

anything at all
posted by Sprocket at 9:40 AM on April 11, 2006

obligatory snark towards those who are less intelligent than us
posted by pyramid termite at 9:40 AM on April 11, 2006

solicitly begs a question
posted by found missing at 9:40 AM on April 11, 2006

Inline image that appears to be an utter non sequitur.
posted by CunningLinguist at 9:40 AM on April 11, 2006

Snarky subtextual commentary.
posted by Skygazer at 9:41 AM on April 11, 2006

Ascent to top of clocktower with sniper rifle.
posted by bondcliff at 9:42 AM on April 11, 2006

Original author of blog entry posting in-thread to let everyone know he's never heard of metafilter and thinks you're all a bunch of irritating snarkers.
posted by Baby_Balrog at 9:42 AM on April 11, 2006

Barely on-topic self link to personal blog.
posted by the_bone at 9:43 AM on April 11, 2006

Question regarding the likelihood of anyone reading the posts down here.
posted by Faint of Butt at 9:44 AM on April 11, 2006

MeTa
posted by the_bone at 9:44 AM on April 11, 2006

Long-awaited revelation of vast conspiracy to do evil revealed by some hardworking journalist, followed with flippant dismissals by readers who don't actually click the link but love using the phrase "tinfoil hat."
posted by digaman at 9:46 AM on April 11, 2006

Todd Lokken.
posted by tr33hggr at 9:46 AM on April 11, 2006

Assurance to FOB that I'm still reading and I thought his comment worthy of note.
posted by OmieWise at 9:46 AM on April 11, 2006

Obligatory "Why does X hate America" snark.
posted by the_bone at 9:46 AM on April 11, 2006

Statement linking the phrase "best of the web" to Cat-scan.com.
posted by goatdog at 9:48 AM on April 11, 2006

Flippant dismissal of digaman.
posted by CunningLinguist at 9:48 AM on April 11, 2006

New, improved goatse link.
posted by digaman at 9:50 AM on April 11, 2006

Mention of the having of cameras despite earlier mention of the having of cameras.
posted by jack_mo at 9:52 AM on April 11, 2006

picture of bunny with pancakes on its head
posted by pyramid termite at 9:52 AM on April 11, 2006

oolong.jpg
posted by the_bone at 9:53 AM on April 11, 2006

On not-preview, acknowledgement of earlier mention of the having of cameras.
posted by jack_mo at 9:53 AM on April 11, 2006

Public self-flagellation that pyramid termite beat me to the joke. Resolution to preview in the future.
posted by the_bone at 9:54 AM on April 11, 2006

Does anyone read the posts down here?
posted by kalimac at 9:54 AM on April 11, 2006

does anyone read the posts down here?
posted by 40 Watt at 9:54 AM on April 11, 2006

<BLINK>
posted by octothorpe at 9:55 AM on April 11, 2006

Ahhhhhhhhh! JINX! JINX!

*head asplodes*
posted by 40 Watt at 9:55 AM on April 11, 2006

Copy-paste of one of my own comments from six months ago in a marginally related thread, which I thought was brilliant and/or hilarious but which went completely unnoticed at the time.
posted by ook at 9:56 AM on April 11, 2006

Comment mocking a spelling error which itself contains a fairly obvious mispellign.
posted by the_bone at 9:57 AM on April 11, 2006

____ got pwned
posted by minkll at 9:59 AM on April 11, 2006

Snape kills Dumbledore
posted by BobFrapples at 10:03 AM on April 11, 2006

Soylent Green? People.
posted by 40 Watt at 10:03 AM on April 11, 2006

Complaint about the fact that blink/big/marquee tags no longer work.
posted by octothorpe at 10:04 AM on April 11, 2006

Request to Matt and/or Jessamyn that someone delete BobFrapples' spoiler.
posted by the_bone at 10:05 AM on April 11, 2006



if exsits (select * from FPP where id = 50817 and topic = 'Politics') then

   print (select top 1 quote from simpsons order by relevance desc)

else

   print (select top 1 quote from futurama order by relevance desc)



insert into Comments(value) values("its, it's, its'")



delete from Comments where topic = 50817 and  FlameOut=1

posted by blue_beetle at 10:05 AM on April 11, 2006

Metafilter: [something not so witty]
posted by dontoine at 10:06 AM on April 11, 2006

Comment about MeFi being America-centric.
posted by keijo at 10:06 AM on April 11, 2006

Statement that you misread the comment where I said you were a dangerous lunatic. It wasn't directed at you, honest.
posted by goatdog at 10:06 AM on April 11, 2006

MetaFilter: [Wit berating wit]
posted by Sprocket at 10:08 AM on April 11, 2006

Comment intended for a different thread altogether.
posted by 40 Watt at 10:08 AM on April 11, 2006

Apologies for that previous comment... it was supposed to be in a different thread altogether.
posted by 40 Watt at 10:09 AM on April 11, 2006

,/div style="position:relative; top: 300px">Post that tries to be really clever and annoying but which goes wrong when poster proves he can't type</div>
posted by twine42 at 10:09 AM on April 11, 2006

Uncharacteristicly short post that doesn't contain a somewhat off-topic story about myself.

Improbable marriage proposal for beth.
posted by loquacious at 10:10 AM on April 11, 2006

Wonder aloud if I can still get a PayPal refund from Kaycee Nicole.
posted by pineapple at 10:11 AM on April 11, 2006

Reference to a previously deleted comment that now makes no sense.
posted by CunningLinguist at 10:11 AM on April 11, 2006

Link to The Onion.
posted by the_bone at 10:13 AM on April 11, 2006

Callout for linking to the Onion.
posted by 40 Watt at 10:14 AM on April 11, 2006

post welcoming our marginally offensive pun overlords.
posted by ab3 at 10:14 AM on April 11, 2006

YouTube video vaguely about a similar subject.
posted by Sprocket at 10:15 AM on April 11, 2006

Claim that previous poster owes me a new keyboard, implying that previous poster's comment was so startlingly, explosively funny that I spat my beverage (either coffee or an unconventional soft drink) all over said keyboard, ruining it.

Even though all I did was chortle a bit.

Gratuitous extra-small post-script.
posted by gompa at 10:16 AM on April 11, 2006

Spells "America" with three k's, self-links, cackles with glee, mows lawn.
posted by milquetoast at 10:16 AM on April 11, 2006

                ////               (O O) --------oOO----(_)--------------- I           Correction          I I          directed at          I I          octothorpe          I ----------------------oOO--------              I__I__I               II II              ooO Ooo

posted by If I Had An Anus at 10:18 AM on April 11, 2006

Post which does nothing to maintain a healthy, respectful discussion by focusing on the issues, topics, and facts at hand -- not at other members of the site.

...milquetoast.
posted by 40 Watt at 10:19 AM on April 11, 2006

Comment which accidentally proves that this account is a sock-puppet for a much more prominent member of MeFi.
posted by OmieWise at 10:22 AM on April 11, 2006

posted by 40 Watt at 10:23 AM on April 11, 2006

Gleeful pointing out of sock puppet in case anyone missed it, to prove how smart poster is.
posted by CunningLinguist at 10:24 AM on April 11, 2006

Asks question: How is this thread not a hippo violation?
posted by found missing at 10:26 AM on April 11, 2006

Untoward revelation that poster is indeed naked, which has no direct relation to previously mentioned improbable marriage proposal.

Threatens to post pics of poster wearing nothing but phone headset and morning cigarette.
posted by loquacious at 10:27 AM on April 11, 2006

quote

Observation that quote is funny.
posted by grex at 10:28 AM on April 11, 2006

picture of tubgirl with photoshopped phone headset and morning cigarette
posted by pyramid termite at 10:31 AM on April 11, 2006

Announcing the pathetic strawman your opposing viewpoint mefite has so obviously built...and then grinding your axe so sharp the sparks start a(nother) flameout.
posted by Cedric at 10:32 AM on April 11, 2006

A mighty verbose comment regarding the history of texts of this nature, followed by several links to generic, online texts. Statement about their significance in forming culture and contributions to mainstream media. Criticism of apparent adoption in one or more administrations. Derail into ad hominem attack on current administration.

Course correcting statement to compensate for derail.

Some time ago this user observed application of generic statements under ideal conditions. Said observation led to a great deal of emotion. Due to these emotions, many people interacted. This incident was exciting!
posted by agent at 10:33 AM on April 11, 2006

What's a blog?
posted by effwerd at 10:34 AM on April 11, 2006

Giant dot signifying extended moment of silence.
posted by brain_drain at 10:37 AM on April 11, 2006

Comment defeating purpose of moment of silence.
posted by brain_drain at 10:38 AM on April 11, 2006

Newbie flameout of epic proportions. Disjointed, incoherent, self-obsessed ramblings, evoking images of a pop-eyed Kricfalusi cartoon character. Utterly empty legal threats. Pure ASCII pathos.

Secretly registers new username.
posted by milquetoast at 10:39 AM on April 11, 2006

Hunter told me I have AIDS.
posted by mazola at 10:40 AM on April 11, 2006

Plo chops.
posted by sharpener at 10:40 AM on April 11, 2006

Comment written in tone of ironic detachment, executed partially in l33t, that reflexively cites precedent and simultaneously nods to the previous citations made by earlier posters.
posted by safetyfork at 10:41 AM on April 11, 2006

Literally laughs out loud from deep within the belly and ends sentence an exclamation mark, an accidental numeral '1', and and another exclamation mark in reference to an insult of intelligence aimed at other posters.
*Inserts smiley face contrived of a colon followed by a right parenthesis to insinuate 'no hard feelings' *

*Hard feeling ensue*
posted by Sprocket at 10:42 AM on April 11, 2006

oh, snap
posted by paulsc at 10:43 AM on April 11, 2006

Failed attempt to post relevant link.
posted by Cironian at 10:44 AM on April 11, 2006

Hard feeling ensue

NSFW
posted by found missing at 10:44 AM on April 11, 2006

Hasselhoff.
posted by jonmc at 10:44 AM on April 11, 2006

Complaint about the lack of an edit post function.
posted by Cironian at 10:44 AM on April 11, 2006

Comment which describes a comment that is common on Metafilter.
posted by grex at 10:44 AM on April 11, 2006

Carries flameout to Meta, demands that Matt refund his $5, delete his account, delete all his comments and all comments that referred to his comments.
posted by octothorpe at 10:46 AM on April 11, 2006

Comment that the author swears is so good that someone on Metafilter will finally acknowledge his existence, but which will go ignored, but only because his wit is the result of his extreme intelligence that no one else on earth can match, and so he is destined to forever be alone, so who's smart now Mr. Smarty? Huh? WHO IS SMART NOW?!?!?!?!

{is ignored}
posted by ND¢ at 10:47 AM on April 11, 2006

posted by fire&wings at 10:51 AM on April 11, 2006

Not that I took offense from your comment (sensitive as I am), but someone might.

