Phalene's Useful Skills for Navigating the World

1) Make small talk and practice social niceties such as paying and receiving compliments. Every culture has social standards. Learn yours.

2) Ask coercively, using emotional techniques. Form a logical argument. Know when to apply either to a given situation, and know the difference when others seek to prove something to you.

3) Care for children of all ages, from a... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Phalene at 11:10 AM on October 3, 2008

I grew up on a farm, and as a small child one of my jobs was to get the eggs in the morning. Each morning I woke up, went out to the barn and fought evil, vicious chickens for their unborn children. I was pecked bloody on my hands, and once, a very agressive hen chased me into the pigpen. I still have scars on my adult hands from those chickens. I *hate* chickens and firmly believe that they are among the most evil of animals.

That said, when the time came to kill... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by teleri025 at 12:00 PM on October 3, 2008

This is a great idea. When the vodka bottle starts to talk and tells you to kill your family, scattering their flayed skins over the dead tree down by the crossroads to form the tattered, gory backdrop to your alcohol-slurred chants calling for the Rising of the Stones of Lund and the Benediction of the Seven Dread Benefactors while you dance widdershins about a flame fueled by the dung and hair of a left handed goat, you'll know you've had enough to drink.

"Hah-ha!... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by robocop is bleeding at 6:03 AM on October 2, 2008

My fellow Americans, I want to take a few moments of your time to talk to you today about John McCain's decision to call timeout in his campaign.

I just want to say, I agree with his idea wholeheartedly. Wholeheartedly. (beat) It is, finally, a good step in the right direction -- a step that frankly I think we all wish would have happened, somehow, sooner.

If only he had called timeout when he was trying to gut the regulators in the 1980s.... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by felix at 1:05 PM on September 24, 2008

The ECONOMYS been KIDNAPPED by NINJAS. Are you a BAD ENOUGH D00D to SAVE IT?!?!?!?

John McCain: "I'm BAD!"
posted to MetaFilter by kaibutsu at 9:32 PM on September 24, 2008

in immediate risk of a depression look pretty goddamn fucking ridiculous.

Do you know what caused the Great Depression? Too-low interest rates that fueled a credit-based economic boom that expanded the money supply in the twenties. Sound familiar?

Interest rates hit a low in mid to late 2005. 2005 marks the peak of the housing boom, i.e. the mortgage-based economic boom that inflated the money supply. But you want to know... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Pastabagel at 10:59 PM on September 24, 2008

I don't believe that Palin is stupid. I'm sure there are topics upon which she can wax rhapsodic. She just clearly knows as much about national and international affairs as I do about major league baseball. If I were put on the spot about sports, and I felt I had to give answers and couldn't admit my ignorance, I'd probably sound like Palin. (Martinez has to play good defense, and the infield fly rule, plus you don't want to leave a man on base ...).... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Miko at 7:13 PM on September 30, 2008

No. You're not only not going to do that viral astroturfing shit here, I forbid you from doing it anywhere. This is now the seventh time (I've been keeping track) that I've heard the republican spin that the housing crisis is caused by Hispanics/black/minorities/poor. A memo must have gone out the night Paulson proposed the plan because jowly white douchebags from all over are all simultaneously on board with the same talking points.

Let me be perfectly clear. It is... [more]
posted to MetaTalk by Pastabagel at 8:39 AM on September 30, 2008

A couple of years ago, I did a play at the Westport Country Playhouse. At the end of the first week of rehearsal, we were invited to dinner at "a board member's house" after rehearsal on Sunday evening. I didn't want to go - I was tired and cranky and the show was not going well. Add to that the two hour commute home to Brooklyn and I pretty much just wanted to bail, sneak over to the train station and be done with it. I'd profusely apologize Tuesday morning, claiming illness or... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by TryTheTilapia at 9:14 AM on September 27, 2008

Ah very interest set of links - many thanks for posting!!

A good book to read to get an idea of the overall environment leading up to The Great Depression is Galbraith's The Great Crash 1929. Needless to say, there are many parallels to the present, between stock market and real estate asset bubbles observed back then and what we're going through now (real estate and credit derivatives).

The US Banking system back then was... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Mutant at 4:31 AM on September 29, 2008

Ah, Metafilter. Just when I think I enjoyed something, I can come here to find out how wrong I was.
posted to MetaFilter by LooseFilter at 6:49 PM on September 28, 2008

"Rebellious Witch Whores" is my favorite breakfast cereal.
posted to MetaFilter by lore at 5:17 PM on September 19, 2008

I had two identical twin brothers from the Phillipines in basic Training with me when I joined the Army. Their goal, apparently, was an honorable military job and then citizenship. Unfortunately, one of them couldn't shoot worth a crap. Which seemed odd to me, since they were identical twins. Maybe the bad shooter had a head injury or something, I dunno.

