I just read felix betachat's links and Mrs. Anderson's hate-filled screed ALMOST made me like Clay Aiken for a second.

Evidently all that stuff about loving your neighbor doesn't apply to fags and libruls. Or fag-loving libruls.

The pee video was, I thought, funny, in a ha-ha lookit the crazy preacher kinda way. But her blog... Wow. That's a concentrated dose of hatred right there.

Now I am sad.
posted to MetaFilter by BitterOldPunk at 12:21 PM on October 8, 2008

OH MY GOD!

FIrst off, this is just about two years old, but my roommate and his sister were working on Martha when this was shot, and I distinctly remember his coming home that night beaming with the creepiest Martha Stewart story ever.

Some things:

First, there was a bit of a mini-panic backstage trying to find a plain black t-shirt for the baby in the turkey suit. One of the P.A.s (or maybe another department) had a... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Navelgazer at 5:33 PM on October 7, 2008

Fucking yuck to that.

I will still continue to eat everything from the sea however, because that's where god hid all the delicious shit. I will just continue to pretend that the worms, boogers, filth and botulism are only in other peoples food.
posted to MetaFilter by Divine_Wino at 8:12 AM on October 2, 2008

No. You're not only not going to do that viral astroturfing shit here, I forbid you from doing it anywhere. This is now the seventh time (I've been keeping track) that I've heard the republican spin that the housing crisis is caused by Hispanics/black/minorities/poor. A memo must have gone out the night Paulson proposed the plan because jowly white douchebags from all over are all simultaneously on board with the same talking points.

Let me be perfectly clear. It is... [more]
posted to MetaTalk by Pastabagel at 8:39 AM on September 30, 2008

I'm scanning photos at the moment too, because I'm transcribing hundreds of little contributions my grandmother sent to newspapers back in the 60s. I installed Vuescan and I can't believe how much smoother and easier it is to use than the epilepsy-inducing fight between my regular scanner driver and photoshop. Auto-saves to file and everything, so I can surf the web while it does its business, flick back and put another picture on the scanner, click scan. Nice. (I'm scanning pages of pictures,... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by slightlybewildered at 1:01 PM on September 29, 2008

When I think of the great lakes, nachos is the last thing that comes to mind, preceded in my thoughts only slightly by Ray Harryhausen.
posted to MetaFilter by Navelgazer at 10:50 AM on September 25, 2008

Wow.
posted to MetaFilter by Suparnova at 6:21 PM on September 24, 2008

I heard the new Metallica album, and it sounds pretty decent, I just, for the life of me, can't get myself to care.

I imagine it's like finally getting with a highschool crush, at the 20 year reunion, and she's still pretty and she's still the same girl you fell for some years ago, and it feels right but... it's late, you've had a few, and really, stealing off into some empty classroom to tear each other's clothes off like they do in the movies just seems like a lot of... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Uther Bentrazor at 5:20 AM on September 23, 2008

Also:

just do what the intelligent ones do, iggy me.

What, roll around in peanut butter and broken glass?
posted to MetaFilter by Merzbau at 10:39 PM on September 19, 2008

Just got off a conference call with the Texas Emergency Operations Center. Here is the timeline that they are working off of. Expecting a high 2 or low 3 level hurricane.

7 PM--Hurricane force winds hit Houston. Port Arthur is hit by storm surge.
1 AM (Saturday)--Ike's Eye passes over Galveston. Galveston Bay and Sabine Bay hit by storm surge.
4 AM--Hurricane wind exits impact zone heading N NW

Rainfall expected to be... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by zerobyproxy at 9:20 AM on September 12, 2008

Just off the TX state EOC afternoon call. Here is what they are planning for and have done.

The landfall area is Galveston (plus or minus 30 miles).

87 Shelters open with a total of 100 to be open by tomorrow morning.

Ike will make landfall with a 23 foot surge and may come down the shipping canal. This will take place at approximately 2 AM.

Jefferson/Orange counties will experience a 20 foot... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by zerobyproxy at 3:15 PM on September 12, 2008

To prepare yourself for a storm:

I'll assme you've read all the stuff about getting cash, drugs, tarps, etc - but want to know what it's like living through the aftermath of a storm....

