Favorites from melissa
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Working Parents Who Hate To Cook: what should be on our list of easy family dinners?
I've recently moved into a role that's supposed to be 50% project management/client relations and 50% project work (from a role that was basically just an individual contributor). The project management side of things is going well, but I'm finding it hard to carve out the time and space for actual project work. Does anyone have tips for wearing multiple hats and still being effective in diverse aspects of a job?
I'm looking for perspective on how bad or good of an idea it is to quit my current job without another job lined up.
We currently pay $450/month for afterschool care for our two boys, 7 and 10. They mostly color or play boardgames in the cafeteria, and they like it OK. We can afford this, though of course it would be nice to have that money freed up for savings or family trips. We already let the kids walk to and from school together (about a 20-minute walk). If we were to stop using afterschool care, the kids would walk home and be home alone for about 45 minutes to an hour before a parent arrived. They are generally pretty responsible and get along with each other OK. They don't seem to have strong feelings about this idea one way or the other. We have experimented with letting them stay home alone for short periods (for instance 20 minutes while I run out to get milk) and it's gone just fine. I can't figure out if this idea is empowering, free-range parenting or short-sighted miserliness! I'm totally torn and would love additional perspectives!
My five-year-old complains of headaches only while in the car. We are taking a long road trip next month. Have you dealt with this? How can we minimize the level of miserableness for everyone involved?
I've realized that I have internalized huge amount of shame from my family, abusers, and society. What are some good resources on learning to throw off the shame that isn't yours and if you've experienced it yourself what helped you get stronger in not internalizing that shame?
Can you recommend any great resources to help self-taught graphic designers push their work up a level? So assume a level of competence that doesn't require 101-style 'this is the difference between a sans-serif and a serif' style instruction, but it's a bit rough around the edges. How to improve work that often gets feedback along the lines of 'it's fine but could be slicker'... ? Books, online tutorials etc all welcome. Thanks!
I have been designing for 15 years now, using Illustrator and PowerPoint, and I have a lot of reusable stuff but I don't always remember what it was, or where I saved it, or even that it exists. I need a process (rather than a software solution) to collect these useful things and create an easily browsable and accessible collection.
In the Amazon eating Whole Foods thread there are a lot of negative responses to the buyout. I agree. But after some discussing it in real life, I'm not sure why, besides being raised to distrust big companies and monopolies. Everyone I talked to was dismissive of the buyout. Who cares if a luxury grocery store is purchased by a retail giant with great customer service but poor labor history?
Trying to re-find a website: minimalist design (black text on white, only a few lines of text displaying at a time), simple questions about depression, first one being something like, "Did you drink enough water?"
I need some suggestions for super quick, super low effort meals to keep in the house at all times. Things that don't take much longer to make than a spoonful of peanut butter straight out of the jar. Things that don't spoil, because I never know when the demon of epic exhaustion is going to strike. Things that I can feel good about feeding to my kid, nutritionally. I have fallen into this trap where it has to be either empanadas from scratch or takeout, and it is unsustainable.
Journalist Jancee Dunn examines the inequality in her own family and does something about it. She documented it for everyone. Dunn, mostly known for her work in Rolling Stone, has a new book How Not to Hate Your Husband After Kids. This is a "self-help" book, but better because it is funny and well-researched.
My manager fairly frequently sends me email praising me for my work. I think I'm just doing my job. How should I respond?
My boss is a people pleaser, and true to form, she does not want to tell her boss anything they don't want to hear. My team has been bleeding people (one person has left each year I've been there) and is overloaded with work, but the grandboss is not responsive. Any tips on dealing with my boss in an ethical manner while still showing her that there is no real way to get everything requested completed?
This discussion on the blue has got me thinking about how much anxiety seems to be a factor in the behaviour and performance of many of the people I work with these days.
I'm bored at work and get restless, but I'm stuck. How do I get myself to concentrate when I don't like what I do?
I'm just about to have laser eye surgery and I will be out of commission for over a week, holed up in the dark and pretty much unable to see anything..... My husband is not a bad cook, he just really doesn't cook and I need to give him some easy and flavourful meals to cook while I am out of action.
