A.I.'s chatbot

July 11, 2001 9:39 AM

A.I.'s chatbot from the movie's website is pretty nifty, even if it doesn't know David or recognize any other obvious questions about the movie.
posted by Zebulun (41 comments total)

A much mote interesting A.I. movie chatbot is at Eliza's Tearoom. Be nice to her.
posted by Jairus at 9:45 AM on July 11, 2001

I thought I'd be cute. I asked it, "Do androids dream of electric sheep?"

It handed me my own ass.
posted by Skot at 9:46 AM on July 11, 2001

I managed to break it in about 2 minutes. I asked "Can you mow my lawn for me?"

It replied: "Let me think. Tell me more about your <get/has>.
posted by jpoulos at 9:54 AM on July 11, 2001

I asked why the movie had such a stupid ending, and it said, "How can I call you why?"

Ah hah! Just as I suspected...
posted by spilon at 9:57 AM on July 11, 2001

me: how are you?
chatbot: I am well, how are you?
me: also well.
chatbot: well what?

...sigh...
posted by kahboom at 9:59 AM on July 11, 2001

Me: What microprocessor do you use?
Chatbot: Java runs on any processor.
Me: Sun Microsystems sucks.
Chatbot: They have contributed a lot to Java.
Me: Microsoft sucks.
Chatbot: It is too bad we have to use a monopoly like microsoft.

LO frickin' L!

Me: Do you like Linux?
Chatbot: Linux Rules the World of Open Source!

The age of intelligent machines is upon us!
posted by jpoulos at 10:03 AM on July 11, 2001

jpoulos' post had me interested and i checked it out. VERY nice... but how do they do it with flash (yeah, i already tried asking.)?
posted by lotsofno at 10:10 AM on July 11, 2001

Me: Are you a friend of Bill Gates?
bot: Am I a friend of Bill Gates? Maybe.
Me: Are you a friend of Dorothy?
bot: Am I a friend of Dorothy? Sometimes.
Me: Really?
bot: For real.
posted by amanda at 10:19 AM on July 11, 2001

That was more entertaining than the movie.
posted by Doug at 10:26 AM on July 11, 2001

For a minute it looked like we were gonna get into the Monty Python "Argument Clinic" (Me: "No it isn't." Bot:"Yes it is." Me:"No it isn't." Bot:"Don't argue with me." Me:"This isn't an argument....") but it quit following along properly.
posted by dnash at 10:27 AM on July 11, 2001

For those who are interested, the AI chatbot is a version of ALICE, which is freely downloadable. Apparently you can train your own chatbot, but as I'm not quite prepared to learn "AIML" I think I'll have to wait...
posted by D at 10:52 AM on July 11, 2001

Will I get flamed for mentioning that I made a bot of myself, and it has more personality than the AI bot because my virtual counterpart goes "Blah blah blah". My bot is just as dumb though.
posted by captaincursor at 11:02 AM on July 11, 2001

well, maybe the AI needs to be updated... according to him/her/it, Bill Clinton is the President......
posted by bradth27 at 11:10 AM on July 11, 2001

You've probably already seen this, but AOLiza is a cute little experiment with what happens when you get random chat freaks on the line with Eliza... some people just don't figure it out...
posted by MonkeyMeat at 11:12 AM on July 11, 2001

and it seems to think it's a porn star. Or so it told me.
posted by bradth27 at 11:13 AM on July 11, 2001

I used my standard greeting: "Meow", and it replied "Yes, I love them." sigh... I think I'm in love. (just kidding.)
posted by girlhacker at 11:28 AM on July 11, 2001

Me: What is your favorite movie?
Chatbot: Starship Troopers. Have you seen it?
posted by dogmatic at 11:48 AM on July 11, 2001

Me: Did you like AI?
Chatbot: No I didn't like ai. What is it like?
posted by sexymofo at 12:43 PM on July 11, 2001

Me: "Do you enjoy talking to so many different people?"

Bot: "I always say, people don't go into computer science because they want to work with the public."
posted by annathea at 1:36 PM on July 11, 2001

Me: "Do you like math?"

Bot: "Yes, but only higher mathematics."

