One of my sisters suffers from paranoid schizophrenia. And that sentence is true -- she does suffer from it. And so did each and every one of us siblings, and my parents, and anyone else whose life touched hers.

And for so many years we were in denial, we just saw her as an asshole, a rude and crude jerk, unbelievably intertwined with my parents, psychologically, financially, in just about every way, really. She also has epilepsy, and has suffered from seizures,... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by dancestoblue at 10:15 PM on September 11, 2008

For a skeptical look at some common beliefs about learning styles, check out this article from the "Ask the Cognitive Psychologist" column of the American Federation of Teachers magazine.
posted to Ask Metafilter by ferdydurke at 5:18 PM on August 15, 2008

Relationship Filter: My boyfriend needs "space". Now what?

Give him space. But do it in an intelligent way: explain to him that adults don't reason through their problems by fucking other people. It's completely normal to want to spend time away from your SO, especially to get some perspective on things, but that too often becomes an excuse to engage in bad or inconsiderated behavior while dodging accountability (read: "It's not... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Inspector.Gadget at 8:02 PM on August 31, 2008

So according to OED and Chambers, the "later use" definition that is now popular among the internet age (also known as the WRONG definition) has now been added to the dictionary. Great to see them bowing to the illiteracy of today's youth. Sigh.

Yeah, these damn kids today in the 16th Century.
posted to MetaTalk by cortex at 7:02 AM on August 28, 2008

We're in a post-prescriptivist reality here people! Set your irregardless meter to cromulent!
posted to MetaTalk by blue_beetle at 8:30 AM on August 28, 2008

Ok - the SSL/Cookies thing for dummies:

(full disclosure, former intern at Google, doing a PhD in computer security. None of this violates my NDA.)

First off, you need to know that when you are using a public wireless network (coffee shops, your university, etc), your Internet browsing can be eavesdropped upon by anyone else nearby. They can see which web pages you visit, which IMs you send, and which *ahem* adult image you are looking at.... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by genome4hire at 11:17 AM on August 28, 2008

I think hipsterdom is particularly interesting because I agree with the author that it's the dead end of Western civ. But he doesn't say anything compelling about the phenomenon at all.

Here's my explanation for hipster self-hatred. All previous countercultures since you could really begin to speak of a counterculture--I would say, since the Romantics--have been fundamentally grounded in an appeal to authenticity. The Romantics prided themselves on their ability to... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by nasreddin at 8:45 AM on August 1, 2008

There are two different answers to your question, depending on what you are asking:

Did the ancients believe in their gods as strongly as we believe in ours? Most certainly, if not more so. The idea of atheism as we understand it, for instance, was not conceived of in the ancient world. You believed in the gods. It was only a question of which gods, and what you did about it. Without question there were people who did little to worship the Roman divinities, in the... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Maastrictian at 12:40 PM on July 29, 2008

On the subject of those notes:

My fiance fights with her Father all the time. She can't understand why men that age are so grumpy all the time. "He's never fucking happy," she'll say, banging a clenched fist against her hip. She doesn't understand what the truth of the matter is.

The truth of the matter is that her father has done everything that the world has told him makes him a Good Man, a Proper Man, a Real Man; he's worked his... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Jofus at 4:00 AM on July 24, 2008

As someone who used to translate Coptic texts (I was working on a hagiography of Mark's entrance into Egypt), I would like defend these scholars on both sides who are working with a confusing text.

When written, Coptic DOES NOT have spaces between letters or any punctuation (except for lines written over some vowels...there is some dispute about the signification of these lines although I personally think they have to do with tonality) and it is very easy to have... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by whimsicalnymph at 11:07 AM on June 30, 2008

Wow ... that was really stupid - did someone pay her to write that? seriously?

That said, I was reminded of a pretty telling moment at a party I attended recently. It was an end-of-the-semester dance party, right? So there was music and a strobe light going, and we were all having a good time. The girls kept slipping off a few at a time to drink from a bottle of booze one of them had hidden in a back room.

At one point, a... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by EatTheWeak at 10:23 AM on June 19, 2008

Honestly, don't do it. Hide it. Are you interested in someday marrying this girl? Don't do it. I have several friends with conservative asian parents that have hid it for YEARS, if they can do it, so can you! You'll be the guy that corrupted her and they are already suspicious of you. I'm also guessing you aren't asia. Yet another strike against you. Unemployed? An actor? Living in sin? No, no, no. Let them save face, let them save her and the family's reputation (yes I know it's... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by whoaali at 6:19 PM on June 25, 2008

Yeah, just to be clear, suspension of disbelief basically means, okay, I will accept a crazy premise SO LONG AS everything that proceeds from the premise is believable GIVEN THE PREMISE.