Well, when it came time to qualify, the bad shooter twin was next to me. His brother had already passed the... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by jamstigator at 7:57 PM on September 24, 2008

Forever is a mighty long time, but I'm here to tell you, there's something else: the afterworld. A world of never-ending happiness. You can always see the sun, day or night. So when you call up that shrink in Beverly Hills--you know the one, Dr. "Everything'll Be Alright"--instead of asking him how much of your time is left, ask him how much of your mind, baby. 'Cause in this life, things are much harder than in the afterworld. In this life, you're on your own.
posted to MetaFilter by kirkaracha at 9:36 AM on September 24, 2008

Ljubljana writes "Ditto Europe and the world. I absolutely don't understand why Europeans are so hostile to Bush and the Republicans when it's clear that Europe has benefitted greatly from the last eight years."

I've got this neighbor. Good guy, though we've had our disagreements over the years. And sure, he and I ran against each other for Sheriff of our little town, and he's won these last 60 years. He's a big guy and tough in a fight,... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by orthogonality at 2:38 AM on September 24, 2008

What is truth?

Are thou the king of the Jews?

Ye have brought this man unto me, as one that perverteth the people; and behold, I, having examined him before you, have found no fault in this man touching those things whereof ye accuse him.

Oh, wait....
posted to MetaFilter by eriko at 7:20 PM on September 18, 2008

I wholeheartedly encourage all Americans, especially Christians, to read the Bible.
posted to MetaFilter by Optimus Chyme at 4:04 PM on September 18, 2008

Also funny how Jesus seemed to have forgotten to tell people not to be gay.

even worse, he was as dangerously negligent when it came to ranting against the evils of abortion: he just didn't, period (or if he did, the gospel writers chose to avoid the subject. they must have all been closet NARAL supporters or something). abortion just wasn't a big deal -- if you actually caused a woman to abort, by beating her or something, you simply had to refund... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by matteo at 5:44 PM on September 18, 2008

As someone who has translated parts of the NT from their original Koine Greek, I will agree that the bible is rarely interpreted as it was originally intended. In fact Christianity as we know it today is vastly different from what it meant to early Christians, pre-Aquinas Christians, Protestant Christians during the reformation, etc. I would go so far as to say even the idea of "God" is completely different than what it meant even several hundred years ago (for a thorough and very... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by geoff. at 5:53 PM on September 18, 2008

I am very not Christian... but the book of Ecclesiastes is beautiful, and is one of my favorite pieces of literature. It's also one of the most nihilistic and dark pieces of writing of which I'm aware. A lot of Christians would have trouble with it... if they read it.
posted to MetaFilter by sonic meat machine at 7:14 PM on September 18, 2008

I'll bet half of them can't sing any of the words to "This Corrosion."
posted to MetaFilter by subbes at 2:31 PM on September 18, 2008

You know, the world really needs an all-female vegan goth-punk band. They could call themselves Soy Division.
posted to MetaFilter by Artw at 3:04 PM on September 18, 2008

I'd rather be an elitist than a cynic.

And not only that (of the two, at least one is genuine and principled!), but I'm also done tacitly letting the "elitist" tag get thrown out there. It's absolutely ridiculous to call people elitist for having the common sense God gave geese. And again, it's a distraction technique. Who are the real elitists? An "elite" is a group of people with some outstanding characteristic -... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Miko at 9:25 PM on September 15, 2008

America is sick of Ivy League theorists spinning their vast and glorious plans by way of the fawning media machine.

Oh, it is to laugh. Let's look at this.

I'm getting a little worrn out on hearing the Ivy League implicated as shorthand for the liberal boogeyman. Firstly, I'm not sure how many people even know what the Ivy League is - it's an athletic conference, made up of only eight schools: Brown, Columbia, Cornell,... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Miko at 11:02 AM on September 16, 2008

I believe in one blog: the Filter, alrighty? Linker of heaven and earth, and of all things fiseable and infiseable....
posted to MetaTalk by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 12:39 PM on September 16, 2008

Eastern Orthodox churches--Greek and Russian especially--are receiving increased interest from well-educated Protestants who are dissatisfied with the intellectual tradition of their native denominations yet unwilling to convert to Catholicism. This is a real trend, but the numbers are still very small.

