Hmm.. do you have a Paypal account? I'll chip in some money for supplies. We could have a MeFi sponsored classroom.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Ugh at 8:16 AM on September 1, 2008

Listen to this episode of This American Life, and pay close attention to the guy who decides to write down all the jokes he normally would have said out loud(second act, MIT Puzzlers). I don't know if this would help you. I think i have the same problem sometimes...i just can't stop making the jokes.
posted to Ask Metafilter by schyler523 at 9:13 AM on August 8, 2008

I'll never forget the day gay marriage was legalized here in British Columbia. I remember looking into my wife's eyes, trying to wrap my head around the fact that we couldn't be married anymore. I couldn't look away from the pain those eyes, the sense that I'd let her down, that all the promises we made weren't worth a hill of beans now because the gays had destroyed marriage. And democracy. That was important to us to, what with the stolen elections and the illegal surveillance and the... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Naberius at 11:36 PM on July 29, 2008

I guess Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus! LOL!

The problem is that the women quoted in the article, who are quite obviously insufferable hens, confuse men's conversation filters with being boring. But these women would never want to have the conversation that would ensue if men simply said what was on their minds. For example:

F: My God, you're so boring!

M: What?

F: Boring! You... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Pastabagel at 8:21 AM on June 19, 2008

I love this idea. I too wondered why they never made lightweight foam (or Nerf) cars and took an elaborate (but inexpensive) bumper-car concept and applied it to daily travel.

There's no logical reason to continue to use extremely thin, expensive, painted sheet metal as the skin or shells for cars. Frankly, you drivers and car owners really need to get over having shiny, curvy cars where the styling is the main selling point. It's a sick, destructive fetish at this point,... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by loquacious at 5:20 PM on June 5, 2008

Their actual coffee is about as good as Denny's.

Eh, as much as I loathe what Starbucks does to perfectly good coffee beans, I can't agree with this.

Denny's coffee tastes like they use bleached ground coffee that's been left to toast on the tarpaper roof of a strip mall for several years before being brewed and filtered in dusty, dirty old straw baskets bought in bulk from thrift stores. It tastes what I could only imagine... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by loquacious at 5:55 PM on July 18, 2008

PS - a friend is doing laser right now, and having pretty good results. *If* he is interested in doing laser, make sure he is in the class of individuals it works on (dark hair and pale skin works best - blonds and redheads usually find laser ineffectual) and make sure he does a lot of research on which laser he thinks will work best for him.

Most of the cheap-o places use IPL 'lasers'- which aren't even lasers! IPL, or Intense Pulse Light is used by many of the chain... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by arnicae at 12:11 PM on July 8, 2008

A small approach I like, but not necessarily for everyone: every now and then--not necessarily in a professional context, of course--intentionally do something stupid in front of somebody...like push the wrong button on an elevator and then have to push another one, or get off on the wrong floor and have to get back on...or unzip your fly such that someone has to tell you...or leave your shirt tag sticking out...or act like you recognize someone and call them by the wrong name...or give a... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by troybob at 2:30 PM on July 4, 2008

There's a Target at the Queens Center Mall in queens, and another in Brooklyn.

The closest one to the Upper West Side is likely the one in the Bronx, at 225th Street (take the 1 there and walk two blocks east).
posted to Ask Metafilter by oaf at 5:11 AM on June 9, 2008

Lots of answers already on the more philosophical aspects, so I'll talk a little bit to the practical (sorry, it's long):

- it's fantastic that you already have an apartment, bc that tends to be one of the biggest culture-shock moments for new NYers (cost, size, quality, bugginess, location etc). Invest in a window AC. It's like 96 degrees here right now and the humidity is killer.

-Furniture: While Craiglist is great for a lot of secondhand... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by alleycat01 at 5:23 PM on June 8, 2008

Many of my students live in Brooklyn and get to Morningside Heights on the 2/3 to the 12 in 30 -45 minutes, depending on time of day; I get there from the w village in 20-25 minutes

But if you live off the 1 or the B/C and you're coming from the east side, it can take 45 minutes. Learn to love the D train to 59th St/Columbus Circle. That's what I did when I lived uptown. But learn to control your rage when the C that you've been waiting 20 minutes for... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by kathryn at 8:12 AM on June 6, 2008

I've lived in Inwood or Washington Heights for 7 years now and I'm still amazed at how lazy some people in this city can be. The poster above who told you to move to Brooklyn because people won't come to the Upper West Side? They are obviously not FROM NYC, or else they wouldn't care about getting on the subway for the 20-30 minutes it would take to reach you. Besides, if you're moving to the Upper West Side, chances are you don't WANT to hang out with spoiled brat hipsters and burnt out... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by ChickenringNYC at 8:02 AM on June 6, 2008

I don't personally have any morals at all. If it proves convenient to kill fetuses, infants, children, adults, etc.--well, I just don't care.