I have an iPhone 6S with 16 gigs of storage and an iCloud account with 200 gigs of storage. I have a bunch of pictures stored on the cloud, over 60 gigs. My phone constantly has the 'storage almost full' alert. This happens no matter what I delete. How do I fix this?
I am trying to get into to the IT field but my main priority is work life balance. Working no more than 40 hours a week with weekends off would be ideal and bonus would be holidays off ( especially Christmas and new years). The job title doesn't matter to me nor how entry level or how much the pay is. Does such a job exist in tech where you can work 8:00am to 4:30pm M-F with very little to no overtime? Reason: Family and Boyfriend time on the weekend is important to me.
How do I get motivated and start moving with a new job search? I am quite tired of my job and ready to do something else - I'm tired because there is too much to do, and I've been in my role for awhile, and I don't see a future at my confusing jumble of a company. But I'm dragging my feet, for two main reasons: 1) I'm afraid of change (what if every place is like this??) 2) the possibilities are daunting because I could move anywhere (where do I go, how do I even search when I think I'm open to many locales??) How do I calmly, effectively focus efforts on finding something new?
I have a few ideas for posting (and sorting) my photos online. I'm not looking to set up a brand or get a ton of likes/ upvotes, but at the same time, I want my "collections" to be cohesive, partially for personal reasons of browsing my own older photos. What's the best: Instagram, Tumblr, Blogger, or Flicker? POSSE (Post [on your] Own Site, Syndicate Elsewhere) or IFTTT?
My boyfriend reacts badly to very common everyday frustrations. I'm a sensitive person and his negativity really weighs on me. His hot temper also makes me very uncomfortable. How do I talk to him about this?
I'm a manager of things, and that works for me. My next step up the corporate ladder is to manage people, and I don't want to do that. I have ambition, just not in that direction. Have I hit my ceiling?
So, around 2pm today (Friday) the HR manager for the division of the company I work for sent me a meeting invite for Thursday of next week. She included a staff lawyer and HR manager that comes from another division. Neither my manager, nor anyone from the business unit I work for was invited to the meeting. The meeting will be conducted over the phone (all parties work in different locations). I should note that I manage a small team and have 5 direct reports.
After having replaced my coffeemaker(s) (various styles & brands) too many times in too few years, I finally settled on a stainless steel, old-school stovetop percolator and I love it because it just works, there is little waste and the coffee is wonderful and hot.
I am in a new relationship, and it is going well. I am a talker, and if we want to go there, my "love languages" are words of affection and quality time. He is more reserved, and speaks more through action than words. I am enjoying learning new ways to show and receive affection, but I also need words to feel secure...How do I learn to navigate this new communication landscape without sacrificing my needs?
I'm trying to find a replacement for the old Sticky Notes widget -- something that I can just type stuff in (mainly a to-do list), and it sits on my desktop all the time. Of course, snowflakes inside.
The Mr and I are down for the count with the Martian Death Plague. While I do like watching him play RPGs and FPSes, we have discovered there is indeed a limit to the number of hours of video games he can play in a week without going bug-eyed. Looking for YouTube channels and playlists with funny/entertaining/non-depressing brain candy.
Who are the best gurus and best resources for "freeing yourself from the 9 to 5 grind"? Everybody and his brother has a book on how to set up an online business and/or multiple streams of income that will allow you to work from anywhere on your own schedule. Who are the best?
There's a recurring theme of frustration between my husband and I and I don't know how to tell if I have unrealistic expectations, if I'm being unfair, or if this is actually OK to be frustrated about. Or how, practically, to start on making any of it better.
I've been running Windows 10 on a Lenovo B590 for about a year, and have always used a second monitor without any problem... until now.
A family member needs to be told more than once, but then gets angry at me for 'nagging.' How can we get out of this dynamic?
So my husband has decided to take our four year old on a roadtrip to see some family this Thursday - Sunday leaving me with the house to myself for four days with no one to worry about but myself! SCORE! Except it's been so long since I have had that length of alone time (other than work trips where I am not home) that I'm not totally sure how to take advantage of it. Looking for ideas!