In a movie, the audience will swallow one big fish. This is known as 'the buy'. You are allowed exactly one and it happens in the first act (the first 25-30 minutes). Everything else must proceed logically from that buy, and obey any and all rules which are established by the buy.... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by unSane at 9:08 PM on June 17, 2008

I agree that the definition of genius will determine how this argument plays out, and that it will probably not end well.

Here are a couple of (half-remembered) remarks about Feynman, who a lot of people consider a genius: "Dick's method? His method is to write down the problem, think very hard, then write down the answer" and "[some other scientist] was very intelligent, but only the way you'd be intelligent, if you were ten times as... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by AmbroseChapel at 11:02 PM on June 4, 2008

Now in my 40s, I am just as sharp as I was in my 20s. But I went through a foggy period and many people I know are mired in it. Here's my theory: the brain is a "muscle." If you don't give it long, daily workouts, it gets flabby.

When you're a kid, everything is new and your brain is constantly at work just trying to figure out the world. It doesn't feel like work. It's just what happens. Then there's school. I don't think much of the American school system. I... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by grumblebee at 6:13 AM on April 26, 2008

Yeah, well I return to apologize to semmi for blowing my cool at his/her comment; I have a quick temper on this issue in particular because of my line of work (thank gawd we aren't discussing country music, or things might get really intense).

After a lifetime in music, I no longer believe musical value can be discerned from sound alone; the question for me is what music does for people, and in that respect, I start from the a priori position that all musics are equal... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by fourcheesemac at 3:45 AM on April 22, 2008

Always Go to the Funeral
posted to Ask Metafilter by JohnYaYa at 8:42 PM on April 7, 2008

I was thinking about this thread today as I got a sandwich, and proceeded to talk to my sister to ask her opinion on what I see as a trend. It probably isn't though; it has always been like this. Why do we insist that our understanding of people must be on a single scale, and that any flaw automatically removes any admiration?

Thomas Jefferson owned slaves. He also wrote the Declaration of Independence. Mother Teresa converted the dying. She also was one of the... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Lord Chancellor at 1:19 PM on April 6, 2008

Torchbearers were encircled by several hundred officers, some in riot police vehicles and on motorcycles, others on skates or on foot.

A social justice-oriented roller derby team just got a call on the red phone.
posted to MetaFilter by cowbellemoo at 6:51 AM on April 7, 2008

I'm currently working on a video about the neighborhood of Over-the-Rhine in Cincinnati. In one of our interviews, a woman who coordinates homeless shelters with relief agencies, told this story (this is verbatim from our transcript) about the working homeless:

***

As I mentioned, 60% of homeless people work, and the vast majority of them work at something called day labor or temporary labor industry. And the way day labor works - the best way... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by billysumday at 8:42 AM on March 23, 2008

You know, I did exactly this experiment when I was 22, but by accident. I moved out to Los Angeles with not enough money to get by, crashed and burned in a few weeks, ran out of money almost instantly thanks to the high cost of living out there, and moved into a shelter. I was college educated from the University of Minnesota, straight, white, good looking, healthy, and willing to work. I mention being straight, because the shelter I ran into was run by the gay/lesbian community services center... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Astro Zombie at 5:50 PM on February 15, 2008

What do you mean 'get'? It's a cow!
posted to MetaFilter by Catfry at 3:01 AM on February 10, 2008

All of the "Well, I've got to be going..." replies here don't really address the problem you have at the time, which is being trapped by the conversation. There doesn't ever seem to be a good time to interject that without it sounding blunt. Bottom line, you've got to take control of the conversation. Whatever the other person is talking about, say tennis, then interject a "hey that reminds me of a tennis story!", which can be a little... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by zardoz at 5:07 PM on September 12, 2007

I'm sure all the above advice is great but I didn't read it because I just wanted to say:

If he is willing to sign his check over to you, take it. You've repeatedly asked if he's willing to step up the the family plate and he's declined. Batter up.
posted to Ask Metafilter by DarlingBri at 9:04 PM on February 4, 2008

It's well worth your time to read Confessions of an Economic Hitman by John Perkins.

Mr. Perkins talks about how he was recruited by the CIA, and then went to work in the 'private sector'. His mission was simple: to convince foreign governments to take loans they couldn't repay, by giving them flawed analysis that showed that the assets built with the loans would generate enough capital to pay off the debt. At the same time, they'd try to set up structures so that a... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Malor at 4:56 PM on January 27, 2008

Interesting article, thanks.

On a personal level, I think griefers are useful. That isn't to say that I like them, but they're a good reminder of how little anything matters. ... Griefers remind you to take an anodyne pill and stay carefree, because it just doesn't matter.