And an extremely annoying one, speaking as an ethnic Greek Orthodox American. Protestant/Catholic converts to Orthodoxy are much (MUCH) more... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by longdaysjourney at 8:50 AM on September 12, 2008

"Ron Paul has no color! Ron Paul has no cost! Ron Paul rejects your mana-based monetary system!"

A 0-cost colorless card? Ron Paul is an Ornithopter.
posted to MetaFilter by boo_radley at 3:21 PM on September 15, 2008

Factors in the Democrat's favor this year: a disastrous economy, an unpopular war, an incumbent president with a 30% approval rating, far more money and better organization than the other side, a candidate who is charismatic, smart, accomplished and eloquent, an opponent who is old, out of touch, disliked by a large portion of his own party and a Washington insider when people want change.

Factors in the Republican's favor this year: the Democratic candidate is black.... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by ND¢ at 8:31 AM on September 15, 2008

Please pardon the length of this...I've shortened a few different ways, but I'm still left with all of this. I hope also that these words don't someday get used against me, but I guess we'll see....

My experience with suicide led me to conclude long ago that it's usually not about selfishness. While having other people tell me I had to stick around for some important event in their lives made the struggle worse for me, it wasn't because I didn't want... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by batmonkey at 2:55 AM on September 14, 2008

Damn That Television: FOUR MORE YEARS OF REPUBLICANS OUGHTA FIX THIS MESS

Yes, I wish George Bush would just pull his happy little economy-lever and make things right. So sad that his Republican policies that have ruined the economy. Since, as everyone knows, the president has complete and total control over the economy, this is certainly his fault.

It has nothing to do, for example, with Alan Greenspan, who served eight... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by koeselitz at 8:20 PM on September 14, 2008

In many ways the hardcore UFO types very much resemble Creationists. They have their conclusion (its aliens), and therefore any phenomenon which is genuinely unexplained *must* be proof of aliens. Thus: RADAR picks up something strange; normal people think "hmmm, wonder what it might be", they think "ah ha! Its aliens!". Much as the Creationist hears about currently non-understood biological phenomena and thinks "ah ha! Its God!"

In both... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by sotonohito at 6:05 AM on September 15, 2008

Oh my god, really?

Really?

Look, to be fair, I was halfway through a post last night on my own site about how ridiculous I though all the hard-right Freepers/Cornerites/etc. were harping about Palin. She was basically their new Fred Thompson. But I am seriously dumbfounded that they would have been this stupid.

Don’t get me wrong, on a PR level this is masterful for McCain. He’s killed all the... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by XQUZYPHYR at 8:10 AM on August 29, 2008

But the man isn't interested in being a megalomaniac, or owning six Ferraris some lobbyist pays for, or being respected by the media or anyone else in the halls of the powerful. He does his work in the House - a big body it's probably very easy to lose your way in - for the people of Cleveland, and for the rest of us, because he...wants...to.

See, that's the thing about Kucinich (he's my congressman and I love him). He lives not... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by bitter-girl.com at 4:14 PM on September 2, 2008

Jesus H. Christ. You know what I'm sick of?

Let's clear some myths up.

First. There is no "conservative voice" in this thread. Okay. I doubt very much the person(s) in question, who by name call them selves conservative, could articulate what Conservative Political Philosophy is without looking it up. And if they did and had any shred of intellectual honest they would see precious little of that philosophy at work in the Bush... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by tkchrist at 8:42 PM on September 6, 2008

Look, no matter who grabs the brass ring in November, the world won't come to an end. I have lived too long and seen too many elections and survived too many Presidents of varying calibers...we will be all right.

Your comment made me cry .... Because, you see, I don't think we will be. Here, in my own life, I don't think we will be. We just can't stand four (or eight) more years of this.

Between the two of us, my husband and... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by anastasiav at 10:14 PM on September 9, 2008

RUN A HOME LIKE A BUSINESS

Weekly Home Meeting Minutes 9/7/08

Attendees:
- Steve
- Linda
- Susie
- Billy

Key Items Addressed:

- Billy insisted that the technical issues that prevented him from taking out the garbage would soon be resolved.

- Linda presented a PowerPoint presentation entitled... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by burnmp3s at 8:35 AM on September 11, 2008

$ telnet barackobama.com 443
Trying 66.39.143.229...
Connected to barackobama.com.
Escape character is '^]'.
Connection closed by foreign host.
$ telnet johnmccain.com 443
Trying 64.203.107.149...
Connected to johnmccain.com.
Escape character is '^]'.
Connection closed by a real American.
$ _


Need I say more.
posted to MetaFilter by Combustible Edison Lighthouse at 6:16 PM on September 9, 2008

But it is my impression that heroin and meth are basically a one-way ticket to addiction, and are not something you really use recreationally after the first or second experience.

