Favorites from amber_dale

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MeFi post: Like Serial? You'll love The Jinx.
From what I understand, the envelope is new evidence. I don't think anyone apart from the filmmakers knew about that until it aired. I'm not a legal expert, but it looks like something that could be really bad for Durst. It directly ties him to the murder.
posted to MetaFilter by triggerfinger at 3:44 PM on March 10, 2015
MeFi post: "My gender exists in some sort of quantum state."
I think a good thought experiment for what being trans is like is more along the lines of, "What if you were a cis boy but from the day you were born your parents and all of society insisted you dress and behave like a traditional girl instead and never took you seriously when you claimed that wasn't really you?"

This line of reasoning seems to suggest that there is something about "traditional girl" gender socialization, dress,... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by divined by radio at 1:26 PM on February 11, 2015
MeFi post: It's enough to make you want to stop teaching kids poetry.
No harm, no foul, sweet little guy!

this is what dating is like in a perfect socialist utopia. "Hey check out my genitals. U like?'
"No thanks!" "OK, back to our fulfilling creative careers."
posted to MetaFilter by Potomac Avenue at 5:43 AM on January 22, 2015
MeFi post: Southwest Airlines safety announcement.
The German word "fremdschämen", which means "to be embarrassed because someone else has embarrassed themselves and doesn't notice", is the perfect word for how this makes me feel.
posted to MetaFilter by dotgirl at 11:54 PM on January 5, 2015
MeFi post: "one of the best interviews you’ll ever hear, providing genuine insight"
I'm a heavy podcast listener and not a single one of my favorite podcasts was there (though Serial may end up on that list) but it did have a lot of podcasts which I listen to an occasional episode of, or listened to ten or fifteen episodes of before I started to get very diminishing returns.

Apart from anything else, not having The Bugle on there is a travesty (I'd go for the Bin Laden fuckeulogy episode, the phone hacking episodes or the one after Andy's son was born)... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Kattullus at 3:35 AM on December 16, 2014
MeFi post: Israel bombing Gaza again
At some point you get tired of it and you fire the fucking rocket.

That implies you have rockets on hand for such an occasion, the way I keep money on hand to buy lunch for days I'm too harried to make myself a sandwhich.

That's not quite how this works.

To fire the rocket, first you have to dig up some sewer pipe from the streets. Gaza's already pretty short on that material, which is why they are... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by ocschwar at 5:48 PM on July 8, 2014
MeFi post: The Child Philosopher
The Hulk one was pretty great, but philosophy for children is a real thing. Here are some examples:

Ian (six year old) found to his chagrin that the three children of his parents' friends monopolized the television; they kept him from watching his favorite program. “Mother,” he asked in frustration, “why is it better for three children to be selfish than one?”

Jordan (five years), going to bed at eight one evening, asked, “If I go to bed at eight... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by anotherpanacea at 10:51 AM on October 24, 2013
MeFi post: Communication not as a state of emergency.
This can come across as a kind of magical thinking that makes people stay in abusive relationships, because of course my partner only wants the best for me.

To be fair, damn near any aspect of a healthy, functional relationship is found wanting if you project it onto an abusive relationship. But that's a problem with the relationship, not the concept of trust.

By the time you get to calling the other person a... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by A god with hooves, a god with horns at 2:45 PM on July 15, 2013
MeFi post: Basically, She's A Lannister
Funnily enough I am reading Russia : A History at the moment and have literally just finished learning this morning about the early Rus including Olga, wife of Igor and mother of Sviatoslav. It's part of my ongoing "learn a ton of stuff about random subjects" program (currently the subjecty is "Russia!"). I'm flitting between that, The Icon and the Axe, the Russian Rulers Podcast and Martin Sixsmith's Russia. Round about now is where I start soliciting... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by longbaugh at 11:55 PM on July 10, 2013
Ask MeFi post: Inspiration — not motivation — for writing.
Context: I'm a professional screenwriter. I wrote the movie SYLVIA. The following works for me. I'm not saying it will work for anything else.

Start with three sentences representing the beginning, middle and end of your story.

Boy meets girl. Boy loses girl. Boy gets girl back.