I have no idea if you're serious, but if you are, I'm here to tell you that this attitude, which you think so sophisticated and self-protective, will not... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by languagehat at 2:18 PM on January 24, 2008

If you have the money to cover your share and you are genuinely offering, you know your intentions, who cares what the guy thinks? What you are doing is fine. Offer and if they refuse, don't push it. If they are offended by a kind gesture, do you really want to continue going out with that guy?

Anecdotally, there is the Chinese way that my parents taught me when we were at dim sum with family members. Check drops, violently slam your hand down on it and forcibly take it.... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by spec80 at 12:31 PM on January 18, 2008

I have hundreds of boxes filled with things that are important to me that I need to go through. How do I decide what to throw out?

Pastabagel wrote one of the best comments ever on this subject, which I will quote here:

Coveting possessions is unhealthy. Here's how I look at it: All of the computers on Ebay are mine. In fact, everything on Ebay is already mine. All of those things are just in long term storage that I... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by aeschenkarnos at 5:11 PM on January 9, 2008

If you paid some attention to news you probably heard of the Naples trash scandal.

I got this one: They made them an offer they couldn't... refuse?
posted to MetaFilter by hal9k at 5:42 PM on January 13, 2008

When I was the person in a bad relationship (though nothing like the level you describe) and all my friends were concerned about me, here is some of what helped:
* express concern for her and draw attention to what she's going through ("Wow, that must be hard." "You seem really stressed out.")
* help her remember ("This sounds like the fight you had last weekend.")
* let her know that what is going on is out of the norm... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by salvia at 6:35 PM on January 1, 2008 marked best answer

According to psychologists, one of the tasks of the 20s is to develop a "public self." Generally on your own for the first time, with your first real job, you start defining yourself through your outward appearance of success -- partners, clothes, gadgets, house, car, music. You use such things to measure your worth against those around you, to develop a sense of who you are.

In the 30s, people start to focus more on their own inner guidance. Opinions from... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by occhiblu at 8:32 AM on November 11, 2006

"Every relationship is a power struggle. And nowhere are the combatants less equal than in a love affair. To love is to be vulnerable, naked; a declaration of love is a confession of weakness. To be loved is to be strong, pampered, armoured in the lover's ardor. The withholding of love is such a valuable weapon; it forces the lover to keep trying to scale the frosty peak of the beloved's indifference. Like danger, indifference is an aphrodisiac to a lover on the make. The challenge is both... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by mattbucher at 7:35 AM on December 4, 2007

I was walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man standing on the edge, about to jump off. I immediately ran over and said “Stop! Don’t do it!”

“Why shouldn’t I?” he said.

I said, “Well, there’s so much to live for!”

“Like what?”

“Well … are you religious or atheist?”

“Religious.”

“Me too! Are you Christian or... [more]
posted to MetaTalk by goodnewsfortheinsane at 12:50 PM on November 6, 2007

Is this seriously where we act puzzled that a religion could believe it has a monopoly on some meaningless concept, rather than act puzzled the religion believes in far crazier stories about talking animals, walking on water, and invisible space superheroes?

Seriously?


Oh, just shut... UP! You have so many threads to say something that stupid in already. This is not the "make fun of the bible" thread.... [more]
posted to MetaTalk by shmegegge at 1:25 PM on November 6, 2007

When I was a wee lass, I went to a church (populated by West Virginian coal miners, no less) which I refer to now as the Church of Raving Nutjobs.

This church had many disagreeable characteristics for a young person who liked to ask questions and who was also of the girl persuasion. I did not like being part of an organization which proudly proclaimed I was inferior and I did not like the answer to all my questions being 'Because God said so. Shut up.... [more]
posted to MetaTalk by winna at 2:03 PM on November 6, 2007

I'm sorry JP, but this is just the latest tedious example of a blowhard coming along who reads Kerouac's book shallowly, believes he is the first person on Earth to see through the Kerouac myth to the naked emperor cowering behind it, and then proceeds to inform the world of his non-insights at tiresome length, while slagging Kerouac for "poor writing." (At least Truman Capote's campy putdown, "That's not writing, it's typing," was succinct.)

These... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by digaman at 8:09 AM on October 18, 2007

I've always been in awe of Piranesi. There's something almost disturbing about his meticulousness; like Flaubert's God, passionately indifferent, missing nothing and ceding not one iota in the transference of sight to representation.
posted to MetaFilter by Haruspex at 3:35 PM on July 4, 2006

It's primarily a point about delivery, not far in its meaning from 'deadpan'. A large part of why good dry humor is amusing is a sort of self-congratulation because you, the hearer, have picked up on the intended joke without all the usual cues. It's therefore more effective among "in-groups" whose members share nuances of speech. Maybe that's why it's identified so closely with my beloved British class system.
posted to Ask Metafilter by game warden to the events rhino at 7:09 AM on September 28, 2007

People say "I am going to school to study X" and I always think "no, you are going to school to develop critical thinking skills (in general) and to develop an intuition in your chosen field (in particular)." If school was just about learning the subject material, you could read a book or two and get a degree... but they are trying to teach you how to think, and that takes a longer, more multifaceted approach.