Prep begins the day before. Eat all the ice cream in the freezer. It builds strong bones, you know! Got any milk in the refrigerator? Put it in small bottles and freeze for later use. If you have children in the mix, they are much harder to please, so think... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by mightshould at 8:15 AM on September 11, 2008

Gah! I've seen more tasteful lobbies in casinos.
posted to MetaFilter by Relay at 12:03 PM on September 11, 2008

You may also want to have a specific brand of alcohol in mind when ordering you drink. This way you 1) avoid being stiffed with cheap alcohol and 2) can try out two different kinds of, say, gin, and develop your tastes.

Drink a vodka martini, a gin martini (really just a 'martini' since gin is the traditional ingredient), and a dirty martini. Then drink something stupid like sour apple martini and wonder where the world went wrong.
posted to Ask Metafilter by acidic at 6:27 PM on August 22, 2008

Librarian 1: "So literacy and reading rates are really in full-scale decline all around the country. Hardly anybody comes in here any more, even though we have effectively stupefied our collection by ditching everything over 200 pages that isn't by Dan Brown, cancelled our Atlantic subscription in favour of an extra Guns & Ammo, put in a whole new 'Ow, My Balls!' DVD section and there's an Xbox in the corner for the children to throw up on. Our... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by turgid dahlia at 4:56 PM on July 30, 2008

Alright, guess I gotta be the one to transcribe this shit:



Punch 'em in the dick
(What)
Punch 'em in the dick
(What)
Fuckers talk shit
I'ma punch 'em in the dick
(Bow!)
Punch 'em in the diiiiick
Punch 'em in the diiiiick
Motherfuckers talk shit
I'ma punch 'em in the dick

Yo look at that... [more]
posted to MeFi Music by dgaicun at 8:31 AM on August 5, 2008

Have I now "arrived"?

You were only waiting
For this Mer-Mann to arrive
posted to MetaTalk by cortex at 10:31 AM on August 22, 2008

I have enjoyed the company of more than a dozen cats over the years, and had to make the decision about euthanasia several times. My obese kitties have almost always died relatively young compared to the skinny ones, and usually without my intervention. (Fat ones died at 10 or so, three skinnies lived to almost 20.)

When the quality of life and/or the prospects of return to quality of life decline to low levels, I usually go ahead and do it. Cats purr when they are... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by FauxScot at 8:31 AM on August 22, 2008

I'm just waiting for Spock to show up and utter a colorful metaphor (since he did so much LDS in the 60s) and scoop up that baby whale.
posted to MetaFilter by frecklefaerie at 8:54 PM on August 20, 2008

The capacity of modern American society to understand, much less appreciate, the Jeffersonian concept of a "wall" between government and religion is sorely lacking.

Lemmings get the government they deserve, I guess. Unfortunately, they push the rest of us off the cliff, too.
posted to MetaFilter by Benny Andajetz at 7:11 PM on August 20, 2008

Wow, I wonder if that overzealous security check was responsible for my flight delay yesterday. I flew American Eagle from ORD to DAL, but the 7:00 am flight was delayed and shifted to a different gate, even though there was a plane clearly parked at the initial gate.

(Geek mode on. BZAP!)

Probably not -- probably just a mechanical. But possible. Also possible that the plane was there but the crew wasn't, and the crew they had... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by eriko at 6:12 AM on August 20, 2008

Would it make more sense that a cosmic Jewish zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree?
posted to MetaFilter by C17H19NO3 at 9:33 AM on August 14, 2008

she said in 1999: 'I loved Kirk and all I really wanted was to see his blond-haired babies running round my home.

If that is indeed a photograph of Kirk in the second link, his hair is coal black, boot polish black, blacker-than-Satan's-heart black. Was she anticipating that her blond genes would chloroform, handcuff and spread-eagle his genes into submission?
posted to MetaFilter by Secret Life of Gravy at 5:08 PM on August 8, 2008

That birdlike sound from Pacific State is an absolute aural touchstone for me. It marks the start point of a lifetime love of House, Electronica, and Trance. I think it was on maybe the second or third CD I ever bought.