Just sayin'.
posted by al_fresco at 10:53 AM on April 11, 2006

decides reading this post is making him thirsty and opens bottle of deliciously refreshing PepsiBlue
posted by allaboutgeorge at 10:54 AM on April 11, 2006

Link to when kuro5hin did the same thing
posted by localroger at 10:54 AM on April 11, 2006

Hasselhoffian recursion smoking headphone cigarette tubgirl spewing geyser of mathowie-faced centipedes.
posted by loquacious at 10:55 AM on April 11, 2006

Complaint about arriving late to the party
posted by Joeforking at 10:56 AM on April 11, 2006

Announces departure from MetaFilter because it's just not fun anymore.
posted by brain_drain at 10:57 AM on April 11, 2006

Reflects on old gf named "Beth" and a scene involving white pull up socks, plaid skirt, Barney doll, and pickled herring. Thinks of consequences of engaging in dialogue..thinks of Barney doll..MeFi be damned!!!

Then posts " Hey Beth..great post..where you from?"
posted by Mr Bluesky at 10:57 AM on April 11, 2006

*returns immediately*
posted by brain_drain at 10:57 AM on April 11, 2006

prediction that this will end badly...
posted by sfts2 at 10:57 AM on April 11, 2006

Jesus god people these threads are NOT GOOD.
posted by kenko at 10:59 AM on April 11, 2006

Maintains a healthy, respectful discussion by focusing his comments on the issues, topics, and facts at hand -- not at other members of the site.
posted by octothorpe at 11:00 AM on April 11, 2006

*requests admin to hope him*
posted by pyramid termite at 11:00 AM on April 11, 2006

Flagged.
posted by mazola at 11:07 AM on April 11, 2006

Pepsi Blue
posted by hal9k at 11:11 AM on April 11, 2006

GRATUITOUS USE OF CAPSLOCK AND EXCLAMATION POINTS TO EMPHASIZE VEHEMENCE!!!!!!!!!!
posted by ereshkigal45 at 11:15 AM on April 11, 2006

MetaFilter: Jesus god people these threads are NOT GOOD.
posted by sparkletone at 11:19 AM on April 11, 2006

<img src="image_so_foul_and_disgusting_mathowie_considers_banning_the_img_tag_for_good.jpg">
posted by Sibrax at 11:20 AM on April 11, 2006

Narcissistic application of Old-skool HTML
posted by CynicalKnight at 11:25 AM on April 11, 2006

Admission to possession of the strings to SuckPoppet and BoyWithFez. Said admission made to assage guilt over having sock puppet accounts and placed in the midst of this thread because people are reading only for their own comments thus my crime against the community will go unpunished.
posted by Fezboy! at 11:25 AM on April 11, 2006

¡Sí Se Puede!

300!
posted by punkbitch at 11:29 AM on April 11, 2006

es decir...
posted by punkbitch at 11:29 AM on April 11, 2006

butts lmao
posted by keswick at 11:30 AM on April 11, 2006

Reminder that English is the language of Metafilter
posted by magpie68 at 11:33 AM on April 11, 2006

Desperate link to photo of self.
posted by George_Spiggott at 11:36 AM on April 11, 2006

Adding another post just for the hell of it
posted by Meccabilly at 11:36 AM on April 11, 2006

SHITCOCK!
posted by mr_crash_davis at 11:40 AM on April 11, 2006

Wondering about a moose.
posted by dwivian at 11:41 AM on April 11, 2006

Callout for sweeping generalization made in 5th comment.
posted by anthill at 11:41 AM on April 11, 2006

Refusal to acknowledge reasonable questions about unreasonable comments made earlier in thread.
posted by Buzz at 11:43 AM on April 11, 2006

*passes out*
posted by jonmc at 11:46 AM on April 11, 2006

slur.
heh heh heh.
posted by racist dunk-tank clown at 11:47 AM on April 11, 2006

Troll.
posted by MythMaker at 11:48 AM on April 11, 2006

kenko : "Jesus god people these threads are NOT GOOD."

Urges kenko to take it to MeTa.....realizes stupid generic thread will continue MeTa or no.
posted by graventy at 11:51 AM on April 11, 2006

Picture of other rabbit.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 11:55 AM on April 11, 2006

MeTa.
posted by keswick at 11:57 AM on April 11, 2006

herf, derf, butter eater.
posted by whatnot at 11:58 AM on April 11, 2006

....I don't get it.
posted by public at 11:59 AM on April 11, 2006

Unwarranted prediction that thread will reach 1000 comments.
posted by loquacious at 12:00 PM on April 11, 2006

Smug complaint that MetaFilter gets worse every day.
posted by hellbient at 12:00 PM on April 11, 2006

Gratuitous second post to inflate contribution index.
posted by loquacious at 12:00 PM on April 11, 2006

Random, anonymous punch thrown at hellbient's area.
posted by loquacious at 12:01 PM on April 11, 2006

picture of trainwreck or dead horse.
posted by AJaffe at 12:04 PM on April 11, 2006

Veiled, technically deniable sexist comment.
posted by George_Spiggott at 12:04 PM on April 11, 2006

*violently shits tapeworm*
posted by jefbla at 12:05 PM on April 11, 2006

Truly, this is the best of the web.
posted by keijo at 12:06 PM on April 11, 2006

Randomly yells SCIENCE.
posted by SteveInMaine at 12:06 PM on April 11, 2006

Makes up with hellbient before the confusion wears off and outrage sets in, makes out.
posted by loquacious at 12:08 PM on April 11, 2006

9th gratuitous use of the word Gratuitous(10th) in this thread.
posted by Sprocket at 12:08 PM on April 11, 2006

This thread looks so much better in an Opera^TM browser.
posted by digaman at 12:09 PM on April 11, 2006

This thread looks so much more fun drunk.
posted by keijo at 12:10 PM on April 11, 2006

meme.
posted by mazola at 12:12 PM on April 11, 2006

Generic comment from generic commenter.
posted by arcticwoman at 12:12 PM on April 11, 2006

Gratuitous (11th) generic followup.
posted by arcticwoman at 12:13 PM on April 11, 2006

self-conscious use of <small> tag to suggest a certain sotto voce wryness.
posted by cortex at 12:14 PM on April 11, 2006

comment encouraging hellbient to ignore loquacious
posted by hellbient at 12:15 PM on April 11, 2006

smileychewtrain wins.
posted by jlkr at 12:15 PM on April 11, 2006

request for someone to explain this post to user because they can't be bothered.
posted by hellbient at 12:18 PM on April 11, 2006

Runs out of popcorn. Goes out for a mid-afternoon coffee.
posted by octothorpe at 12:21 PM on April 11, 2006

Ominous warning to Fezboy! that no admission goes unoticed.

Self-congratulatory revelling in bully-like behaviour.
posted by raedyn at 12:23 PM on April 11, 2006

Immediate self-effacing correction to previous typo.
posted by raedyn at 12:24 PM on April 11, 2006

[Comment citing 'comment deleted' deleted for redundancy due to previous 'deleted comment' comment.]
posted by Blue Stone at 12:28 PM on April 11, 2006

MetaFilter: Meta filter.
posted by sellout at 12:29 PM on April 11, 2006

340?

Roast Beef.
posted by Drexen at 12:30 PM on April 11, 2006

posted by brownpau at 12:33 PM on April 11, 2006

Scrolls sideways to view entire picture.
posted by Sprocket at 12:35 PM on April 11, 2006

That GIF might have been the straw that jumped over the shark's back.
posted by digaman at 12:37 PM on April 11, 2006

Comment made solely to remove annoying gif from My Comments page.
posted by cortex at 12:43 PM on April 11, 2006

Observation that one of the above comments is from the subject of the link in question, and exclamation about how cool that is. Suggestion that Mathowie should therefore add this to the front page sidebar.
posted by nthdegx at 12:43 PM on April 11, 2006

Comment designed to be subtle but which is a transparent attempt to get my name into the thread.
posted by OmieWise at 12:44 PM on April 11, 2006

Multiple
posted by raedyn at 12:44 PM on April 11, 2006

content-free
posted by raedyn at 12:45 PM on April 11, 2006

comments
posted by raedyn at 12:45 PM on April 11, 2006

intended
posted by raedyn at 12:45 PM on April 11, 2006

only to
posted by raedyn at 12:45 PM on April 11, 2006

bump
posted by raedyn at 12:45 PM on April 11, 2006

big
posted by raedyn at 12:46 PM on April 11, 2006

image
posted by raedyn at 12:46 PM on April 11, 2006

off
posted by raedyn at 12:46 PM on April 11, 2006

mycomments
posted by raedyn at 12:46 PM on April 11, 2006

Meta-comment designed to fit in with the proceedings but written in role-play-esque present tense rather than noun-like non-sentence which consequently falls flat on its arse.
posted by nthdegx at 12:47 PM on April 11, 2006

Lame reworking of the phrase "the pot calling the kettle black" directed at an earlier poster.
posted by gubo at 12:49 PM on April 11, 2006

Comment admiring the unusually large number of comments, with reference to the fact that said comment increases the number of comments even more.
posted by ook at 12:49 PM on April 11, 2006

Disgruntled addmission of lack of word-smithing skillz.
posted by raedyn at 12:50 PM on April 11, 2006

Parenthetical note that the word "comment," if repeated enough times, becomes funny.
posted by ook at 12:50 PM on April 11, 2006

Prissy white-guilt request that pot call kettle African American.
posted by cortex at 12:51 PM on April 11, 2006

Throws hissy-fit because the "." question remains unanswered!!1!!!11!1!
posted by deborah at 12:51 PM on April 11, 2006

Impassioned insistence that a return to the topic at hand would behoove us all.
posted by OmieWise at 12:52 PM on April 11, 2006

Third comment in as many minutes, explicitly referencing intention to pad the number of comments in the thread.
posted by ook at 12:52 PM on April 11, 2006

*described imaginary action*
posted by nuala at 12:55 PM on April 11, 2006

Deliberately amusing false answer to the "." question.
posted by nthdegx at 12:56 PM on April 11, 2006

Badger Badger Badger

mushroom mushroom
posted by ninjew at 12:57 PM on April 11, 2006

comment about how great/horrible The Smiths or The Cure are.
posted by hellbient at 12:59 PM on April 11, 2006

obligatory paging of jonmc to aisle #50817 because of Smiths/Cure comment
posted by hellbient at 1:00 PM on April 11, 2006

Avoids work.
posted by strangeleftydoublethink at 1:01 PM on April 11, 2006

Outraged comparison between FPP topic and Hitler

Tedious mention of Godwin and his law...
posted by Miko at 1:01 PM on April 11, 2006

...Followed by argument about whether original Usenet tradition demanded that the one who introduced Hitler lost the argument or not.
posted by Miko at 1:02 PM on April 11, 2006

Creatively obnoxious memorializing (of) meaningless, entertaining 'net thread.
posted by arto at 1:03 PM on April 11, 2006

Comment revealing that its author has not looked at link at all.
posted by Miko at 1:08 PM on April 11, 2006

obligatory comment about how Morrissey/Robert Smith has a long way to go before he's the beginnings of a pimple on Handsome Dick Manitoba/Joey Ramone/Debbie Harry/Johnny Thunders's left buttcheek.
posted by jonmc at 1:09 PM on April 11, 2006

Comment remarking on the number of comments in thread.
posted by milkrate at 1:09 PM on April 11, 2006

Questioning of whether this is a HIPAA violation.
posted by zabuni at 1:12 PM on April 11, 2006

Dorky hubris recognizing each and every mefi for being special and unique beings at the very forefront of human evolution.