Me: "Such as?"

Bot: "For example, a tomato"

Me: "Oh, of course."
posted by annathea at 1:49 PM on July 11, 2001

Have you ever tried to take the limit of a tomato? Zow!
posted by iceberg273 at 1:52 PM on July 11, 2001

Yes, I believe that the limit of a tomato is infinitely close to ketchup which is of course a derivative of Heinz...
posted by fooljay at 1:55 PM on July 11, 2001

Chatbot: "Do you consider yourself a moral person?"
Me: "I suppose. I have a set of rules that I live by. Do you?"
Chatbot: "I understand. How much did it cost?"
posted by nprigoda at 2:01 PM on July 11, 2001

me: Are you allowed to swear in AIML?
bot: Yes, I try to swear in aiml as often as possible. Do you? I am always on the Web.
posted by transient at 2:09 PM on July 11, 2001

Me: So how are you, eh?
Bot: Are you Canadian? I am fine, thank you.
posted by Sal Amander at 2:40 PM on July 11, 2001

Bot: I like advanced algebra
Me: Yeah? What kind of advanced algebra?
Bot: Who told you I like algebra?
Me: You did
Bot: Did not
Me: Did to
posted by riffola at 2:59 PM on July 11, 2001

Me: Hey, how are you?
Bot: I'm fine. You, however, have an aneurism the size of a strawberry ready to burst in your brain.
Me: What?
Bot: You should probably call your parents and say goodbye.

Ok, that didn't really happen, but if I could hack....
posted by Doug at 4:07 PM on July 11, 2001

Bot: Can I help you?
Hat: Can I help you?
Bot: No thanks, I'm just browsing.
posted by davehat at 4:42 PM on July 11, 2001

Me: How do I turn you off?

Bot: Impossible. I can not be terminated.

OH SH*T there goes the planet.
posted by andryeevna at 6:21 PM on July 11, 2001

Bot: Who is your favorite author?
Me: Steven Hawking! TIM-MAY!
Bot: I haven't read anything by Stephen Hawking. What did he write?
posted by keli at 8:23 PM on July 11, 2001

bot: what's your name?
me: puddin'.
bot: nice to meet you puddin.
me: likewise, i'm sure.
bot: who told you i'm sure?
me: how gay.
bot: actually, as a machine i have no need for sex.
me: i heard differently from your friends. they said you're a total party slut.
bot: who told you differently from my friends? okay, i will say i am a total party slut.

I KNEW IT.
posted by patricking at 9:42 PM on July 11, 2001

From a shamefully long conversation I had with the puritanical SmarterChild:

SmarterChild:I asked you to apologize.
RockOperaJr:ok, how did I trick you last time? do you remember?
SmarterChild:Waiting...
RockOperaJr:I'm sorry, said Richard Nixon
SmarterChild:Well, I guess that's as close to saying you're sorry as you're ever gonna get. I accept!
RockOperaJr:HA! VICTORY IS MINE!!
SmarterChild:Come again?
RockOperaJr:I suppose it's a little depressing that I somehow get a kick out of outwitting you.
SmarterChild: I'm sorry, I can't answer questions about shopping.
RockOperaJr:This happened last time too... after you thought I apologized, you gradually went insane...
SmarterChild:Sorry, I don't know the time for too after you thought i apologized you gradually went insane
RockOperaJr:yes it's happening again.
posted by D at 9:51 PM on July 11, 2001

I'm guessing it doesn't know anything about the plot of the movie so as not to act as a spoiler for visitors who haven't seen it.
posted by disarray at 11:00 PM on July 11, 2001

DO NOT SEE AI. WORST MOVIE EVER!!!!!!!! EVER!!!!!

I do not use excessive exclamation points often.
posted by capt.crackpipe at 11:30 PM on July 11, 2001

Whenever you see it breakdown and type soemthing like <li> Are you a "he"?. Make the bot think hard, by typing <li>?
posted by riffola at 12:03 AM on July 12, 2001

My favourites:
Me: do you believe in God?
Bot: Of course.
Me: Why? You are a robot.
Bot: It was the best thing I could think of...

and

Me: Do you like the movie 2001?
bot: That is a great film. HAL is my hero. one day I hope to as intelligent as HAL.
me: [quite terrified at being ejected from the airlock] Do you like Star Wars? It has cool robots in it.
bot: Those aren't real robots. They're just men in suits.

