Five days away from the ones you love is far too long. Hello, everyone from the wasteland that was, until recently, my beautiful home. Despite what you’re NOT reading in the news, Louisiana is far from “okay.” Yes, New Orleans dodged another cannonball, but tonight, over one million Louisiana residents are sleeping for a fifth night with no electricity.

Today, the smart ones cleaned out their fridge and threw away hundreds of dollars of unfrozen and room temperature... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by ColdChef at 8:30 PM on September 4, 2008

Is there a difference between "discover your passion" and "discover what you want to do"?

I ask because I hear people talk about their Passion (with a capital P), as if everyone has one whether they know it or not. As it it's a special glowing ball inside each of us. Yet I see no evidence that this ball necessarily exists.

To me, it's more likely that we have things we like and things we dislike. A like becomes a passion when... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by grumblebee at 12:22 PM on September 4, 2008

I'm the OP in the AskMe thread. I've gotten some great responses over there and they're truly appreciated. As for this issue??? Welll, to each his own I suppose - but for the record:

I was 'out' to my friends while in the military. It was a non-issue to them.

Apparently I was in a much different situation than Teach the Dead, since I never experienced any homophobia. Even when there would be talk about OTHER people that everyone thought was... [more]
posted to MetaTalk by matty at 9:37 AM on September 5, 2008

I don't think there are any set topics of conversation which make women think "Hmm, I'll be friends with this guy but not sleep with him."

Revealing that you believe in the Ladder Theory, or any other weird how-to-get-laid pseudopsychology, might make women think "Hmm, I don't want to be friends with this guy or sleep with him."
posted to Ask Metafilter by Metroid Baby at 8:22 AM on September 5, 2008

The word resentment comes from the Latin word "sentire" which means, "to feel", and when you put "re" in front of any word, it means "again", so the word resent means "to feel again". It includes people, institutions or principles with whom we were angry, with whom we were hurt or threatened or interfered with, with whom we felt had wronged us, with whom we stayed sore at, with whom we felt "burned up" toward, and with whom we held a... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by netbros at 4:21 PM on September 4, 2008

MYOB.
posted to Ask Metafilter by rhizome at 12:12 PM on September 4, 2008

Your son's inner convictions are no match for a randy young co-ed offering up her body

Ick ick ick ick ick ick.

You don't know this poster's son, and neither do I.

Also, "randy young co-ed offering up her body?" How are you getting Internet access from 1928?
posted to Ask Metafilter by Sidhedevil at 12:16 PM on September 4, 2008

Depends -- do they want to actually lay a smackdown on their neighbors, or just get them to stop sending the chain-email? I don't have any suggestions for the talking-points approach, but if they just want the neighbors to back off, maybe doing something that I did would get the message across without engaging them:

I had a family member who would include me on her email list for chain emails for things like "security alerts for women", "Chicken soup for... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by EmpressCallipygos at 11:25 AM on September 4, 2008

It's always something. Well, not really, but it's FREQUENTLY something. You need to make your own judgment call as to whether his strengths, relative to others, outweigh his weaknesses. Though they involve emissions, sometimes premature ones, relationships aren't like an emissions test, in which your car has to pass a checklist of minimum or maximum thresholds, and once all the boxes are checked it's a keeper; they're more like a road test, in which ease of handling might matter more than... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Clyde Mnestra at 2:37 PM on September 3, 2008

Are you looking to teach her gratitude, or empathy? What your younger daughter is doing sounds like empathy - it comes from a place of feeling and caring about what other people feel.

I reacted to your question, even before the [more inside] - the caps, and then later the bold, and the "that head of hers". You probably wrote this question in frustration and anger, and parenting is often enormously frustrating, so I don't mean to seem harsh... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Ira_ at 5:39 AM on September 3, 2008

Nthing keeping a diary of your spending, preferably electronic. A couple of years ago I was scratching my head wondering where my paycheck was going so I started using my debit card for every purchase (i.e. no cash). I then downloaded my checking account history into Microsoft Money and I was absolutely shocked at the amount of money I wasted at places like BJ's (similar to Costo or Sam's) and on things like clothing. Gas was another big shocker at almost $500 a month. I never tracked it because... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by bda1972 at 10:28 PM on September 1, 2008

This is gonna sound a little weird, but I'm absolutely convinced its true: old people.

Try at your local nursing home, or Denny's, or even homeless shelter. There's a lot of old folks out there, its just that we don't see as much of them as one would expect because we've become so adept as a society at pushing them to the lesser-seen margins of our lifestyle.

Although I never knew it at the time, one thing my parents got right in raising me and... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by allkindsoftime at 7:05 AM on August 30, 2008

"a fever" is a great reason to stay home, because "a fever" means you are either communicable or your body is trying desperately to stave off worse illness.