Wasn't that a mad time when you had to choose between cassette, vinyl, and CD versions of the same album? Do you get the tape so you can listen to it in the car immediately, or buy the CD and a couple of über expensive Metal tapes? Ahhhh memories.
posted to MetaFilter by pivotal at 3:38 AM on August 8, 2008

See also, recent news about pipeline fires and sabotage in the region.

At this point, I humbly suggest that all fpp's about conflicts in this region be accompanied by pipeline maps or oil field maps. We all know these conflicts are about energy, but the conflicts are going to be spun in the media and by governments as ethnic conflicts or battles for political (rather than economic) independence solely to agitate the local people to action and to keep the corporate and... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Pastabagel at 8:36 AM on August 8, 2008

\____________
_ O______O
RIP. Ray was great in the Bones Brigade videos.
posted to MetaFilter by porn in the woods at 10:21 PM on August 1, 2008

Silly AdBusters. Youth culture is for kids.

What I think is damn near impossible for any recently succeeded generation to accept is that your parents did not, in fact, look down upon the "revolutionary" trappings of your adolescent obsessions because said obsessions were too h@rdk0r3 for them to deal with. Your parents looked down on your adolescent obsessions because those obsessions, to them, were fucking stupid recycled rehash that was... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by kittens for breakfast at 7:47 AM on August 1, 2008

and the hair metal list dosen't include 'Bathroom Wall" by faster Pussycat. These people have shit for brains.
posted to MetaFilter by jonmc at 5:43 PM on July 27, 2008

When he's not being repressed by video games and computers, Elden blasts music — mostly techno — and carries around a big bag of angst, mostly around the fact that he is "so over" high school.

This is me when that album came out. Which means that in the years since "Nevermind," enough time has passed for someone to learn to walk, talk, hit a baseball, learn to drive, have a first kiss, become me.

I feel old.
posted to MetaFilter by donpedro at 11:20 PM on July 27, 2008

I think it would be even cooler if every starling screeched "Tell me what you know, Dr. Lecter!"
posted to MetaFilter by longsleeves at 12:09 AM on July 26, 2008

Lifetime needs to end its long and harrowing career. Maybe it could go out with a movie about its rocky marriage to SpikeTV (an internet porn addict and drug-dealer who cheated on her with MTV2). Lifetime could bundle up her little daughters, Noggin and The Disney Channel and hurry off in the middle of the night. Safely resettled in an idyllic HGTVborhood, Lifetime and her little ones would slowly relax, losing their fear that Spike would come after them. Shortly after Lifetime and her new love... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Flipping_Hades_Terwilliger at 4:04 PM on July 22, 2008

its its its its its

I believe the phrase you're looking for is 'a ballroom blitz'.
posted to MetaFilter by spicynuts at 6:49 AM on July 21, 2008

(Er, the Alton Brown popcorn method. No special equipment required).
posted to Ask Metafilter by nanojath at 12:37 PM on July 11, 2008

Missed one.

Digital Underground playing "Same Song" in Nothing But Trouble, a Chevy Chase / Dan Ackroyd debacle. The movie is horrid, but the track is freakin' great. They performed "Tie The Knot" as well, but I'm not finding it on YouTube.
posted to MetaFilter by grabbingsand at 6:57 PM on July 7, 2008

That was disappointing, although predictable. You walk into someone else's house to rob them and die, too bad for you. You have put someone in fear of their life and if you lose yours over it I will not weep for you. If someone is leaving with the loot, death just does not seem appropriate. Winging them? Yeah, but you just can't cut the law that finely. I love, love, love Texas, but this is just not right.
posted to MetaTalk by caddis at 5:20 PM on June 30, 2008

Crapmatic: You're missing what is, in my view, the best website on the internet for kids that age and the only one I actually pay for because my kids enjoy it so much (though the free version is fine), Up To Ten. You want the Boowa and Kwala section for your four year-old.
posted to MetaFilter by The Bellman at 6:50 AM on June 26, 2008

One of my favorites.