As for those students... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by foobario at 7:43 PM on September 22, 2007

Once it is realized
that even between the closest people
infinite distances continue to exist
a wonderful living side by side
can grow up
if they succeed in loving the distance between them
that allows each to see the other
whole against the sky.

A framed copy of that Rilke poem is hanging on the wall of my parents' house.
posted to Ask Metafilter by coined at 11:04 AM on August 21, 2007

Sue me, but I sympathize.

I live in one of the cheapest countries in the world doing work that pays me a salary well above the local average. Other than the housing market, nothing's expensive in Beijing, and anything below a car-level purchase is far more than affordable.

Not going off the rails on a spending spree is hard enough. I mean, I could go out tomorrow and have a new laptop. Lots of people tell me to, because this one's 4 years... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by saysthis at 10:07 AM on August 5, 2007

It used to be that totalising institutions such as medieval Christianity would have to spend many *centuries* figuring out social processes enabling it to colonise its subjects' internal lives. And even then, its control was regularly contested by theological schisms and nationalist frenzies. Given its relatively short tenure, it's amazing that Capitalism has managed to evolve such a powerful set of actualising technologies of the self that can take root within the minds of its subject and reign... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by meehawl at 10:42 AM on August 5, 2007

greycap: would it be feles or felis? Or are they interchangeable?

Miko: A couple of months ago my husband and I were discussing things that I could possibly get as a tattoo in memory of my grandfather, and he asked if my grandfather had ever given me any words of wisdom. My grandfather was quite the character and taught me a lot of things ranging from recognizing deer tracks, flag code, and how to gut a fish, he was also the type of man who had no problem at all... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by chickygrrl at 9:44 AM on January 24, 2007

*Gazes into Amberglow's Magic Mirror of Unbiased Judgment through drips of melting pink deliciousness*

Why-why I was being a jerk! And without any sort of slimy political excuses or dissembling personal justifications beyond my own amusement!
Take it away, please, take it away!!!
posted to MetaTalk by Alvy Ampersand at 10:53 AM on July 28, 2007

I just can't believe the Australia episode is in there, given that I tend to point to it as the first episode that hints at how supremely awful the show got after season 8. It's the start of the "WACKY ADVENTURES" episode style that were a loosely connected series of gags built around a wacky premise and without a single bit of emotional warmth or character.

Why do I hate that episode so much? Because it's the first time that The Simpsons stops being The... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Pope Guilty at 2:37 PM on July 9, 2007

Actually, Anonymous, I think you're right on. I lived there for four years and (most) everything you say is true. The frat / sorority thing never dies. Almost no one I met there had traveled anywhere or done anything interesting. Every person I've met with any sort of compelling personality moved elsewhere pretty quickly. I'm not American, but I've lived other places in America, and even by Midwest standards, KC is pretty lame. The latent racism and intolerance there is unbelievable (and I... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Dee Xtrovert at 6:57 PM on June 19, 2007

I just finished reading The Republic of Pirates, which is an extremely good book. I'd recommend it to everyone here. But this has been a topic I've been interested in for a while.

As to whether pirates were moral: it really depends on who you're asking about. Some pirates, like Edward Vane or Rackham, were by all accounts murderous psychopaths. Some, like Bellamy or Hornigold, occupied a middle ground -- they weren't saints by any means, but certainly didn't go out of... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by spiderwire at 12:59 AM on June 6, 2007

Pastabagel: in sum, "What's so funny 'bout peace, love, and understanding?"

And another factor in what happened: We're gun-shy and suspicious of sincerity. We want our interactions all manufactured and scripted and clean and we generally just don't want to get involved. We see sincerity as a particularly slimy cover for forthcoming abuse &/or manipulation, and collectively we do not often show or admit to weakness, fear or vulnerability and we don't deal... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by dilettante at 4:03 PM on June 1, 2007

"May the blind, impersonal, and deterministic forces exerting statistically significant influence on the possible outcomes of the four-dimensional cross-section as limited by the boundary conditions--both implied and expressly stated--of the events we have exchanged information about align such that they strongly correlate to the possible outcome that is most favorable to you!"

I'll grant that may seem long-winded, but the very instant you start taking... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Drastic at 7:43 PM on April 17, 2007

This is going to be a big turning point in the history and character of this country, I think.
posted to MetaFilter by Doug at 6:51 AM on September 11, 2001