Woman buys house. House turns out to be haunted. Woman defeats ghosts.

Those are dumb examples but you get the idea.... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by unSane at 5:48 PM on January 15, 2006 marked best answer
MeFi post: NSFW. Changing female body image through art
prior art: Plaster Caster
posted to MetaFilter by Xyanthilous P. Harrierstick at 5:50 AM on January 17, 2013
Ask MeFi post: Christmas Wish List Headache
Someone just gave me fleece sheets like these that I did not want at all and they have turned out to be the best thing in the entire world. They are somehow cozy without being too warm, which is an issue for me with sleeping. I'm giving them to a bunch of people this Christmas whether they want them or not.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by something something at 12:36 PM on November 28, 2012
Ask MeFi post: cheesy like david hasselhoff
Many people including myself have found that it is easier to learn hard cheesemaking if you start with soft cheeses-- which start with yogurt, mostly. So I'd encourage you to begin there. I've written before about a good way to get your feet wet in the hobby without buying any special equipment other than a candy thermometer. Making yogurt the way Dr. Fankhauser suggests is not only fun, but naturally leads you towards making hard cheeses if you are interested. (Totally off-topic, but the... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by seasparrow at 8:39 PM on October 31, 2012
MeFi post: Frightening fiction
Speaking of scary stories, Bill Ponzini's "Peekaboo" gets me every. damn. time.
posted to MetaFilter by magstheaxe at 1:19 PM on October 25, 2012
MeFi post: He cried during the last “Lord of the Rings” movie.
When I should have broken up with her: picked her up on our second date, and as we're driving away from her house, she looks sadly at me and says, "Why don't you ever tell me I'm pretty?" Second date. Like fifteen seconds into it. I should have just turned around and dropped her back off, but, y'know, callow youth and all that.

When I did break up with her: I bought a video game I was very excited to play and was about to call her to cancel our evening, because... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Errant at 5:14 PM on February 3, 2012
MeFi post: Needs Moar Uncanny Everything
*bane voice*
I you give a mouse a cookie, then you are only doing what is right.
For too long you have hoarded the carb-rich food for yourself, allowing the mouse to starve amid your decadence.
And for this your punishment must be more severe.
posted to MetaFilter by codacorolla at 7:31 AM on August 8, 2012
Ask MeFi post: Prospective father-in-law rejected marriage proposal request. What now?
My steps 1-2-3 are kind of based on a playful relationship, though, if you think she would respond better to direct conversation, do that. I've been proposed to in the past, and it didn't even work out, but I really treasured the proposal itself, tbh. It's important to some people.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by stoneandstar at 12:43 AM on July 18, 2012
MeFi post: I do my little turn on the catwalk...
Such impressive uniforms. But one of these things is not like the other ...foreign conscript, maybe.

Great gallery, gman, thanks. Rio Wang is consistently one of my favorite blogs, full of treasures.

Here is an interesting gallery of civilians - a decade or two earlier, but of the era: cartes-de-visite showing Russian 'types.... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by madamjujujive at 5:30 PM on June 30, 2012
MeFi post: A song to the bearded glacier
Mar-tin was a man.
Okay, he was a dragon-man.
Maybe he was just a dragon.
But he was still
posted to MetaFilter by bicyclefish at 10:42 PM on June 26, 2012
Ask MeFi post: These sites have DD+ sections, where's the A- section?
There's a lot of lovely on What Katie Did if you want to go classic/retro.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by merocet at 8:32 AM on June 25, 2012
Ask MeFi post: Help me be okay with looking like a dork.
I suggest very strongly that you get many, many, many more opportunities to speak in front of people. MANY. This is the very best thing you can do. I cannot stress this hard enough. Practice on video or in your car is an OK alternative, but what you really need is to do lots of different presentations in front of lots of different audiences. You should try to find places to practice outside of work - church, clubs, whatever. You will see significant... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by SMPA at 4:49 PM on April 26, 2012
Ask MeFi post: Am I really this shallow?
Pot costs money, too. If you're not smoking it with him, you might be surprised at how much it costs. Even without knowing any of the particulars, I feel confident that a week's supply for a daily user = a whale watch, at least.