Awww...
posted by Skygazer at 1:12 PM on April 11, 2006

Recycles your old gold
posted by Cranberry at 1:13 PM on April 11, 2006

REDUNDANT PORTABELLO SCIENCE
posted by loquacious at 1:19 PM on April 11, 2006

This thread is a HIPPA Violation!
posted by blasdelf at 1:20 PM on April 11, 2006

Dorky hubris recognizing each and every mefi for being special and unique beings at the very left buttcheek of human evolution.

Why do punk rock guys go out with new wave girls?
posted by Skygazer at 1:20 PM on April 11, 2006

Notes that two other posters have made the HIPAA reference already.
posted by ereshkigal45 at 1:20 PM on April 11, 2006

Snake!
posted by sfts2 at 1:20 PM on April 11, 2006

Uses recycled gold to build a brazen altar for this thread.
posted by Sprocket at 1:21 PM on April 11, 2006

Last comment!
posted by NotMyselfRightNow at 1:23 PM on April 11, 2006

Late comment repeating earlier derail.
posted by Pollomacho at 1:24 PM on April 11, 2006

Comment about immanent close of this thread.
posted by oddman at 1:26 PM on April 11, 2006

Notation of missed mefite.
posted by If I Had An Anus at 1:26 PM on April 11, 2006

Annoyance that someone beat me to the punch.
posted by blasdelf at 1:27 PM on April 11, 2006

Snarky comment admonishing particpants for having too much time on their hands/no life.

*Continues reading*
posted by sharpener at 1:29 PM on April 11, 2006

offhanded attempt to slip ridiculous neologisms into a flashthread
posted by blackfly at 1:30 PM on April 11, 2006

I'd hit it.
posted by piratebowling at 1:30 PM on April 11, 2006

Realization that this thread will go on forever since no one will bother to read all the responses so far given, and jokes will inevitably be repeated, as has already occurred.
posted by beth at 1:31 PM on April 11, 2006

Declaration that "offhanded" is not a word; suggestion that beth just hush up.
posted by cortex at 1:32 PM on April 11, 2006

Comentario hecho usando programa lousy de la traducción de la lengua.
posted by ?! at 1:33 PM on April 11, 2006

This thread is in violation of HIPAA SCIENCE PANTSFISH.
posted by loquacious at 1:33 PM on April 11, 2006

Reminder that thread closes in 30 days.
*wonders why that is*
posted by If I Had An Anus at 1:34 PM on April 11, 2006

Painfully unfunny rendition of inside joke commonly used on an entirely different community site, ending in the word "Profit!"
posted by davejay at 1:38 PM on April 11, 2006

tiny mention of thing I neglected to mention in previous post, even after previewing
posted by davejay at 1:39 PM on April 11, 2006

fjaKe typos BeCauser i amm sooo fukcin drunk!
posted by mortisimo at 1:39 PM on April 11, 2006

Celebration of a possible uprising of the Vikings.
posted by raedyn at 1:40 PM on April 11, 2006

Longboat lurker wonders where longboat is these days.
posted by ereshkigal45 at 1:43 PM on April 11, 2006

link to dictionary made without previous thought or preparation
posted by blackfly at 1:43 PM on April 11, 2006

Because April has 30 days, that's why.
posted by Cranberry at 1:43 PM on April 11, 2006

Uses current thread as bible for new religion and urges others to follow.
posted by Sprocket at 1:44 PM on April 11, 2006

Pained observation of unironic use of phrase 'FPP post' in unrelated thread.
posted by cortex at 1:44 PM on April 11, 2006

Directs ereshkigal45 to pier 11544
posted by Cranberry at 1:45 PM on April 11, 2006

Complaint that someone two hundred comments earlier misused "straw man" as well as "begging the question."
posted by booksandlibretti at 1:48 PM on April 11, 2006

Thanks cranberry.
posted by ereshkigal45 at 1:50 PM on April 11, 2006

Comment berating friendly, non-judgmental, non-homophobic, non-sexist Christians for not standing up more to refute the near-constant vociferous bleatings of the other kind of Christian.
posted by beth at 1:50 PM on April 11, 2006

Stop shitting in the thread! It was just gettin interesting!
posted by keijo at 1:52 PM on April 11, 2006

That was supoosed to have a g. No, an apostrophe. No, a colon. No, make it a semicolon.
posted by keijo at 1:52 PM on April 11, 2006

Wonders what HIPAA is.
posted by Skygazer at 1:53 PM on April 11, 2006

What's all this about IIHAA then?
posted by If I Had An Anus at 1:54 PM on April 11, 2006

Hmm. Looked fine in preview.
posted by mazola at 1:54 PM on April 11, 2006

I Claim this thread for the glory of Tollcross.
posted by sgt.serenity at 1:54 PM on April 11, 2006

Statement of opinion as fact.

Complex, multi-paragraph statement of thesis (relying on evidence which previous posters in the thread have definitively proven false,) posted in apparent ignorance of all prior discussion on the topic.

Quote pulled from a comment which was posted six hours ago, excerpted out of context to place the original idea in the worst possible light.

Straw-man response to mischaracterization of earlier argument.

continuation of quote from same previous comment, containing inconsequential speling error

Rebuttal of comment, relying on restatement of opinion as fact. Suggestion that earlier commenter's inability to spell implies ignorance of the topic at hand.

Quote from a completely different comment upthread, posted by another user

Rebuttal of comment which fails to differentiate between the two users quoted, which begins with the phrase "with all due respect," and which is phrased in such a way as to convey an absolute lack of respect.

Stray sentence fragment apparently missed during preview of

Multi-paragraph, expletive-laden restatement of original thesis. Link to vaguely related news story written by an obviously biased news source. Citation of hastily-googled survey statistics in support of thesis. Link to White House press gaggle transcript.

Assertion that all those who disagree with thesis are trolling.

Demand that all readers immediately contact their congressperson in support of thesis. Assertion that right-thinking Americans will take to the streets regarding the issue, any day now. Use of bold type to emphasize restatement of opinion as fact. Statement of intention to stockpile food and/or purchase firearm.

Humorous aside in small type.
posted by ook at 1:59 PM on April 11, 2006

Alleged, contested attribution of words of Bret Easton Ellis to Nikki Craft.
posted by cortex at 2:00 PM on April 11, 2006

Correction to inconsequential spelling error buried in third paragraph of previous comment.
posted by ook at 2:01 PM on April 11, 2006

Unnecessary clarification of "previous comment" to mean the comment before that.
posted by ook at 2:01 PM on April 11, 2006

Right? Right?
posted by disclaimer at 2:02 PM on April 11, 2006

Damnation of sgt.serenity for claiming thread first.

*declares that all who read this just lost the game*
posted by If I Had An Anus at 2:05 PM on April 11, 2006

First!
posted by slimepuppy at 2:06 PM on April 11, 2006

Fat people, SUVs, jocks, rape. Joke about black people. Blinking text?
posted by geoff. at 2:07 PM on April 11, 2006

Bull headed obtuse opinion with many obscure legal precedents for support and a thinly disguised politcal agenda parading as "a battle of ideas" in response to ook.
posted by Skygazer at 2:07 PM on April 11, 2006

Picture of third and final rabbit.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 2:08 PM on April 11, 2006

Immediate rebuttal of Skygazer's opinion out of hand, failing to address any specific points. Repeated, frequent reloading of page while awaiting further responses.
posted by ook at 2:10 PM on April 11, 2006

I lurve Peep art!
posted by ereshkigal45 at 2:10 PM on April 11, 2006

Notes that previous post was meant for completely different thread. Hangs head in shame.
posted by ereshkigal45 at 2:11 PM on April 11, 2006

.
posted by yeoz at 2:15 PM on April 11, 2006

FWIW, IMHO blahblahblahblahblahblahblah
blahblahblahblahblahblahblah
blahblahblahblahblahblahblah
blahblahblahblahblahblahblah
blahblahblahblahblahblahblah
blahblahblahblahblahblahblah
blahblahblahblahblahblahblah
blahblahblahblahblahblahblah.
YMMV.
posted by hellbient at 2:17 PM on April 11, 2006

interesting
posted by eyeballkid at 2:18 PM on April 11, 2006

Macho strutting masquerading as feigned indifference with an underlying subtext of superiority towards "ook" and his "ideas".
posted by Skygazer at 2:21 PM on April 11, 2006

Cycles along union canal in meta-pilgrimage.
posted by sgt.serenity at 2:22 PM on April 11, 2006

Careful deconstruction of single most-easily refuted point in Skygazer's last post, expressed with maximum contempt. Hand-waving glossing over of all other points. Continued reloading of page.
posted by ook at 2:25 PM on April 11, 2006

Reloads page nervously awaiting a response one minute after posting comment.
posted by Skygazer at 2:25 PM on April 11, 2006

ook wins.
posted by anthill at 2:26 PM on April 11, 2006

Digs in heels and misses the salient point completely. Wonders if ook is gay.
posted by Skygazer at 2:28 PM on April 11, 2006

Reference to a previously deleted comment that now makes no sense.

posted by CunningLinguist at 10:11 AM PST on April 11 [!]

Bafflement expressed.
posted by dontoine at 2:28 PM on April 11, 2006

Triumphal latching on to expression of support from third party. Restatement of opinion as fact.
posted by ook at 2:28 PM on April 11, 2006

Tells anthill to "stuff it".
posted by Skygazer at 2:29 PM on April 11, 2006

Denies bladder of relief in favor of patiently awaiting for amuzing comments. Finds humor in original misspelling of bladder as 'blatter.' Wonders why 'T' was typed instead 'D,' and if it means something more, then stops caring altogether.
posted by Sprocket at 2:30 PM on April 11, 2006

Speculation about how well this will end.
posted by brundlefly at 2:32 PM on April 11, 2006

...with a whimper?
posted by slimepuppy at 2:33 PM on April 11, 2006

["Image removed due to high-bandwidth usage" graphic]
posted by brundlefly at 2:34 PM on April 11, 2006

Suggestion that Skygazer perform anatomical impossibility.
posted by ook at 2:34 PM on April 11, 2006

Suggestion that things fall apart; further suggestion that the centre cannot hold.
posted by cortex at 2:41 PM on April 11, 2006

Belated apology for insult. Acknowledgement that issue is "complex," couched in terms maximally supportive of original thesis. Halfhearted statement of partial agreement with Skygazer's least-easily-refuted point. Weary agreement with Cortex.

Statement of intention to purchase malted beverage for Skygazer at unspecified future time.
posted by ook at 2:43 PM on April 11, 2006

Suggestion that the poster make better use or more responsible of the tagging feature.
posted by milkrate at 2:44 PM on April 11, 2006

Closes blink tag from way upthread since no one else had the kindness.
posted by emelenjr at 2:47 PM on April 11, 2006

Statement posted for the sole reason of being part of this thread.
posted by Bort at 2:49 PM on April 11, 2006

Clarification that my son is also named Bort.
posted by cortex at 2:50 PM on April 11, 2006

Wow.
posted by srboisvert at 2:51 PM on April 11, 2006

Skygazer confirms that aforementioned "anatomical impossibility", is practiced on a frequent basis with the enthusiastic assistance of ooks maternal progenitor. ~wink~ and procedes to admonish ook for being anti-intellectual and the ruiner of all things good on Metafilter with his sophomoric ad hominem behavior.