The thing is, the only people who really show up are the people who do have dependency issues. I seem to recall reading a paper on cocaine use which divided users into four categories:

1. Occasional users. These people use cocaine occasionally. They... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by xchmp at 11:49 PM on September 8, 2008

Godseyeview, please post more, your prose has the same pleasurable effect on my brain as a Hefty sack full of embalming fluid soaked rags.

Socialism is the destruction of the individual.

And what is the other side of that coin? The individual is God?

The flip side is Libertarianism is the Manifestation of the individual.

How do you know what my... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by godseyeview at 9:55 PM on September 7, 2008

Nice blog, if you happen to like disposable pens or expensive refills.


It would have been nice to see mention of an entry level fountain pen, or even a nice one. Or a brief essay on their lifesaving abilities.
posted to MetaFilter by b1tr0t at 8:54 PM on September 4, 2008

MYOB.
posted to Ask Metafilter by rhizome at 12:12 PM on September 4, 2008

Is there a difference between "discover your passion" and "discover what you want to do"?

I ask because I hear people talk about their Passion (with a capital P), as if everyone has one whether they know it or not. As it it's a special glowing ball inside each of us. Yet I see no evidence that this ball necessarily exists.

To me, it's more likely that we have things we like and things we dislike. A like becomes a passion when... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by grumblebee at 12:22 PM on September 4, 2008

Conan the Barbarian is an endlessly rewatchable classic. Glorious dreamlike excess from the days when people still built ridiculously ornate sets, a great turn from James Earl Jones, and thanks to the context, even Arnold is convincing. A thunderous brassy score, stridently crypto-fascist politics, and that one dude with the long hair and RIDICULOUS hammer - it´s really got everything. Anyone who can recite Mako´s opening monologue (¨Between the time when the oceans drank Atlantis...... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by nicolas léonard sadi carnot at 11:29 AM on September 3, 2008

These are not science questions, these are policy questions.

What I want is for the candidates to answer questions like these:

Basic Science Exam for Presidential Candidates

1. Which of the following is a greenhouse gas that contributes to global warming?
a) oxygen
b) methane
c) nitrogen
d) argon

2. Which kind of fat is widely... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by humannaire at 9:34 PM on September 1, 2008

I'll buy the movie rights to vi, if any of you people out there want to sell it.
90% of viewers would never figure out how to leave the theatre.
posted to MetaFilter by Wolfdog at 2:40 PM on August 30, 2008

Seems the general consensus is that you should at least add a brief explanation to back up your reasoning for "No." You know, something like:

She wasn't 26, she was 19, but with legs like that it was hard to tell, I have to be honest. We met in this squalid little dive bar outside of Fort Worth, on her insistence. It was attached to a gas station and the only building within 20 miles, as far as I could tell. It even had those real swinging saloon doors on the... [more]
posted to MetaTalk by allkindsoftime at 8:46 AM on August 29, 2008

It was an amazing thing..

I am at work, going about my normal business. A very busy sports night at a bar that puts the Huey Lewis into Sports, with games on nearly every television.. Only one television, stuck in a corner with no volume, was the Democratic National Convention airing, unfiltered footage from C-SPAN. There was a couple people looking at it, no one really paying much attention.. But when Obama came to the stage, a few people started reading the Closed... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by mediocre at 10:40 PM on August 28, 2008

Wow ... wonderful to find another freak here ... you'd be surprised how few people have even heard of NeoPlatonism, let alone have read the Enneads. (And in case anyone's interested, by far the best version - again, IMO - is the Stephen MacKenna translation).

Midas and all: the full text of Stephen Mackenna's translation of Plotinus's Enneads is online.
posted to MetaFilter by MiguelCardoso at 9:16 PM on December 2, 2002

hmmm. Been thinking about this thread all day. Was at work and couldn't write. I'm a non-theist/atheist, who respects the methodolgy of science. Don't like group religion of any kind.

Comments in this thread prompted me to think about the nature of knowledge, of knowing, the dance of science with attempting to know the unknown with what is already known.

I agree Science is the best tool out there for understanding the Universe we live... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by nickyskye at 7:10 PM on August 27, 2008

The thing about this blog is that it neglects the whole "Obama" phenomenon. How will this affect my taxes?

I know this is supposed to be a website for grownups, but I can see you there. Yeah, you. You know I'm talking to you. I'm on to you, kid. I know your dad walked away from the monitor for a sec to go polish his Ajax or tweak some CSS, and you thought you might get a quick look at some pictures of frogs having sex or something. It's all right, though,... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Greg Nog at 10:44 AM on August 26, 2008