"Religion has convinced people that there’s an invisible man…living in the sky, who watches everything you do every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a list of ten specific things he doesn’t want you to do. And if you do any of these things, he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever, and suffer and burn and scream until the end of time. But he loves you. He... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Mr_Zero at 10:47 PM on June 22, 2008

When the alternative is serious drugs for an indefinite amount of time, what could it possibly hurt to try?

My parents tried everything else, before meds. As a result, for years I couldn't make friends, couldn't concentrate in school, was ostracized, and felt crazy. Everyone was angry with me pretty much all of the time and I didn't know why. The long shot is I can barely remember my childhood.

I started taking meds in my... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Deathalicious at 10:07 PM on June 19, 2008

Oh man, I KNEW trees were scary! Things that are scary about them: hundreds of hard brown arms; knotholes; sometimes they are mossy; leaves in the summer and none in the winter; some of them are hollow and some of them are not; is that a nest or is it a human head; photosynthesis demons inside them; squirrel pantries inside them; horrible hidden chairs inside them. Plus the wind is fucking them regular right before our eyes. I'm going to run to my... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Powerful Religious Baby at 8:59 PM on June 17, 2008

Hopefully, he will create a cabinet level department of funk.
posted to MetaFilter by vrakatar at 6:49 PM on June 13, 2008

AAAAAGH NO WRONG GET OUT OF MY MIND YOU FILTH

There's only one kind of Tetris. The pieces "click" down the well, they don't scroll smoothly. You can't rotate pieces through other pieces or the walls or floor, but you can slide for a moment after a soft landing. You can rotate one direction or both directions with one or two buttons, respectively. Pressing down does not immediately drop the piece, rather it accelerates down, but holding the down button down will... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by loquacious at 11:23 PM on June 12, 2008

"The 1-year-old Roe Deer — nicknamed "Unicorn" — was born in captivity...

Did someone cut the budget at the Department of Creative Nicknames?
posted to MetaFilter by rokusan at 10:22 AM on June 12, 2008

BUDGIE.
posted to MetaFilter by Sailormom at 8:37 AM on June 12, 2008

Crocodile Rock is not to be missed!
posted to MetaFilter by Miko at 8:58 PM on June 12, 2008

Ahhh, memories...

Five years or so ago, I spent a long weekend with friends holed up in one of the most ridiculously opulent houses in New Canaan, CT, drinking for three days straight and figuring out what we were going to try to do to break into the film and television world. On the last day, having come up with much shenanigans and no ideas, we were all half-unconscious on couches watching Muppets From Space, which is my personal favorite Muppet... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Navelgazer at 9:07 PM on June 12, 2008

i worked as a PSO several years ago. there's plenty of decent info on the internets, dearie. join a few boards, (especially PSOChatandSupport), and read the archives. the links for resources and reputable companies are out there--phoneslutdiary.com has a few places listed that, from my experience years ago, are worthwhile to check out--if they still are operating. (she--Doxy Wringer-- quit the biz some time ago, but was really the smartest and most honest PSO i ever ran into, and worth reading... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by RedEmma at 3:19 PM on June 11, 2008 marked best answer

I'm the only one not looking at the robot, aren't I?
posted to MetaFilter by CunningLinguist at 11:17 AM on June 11, 2008

Were there other Shave-bots, with other masters?

I was going to comment on the ridiculousness of having a shavebot that had to manually install a shaver in it's arm, before I realized that it's a general wife-/slavebot. Presumably the shaving is just the first duty, she then goes on to sensually caress some pancakes for breakfast before french kissing the baby awake.
posted to MetaFilter by DU at 12:32 PM on June 11, 2008

I don’t think I’ve gone to a major concert since cell phones became popular but concerts were already ruined.

Drunk frat boys singing along… badly.

Idiots doing the “noodle dance”… badly.

Overpriced tickets.

People talking constantly.

People who can’t handle whatever substances they’re on.

Pretty much everyone in the room who isn’t me or the band.
posted to MetaFilter by bondcliff at 7:07 AM on June 10, 2008

This may be a weird answer, but getting my hair done at a nice salon does it for me. I always come out feeling and looking great and looking like I feel great. My sense of relaxation and confidence are more attractive than the 'do, I think.
posted to Ask Metafilter by sunshinesky at 6:51 PM on June 5, 2008