*Hops on high horse and rides off towards country manor with nose in the air*
posted by Skygazer at 2:54 PM on April 11, 2006

Belatedly notices ooks attempt at making nice, admits that perhaps further thought should be given to the issue and takes up offer for a malted beverage at "unspecified future" time.
posted by Skygazer at 2:59 PM on April 11, 2006

obligatory "meh"
posted by minkll at 3:05 PM on April 11, 2006

WHAT...

THE...

FUCK...

[TOPIC]????
posted by malthas at 3:09 PM on April 11, 2006

Request to return the discussion back to the important matters.
posted by Sprocket at 3:14 PM on April 11, 2006

My eyes!
posted by mleonard at 3:17 PM on April 11, 2006

pointless comment.
posted by delmoi at 3:23 PM on April 11, 2006

Assertion without evidence that previous comment was work of multiple authors.
posted by cortex at 3:27 PM on April 11, 2006

MetaFilter: Something said earlier in this thread.
posted by oaf at 3:29 PM on April 11, 2006

Hidden link to goatse under comment "What, it's 2006 already?" Always too late.
posted by Laotic at 3:32 PM on April 11, 2006

Apology for including a second goatse link in one thread.
posted by Laotic at 3:35 PM on April 11, 2006

shameless attention-seeking
posted by Blue Stone at 3:36 PM on April 11, 2006

Self-flagellation that I didn't discover this thread before it had 400 comments.

Response to one of first 20 comments.

Response to another one of first 20 comments.

Response to comment between #21 and #50

Response to comment between #51 and #100

Response to comment made while I was writing these responses that I caught in preview.

Note that I may not be up to date with last 100 comments.

Expression of confusion.

Suggestion to Matt that thread comments should be numbered for cases like this.
posted by wendell at 3:36 PM on April 11, 2006

As long as somebody else did it first, self-link.
posted by wendell at 3:38 PM on April 11, 2006

Heart-wrenching admission of traumatic and emotionally-scarring life-experience, which has, however, imbued some strength whilst leaving its mark, that is only tangentally on-topic, is unhelpful in moving the discussion forward, but which is a necessary personal act from a heart which is crying within and craving witness.

And which is ignored by all subsequent posters.
posted by Blue Stone at 3:43 PM on April 11, 2006

random, unmotivated Lebowski quote, Dude.
posted by dragstroke at 3:44 PM on April 11, 2006

Slightly repetitive comment mixing fact and opinion that will be ignored by just about everyone.
posted by Dreama at 3:48 PM on April 11, 2006

allegation of copyright infringement
posted by Blue Stone at 3:49 PM on April 11, 2006

Unnecessary chiming in of 'Me Too!'.
posted by mazola at 3:50 PM on April 11, 2006

Responds to Wendell and half a dozen other comments by cherry-picking easily-rebutted sentence fragments and ignoring the main points.
posted by George_Spiggott at 3:51 PM on April 11, 2006

Acknowledgement that rate of additional comments being added has dropped 90+% since I added my first comment.

Insistance that I am not paranoid.
posted by wendell at 3:52 PM on April 11, 2006

explodes in apoplectic rage at self-link
posted by keswick at 3:55 PM on April 11, 2006

Self-depreciating realization of being late to the party.
posted by id at 4:02 PM on April 11, 2006

Toynbee ideas in cine 2001 ressussitar morto sul planeta Jupiter!
posted by roboto at 4:03 PM on April 11, 2006

This is the title of this story, which is also found several times in the story itself.
posted by kyrademon at 4:03 PM on April 11, 2006

Comes home from work many hours later and at first thinks that the thread has deteriorated past the point of no return but then realizes that it's no worse than it started out this morning.
posted by octothorpe at 4:05 PM on April 11, 2006

Biting snark that reveals I haven't bothered to read the linked content.
posted by syzygy at 4:06 PM on April 11, 2006

Stunning rebuttal to the effect that as a percentage of GDP the thread sucks far less than most.
posted by George_Spiggott at 4:09 PM on April 11, 2006

Takes a potshot at the magic #500
posted by UbuRoivas at 4:15 PM on April 11, 2006

Geeky meta-pondering about possible existence of hard limit on number of responses in MeFi threads. N00b anxiety about whether or not old-time MeFiers already know the answer to this question. Wave of inertia overcoming me as I ponder asking a question about in it MeTa, which would "out" me as an anxious n00b. Better just to observe.
posted by digaman at 4:21 PM on April 11, 2006

.
posted by spock at 4:25 PM on April 11, 2006

N00bs up and down thread, causing oldsters to turn on the fire-hose
posted by supercrayon at 4:26 PM on April 11, 2006

Snarky comment that this was already said much earlier in the comments.
posted by spock at 4:26 PM on April 11, 2006

Annoyingly excessive ironic usage of the terms "internets" and "interweb".
posted by JT at 4:27 PM on April 11, 2006

posted by brain_drain at 4:35 PM on April 11, 2006

thread jack
posted by Blue Stone at 4:35 PM on April 11, 2006

Lamentation about arriving late to the party, but participates largely to satiate the need to participate.

Josh approves.
posted by Effigy2000 at 4:35 PM on April 11, 2006

I love that sense of power.
posted by digaman at 4:39 PM on April 11, 2006

The number of comments in this thread exceeds the number of comments on past thread about tragic incident. Question regarding what that tells us about selves.
posted by snofoam at 4:43 PM on April 11, 2006

ALL YOUR THREAD ARE BELONG TO US!!!!11!!11!!!!1
posted by zoogleplex at 4:43 PM on April 11, 2006

Statement that I most certainly do not dance when I go to concerts.
posted by Football Bat at 4:45 PM on April 11, 2006

2nd post quickly following first post adding something meant to be included in original post but which I forgot to add.

Blames ParisParasmus for something because he's a conservative.
posted by Effigy2000 at 4:46 PM on April 11, 2006

Whinge about how MeFi becomes more like fark every day now that Matt took his $5.00 from all those newbies.
posted by ZenMasterThis at 4:51 PM on April 11, 2006

posted by ninjew at 4:51 PM on April 11, 2006

I GOT NUMBER 500! I GOT NUMBER 500!
posted by ZenMasterThis at 4:52 PM on April 11, 2006

Assertion of tangential position that may relate to FPP but is in all likelihood merely an indication poster enjoys sound of self typing.
posted by Sparx at 4:55 PM on April 11, 2006

Dude, [that viral meme reference] is so 1999.
posted by zoogleplex at 4:56 PM on April 11, 2006

Was this really teh thread's first use of teh?
posted by If I Had An Anus at 4:56 PM on April 11, 2006

this is so lame it's cool, but becoming so cool that it's getting kind of lame again, which sort of still makes it cool. in a way.

fuckshit.
posted by dopamine at 5:01 PM on April 11, 2006

Reminder that, as Caucasian heterosexual members of the lumpen bourgeoisie (or the equivalent), you'll never really "get it."
posted by digaman at 5:02 PM on April 11, 2006

goatse
posted by Joseph Gurl at 5:04 PM on April 11, 2006

Seemingly liberal statement which is, nonetheless, as bigotted and close-minded as previous right-wing statement to which it is a rebuttal.
posted by Blue Stone at 5:05 PM on April 11, 2006

Complaint that I'm working too hard to have fun any more.

You bastards!
posted by yhbc at 5:07 PM on April 11, 2006

link to torrent of this thread.
posted by Blue Stone at 5:11 PM on April 11, 2006

Unrelated link to a one-eyed, noseless kitten now embalmed...for religious reasons...Appropriate gasps of horror and disbelief.
posted by annieb at 5:12 PM on April 11, 2006

Screams at Joseph Gurl for not putting a large flashing NSFW before, during, and after his post.
posted by Secret Life of Gravy at 5:15 PM on April 11, 2006

Get a Mac!!!
posted by zoogleplex at 5:18 PM on April 11, 2006

Stirring rendition of "This is the song that never ends."
posted by spiderwire at 5:18 PM on April 11, 2006

...continuation of aforementioned song.
posted by spiderwire at 5:19 PM on April 11, 2006

Blames the corporations.
posted by Blue Stone at 5:27 PM on April 11, 2006

Way late and inexplicably vicious bizarro-world-pedant attack on mr_crash_davis for not deliberately misspelling SHITCOCK!, leading to angry words and hurt feelings for months to come.
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 5:27 PM on April 11, 2006

won't someone please stop this madness?
posted by bluesky43 at 5:29 PM on April 11, 2006

Comment which feigns interruption of network transmission to humourous effect.
posted by Blue Stone at 5:32 PM on April 11, 2006

Wonders why everyone but him hates our troops. Pleads that someone think of the children.
posted by Effigy2000 at 5:36 PM on April 11, 2006

banana hammock
posted by cccorlew at 5:38 PM on April 11, 2006

obscure comment, read only by its writer
posted by swift at 5:40 PM on April 11, 2006

Gevivnyyl rapelcgrq frys-ersreevat wbxr.
posted by Blue Stone at 5:43 PM on April 11, 2006

Confusing, though slightly amusing, post which attempts to de-scramble Blue Stone's post into a series of vaguely meaningful English phrases.

LOL!
posted by zoogleplex at 5:48 PM on April 11, 2006

Fruitless attempt to make a reasoned claim which will add further depth to the thread and mitigate reconciliation between two polarized groups in an already heated, futile debate.
posted by Colloquial Collision at 5:56 PM on April 11, 2006

Apology for an obvious, but unforeseen misinterpretation of the above post.
posted by Colloquial Collision at 5:56 PM on April 11, 2006

posted by maxreax at 5:56 PM on April 11, 2006

Kudos.
posted by Gator at 6:04 PM on April 11, 2006

Coming to the thread too late, being motivated about a comment early on, skipping most of the comments to post a reply to the comment

Then worrying that someone on the comments you have skipped has made the same comment.
posted by Samuel Farrow at 6:14 PM on April 11, 2006

Kottke.
posted by gleuschk at 6:24 PM on April 11, 2006

Coral cache of your mom.
posted by loquacious at 6:26 PM on April 11, 2006

Apologizes for munging previous link, correct link here.
posted by loquacious at 6:27 PM on April 11, 2006

Bukottke.
posted by loquacious at 6:28 PM on April 11, 2006

You forgot Poland.
posted by exlotuseater at 6:31 PM on April 11, 2006

The thread that ate its tail.

Where OCD sufferers participate in binary circle jerk to a point that letters become eroded from keyboard.
posted by Mr Bluesky at 6:35 PM on April 11, 2006

Compulsion to comment again even though there's nothing new to say.
posted by BuddhaInABucket at 7:11 PM on April 11, 2006

Am I late? What did I miss?
posted by bright cold day at 7:23 PM on April 11, 2006

Just think of all the poor nameless electrons that have given their lives in this insanity!!!! Well not all were nameles, there was one I named Sparky that helped make up the letter "u" in the word "Just" at the first of this sentence. But he's gone now.
posted by BillsR100 at 7:28 PM on April 11, 2006

The thread that ate its tail.

Outrage!
posted by CynicalKnight at 7:34 PM on April 11, 2006

Gevivnyyl rapelcgrq frys-ersreevat wbxr

Kicks self for actually googling rot13 translator to find out post says.