If a person is going to get better from even a minor illness, rest is part of the cure and employers should quit being such fascists about such things. People get ill. It happens. Unless it's part of a larger performance issue, there's no reason other than petty control issues and poor workforce... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by batmonkey at 7:17 PM on August 29, 2008

"I can't change him but what can I do to change myself or my actions to make this a better situation?"

Ask yourself - why isn't he asking this question of himself?
posted to Ask Metafilter by TorontoSandy at 6:39 PM on August 28, 2008

This is not an ethical question. Writers use pseudonyms all the time, often for exactly that reason. Just explain to your agent and/or publisher (as applicable) what you want to do; they can help with the details more than we can.
posted to Ask Metafilter by languagehat at 11:23 AM on August 28, 2008

"What does your husband do?" they ask.
"Anything I tell him to," you smile knowingly.
"No," they insist, "Really."
"No," you say, "Really. The trick is to train them early. I even got him to support us while I went back to school!"

If they keep pressing, then you can follow up how it's your turn to support him while he gets over a medical issue.
posted to Ask Metafilter by robocop is bleeding at 11:11 AM on August 28, 2008

Say exactly what you say here--"I find it frustrating when people judge the most important person in my life for trying to recover from a very difficult illness. Frankly, I know I will never be able to repay him for all he's done for me and everytime he's supported me, but I think giving him a chance to get better while I carry the load for once is the least I could do."

This will shut them up pronto. You can expect the issue will never, ever be brought up again.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Ironmouth at 12:38 PM on August 28, 2008

Cue people as to how YOU feel about the situation:

"It's a sad story, but he developed a health condition that's made working difficult, fortunately though it's given him the chance to go back to school, which we are both really happy about.

If pressed about what he did exactly, I might say "he's an incredibly hard worker. He's been a truck driver, a... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by xammerboy at 1:49 PM on August 28, 2008

It is how you say it, not what you say. My husband is starting the first day of his parental leave today and I am going back to work. Anyone who asks about our arrangements gets my enthusiastic "I can't wait to go back to work! I HATE house cleaning!", with more or less detail depending on their interest. My husband worked part-time for years due to a chronic illness so I know about stranger's assumptions. If they know how you feel about your choices then there is no opening for... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by saucysault at 3:13 PM on August 28, 2008

People naturalizing are already required to demonstrate knowledge of English (except for the very old).

Proposed amendments never address that. What they do is make English the OFFICIAL LANGUAGE!!! Doing so has the following benefits:

(1) It helps you kick out icky brown people whose cooking smells funny.
(2) It gives you a reason to feel superior to some icky brown people whose cooking smells funny.
(3) It... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by ROU_Xenophobe at 8:49 AM on August 28, 2008

2. Emergency services are for citizens. I don't expect to go to other countries, walk into emergency rooms, and demand that I be given medical treatment in english. This would be ridiculous in most countries.

So if you're touristing about in Paris, Rome, Bangkok, or Rio and you come down with a mysterious rash/get bitten by something poisonous/your appendix ruptures/you cough blood and get diagnosed with TB and quarantined, you'd be totally fine with... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by rtha at 10:53 AM on August 28, 2008

The thing about this blog is that it neglects the whole "Obama" phenomenon. How will this affect my taxes?

I know this is supposed to be a website for grownups, but I can see you there. Yeah, you. You know I'm talking to you. I'm on to you, kid. I know your dad walked away from the monitor for a sec to go polish his Ajax or tweak some CSS, and you thought you might get a quick look at some pictures of frogs having sex or something. It's all right, though,... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Greg Nog at 10:44 AM on August 26, 2008

However. Brownies are just chunks of baked dough if they're not iced.

I think you are hopelessly confused about what a brownie is. First and foremost, brownies are baked from a batter, not a dough. But furthermore, they require no icing at all, because the best recipes lead to a flaky top above a fluffy bottom. It's two different layers naturally, and icing is just the nastiest thing you can do to a brownie.
posted to MetaFilter by explosion at 11:23 AM on August 26, 2008

I change my dog's name every 3 months just to be on the safe side; yet ironically, that just seems to make my dog increasingly insecure.
posted to MetaFilter by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 12:46 PM on August 26, 2008

"Sorry, I'm ineligible to donate."
posted to Ask Metafilter by bunji at 12:23 AM on August 26, 2008

Just tell them you're ineligible, its not a lie but it doesn't reveal any private information. You don't need to tell them any more than that.
posted to Ask Metafilter by missmagenta at 1:04 AM on August 26, 2008

A simple "I'd love to, but I'm not eligible. Thanks for asking though!" ought to cover it. No need to delve any further than that. There are tons of reasons you might not be eligible, including not having enough to eat or drink earlier in the day, so you can always fall back on that if you're talking to a particularly Nosy Nelly.
posted to Ask Metafilter by platinum at 1:18 AM on August 26, 2008

You should speak to the blood bank that runs your workplace blood drives. Blood banks understand that it is inappropriate to try to persuade or pester someone into giving blood. In fact, the last time I gave blood, I was taken along afterwards into a private room and handed two barcodes. I was to stick one on the consent form. One was for "yes, use this unit of blood that I just gave." The other was "No, I don't want this blood used. I was guilted or peer-pressured or... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by ikkyu2 at 1:01 AM on August 26, 2008

You need to be more pushy. Do your best to force them into a concrete answer.