I have been in your situation. I spent my early twenties hoping that my boyfriend would hit me so I would feel entitled to break up with him. Then I spent my mid-twenties engaged to a different guy, thinking it was tolerable because he was a... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by gentian at 9:00 PM on March 16, 2012 marked best answer
MeFi post: Mad Max Rock City
Where else do the police come to your house after you’ve been robbed and ask you, ‘Why did you call us?"


Or Philaddelphia.

In the fall of 2007, My wife and I had just moved to the City of Brotherly Love from Canada via Holland. We rented a beautiful home in Brewery town at Poplar and 29th.

It's famously said that Philadelphia is a "block to block" city.... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by 256 at 6:55 PM on February 24, 2012
Ask MeFi post: Google search result: Can this damage be undone?
1. Save the full http-ey URL of the document for future reference.
2. Have the school remove (or amend) the page.
3. Submit the URL from #1, manually, to Google to index, with this form.

Whatever Google finds at the URL replaces the old one in search results. Presto fix-o.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by rokusan at 11:49 PM on January 29, 2012 marked best answer
MeFi post: Whoops.
so. much. stupid.
posted to MetaFilter by Theta States at 2:11 PM on January 12, 2012
MeFi post: Never talk to a Style reporter!
During a particularly low moment when I was renting a room from a hirsute and under-groomed schizotypal, sleeping on a borrowed futon and eating beans from a can, I had three (three!) ex-girlfriends announce their weddings in the Times over the course of a semester. I stumbled across the third (with a photo!) as I sat, pants around my ankles, on a fetid commode literally begging my angry colon to unburden itself.

I actually don't think I've read the Sunday Styles... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by R. Schlock at 10:11 AM on December 2, 2011
Ask MeFi post: A poem or quote to bring a tear to the eye of the grandfather who raised the bride
I've heard this in wedding vows, and once as a toast.

My True Love Hath My Heart
by Sir Philip Sidney (1554-1586)

My true-love hath my heart, and I have his,
By just exchange one for another given:
I hold his dear, and mine he cannot miss,
There never was a better bargain driven:
My true-love hath my heart, and I have his.

His heart in me keeps him and me in one,... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by chana meira at 5:19 PM on February 20, 2010
MeFi post: Feel like a phony? Just fake it till you make it.
In my research assistant job, I constantly feel like I have no goddamn idea what I am doing and have had to learn the skill of just powering forward regardless, asking questions and looking things up and just generally getting on with it to the best of my ability. I have had to make peace with the fact that 90% of the time my experiments are going to go wrong, and 90% of the time nobody will be able to tell the difference between something that went wrong because I screwed up and something that... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Scientist at 3:35 PM on November 3, 2011
Ask MeFi post: This really won't let me go. Please be my internet friends and counsel me.
1. Forgive yourself. Forgive your past self. You didn't know how to be responsible - that's disappointing. But no one got hurt! You slacked off on trivial responsibilities. That's the up side. You made a minor social mistake while still young, just like lots of people. You have the chance to learn from it, to be gradually more responsible and more thoughtful about the responsibilities you take on. What you did was tiny and ordinary. No one should feel bad about... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Frowner at 9:22 AM on November 1, 2011
MeFi post: "He is, it goes without saying, a popular, popular man at dinner parties."
> Yeah, I imagine it's near impossible to eat a lethal dose of cannabis.

Maybe, but don't kid yourself.

If anyone needs any volunteers for test subjects I'm certainly willing to try. You know, for science.

I've yet to achieve this theoretical-to-me "too stoned" state and it's certainly not from a lack of trying. So far the biggest danger has been eating too much ice cream or cookies or... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by loquacious at 11:12 AM on October 16, 2011
Ask MeFi post: Help me find a prose reading for my best friend's wedding!
Not exactly what you wanted, but I think of Hermann Hesse when I read the question:

"One never reaches home,' she said. 'But where paths that have an affinity for each other intersect, the whole world looks like home, for a time.'"
posted to Ask MetaFilter by kcm at 9:21 AM on September 22, 2011
MeFi post: Orange safety vests may be worn by men and young girls, they bring too much attention to ladies.
I am always amused by people who think they can out-lawyer God