Notes that goatse has been mentioned four times in this thread.
posted by ereshkigal45 at 7:55 PM on April 11, 2006

Motherfuckin' use of the word "motherfucker", solely intended to invoke motherfuckin' the spirit of Samuel L. Jackson.
posted by o0o0o at 8:01 PM on April 11, 2006

Applause
posted by Skygazer at 8:05 PM on April 11, 2006

Masturbatory missile toe
flung at unsuspecting camel toe
in the front row, every one.
posted by If I Had An Anus at 8:09 PM on April 11, 2006

Inappropriate story about sharing a hot tub with subject of post.
posted by LarryC at 8:15 PM on April 11, 2006

arrogant assertion pitched just exactly to rile while seeming reasonable.
posted by bonaldi at 8:26 PM on April 11, 2006

Arriving late to the party, ignoring most posts already made and coming up with the same points. Insightful comment that sheds light on the whole thing but comes too late.
posted by mikeh at 8:36 PM on April 11, 2006

Ridiculous and only vaguely-related post consisting only of quote (or paraphrase of quote) from The Simpsons or Futurama.
posted by Dreama at 8:36 PM on April 11, 2006

long winded confessional and anecdotal post which inspires half of the ensuing posters to suggest that i should get my own blog when i already have one and people quit reading it eons ago because life is short and art is long but jackie gleason was shorter, which reminds me of something i've always wondered about - why do hot dogs come in packages of 10 when hot dog buns come in packages of 8? considers conspiracy as reason for this, realizes that a good part of the people reading this are probably part of the conspiracy, looks up at sky for chemtrails, inspects local skyscrapers for signs of installed explosives, buys bars of gold to bury under fallout shelter, busily starts making a lifetime supply of tin foil hats only to realize upon making the 143rd that i bought aluminum foil instead and it just won't work, resolves to tell everyone on metafilter exactly what the voices the foil was supposed to stop have been telling him to do, gets drunk on old overholt and mad dog 20/20, spew vomit on screeen and thinks it's a distinct improvement, wakes up in morning claiming it was all a nightmare caused by net.persecution and stalking and makes new resolution to tell everyone the TRUTH about subliminal advertising, wonders on way to that big castle on the third hill if the nice young men in those big white coats will let him have computer access in the rubber room, reflects that it's all dick cheney's fault anyway, hatches plot to train birds to fight back and is never heard from again from anyone except the orderlies
posted by pyramid termite at 8:39 PM on April 11, 2006

realizes that his lack of pronoun consistency is probably due to incipient schizophrenia
posted by pyramid termite at 8:40 PM on April 11, 2006

Approximately the 548th comment.
posted by moonbird at 8:41 PM on April 11, 2006

Expression of astonishment that somehow Timecube hasn't been mentioned yet.
posted by beth at 8:52 PM on April 11, 2006

observes that we are all educated stupid
posted by pyramid termite at 8:54 PM on April 11, 2006

Sweet weeping christ, this is the most comments ever.
One would never have guessed there would be so many cliche comments for us to post! (sorry for jumping out of form. I'm late anyway)
posted by Parannoyed at 8:57 PM on April 11, 2006

FPP flagged as noise. I'd like to add that I consider every comment in this thread "noise", including this one. Can we have a way to flag a whole thread at once?
posted by davy at 9:00 PM on April 11, 2006

X ON A Y!
posted by Afroblanco at 9:18 PM on April 11, 2006

Snakes on a plane?

Plants in a frame?

Kids at a game?
posted by JB71 at 9:23 PM on April 11, 2006

Self-referential comment about comment vagueness.
posted by Citizen Premier at 9:33 PM on April 11, 2006

[Goes to bed already.]
posted by ereshkigal45 at 9:37 PM on April 11, 2006

Shakespearean reference to last days of Rome with sidebar to poem by W.B. Yeats, embers, and death.

Buyashaka!!
Links to Ali G WAV found on 19 yr old fansite owned by Peter Noddin in Luton England
posted by Mr Bluesky at 9:41 PM on April 11, 2006

Comment remembering some great INTE RNATIONAL CA PS LOCK DAY posts.
posted by spiderskull at 9:42 PM on April 11, 2006

.
posted by Jerub at 9:49 PM on April 11, 2006

The link that will actually sum this all up. . .. .

Unfortunately with a blown ahref> tag
posted by Danf at 9:49 PM on April 11, 2006

Looking for a girl named Sue. Met her at a Dead show in 1982. I think it was in Chicago. May have been in Portland though. Memory is a little fuzzy. She had long blondish hair. Went by the nickname Lil Dancing Bearbie. She said she was from California. If anyone knows her whereabouts contact me asap.
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 9:50 PM on April 11, 2006

Talks like a pirate.
posted by LarryC at 9:51 PM on April 11, 2006

woof
posted by scalespace at 9:54 PM on April 11, 2006

Apologizes for the double/triple/quad posts for anyone on Craigslist, MySpace, or Onion Personals, before realizing that girl named Sue was really a boy.
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 9:55 PM on April 11, 2006

[this is awesome]
posted by tsarfan at 10:06 PM on April 11, 2006

Comment meant to derail finds itself on wrong track.
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 10:08 PM on April 11, 2006

Oh for God's sake... Pike.
posted by mazola at 10:12 PM on April 11, 2006

EVERY DAY IS TALK LIKE A CAPSLOCK DAY
posted by loquacious at 10:15 PM on April 11, 2006

Still avoiding work.
posted by strangeleftydoublethink at 10:24 PM on April 11, 2006

wry observation
posted by mert at 10:34 PM on April 11, 2006

,
posted by mildred-pitt at 10:34 PM on April 11, 2006

Pointing out of usage guidelines on comments:

note: Help maintain a healthy, respectful discussion by focusing comments on the issues, topics, and facts at hand -- not at other members of the site.
posted by spiderskull at 10:47 PM on April 11, 2006

Throws in a bucket o' cocks.
posted by sharpener at 10:51 PM on April 11, 2006

What, no "summary marks?"
posted by Space Kitty at 11:29 PM on April 11, 2006

Comment that realizes this thread shall never end. Also, I'm not giving a dime to that Kottke asswipe.
posted by jefbla at 11:46 PM on April 11, 2006

ooh can i join in ?
posted by oliyoung at 11:59 PM on April 11, 2006

No.
posted by brundlefly at 12:29 AM on April 12, 2006

Okay. Yeah. Knock yourself out! Weeeeeeeee!
posted by brundlefly at 12:29 AM on April 12, 2006

Comments just to acknowledge that he's the first to comment after midnight in his timezone. The new day brings him this knowledge and he is thusly satiated with his own wit, only to find that in a parallel universe held within his mind he was second and therefore nothing. Bucket named Beckett behind him spills and a vortex spirals in the sand...all is lost!...all is lost!
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 12:33 AM on April 12, 2006

Witty isn't.
posted by DeepFriedTwinkies at 12:56 AM on April 12, 2006

Determined to have the last word, drinks another cup of coffee.
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 1:11 AM on April 12, 2006

Eventually falls asleep and has nightmare that one lone other also makes pact with self to get the last word. Post never ends. The two are never seen again...
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 1:13 AM on April 12, 2006

Suggests opening membership
posted by johnny7 at 1:32 AM on April 12, 2006

Points out to Sir BoBoEtc that not all mefites are American.
posted by UbuRoivas at 1:37 AM on April 12, 2006

Can simply not keep self from pissing on the same corner as everyone else.
posted by quite unimportant at 1:43 AM on April 12, 2006

Observation, in Swedish, that I am not receiving the torrented file as quickly as I'd like, capped with a seeeeeeeeeda!!!
posted by milquetoast at 1:45 AM on April 12, 2006

Gosh - this post was worth it just for all teh crazi comments...
posted by Chunder at 1:48 AM on April 12, 2006

posted by loquacious at 1:50 AM on April 12, 2006

Meta-MetaFilter
posted by UbuRoivas at 1:56 AM on April 12, 2006

All are Amerikan. All will assimilate. The only timezone is my timezone. You will all sleep now.
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 2:32 AM on April 12, 2006

Attempt to start ironic exchange using phrase O RLY?
posted by Sonny Jim at 2:52 AM on April 12, 2006

Complaint that everybody else is quicker and smarter than me. Realization that I'll never catch up on all of the in-jokes.
posted by Dunwitty at 3:02 AM on April 12, 2006

comment of assurance that you shouldn't worry. NO ONE knows all the in-jokes. We're all at least partially out of the loop. Just take this post for the epic self-referential clusterfuck that it is.
posted by Parannoyed at 3:14 AM on April 12, 2006

I might
posted by If I Had An Anus at 5:43 AM on April 12, 2006

as well
posted by If I Had An Anus at 5:43 AM on April 12, 2006

take 600.
posted by If I Had An Anus at 5:43 AM on April 12, 2006

Thank you, sir, come again.
posted by If I Had An Anus at 5:44 AM on April 12, 2006

potzrebie
posted by Fezboy! at 5:49 AM on April 12, 2006

Thank you sir. May I have another?
posted by OmieWise at 5:50 AM on April 12, 2006

Annoying O RLY rejoinder. Choose:

a) YA RLY
b) NO WAI
c) K THX BYE
d) NT RLY
posted by GuyZero at 6:05 AM on April 12, 2006

Bleary expression of amazement that you're all still here.
posted by jonmc at 6:45 AM on April 12, 2006

Of course i am "still" here. just got back from sigur ros gig.

{obligatory jonmc "yr music sux" post}
posted by UbuRoivas at 7:07 AM on April 12, 2006

snarky remark about monkeys, hamlet and the internet
posted by pyramid termite at 7:17 AM on April 12, 2006

posted by If I Had An Anus at 7:18 AM on April 12, 2006

Post patiently pointing out that Fezboy! has misspelled potrzebie, at the same time registering some admiration for Fezboy!'s resurrection of such an utterly obscure cultural meme, while at the same time acknowledging the inevitability of there being a Wikipedia entry for it.