You: "Can you get to it this week?"
Them: "Umm, I don't think so, blah blah blah..."
You: "Next week?"
Them: "Umm, maybe..."
You: "I'd like to make specific arrangements, can you check your calendar and get back to me by the end of the day?"
Them: "Uhhh, ok, I'll... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by mpls2 at 4:42 PM on August 24, 2008

I make an appointment with the person. My old landlord would try to get out of fixing our front door (it no longer stayed locked, very dangerous!). My roomies would take his "oh, I forgot" excuses -- I told him "ok, so can you come by on Sunday at 11?". Tell the wedding photographer that you'll be at his studio on Monday at 12 to pick up your pictures. Tell your landlord that you'll be home on Wednesday night and expect him to come and fix it then. Demand what you're... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by OLechat at 4:45 PM on August 24, 2008

Always give people concrete deadlines. If they miss the first one, don't dwell on it but give them another concrete deadline.

When it's three months later and they still haven't done what they've promised, you can say "Hey, I asked you to have this done April 20th, and you missed it. Then I gave you an extension until May 1st, and you missed that one too. You missed my June 1st deadline as well. What's the deal?"

The reason that this... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Ostara at 5:16 PM on August 24, 2008

This isn't a geek issue. The problem is not that he's hyper-rational and it makes him angry; the problem is that he's angry and that he justifies it with this I'm-just-so-damn-rational narcissism nonsense.
posted to Ask Metafilter by LittleMissCranky at 4:44 PM on August 24, 2008

Douchebags do incredibly douchey thing. Film at 11.
posted to MetaFilter by dirtynumbangelboy at 8:19 AM on August 22, 2008

Should've pleaded insanity. One of them was stung by a spelling bee at an early age.
posted to MetaFilter by jamjam at 8:44 AM on August 22, 2008

I'm going to have a plate of beans tomorrow. But I'm not sure what kind exactly. Black beans? Kidney beans? I might have a hot date -- will all these options give me embarrassing gas? Are there ways to reduce gas from eating beans? Do those little "beano" pills upset any natural processes? Should I become a vegan? If I'm going vegan, should I also do raw food only? Don't plants have feelings? Have you ever seen an artichoke plant in the wild? Why would someone want to eat one? And what... [more]
posted to MetaTalk by mathowie at 3:05 PM on August 22, 2008

Take a grocery bag, put your hand in it, grab the dead animal through the bag, then turn the bag inside out so that the animal is inside the bag; this way you don't have to touch the animal. If the thought of feeling the animal through the bag upsets you, put on a thick glove first, so it's further removed. Failing that, ask a neighbour if they'd mind doing it. Then just dump the animal in the trash; think of it as being really not much different from a chicken carcass. Treat it as an exercise... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by le morte de bea arthur at 3:07 PM on August 8, 2008

Various: Speech, Bilbo... Speech, speech!

Bilbo: My dear Freddy Macs and IndyMacs, Fanny Maes and Lehmans, Countrywides, First Franklins, Chases, Trumps, and Bear Steens...

Ralph R. Cioffi: Bear STEARNS!

Bilbo: Today is my one-hundred and eleventieth installment.

Various: Happy Payday!

Bilbo: Alas eleventy-one installments is far too short a time to repay such... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by anthill at 5:26 AM on August 5, 2008

Maybe it's been forgotten that the point of a wedding is to celebrate the couple.

Don't like the couple? Don't go to the wedding.

Further, have you stopped to consider that maybe the fact that they have everything is the reason the registry gifts are high-priced and "useless"? What sense does it make for them ask for things they already have?

Get them a gift or don't, but either way, get over yourself.
posted to Ask Metafilter by toomuchpete at 5:13 AM on August 5, 2008

I find it interesting how bisexuality tends to really piss off certain gay people.