That is so sexy. Oh, man. Somebody go fetch me a second blouse; I've just torn off the one I was wearing. If only you were over 18...!!1!?!
posted to MetaFilter by katillathehun at 11:13 PM on June 6, 2008

I've gotten better at not talking about my feelings too much, though... which is probably part and parcel with the problem of not feeling comfortable, but it keeps me from causing unnecessary problems for anyone else.

You sound like you may be a little anxious and catastrophizing things somewhat. I felt like this all the time when I lived in Seattle. I had a group of friends that I liked and I did things that I enjoyed and it was really a great place... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jessamyn at 9:16 PM on June 5, 2008

Every man and woman is individually responsible for their own sexual revolution, as well as the consequences that spring from it. That's supposed to be liberating, not discouraging.

It depresses me beyond words to discuss monogamy with my friends, because most of them see it as all-or-nothing. They have curiosities, desires, and frustrations that are constantly quashed by their concept of what "is done" and what "is not done", as if it's anyone... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by [NOT HERMITOSIS-IST] at 9:07 AM on May 20, 2008

The really important part of your question that has been (purposefully?) left out is the price you'd like to pay. This is probably the single biggest determining factor to getting a place in NYC.

You can live in the city for about $1700'mo. By "in the city" I mean Manhattan proper. Subtract a couple hundred if you don't mind living in Brooklyn, subtract another couple hundred for Queens.

The key, the single crucial element to getting... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Civil_Disobedient at 8:41 AM on May 8, 2004

When I popped in before to give the cartoon link, I should have included this CivilDisobedient post about SHIT YOU SHOULD HAVE TOGETHER when looking for apartments. I have sent this link to every one of my out-of-town friends considering moving here, since apparently this is not the norm in other cities? I wouldn't say you need all of this stuff for every apartment, but some combination of these elements is usually required.

I live... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by lalex at 8:48 PM on May 20, 2008

Disclaimers:
Although I am a former manager at one of the nation's formerly largest toxicology (specifically drug-testing) laboratories, I am not your former manager of a toxicology laboratory, and this is not drug-testing advice. Heh.

First, ignore anything a headshop tells you. They are like astrologers, gleaning information from barely perceived or anecdotal evidence. Ignore everything almost everyone tells you, unless they work in the industry.... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by nedpwolf at 3:39 PM on May 5, 2008 marked best answer

Poor groom. Amy will be insufferable after this.

She's already a vegan theater dork, how much more insufferable could a person get?
posted to MetaFilter by padraigin at 4:17 PM on May 4, 2008

socialism for the very wealthy and capitalism for the rest of us.

From each, in inverse proportion to his ability; to each, in inverse proportion to his needs.
posted to MetaFilter by PeterMcDermott at 4:26 AM on March 17, 2008

I've haven't been yet, but when I saw photographs of Patagonia I couldn't believe the place was real.
posted to Ask Metafilter by inactivist at 12:43 PM on April 29, 2008

The thing about the West LA is scene is...it doesnt exist. The venues are too far apart and not cool enough. That being said...I'm in a band based on the Westside. We are from the Santa Monica/Venice area.

We are called Other People. Please download our first album for free on our blog:

http://hearingotherpeople.com


(indie rock, radiohead, modest mouse, arcade fire, etc, etc)
posted to Ask Metafilter by Charlie Lesoine at 11:15 AM on April 24, 2008

When I was about five my older sister woke me up one night from the top bunk and told me to look outside. So I did, and out through the gap between the curtains I saw in the moonlight my mother laid out crooked over the brick-lined flowerbed, my father still standing over her with his fists balled. In the morning she was gone and I cried and cried, certain she'd never be back. She was in the hospital with a broken collarbone; she developed pneumonia and stayed away until she gave birth to my... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Tuwa at 11:18 PM on February 26, 2005

Atrium was really good for my room-mate and placed her at a job that hired her full time after three months. I worked through RemX staffing for a while and found the people there pleasant and available.
posted to Ask Metafilter by thankyoujohnnyfever at 9:22 PM on January 3, 2008

"...5-10 a day is normal for completed signups around here"

So $25-50 a day supports mathowie, cortex, and jessamyn.

Clearly we need some help here. Is Sally Struthers available?
posted to MetaTalk by mr_crash_davis at 4:15 PM on April 13, 2008

One of my favorite things about NYC is that all kinds of people are there. Lots of folks were born there, but lots came from elsewhere, and brought themselves with them. That's part of what NYC is and you are part of that no matter where you're from or why you're there, which I always enjoyed.