Is it true that, this high in the posting numbers, the air starts to get thin?
posted by digaman at 7:42 AM on April 12, 2006

Comment regarding the inevitability of posting in this thread.
posted by Inkoate at 7:49 AM on April 12, 2006

Ditto! (just kidding)
posted by hal9k at 7:49 AM on April 12, 2006

Veiled comment about Feyd-Rautha, aka Sting, aka Gordon Matthew Thomas Sumner:

"I will kill him!"
posted by Mr Bluesky at 8:43 AM on April 12, 2006

unmeaningful contribution towards the Almighty Post Count
posted by pyramid termite at 9:23 AM on April 12, 2006

Attempt to jump on bandwagon while nonchalantly pretending to have been here all along.
posted by Dormant Gorilla at 9:26 AM on April 12, 2006

Wow, you can see everything from here. And look! There's my house!
posted by malaprohibita at 9:46 AM on April 12, 2006

My God!....It's full of stars!
posted by halcyon_daze at 10:06 AM on April 12, 2006

Straw men? Nah, whittlin' men...
posted by paulsc at 10:19 AM on April 12, 2006

My God!....It's full of stars!

posted by CynicalKnight at 10:27 AM on April 12, 2006

Having trouble breathing. Air getting thin. As are my comments.
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 11:22 AM on April 12, 2006

*farts mightily*
posted by pyramid termite at 11:28 AM on April 12, 2006

Disdainful correction of previous posters "most comments ever" claim. Reference to other record breaking threads. Pointed lack of link in order to keep others out of the loop.
posted by raedyn at 11:32 AM on April 12, 2006

Declaration on the existence of a cabal.
posted by raedyn at 11:33 AM on April 12, 2006

Refutation of the existance of said cabal while simultaneously flogging expired equine.
posted by keswick at 11:53 AM on April 12, 2006

I have nothing to say and I am saying it.
posted by mazola at 12:20 PM on April 12, 2006

Suggestion that, when one has nothing to say, one's lips are sealed. Further query as to why, when something has been said once, one would say it again.
posted by cortex at 12:24 PM on April 12, 2006

exasperated comment about how this thread. won't. die.
posted by Parannoyed at 12:31 PM on April 12, 2006

Suggestion that, when one's lips are sealed, typing onto the keyboard makes posting much easier. In conlcusion, when one has nothing to say, make another comment about it.
posted by Sprocket at 12:39 PM on April 12, 2006

Maintains a healthy, respectful discussion by focusing comment on the issues, topics, and facts at hand -- not at other members of the site.
posted by mazola at 12:43 PM on April 12, 2006

how about this thread comment won't. die. exasperated. ?
posted by Sprocket at 12:49 PM on April 12, 2006

The end.
posted by mazola at 1:12 PM on April 12, 2006

Attempt to kill thread with previously celebrated thread-killing abilities.
posted by raedyn at 1:17 PM on April 12, 2006

Watches thread refuse to die. Simultaneously helps it fight to it's death.
posted by Sprocket at 1:57 PM on April 12, 2006

Notes that pics can be posted in button form.
posted by ninjew at 2:07 PM on April 12, 2006

>This threads given MeFi the old "Rope-a-Dope"..I say it comes back on the 900th post for a KO<
posted by Mr Bluesky at 2:22 PM on April 12, 2006

*Migs sighting*
posted by LarryC at 2:25 PM on April 12, 2006

Considers posting again in thread, thinks better of it.
posted by brain_drain at 2:26 PM on April 12, 2006

Sorry, haven't commented around here for a while. Did I miss something?
posted by feelinglistless at 2:51 PM on April 12, 2006

feelingnostalgicforearly2000s
posted by ColdChef at 3:06 PM on April 12, 2006

No comment.
posted by zoinks at 3:25 PM on April 12, 2006

Comment congratulating CynicalKnight for an image incorporating at least 4 cultural references. Tries to remember what thread this is.
posted by Laotic at 3:32 PM on April 12, 2006

Feels compelled to remark that there are still idiots posting to this stupid thread. Realizes too late that he is now just as idiotic. Tries to mitigate by remarking on his clear-eyed recognition that he is in fact an idiot but it doesn't help.
posted by octothorpe at 4:12 PM on April 12, 2006

Suggestion to keep it going FOREVER.
posted by spiderskull at 4:16 PM on April 12, 2006

Additional separate comment pointing out how weird it is that periods. add. weird. comic. book. guy. emphasis. (EVER.)
posted by spiderskull at 4:18 PM on April 12, 2006

Rereads every single comment to check accuracy and continuity of presented information in discussions. Begins life-long study of thread, creating charts and graphs, and scientific facts by connecting topics, word counts, post location, time of day and user info to prove some powerful deep seeded, holy grail of secrets, never unveiled before this point that changes life as we know it. Also replicates original first read chuckles, laughter and sorrow where appropriate. Gets hungry and consumes handfuls of goldfish crackers. Leaves laboratory and races home in time for Simpsons.
posted by Sprocket at 5:03 PM on April 12, 2006

my comment is postede on yay!
posted by reality at 6:31 PM on April 12, 2006

www.beaten-to-death.old
posted by mazola at 8:12 PM on April 12, 2006

notes that participants are slacking off
posted by pyramid termite at 9:04 PM on April 12, 2006

Calculates time between every comment to assure himself that he has indeed broken the previous record of 2 hours 29 minutes of silence in this thread.

New thread silence record: 2 hours 32 minutes!
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 11:37 PM on April 12, 2006

Correction:
New thread silence record: 2 hours 33 minutes!
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 11:39 PM on April 12, 2006

*flings Pooflinger*
posted by loquacious at 12:08 AM on April 13, 2006

Six and change, motherfucker.
posted by cortex at 6:27 AM on April 13, 2006

Yo mama.
posted by ZenMasterThis at 6:32 AM on April 13, 2006

ka-pow
posted by Sprocket at 9:13 AM on April 13, 2006

tired. so very tired.
posted by Danf at 9:55 AM on April 13, 2006

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
posted by pyramid termite at 11:02 AM on April 13, 2006

Realizes that this was a beautiful thing, but it lost it's way on that great desert of meta-life and forgot what really matters on that meta-journey. Someday meta-data archelologists will put it in a museum next to the Rosetta Stone and the Dead Sea Scrolls, but for now it is a MONSTER and I put forth that it be euthanized at the soonest possible opportunity. It. needs, to die. Snif. Goodbye, you crazy meta-diamond. it was fun while it lasted...
posted by Skygazer at 11:16 AM on April 13, 2006

*keeps on dancing even though the lights are back on, the bar is long closed and speakers have been off for hours*
posted by loquacious at 11:43 AM on April 13, 2006

*Dances on the table with loquacious and hopes somebody will still join the party
posted by keijo at 12:33 PM on April 13, 2006

Complaint that keijo was not at last London meetup.
posted by grouse at 12:57 PM on April 13, 2006

*Attacks with chain saw the table upon which loquacious and keijo dance.*
posted by ZenMasterThis at 1:04 PM on April 13, 2006

The miniscule David slings his trusty stones repeatedly, but to no avail. The monster Goliath will not go down. "Curses to you," exclaims the frustrated little one as he scampers off to his lonely hovel.
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 1:06 PM on April 13, 2006

"Oh, David, why must you flame me so," exclaims the gentle, though disquietingly disfigured Goliath, before belching forth a cloud of blue-green gas.
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 1:08 PM on April 13, 2006

Minor player flings out biblical reference in attempt to aid misunderstood "monster", but is really trying to overcome feelings of being a misunderstood "monster", while not revealing his true desire of pushing the thread to the 1000 comment mark.
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 1:16 PM on April 13, 2006

"Flame," shouts little David, "now that's an idea. I'll set him afire! No beast can survive flames licking at their being for an extended period of time. That is sure to work!" David saddles his pony and sets out in search of a good flame.
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 1:21 PM on April 13, 2006

It's spring.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 4:33 PM on April 13, 2006

Look at the lambs frolic!
posted by Mr Bluesky at 4:49 PM on April 13, 2006

667 bitches
posted by cortex at 5:07 PM on April 13, 2006

sittin' in a tree
posted by brain_drain at 5:15 PM on April 13, 2006

see oh em em ee en tee
posted by cortex at 5:23 PM on April 13, 2006

I don't think so...
posted by ZenMasterThis at 7:31 PM on April 13, 2006

Twelve and change, motherfucker.
posted by cortex at 7:44 AM on April 14, 2006

Remove to fresh air. Give artificial respiration or oxygen.
posted by Sprocket at 8:15 AM on April 14, 2006

Hah.
posted by ZenMasterThis at 10:01 AM on April 14, 2006

The Terri Schiavo of threads ovah heah...

/bad bad taste.
posted by Skygazer at 12:34 PM on April 14, 2006

Discovers jinxed comment from days ago, is disproportionately amused by own wit, reposts to show wit to all and sundry.

Also, micturating elephants.
posted by kalimac at 12:40 PM on April 14, 2006

Notes that thread now resembles die hard Cure fans with initial frenzy of group circa 1986 similar to threads start. But now with decades of passing, still has core group of fans that insist on black teased hair, flowing shirts, and eye liner circa 2006.

(As seen by me two nights ago at the Elbow concert in the Doug Fir lounge in PDX..I swear)

Promises to devote same fanaticism to thread until passes 1000 mark.
posted by Mr Bluesky at 2:19 PM on April 14, 2006

Determined to be the last poster before this thread is archived.
posted by ZenMasterThis at 2:34 PM on April 14, 2006

If you've had a dose of a
freaky ghost baby
Ya better call
GHOSTBUSTERS

Lemme tell ya something
Bustin' makes me feel good!

I ain't afraid of no ghosts

Don't get caught alone no no
posted by Sprocket at 2:46 PM on April 14, 2006

Challenges ZenMasterThis for armwrestling over being the last poster.

(If anyone has insider-trading info on exactly when this will be archived, don't let ZMT know. Shhhhh!)
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 6:25 PM on April 14, 2006

Wasn't it Neil Young that sung, "it's better to burn out than fade away." Methinks this post is so fading away.
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 6:27 PM on April 14, 2006

Never!!!
posted by Mr Bluesky at 7:30 PM on April 14, 2006

A comment here a day keeps it's death at bay.
posted by Sprocket at 9:58 AM on April 15, 2006

I miss the salad days of the Mushroom Thread.

See what I did there?
posted by Gator at 10:24 AM on April 15, 2006

I miss the mushroom days of the salad thread.
posted by ZenMasterThis at 1:17 PM on April 15, 2006

Cortex, you've been beat by Sprocket by over 2 hours and change...
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 1:20 PM on April 15, 2006

Can this thread be resurrected from the cave so that bunnies with eggs and chocolate can bounce in its honor? I want my yellow sugar covered marshmellow chick to be covered in blue this year.
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 1:23 PM on April 15, 2006

. ?
posted by Mr Bluesky at 1:56 PM on April 15, 2006

"I don't understand, sir, we've shot it through the heart, chopped off its arms and legs, run over it with a truck...but it still keeps moving as if it's alive. What do we have to do to kill this thing?"

"Well," said Sheriff P. Flinger, "might be you're gonna have to take off its head, see what keeps it tickin'. Seems to feed on brains, maybe that's what needs to go. If'n that don't work, we might just have to chain it down and see if we can starve it to death."

"But, how we..."