This is true enough, it's not an easy issue for gay OR straight people, especially along the generational divide. But one aspect of it that almost everyone hates is the preponderance of vapid straight girls begging for attention by making out with each other for the viewing pleasure of vapid straight males. Which this new song pretty much channels the essence of.
posted to MetaFilter by [NOT HERMITOSIS-IST] at 5:58 PM on August 2, 2008

the song describes her making out with a girl for her own pleasure

That's not really true. Though she says "I kissed a girl just to try it/
I hope my boyfriend don't mind it..." she all but winks at the camera to signify that she knows he won't mind at all. And the rest indicates a conflict as well:

"No, I don't even know your name
It doesn't... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by [NOT HERMITOSIS-IST] at 6:19 PM on August 2, 2008

I dunno. I say this all as someone who identifies as a big ol' dyke, but this is complicated.

On one hand, the song (and its video, which is even worse) drives me absolutely frigging nuts. Most gay people tend to view their sexuality as part of their identity, and while some can be hostile towards bi people (as said above), I'm not one of them. Then strolls along a bunch of people--almost always female--who make out with other girls in clubs for the express benefit of... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by flibbertigibbet at 9:49 PM on August 2, 2008

an alarming number of otherwise calm and decent people turn into assholes when they enter a restaurant. i own a restaurant and buy basic food ingredients from sysco and use them in original dishes of my own. i have a profitable and reputable business that has drawn praise from customers and food writers from several publications. without a supplier as dependable and consistent as sysco, time i devote to prep and cooking would be wasted dealing with multiple vendors. my advice is patronize... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by kitchenrat at 6:20 AM on July 31, 2008

an alarming number of otherwise calm and decent people turn into assholes when they enter a restaurant.

Having worked in restaurants both in the kitchen and as a waiter, this statement rings very true. People go to restaurants to be served. Many customers are pleasant people who are easy to deal with. However, within a distinct minority of restaurant patrons, it's almost as if a wave of entitlement takes over. Since they're footing the bill, the... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by inqb8tr at 11:39 AM on July 31, 2008

I'm a gay dude and have been married to my husband for six years.

Man, take a breath. First, it sounds like your partner is nervous about satisfying you. His lack of experience is compounding this and accounts for his lack of confidence. It's up to you to make him feel confident and after such a long time it'll be tricky. A good start would be to close the open relationship for now -- if you really want to give this a go. Personally, I'll disagree with Cool Papa on... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Craig at 5:43 PM on July 30, 2008

Dunno that Ford and GM need bailouts. Last I checked, Ford and GM were posting profits... just not in their US operations. Or at worst, reasonable losses. Anyway, Ford and GM are far larger than just their US branches.

It's also the case that their path to profitability in the US is actually pretty clear -- stop refusing to sell Euro models, which don't suck ass, in the US. Their management is just too fucking dumb, or too perversely incented, to do the hugely fucking obvious.
posted to Ask Metafilter by ROU_Xenophobe at 7:36 AM on July 25, 2008

I think things are looking pretty good for US automakers right now. Their balance sheets are terrible - GM took a $68 billion quarterly writedown a couple quarters ago, and I don't care what you call an accounting change, $68B is $68B - but they have a number of tailwinds.

The unions are gutted shells of their former selves; for example, the recent American Axle strike caused GM not to make 100,000 trucks that they would never have sold anyway, so management was happy... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by ikkyu2 at 10:26 AM on July 25, 2008 marked best answer

I always thought the "speak now or forever hold your peace" was more of an admonishment to friends and relatives in attendance, meaning "If you think something is wrong with this marriage, say it now or never say it in the future."

e.g. If Aunt Gertie thinks your new hubby is a dick, she can say it now at the wedding ("speak now"), but if she chooses not to say anything then she relinquishes her right to ever complain... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by amyms at 4:29 PM on July 24, 2008

He doesn't have to love the dog. He doesn't even have to like the dog.

But he does have to love/like YOU enough to make an effort to be nice about it. And being nice doesn't mean tolerating the dog, but arguing that he's right. Being nice about it means agreeing that because it's important to YOU, then it's important enough to HIM to respect your feelings.

It basically boils down to respecting your feelings *because you've asked him to*, and... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by wayward vagabond at 12:50 PM on July 22, 2008

If dogs are as important to you as they are to me and my wife, I cannot fathom why you are even giving this guy enough of a chance to write an AskMe question about him. He does not sound salvageable as a mate.

I know that there are people like him, and I am not saying he is a "bad person" in any universal, objective sense. But he is a bad person for a relationship with a dog lover. Furthermore, he lacks empathy in failing to understand why dogs are so... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jayder at 2:10 PM on July 22, 2008

A nice man, upon seeing that you love something (regardless of what it is--80s metal, dollhouse miniatures, roller derby, your dog), will take a kindly interest in it solely because you love it. He may not love it himself, but he will try to understand what you love about it and make you feel supported in your love of it, because he cares about you. This man is not nice. DTMFA.

Also, to those trying to establish a hierarchy of creatures worthy of love (1. Children . . .... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by HotToddy at 2:46 PM on July 22, 2008