I'm in my early thirties and I don't think I've ever been creative. I just don't think I have much imagination for those kinds of things. But it's something I think I'd like in my life, and I'm a little bewildered where to start. Is creativity or imagination something I can learn (or be taught), or is it more innate?
I have serious career burnout. After an exhausting and stressful decade of working at two of the highest profile, most competitive tech companies anywhere, I'm quickly reaching the point where I just can't stand it any longer. I'm stressed all the time, and I'm starting to think it's becoming dangerous for me to have this much stress at this time in my life. Trouble is, I can't seem to decide what to do next. Snowstorm after the jump.
I've noticed a pattern at the software company I work for: our best engineers (not just in terms of engineering but also in terms of their social skills, collaboration, coaching and working well with others) are promoted to engineering leadership roles and given direct reports. This reduces the time they spend actually making things by at least 50% due to the time they spend in management. They often don't make great managers (at least at first) and in some cases they eventually ask to return to being an individual contributor. How can we make this work better? What patterns of success have you seen for this in your own workplaces?
I write quotes for clients on a daily basis, have about 30 products in 3 different colors, I need to produce a quick--hopefully visual quote (want to feature small thumbnails of the items on the quote) Most of my clients call in their orders on the phone---so it would be just producing a quote on my end that i can send them as a PDF. No one uses my web site to actually order items, just peruse them. Mac OS X here but would prefer web app is possible. Please let me know what works for you
I just hosted a party, and for reasons, invested $1.50 in a stack of paper plates for it. I cannot get over how much this tiny thing improved my experience. What other 'small thing made such a huge difference' lifehacks can I try?
I seem to be terrible at interviewing for jobs. I attribute most of this to anxiety around being evaluated, as I always freeze up and my mind goes blank. I think my anxiety makes me come off as timid as well. I've never, EVER, gotten a job from a formal interview process. All of my full time jobs I've obtained via temping; Clients realize that I am an excellent employee despite poor first impressions and hire me permanently. My former co-workers and managers have told me that I'm friendly, articulate, outgoing and professional. I just can't get this across during job interviews.
I'm an anxious beanplater in desperate need of a positive distraction. I want to come up with a long list of activities I can refer to that will help me 'get out of my head' - in other words, the activities are so (manageably, safely) intense or consuming or absorbing that I don't have the time or mental space to waste on unimportant worries and anxieties that would otherwise eat me alive. Effectively helping me to "get out of" my head and stop obsessive thoughts.
I'm looking for suggestions for movie night menus, and activities for at-home date nights.
I'm looking for websites, forums, groups where I can talk to people about pregnancy, birth and childraising without all the stereotypical societal crap. Realism and respect for ambivalence appreciated.
Trying to find a recipe for Mac and Cheese that will serve 15-20 and ideally be able to made completely the day before, and heated in the oven prior to serving.
What activities or pursuits do you find more rejuvenating and relaxing than sitting idly in front of the computer or watching TV? I'm looking for things that I can do on a regular basis that will leave my mental and physical batteries feeling recharged rather than drained.
Loyalty is considered a virtue. However, it doesn't seem to benefit the loyal person very much. If anything, they are much more likely to feel betrayed than their less-loyal counterparts. What does a loyal friend/partner/employee gain from being loyal?
Due to a myriad of reasons I’ve decided the job I’m currently in isn’t one I should stay in for the long term and I’ve begun applying for other jobs. However, the frustrations at the office still get to me. I’m trying to emotionally distance myself but still stay motivated and productive and do my best work (within reason given the circumstances).
Once a week I would like to have Do a Thing Night with my husband, where we do something at home after the kids are in bed, that is outside our daily repertoire. I would like ideas for things to do that are 30-45 minutes, don't require a ton of set-up and clean-up, and don't require excessive advanced planning or supply purchases. Snowflakes inside!
My inner critic can be very superficial and mean to myself and others. How do I shut that guy up?
I've been slowly improving my wardrobe but somehow I'm feeling a kind of impostor syndrome--as though I'm just playing dress-up and look ridiculous.
The past two years have been pretty damn rough for me, but I feel like I'm ready to start being an adult again. Indecisiveness has turned me into a stagnant recluse and I simply can't live like this any longer. The problem is that I don't know where to start, so that's why I'm here.