"You see that chainsaw over there? Better get it oiled up, this might get messy."
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 2:03 PM on April 15, 2006

Still going ... nothing outlasts the ZenMaster.
posted by ZenMasterThis at 2:37 PM on April 15, 2006

Reference to following Python scene:

[King Arthur music]
[music stops]
BLACK KNIGHT:
Aaaagh!
[King Arthur music]
[music stops]
BLACK KNIGHT:
Aaagh!
GREEN KNIGHT:
Ooh!
[King Arthur music]
[music stops]
[stab]
BLACK KNIGHT:
Aagh!
GREEN KNIGHT:
Oh!
[King Arthur music]
Ooh! Uuh.
[music stops]
BLACK KNIGHT:
Aaaagh!
[clang]
BLACK KNIGHT and GREEN KNIGHT:
Agh!, oh!, etc.
GREEN KNIGHT:
Aaaaaah! Aaaaaaaaah!
[woosh]
[BLACK KNIGHT kills GREEN KNIGHT]
[thud]
[scrape]
BLACK KNIGHT:
Umm!
[clop clop clop]
ARTHUR:
You fight with the strength of many men, Sir Knight.
[pause]
I am Arthur, King of the Britons.
[pause]
I seek the finest and the bravest knights in the land to join me in my court at Camelot.
[pause]
You have proved yourself worthy. Will you join me?
[pause]
You make me sad. So be it. Come, Patsy.
BLACK KNIGHT:
None shall pass.
ARTHUR:
What?
BLACK KNIGHT:
None shall pass.
ARTHUR:
I have no quarrel with you, good Sir Knight, but I must cross this bridge.
BLACK KNIGHT:
Then you shall die.
ARTHUR:
I command you, as King of the Britons, to stand aside!
BLACK KNIGHT:
I move for no man.
ARTHUR:
So be it!
ARTHUR and BLACK KNIGHT:
Aaah!, hiyaah!, etc.
[ARTHUR chops the BLACK KNIGHT's left arm off]
ARTHUR:
Now stand aside, worthy adversary.
BLACK KNIGHT:
'Tis but a scratch.
ARTHUR:
A scratch? Your arm's off!
BLACK KNIGHT:
No, it isn't.
ARTHUR:
Well, what's that, then?
BLACK KNIGHT:
I've had worse.
ARTHUR:
You liar!
BLACK KNIGHT:
Come on, you pansy!
[clang]
Huyah!
[clang]
Hiyaah!
[clang]
Aaaaaaaah!
[ARTHUR chops the BLACK KNIGHT's right arm off]
ARTHUR:
Victory is mine!
[kneeling]
We thank Thee Lord, that in Thy mer--
BLACK KNIGHT:
Hah!
[kick]
Come on, then.
ARTHUR:
What?
BLACK KNIGHT:
Have at you!
[kick]
ARTHUR:
Eh. You are indeed brave, Sir Knight, but the fight is mine.
BLACK KNIGHT:
Oh, had enough, eh?
ARTHUR:
Look, you stupid bastard. You've got no arms left.
BLACK KNIGHT:
Yes, I have.
ARTHUR:
Look!
BLACK KNIGHT:
Just a flesh wound.
[kick]
ARTHUR:
Look, stop that.
BLACK KNIGHT:
Chicken!
[kick]
Chickennn!
ARTHUR:
Look, I'll have your leg.
[kick]
Right!
[whop]
[ARTHUR chops the BLACK KNIGHT's right leg off]
BLACK KNIGHT:
Right. I'll do you for that!
ARTHUR:
You'll what?
BLACK KNIGHT:
Come here!
ARTHUR:
What are you going to do, bleed on me?
BLACK KNIGHT:
I'm invincible!
ARTHUR:
You're a looney.
BLACK KNIGHT:
The Black Knight always triumphs! Have at you! Come on, then.
[whop]
[ARTHUR chops the BLACK KNIGHT's last leg off]
BLACK KNIGHT:
Oh? All right, we'll call it a draw.
ARTHUR:
Come, Patsy.
BLACK KNIGHT:
Oh. Oh, I see. Running away, eh? You yellow bastards! Come back here and take what's coming to you. I'll bite your legs off!
posted by Mr Bluesky at 5:39 PM on April 15, 2006

Feh.

Meh.

Heh.

Teh.
posted by ZenMasterThis at 6:22 PM on April 15, 2006

but can you run linux on it?
posted by treepour at 6:27 PM on April 15, 2006

She's
posted by Mr Bluesky at 8:33 PM on April 15, 2006

losing
posted by Mr Bluesky at 8:33 PM on April 15, 2006

blood
posted by Mr Bluesky at 8:34 PM on April 15, 2006

badly!
posted by Mr Bluesky at 8:34 PM on April 15, 2006

Clamp!
posted by Mr Bluesky at 8:35 PM on April 15, 2006

Suture!
posted by Mr Bluesky at 8:35 PM on April 15, 2006

Yes, we got a pulse...nurse?
posted by Mr Bluesky at 8:36 PM on April 15, 2006

700 over 15 doctor..nice work Doc, real touch and go there for a moment!

>flutters lids and swoons at his mastery<

Reflects on how she wishes he wasn't a raging alcoholic.
posted by Mr Bluesky at 8:39 PM on April 15, 2006

Asphincter says what?
posted by Sprocket at 12:33 AM on April 16, 2006

And when the last lemming leaned over the edge...
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 2:15 AM on April 16, 2006

* mutters something about how new signups should have been closed ten thousand users ago *
posted by blue_beetle at 10:12 AM on April 16, 2006

Smug Mac owner snark.
posted by ZenMasterThis at 1:10 PM on April 16, 2006

*mutters something about how new signups should have, perhaps, been closed ten thousand and one users ago*
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 1:13 PM on April 16, 2006

*upon further reflection, mutters something about how those that are afraid of evolution and where ever that leads get stuck spinning in closed circles of nostalgia...like children getting stoned on dizzyness*
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 1:23 PM on April 16, 2006

Nothing to see here.
Move along.
Just kids trying to have fun.
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 1:30 PM on April 16, 2006

I am become Shiva, destroyer of threads.
posted by ZenMasterThis at 4:51 PM on April 16, 2006

Notes that original link already passed 800 while here MeFiers are thankfully more jaded and ADHD affected than counterparts and have given up the ghost.

Realizes just perpetuated very counterpoint and disappears into own quantum anomaly.

42.
posted by Mr Bluesky at 7:05 PM on April 16, 2006

23.
posted by ZenMasterThis at 4:46 AM on April 17, 2006

We can't stop here. This is bat country!
posted by Drexen at 6:32 AM on April 17, 2006

(Nevermind about the bats; the poor bastard would see tnem soon enough.)
posted by ZenMasterThis at 7:01 AM on April 17, 2006

*THEM*
posted by ZenMasterThis at 7:01 AM on April 17, 2006

Nevermind about tnem its su with have to worry about!
posted by Mr Bluesky at 7:03 AM on April 17, 2006

licks own ear and eats own head
posted by Sprocket at 8:43 AM on April 17, 2006

posted by ZenMasterThis at 10:02 AM on April 17, 2006

posted by If I Had An Anus at 10:08 AM on April 17, 2006

Who shot who in the what where when?
posted by Sprocket at 2:53 PM on April 17, 2006

I want you all to know that if we're still doing this on Sunday evening, my Lufthansa flight has WiFi, and I'll be checking this thread while flying over the Atlantic.

I will win this.
posted by ZenMasterThis at 5:21 PM on April 17, 2006

makeweight remark
posted by brain_drain at 5:36 PM on April 17, 2006

"CUNTING MARKDOWN!!" - teh crab
posted by roboto at 6:35 PM on April 17, 2006

Is there some way I can remove this from 'my comments'?

Or to put it another way: dear god let it end.
posted by MetaMonkey at 7:17 PM on April 17, 2006

No, no. This is pretty cool. I'm not sure why, but it's cool.
posted by exlotuseater at 8:26 PM on April 17, 2006

Its the thread that never ends... it just goes on and on my friend..
posted by Mr Bluesky at 8:48 PM on April 17, 2006

And on the eighth day...
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 1:36 AM on April 18, 2006

...the alarm clock rang out and a giant blue hand turned the buzzing drone of metal chatter off.
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 1:41 AM on April 18, 2006

But the pooflinging monkey found he was fond of clanky chatter. Music to his hairy ears, he picked up a spoon and pan and began to clang, clang, clang.
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 1:43 AM on April 18, 2006

Honey, I think I'm finally getting a suntan. Can we stay another weekend?
posted by Drexen at 2:30 AM on April 18, 2006

You can lead a horse to water, but.... A bird in the elevator, and pretend i'm firing the lasers on my space robot ran windows it would crash with a propensity for kinky fun times!
posted by roboto at 4:49 AM on April 18, 2006

- outlander
posted by roboto at 4:50 AM on April 18, 2006

Comment seven days late wondering if anyone is still reading this thread.
posted by moonbiter at 8:06 AM on April 18, 2006

Comment seven years late wondering if anyone will send help; also if it will be possible to stave off for any longer the temptation to fire the flare gun.
posted by Drexen at 9:04 AM on April 18, 2006

This is the line for the bathroom, right?
posted by Sprocket at 10:10 AM on April 18, 2006

No, it's the line for your mom.
posted by keswick at 11:03 AM on April 18, 2006

Your mom!
posted by OmieWise at 11:34 AM on April 18, 2006

You guys should try my mom...she can handle five at a time.
posted by If I Had An Anus at 11:37 AM on April 18, 2006

Is the noise in my head bothering anybody?
posted by ZenMasterThis at 2:14 PM on April 18, 2006

So, is this sack race over yet or what?
posted by If I Had An Anus at 6:58 PM on April 18, 2006

,
posted by ZenMasterThis at 7:40 PM on April 18, 2006

Good night John boy!
posted by Mr Bluesky at 9:13 PM on April 18, 2006

Is the nose on my face bothering anybody?
posted by ZenMasterThis at 5:17 AM on April 19, 2006

Me. But that's just me.
posted by OmieWise at 5:40 AM on April 19, 2006

I take it back, your nose knows it's nice.
posted by OmieWise at 6:19 AM on April 19, 2006

Come on 750!
posted by Mr Bluesky at 6:23 AM on April 19, 2006

750?
posted by OmieWise at 6:27 AM on April 19, 2006

Yee Haw!
posted by OmieWise at 6:28 AM on April 19, 2006

Racing toward it.
posted by OmieWise at 6:28 AM on April 19, 2006

It's something to dream about.
posted by OmieWise at 6:29 AM on April 19, 2006

It's a political necessity.
posted by OmieWise at 6:29 AM on April 19, 2006

750!
posted by OmieWise at 6:30 AM on April 19, 2006

Oops, this goes with political necessity.
posted by OmieWise at 6:31 AM on April 19, 2006

I don't know what the fuck you just said little kid, but it touched me, in the heart.
posted by Sprocket at 10:18 AM on April 19, 2006

Oh yeah, well your nose smells.
posted by ZenMasterThis at 7:47 PM on April 19, 2006

Monkey Tantrum!! Oop oop!
posted by roboto at 9:52 PM on April 19, 2006

Come on 755!