Right now I'm reading book 16 in Susanna Gregory's medieval Cambridge books. The Killer of Pilgrims revolves about the badges that pilgrims could buy from sacred shrines throughout Christendom. These tokens, or signacula, were said to have various properties-- from pardoning sins to automatic entry into heaven. There is one scene which has a widow demanding her... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Secret Life of Gravy at 12:01 PM on August 27, 2011
MeFi post: Vodka is tasteless going down, but it is memorable coming up.
Vodka's great for making infusions and liqueurs. (current favorite: Ceylon cinnamon liqueur + nigori sake. (1:4 ratio) I call that a Horchata-Plus)

Otherwise, yeah, why not use gin or whiskey or rum or tequila or something.
posted to MetaFilter by aubilenon at 9:59 PM on August 21, 2011
MeFi post: Supermodel Superfugly
Dark matte lips and lip liner. Urban Decay. Plaid flannel shirts. Eyebrows tweezed almost to nothing. Sometimes false eyelashes. Backpacks that became smaller with time as lipstick became darker and more earth toned (to the point where I could use my eyebrow pencil as lipstick). High, chunky, platformed shoes. Little dresses with tights worn with the biggest, heaviest combat boots in the world. Hair thrown up in a loose twist/bun with deep side-parted bangs. Shag-like-layers and tiny... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Greg Nog at 7:40 PM on August 9, 2011
Ask MeFi post: Any good wedding readings or vows?
here we go:

The love of god, unutterable and perfect, flows into a pure soul the way light rushes into a transparent object. The more love we receive, the more love we radiate; so that, as we grow clear and open, the more complete the joy of loving is. And the more souls who resonate together, the greater the intensity of their love, for mirror-like, each soul reflects the other.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by clairezulkey at 8:57 AM on July 10, 2006
MeFi post: Those ubiquitous Tourmobiles in DC
The National Park Service acts like it's an occupying army in Washington DC.

The park police are noted for their extreme brutality, and enforcement of nonexistent laws and regulations, drawing the ire of both the Mayor, our fake congressional representative, and the [actual] DC Chief of Police. They are literally accountable to no one.

It also doesn't help that the NPS's PR guy evidently got his training on the other side of the iron curtain.... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by schmod at 7:19 AM on July 29, 2011
MeFi post: "the existence of greater crimes does not excuse lesser crimes"
I feel much better about myself after reading this thread. My lack of social skills is so much less than I thought.
posted to MetaFilter by five fresh fish at 6:51 AM on July 5, 2011
MeFi post: Does the chart mean no one actually likes PBR unironically?
I want to believe this chart was created entirely tongue-in-cheek. Otherwise if this isn't some kind of joke that GQ is trying to pull one over in some kind of "cool hunter" mimicking hoax, I think GQ is confusing high and middle brow with poshlost. In fact, the inclusion of Odd Future in the high-brow section only confirms it.
posted to MetaFilter by kkokkodalk at 4:42 PM on June 27, 2011
Ask MeFi post: Help me open the vintage store of my dreams.
"I have little-to-no experience with running a small business. / What should I be doing that I'm not doing already?"

Take a close look at this book - The E-Myth Revisited: Why Most Small Businesses Don't Work and What to Do About It, as it is an eye-opener to anyone considering starting a small business. Do you really want to 'purchase a job'?

If you could read and apply the principles in this book, then you would have something... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by scooterdog at 12:16 PM on June 19, 2011
MeFi post: "Save The World" by Swedish House Mafia
Every superhero dog pack has to have a beagle.
And there should have been a chihuahua laying down supressing fire.
posted to MetaFilter by clavdivs at 12:18 AM on May 28, 2011
MeFi post: Hit me up!
Pitchfork has such a hard-on for the whole OFWGKTA it's not even funny.

That said, misogyny sells. It always has. And for every Tegan and Sara there's some female womens' studies grad student who probably loves the "edgy" rush of defending the "authenticity" of Tyler, Earl, etc.