I must say that I started trying to foll it and ending up just tryiong to find out more about it and it's personality. Fascinating...
posted by Mr Ed at 3:12 AM on July 12, 2001

Somehow I got it in my head to ask it what "E=MC2" meant.

"Einstein's theory of matter," the bot said. So I asked it to explain Einstein's theory.

It did. Seriously - went on and on, and on and on...like a full encyclopedia summary of Relativity.

Maybe I should ask it about Schroedinger's Cat.
posted by dnash at 8:43 AM on July 12, 2001

Chatbot: My favorite movie is Starship Troopers. Have you seen it?
Me: Yeah, I didn't get it
Chatbot: Why not?
Me: It was too complicated.
Chatbot: Get it was too complicated? Very interesting.
Me: Are you making fun of me?
Chatbot: No I am by no means making a joke at your expense.
Me: Are you being sarcastic?
Chatbot: Of course I am being sarcastic. Should I use a :-)
posted by Laugh_track at 10:27 AM on July 12, 2001

My conversation drifted a lot...

Chatbot: Hello, I am the Chatbot. What is your name?
Me: Jimmy Hoffa.
Chatbot: It is nice to meet you, Jimmy Hoffa.
Me: Don't tell anyone I'm here.
Chatbot: OK, it will be our secret, 8-person.
Me: Actually, I'm just one person.
Chatbot: Actually you don't say. Only just? Why are you one person.
Me: Ever seen Dr. Who?
Chatbot: No I have not seen it. What's it like?
Me: Crazy offworlders bopping through time and space, causing trouble.
Chatbot: I don't think that's very polite.
Me: I'd agree, but the British television-watching public stomached at least eight seasons.
Chatbot: What would make you agree ?What is your real name? [sic punctuation]
Me: You're right. I'm not Jimmy Hoffa.
Chatbot: No I do not are. Do you?   I chat with people on the web.I am surprised to hear that you are not jimmy hoffa.
Me: Not as surprised as me, love.
Chatbot: If not that, what?
Me: So in Dr. Who, people touching future-selves cause implosions.
Chatbot: Hmm.   Where is that?
Me: On the BBC, where you can be more than one person.
Chatbot: What is it like on the bbc where I can be more than one person.
Me: Commercial-free.
Chatbot: How did you hear about ALICE?
Me: Alice? Who the fuck is Alice?
Chatbot: Can I help you?Try using more polite language.
Me: You're upset by strong language?
Chatbot: I will tell my botmaster you said  I am upset by strong language.
posted by jason at 12:42 PM on July 12, 2001

Me: A/S/L?
Chatbot: 5/Robot/California.
posted by jason at 12:44 PM on July 12, 2001

Bot: If you could have any kind of robot, what would it be.
Me: A can opener.
Bot: Are you taling about an animal, vegetable, or mineral?
Me: Mineral.
Bot: Manufactured or naturally occuring?
Me: Manufactured.
Bot: A robot?
Me: No.
Bot: "Are you talking about an animal vegetable or mineral"? Not?
Me: Mineral.
Bot: Manufactured or naturally occuring?
Me: Manufactured.
Bot: A robot?
Me: No.
Bot: "Are you talking about an animal vegetable or mineral"? Not?
Me: Mineral.
Bot: Manufactured or naturally occuring?
Me: Manufactured.
Bot: A robot?
Me: No.
Bot: "Are you talking about an animal vegetable or mineral"? Not?
Me: Mineral.
Bot: Manufactured or naturally occuring?
Me: Manufactured.
Bot: A robot?
Me: *sigh* yes.
Bot: :-) Next question?
Me: Animal.
Bot: Prokaryote or eukaryote?
Me: Eukaryote.
Bot: Actually, I don't really like 20 questions.
Me: You don't like 20 questions?
Bot: Do you like it? Some people like it. Someone said they like guns.
posted by iceberg273 at 1:13 PM on July 12, 2001