The things that made me think "tourist" on the street: overweight, slow moving, slow talking, shabbily dressed (no one but tourists wears beat up old sneakers in New... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by ikkyu2 at 4:33 PM on July 26, 2007 marked best answer

Yeah, but there's nothing in my tags about my laterally curved penis? Oh.




Kidding!
posted to MetaTalk by waraw at 11:41 AM on April 2, 2008

In the same way that wallowing in a cesspool is like a PhD program in microbiology.
posted to MetaTalk by Wolfdog at 9:00 AM on March 23, 2008

I used Google Sketchup to model my new place. If you're buying any mass-market furniture (IKEA etc) chances are someone will have built a 3D model of it. You can plug your dimensions in and generate a pretty good virtual space to move your furnuture around in. Saves a lot of time.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Happy Dave at 2:06 AM on March 4, 2008 marked best answer

If you need to buy a book to teach yourself how to be an asshole, you will never be an asshole. You'll just be a passive-aggressive wiener, and a rube to boot.
posted to MetaFilter by Alvy Ampersand at 7:45 PM on March 15, 2008

Dr. Leonard Sax: asshat pseudoscience. Why are people so willing to believe crackpot claims about sex differences?
posted to MetaFilter by cogneuro at 10:53 AM on February 29, 2008

I'm not Christian, but I am fascinated by religion in general, and as much as I have disagreed with konolia on plenty points in the past, I think that the negative and intolerant attitude toward ALL religions really lowers the discourse here. The acid with which people choose to respond to anything that relates to religion never fails to disturb me, because it's obvious how much baggage people bring into those threads with them, causing them to behave very disrespectfully. It's boring,... [more]
posted to MetaTalk by hermitosis at 1:26 PM on February 17, 2008

http://wakerupper.com/
posted to Ask Metafilter by nitsuj at 12:29 PM on February 16, 2008 marked best answer

First, be smart from the very beginning. Pulverize all teeth, burn off fingerprints, and disfigure the face. Forcing a DNA test to establish identity (if it ever comes to that) might introduce the legal/forensic hurdle that saves your ass down the line. An unidentifiable body can, in a pinch, be dressed in thrift store clothes and dropped in a bad part of town where the police are less likely to question it. I don't reommend that disposal method, I'm just saying an easily identifiable body is an... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by scarabic at 6:27 PM on June 13, 2004 marked best answer

http://graphics8.nytimes.com/images/2008/02/04/us/04obama-337.jpg

Should have previewed.

Also, http://graphics8.nytimes.com/images/2008/02/04/us/04obama-600.jpg
posted to Ask Metafilter by explosion at 1:39 PM on February 4, 2008

It's called "AskMetaFilter," not "play games with MetaFilter where you ask a question of the community but then mark your own contribution as the best one."

This only matters if you're playing for a score. "Dammit, he marked his own answer best, he can't do that, it's not fair!"

It's only not fair if you're trying to win. AskMe isn't about winning, it's about helping people. You can help them... [more]
posted to MetaTalk by Malor at 11:44 AM on January 15, 2008

It doesn't sound so great, to be honest.

I teach English abroad. 6 days sounds incredibly short for any sort of practical and theoretical course, the name "Oxford" throws up all sorts of red flags (why do they need the cache of being associated with a reputable institution if they aren't reputable on their own?), and you yourself call it a business.

Who assesses the quality of their program? Can she complain about poor quality to a... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by mdonley at 9:01 AM on August 18, 2006 marked best answer

Is it the quality of the post or because you are a bunch of cunts?

A priest decides to take a walk to the pier near his church. He looks around and finally stops to watch a fisherman load his boat. The fisherman notices, and asks the priest if he would like to join him for a couple of hours. The priest agrees. The fisherman asks if the priest has ever fished before, to which the priest says "no". He baits the hook for him and says,... [more]
posted to MetaTalk by kosem at 9:02 AM on July 11, 2007

I'm struggling at the moment with the idea of having kids with my girlfriend, because I wonder what world we would bring them into, or how we would support them.

Sometimes I think that too then I recall that I make over 10 times what my parents made when they had me. They were so broke at various points...that, well, I could tell you stories. And yet I had a fantastic, wonderful almost idyllic childhood. Whether someone had a great childhood had more... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by vacapinta at 7:59 PM on April 14, 2007

Become an atheist!

I'm an atheist and I am positive that Jesus existed. I have seen many documentaries and read many books (including the Bible) which have led me to believe that. But to be clear, I am an atheist who believes that there was a person who inspired Christianity named Jesus, but much like you, I don't believe he was capable of performing the miracles he was said to have performed. I think at best he was a a fantastic con artist who performed some great magic... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Effigy2000 at 11:23 PM on April 7, 2007 marked best answer