Hmm that was anticlimactic.
posted by Mr Bluesky at 7:15 AM on April 20, 2006

10 8 9 7 5 6 4 2 3 1 -1 0
posted by Sprocket at 10:53 AM on April 20, 2006

757 Glider kit (pdf) from Nasa.
posted by OmieWise at 11:05 AM on April 20, 2006

Amalgamated Transit Union Local 758
posted by cortex at 12:19 PM on April 20, 2006

Words fail me.
posted by ZenMasterThis at 5:39 PM on April 20, 2006

Chimes in after a few days absence to comment that he regrets he really has nothing to say.
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 12:51 AM on April 21, 2006

Rechimes to apologize for previous post in which he had a lack of words.
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 12:54 AM on April 21, 2006

Apologizes for previouses ad infinitum.
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 12:55 AM on April 21, 2006

May I just say here that this is my next post?
posted by ZenMasterThis at 5:44 AM on April 21, 2006

Man, that is such a ripoff. ZMT stole my next post. 764-Hero!
posted by OmieWise at 6:34 AM on April 21, 2006

Help!
posted by If I Had An Anus at 6:41 AM on April 21, 2006

What does all this mean, anyway?
posted by Drexen at 6:58 AM on April 21, 2006

Sudden compulsion to re-post link under guise of Flash Friday...broohoohaaaw!!
posted by Mr Bluesky at 9:01 AM on April 21, 2006

Honorary mushroom.
posted by If I Had An Anus at 10:43 AM on April 21, 2006

“these things have got to happen every ten years or so;” says Clemenza, “it cleans out the bad blood.”
posted by OmieWise at 11:50 AM on April 21, 2006

This reminds me of something
posted by Cranberry at 1:07 PM on April 21, 2006

*dials 764-HERO, gets busy signal*
posted by Cranberry at 1:08 PM on April 21, 2006

*dials 867-5309, gets Jenny, makes her mine*
posted by keswick at 2:16 PM on April 21, 2006

773 will be back soon.
posted by Sprocket at 3:34 PM on April 21, 2006

Comments with hyperlink referencing the number 774.
posted by Sprocket at 3:42 PM on April 21, 2006

775 stones which disjoin themselves from their mortar.
posted by Sprocket at 3:44 PM on April 21, 2006

777 they will call you
Toward heaven, heaven, heaven you will soar
Only God can make a tree I will grant you
But only Man can make a 40th floor

--Felix Ungar
posted by ZenMasterThis at 7:28 PM on April 21, 2006

THEN GOD IS 7
THEN GOD IS 7
THEN GOD IS 7
posted by cortex at 8:55 PM on April 21, 2006

This monkey is going to bed.
posted by ereshkigal45 at 10:09 PM on April 21, 2006

Why can't some hyperactive, meta-methaddict just go wacko and post like 200 comments in a row so we can get our four-digit post and be done with it. And maybe they can have Tourette's Syndrome too so to make it an interesting explitive moment for us to read in the process.
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 1:41 AM on April 22, 2006

I hope
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 1:42 AM on April 22, 2006

or even better, you God damn well better hope
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 1:43 AM on April 22, 2006

you're not talkin to me, fuckwit
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 1:44 AM on April 22, 2006

shit in your hair, mouth, ass
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 1:44 AM on April 22, 2006

fuckwit where's my crack pipe
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 1:45 AM on April 22, 2006

can I hump your leg?
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 1:46 AM on April 22, 2006

note: Help maintain a healthy, respectful discussion by focusing comments on the
issues, topics, and facts at hand -- not at other members of the site.
posted by ZenMasterThis at 6:39 AM on April 22, 2006

Split personality says what?
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 9:16 AM on April 22, 2006

Informs others on list to pay no attention to his "brother" since he wears women's clothes.
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 9:24 AM on April 22, 2006

*hopes Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III can pull himself together*
posted by Cranberry at 2:48 PM on April 22, 2006

Muiritu wa Kabete!!
posted by roboto at 9:55 PM on April 22, 2006

The depth of my disgust is only exceeded by the oozing of my ennui.
posted by OmieWise at 7:31 AM on April 24, 2006

You got your ennui in my schadenfreude!
posted by cortex at 7:49 AM on April 24, 2006

Prediction confirmed.
posted by found missing at 8:24 AM on April 24, 2006

Nonsense, hater.
posted by OmieWise at 8:27 AM on April 24, 2006

It is Monday and this is my comment.
posted by Sprocket at 8:28 AM on April 24, 2006

We'll never make 800.
posted by Sprocket at 8:28 AM on April 24, 2006

We can, we will. We Must!
posted by OmieWise at 11:40 AM on April 24, 2006

If it's just me, I think I'll need a sacrowedgy to see me through.
posted by OmieWise at 12:35 PM on April 24, 2006

Eight Hundred Children Wherefore art thou?
posted by OmieWise at 12:44 PM on April 24, 2006

800 Balloons released in Ipswich.
posted by OmieWise at 12:45 PM on April 24, 2006

im in ur case killing ur 800ds
posted by cortex at 12:45 PM on April 24, 2006

800 al-qaeda men ready to strike.
posted by OmieWise at 12:47 PM on April 24, 2006

*dials 1-800-al-qaeda, line is busy*
posted by Cranberry at 11:43 PM on April 24, 2006

where shall we go from here?
posted by Sprocket at 2:55 PM on April 25, 2006

Camelot?
posted by cortex at 3:07 PM on April 25, 2006

Operator - we need an exit.
posted by Drexen at 12:26 AM on April 26, 2006

Exit.
posted by OmieWise at 5:16 AM on April 26, 2006

nothin' sounds quite like an
eight oh eight
posted by cortex at 6:24 AM on April 26, 2006

hitlerstalin your own damn self.
posted by OmieWise at 7:16 AM on April 26, 2006

What does that mean, Omie?
posted by Cranberry at 10:52 AM on April 26, 2006

It means keep your eyes on the road and your hands upon the wheel.
posted by cortex at 11:01 AM on April 26, 2006

Oh, it was just cross-thread snarking at cortex (or his damn dutch intern), for trying to fuck with the flow up above.
posted by OmieWise at 11:13 AM on April 26, 2006

posted by If I Had An Anus at 12:19 PM on April 26, 2006

814: FUCK YOU RED BARON
posted by Sprocket at 12:32 PM on April 26, 2006

Y'know, just to get the comment count up, I give you PC-815 (otherwise know as Hubbard's 815).
posted by OmieWise at 1:11 PM on April 26, 2006

You would.
posted by If I Had An Anus at 1:14 PM on April 26, 2006

Ya know, I read beth's occupation as her gender. Works either way.
posted by If I Had An Anus at 1:16 PM on April 26, 2006

Weird. I'd never clicked through.
posted by OmieWise at 1:24 PM on April 26, 2006

On the 819th day of the marginally offensive pun, my true blue gave to me...

819 endlessly clucking web-footed duck-billed platypus'!
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 3:35 PM on April 26, 2006

Or would that be platypi? And let's go ahead and make it 820 of them little mother cluckers.
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 3:37 PM on April 26, 2006

821: The smallest prime whose reversal is a seventh power.
posted by Sprocket at 9:34 AM on April 27, 2006

"Come back."

The 75-822, of course.
posted by OmieWise at 10:45 AM on April 27, 2006

Go !
posted by roboto at 1:58 PM on April 27, 2006

Excitation [824]
posted by Sprocket at 2:47 PM on April 28, 2006

180
posted by cortex at 2:52 PM on April 28, 2006

826 Valencia. Too easy.
posted by OmieWise at 6:02 PM on April 28, 2006

7 x 8 x 13 reversed?
posted by Cranberry at 11:58 PM on April 28, 2006

Slowing down, Capt. The gravitational pull of the black hole is too strong. We will slow to a stall, then get sucked into the archive if we don't push the engines to the max!
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 12:24 AM on April 29, 2006

Obsessively computes that at a pace of 12.388 comments per day, we may just squeek past 1000 comments in thread before being closed and archived.
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 12:28 AM on April 29, 2006

What, is this thread taking the day off in protest, too?
posted by keswick at 4:17 PM on May 1, 2006

Si.
posted by Cranberry at 4:38 PM on May 1, 2006

*cue Jack Benny / Mel Blanc routine *
posted by keswick at 9:21 PM on May 1, 2006

keep on truckin'.
posted by Sprocket at 12:08 PM on May 2, 2006

Chimes in to present some witty quote, but then forgets what it was. Something Dr. Frankenstein said shortly after the lightning hit? Visions of a wide-eyed Gene Wilder sparkle in his head.
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 7:01 PM on May 2, 2006

THIS IS ANOTHER COMMENT!
posted by Sprocket at 9:11 AM on May 4, 2006

THE PREVIOUS STATEMENT IS FALSE!
posted by cortex at 9:34 AM on May 4, 2006

THIS STATEMENT IS FALSE!
posted by OmieWise at 10:07 AM on May 4, 2006

THIS WHOLE COURTROOM IS FALSE!
posted by cortex at 10:07 AM on May 4, 2006

There's a courtroom? That's terrifying.
posted by OmieWise at 10:25 AM on May 4, 2006

Terrifyin is terrifyin!
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 12:44 AM on May 5, 2006

THIS ISN'T ANOTHER COMMENT!
posted by Sprocket at 9:24 AM on May 5, 2006

We'll never even make it to 900!
posted by Sprocket at 9:27 AM on May 5, 2006

waits for panic to ensue
posted by Sprocket at 9:27 AM on May 5, 2006

impatiently still waits for the ensuing of the panic
posted by Sprocket at 9:29 AM on May 5, 2006

starts panicking alone
posted by Sprocket at 9:30 AM on May 5, 2006

Smells some small amount of panic residue somewhere over near the corner by the kitchen cabinet, but then realizes it could also easily just be that ham sandwich that fell behind the fridge last year.
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 4:05 AM on May 6, 2006

Panic ensues thinking that the smell of panic really does smell like one year old ham sandwiches.
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 4:06 AM on May 6, 2006

Heads toward the deli to warn others.
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 4:06 AM on May 6, 2006

At the deli:
Hey comment-person 387, are you eating ham or turkey?
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 4:24 AM on May 6, 2006

G-387:
That would be turkey, with swiss. Why?
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 4:25 AM on May 6, 2006

Blue 849:
I'm just trying to understand where that smell came from? Is it ham, or is it the ensuing panic?
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 4:25 AM on May 6, 2006

G-387:
Don't know what you're talking about.
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 4:26 AM on May 6, 2006

B-849:
You know, ...early death, that smell specific to death of the young. Sad, decaying ham kinda smell?
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 4:27 AM on May 6, 2006

G-387:
Again, really don't know where you're coming from.
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 4:27 AM on May 6, 2006

B-849:
Just consider yourself warned. Death is in the air and it smells lke one year old ham sandwiches trapped behind refrigerators.
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 4:28 AM on May 6, 2006

G-387:
Oh, I get it now, you must be from the blue. You've mistaken me for someone else. I'm from the green and we're still going strong. We're about to pass 1100 comments. And we're original. We are the originators of you. That is why you smell like one year old ham sandwiches. It is the smell of decaying redundancy.
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 4:28 AM on May 6, 2006

B-849:
(blinking in disbelief)
You guys are really up past 1000?
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 4:28 AM on May 6, 2006

G-1090:
Sorry, sir, you're going to have to leave. We don't serve your type in here.
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 4:29 AM on May 6, 2006

B-849/857:
Oh, you must be talking about B-849. He left a few minutes ago. He was loopy in the head. He couldn't even stay on topic. I'm B-857 and I use deoderant!...
posted by Sir BoBoMonkey Pooflinger Esquire III at 4:34 AM on May 6, 2006

860 sans hyperlink
posted by Sprocket at 10:03 AM on May 9, 2006

Excitable n00b stating "last post" even though there is a good chance it won't be.
posted by longbaugh at 10:25 AM on May 9, 2006

Funky do morro! Baile!
posted by roboto at 10:57 AM on May 9, 2006

This will also not be the last post.
posted by cortex at 3:55 PM on May 10, 2006

Why, why hast thou foresaken me?
posted by OmieWise at 5:23 AM on May 11, 2006

something something touch yourself at night
posted by cortex at 6:29 AM on May 11, 2006

Now, this comment on the other hand...
posted by cortex at 6:52 AM on May 11, 2006

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