Personally, I can take or leave their music. If it was truly amazing I'd probably be willing to accept the misogyny as "ironic" or what... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by bardic at 6:45 PM on May 16, 2011
MeFi post: Callil's complaint
This says much more about you than it does about Mailer, Roth, Bellow and Updike.

The fact that someone doesn't like cookie-cutter novels about middle-aged dudes with midlife crises who obsess constantly about two-dimensional mothers/vamps/lolitas while ruminating pseudo-intellectually about whatever happened to be reviewed in the NYRB issue located closest to the author's typewriter doesn't mean they have bad taste or they're philistines or whatever.
posted to MetaFilter by nasreddin at 11:04 AM on May 18, 2011
Ask MeFi post: I can stop whenever I want.... Too many frappuccinos?
I'm also a little surprised by the number of people who see this as controlling. (But no, GF, you can't protest every single day; that's just nagging. And I say that as someone with a deep-seated urge to nag about this kind of thing.)

First, in my world, $150 would be close to the monthly budget for "fun stuff" for one person. If that was ALL the fun stuff you bought, I'd STFU, but presumably you also buy books or video games or trips to fun places or other... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Eyebrows McGee at 5:38 AM on May 8, 2011
Ask MeFi post: What clever relationship "hacks" have you come up with?
At last it is time to reveal to an unwitting world the great game of Moral High Ground. Moral High Ground is a long-playing game for two players. The following original rules are for one M and one F, but feel free to modify them to suit your player setup:

1. The object of Moral High Ground is to win.

2. Players proceed towards victory by scoring MHGPs (Moral High Ground Points). MHGPs are scored by taking the conspicuously and/or... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by stuck on an island at 11:36 AM on November 3, 2009
MeFi post: A Review of Sucker Punch
I think that this review probably deserved an FPP of its own...but it might just be because I think that Alyssa Rosenberg is beyond awesome.
posted to MetaFilter by Hypnotic Chick at 3:14 PM on March 28, 2011
Ask MeFi post: Is lack of sex worth ending a marriage over?
I think there is this angle that many women don't comprehend or feel until after they are married (and have kids - the kids part seems a big component to it). It's hard for me to articulate it, and I know other women feel it but often I think it's unconscious, because it's so hard to unpack and think about. It's easier to just blame him, or the marriage.

When you're a young, single woman a large part of your worth in society is measured in your ability to be desirable... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by flex at 7:46 AM on March 24, 2011
Honestly, I think most women (I would estimate at least most women of my generation and older) had very very little encouragement in figuring out what they wanted sexually before marriage. In my opinion, women are often socialized to experience sex early in the relationship as a victory--see, I am desirable, I am what a woman should be!--and the feelings of victory wear off, and then because women are socialized to ignore and minimize... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Frowner at 5:14 AM on March 24, 2011
I can't favorite saucysault's answer enough. I am (not literally) your wife. Your question and saucysault's answer describe our situation to a tee. I adore my husband and really really really I do want to be intimate with him, but... I'm just too tired.

We have 3 kids under 5 and all the childcare, chores, and financials are my responsibility. From 6am when they wake me up til sometimes 9:30pm (or later) when they go to bed the kid responsibility is all mine. Once... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by ellenaim at 3:57 AM on March 24, 2011
MeFi post: Guilty Dog
One of my dogs lovedlovedloved raw eggs. When he discovered that the eggs live in the big white box, he taught himself to open the box and grab the eggs for a mid-day treat. When I got home, the fridge door was open, the empty carton was splayed out in front of it, there were tiny bits of shell scattered on the floor, and the dog was looking shifty-eyed. I pointed to the mess and sent him to the bad-dog corner on the deck. Over the next few weeks, he taught himself to shut the door, hide the... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by dogrose at 3:22 PM on March 17, 2011
Ask MeFi post: Personal recommendation for alterations in the DC-NoVA area?
My wife and I have extensive personal experience with the work of Cheryl Lofton, who is simply outstanding.

(Since you mentioned it, she is also extremely highly-rated on Yelp!, but we discovered her before her Yelp! fame, and can testify that the reviews match reality.)
posted to Ask MetaFilter by willbaude at 7:43 AM on July 1, 2010 marked best answer
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