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How Not to Hate Your Husband After Kids

Journalist Jancee Dunn examines the inequality in her own family and does something about it. She documented it for everyone. Dunn, mostly known for her work in Rolling Stone, has a new book How Not to Hate Your Husband After Kids. This is a "self-help" book, but better because it is funny and well-researched.
posted to MetaFilter by k8t at 1:30 PM on March 26, 2017 (41 comments)

How do I respond to professional praise?

My manager fairly frequently sends me email praising me for my work. I think I'm just doing my job. How should I respond?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 1:39 PM on March 12, 2012 (28 comments)

How do I manage up with a manager who is a people pleaser?

My boss is a people pleaser, and true to form, she does not want to tell her boss anything they don't want to hear. My team has been bleeding people (one person has left each year I've been there) and is overloaded with work, but the grandboss is not responsive. Any tips on dealing with my boss in an ethical manner while still showing her that there is no real way to get everything requested completed?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by knitcrazybooknut at 5:10 PM on March 20, 2017 (5 comments)

Anxiety at work: how to be a better manager to my anxious team members?

This discussion on the blue has got me thinking about how much anxiety seems to be a factor in the behaviour and performance of many of the people I work with these days.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by rpfields at 5:41 PM on March 18, 2017 (30 comments)

How do I fake it (at work)?

I'm bored at work and get restless, but I'm stuck. How do I get myself to concentrate when I don't like what I do?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by kingdead at 9:40 PM on March 12, 2017 (8 comments)

Easy meals my husband can cook for us both

I'm just about to have laser eye surgery and I will be out of commission for over a week, holed up in the dark and pretty much unable to see anything..... My husband is not a bad cook, he just really doesn't cook and I need to give him some easy and flavourful meals to cook while I am out of action.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by JenThePro at 2:15 PM on March 8, 2017 (19 comments)

Free up storage on iphone?

I have an iPhone 6S with 16 gigs of storage and an iCloud account with 200 gigs of storage. I have a bunch of pictures stored on the cloud, over 60 gigs. My phone constantly has the 'storage almost full' alert. This happens no matter what I delete. How do I fix this?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by MisantropicPainforest at 5:35 AM on March 7, 2017 (12 comments)

What are some IT tech jobs that allow to work 40 hours or less a week ?

I am trying to get into to the IT field but my main priority is work life balance. Working no more than 40 hours a week with weekends off would be ideal and bonus would be holidays off ( especially Christmas and new years). The job title doesn't matter to me nor how entry level or how much the pay is. Does such a job exist in tech where you can work 8:00am to 4:30pm M-F with very little to no overtime? Reason: Family and Boyfriend time on the weekend is important to me.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by iwantworklifebalance101 at 8:23 AM on March 7, 2017 (41 comments)

How to get motivated and start taking action for a new job search?

How do I get motivated and start moving with a new job search? I am quite tired of my job and ready to do something else - I'm tired because there is too much to do, and I've been in my role for awhile, and I don't see a future at my confusing jumble of a company. But I'm dragging my feet, for two main reasons: 1) I'm afraid of change (what if every place is like this??) 2) the possibilities are daunting because I could move anywhere (where do I go, how do I even search when I think I'm open to many locales??) How do I calmly, effectively focus efforts on finding something new?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by watrlily at 8:44 PM on March 6, 2017 (8 comments)

Posting photos on Instagram vs Tumblr vs Blogger vs Flickr, 2017 edition

I have a few ideas for posting (and sorting) my photos online. I'm not looking to set up a brand or get a ton of likes/ upvotes, but at the same time, I want my "collections" to be cohesive, partially for personal reasons of browsing my own older photos. What's the best: Instagram, Tumblr, Blogger, or Flicker? POSSE (Post [on your] Own Site, Syndicate Elsewhere) or IFTTT?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by filthy light thief at 10:00 PM on February 28, 2017 (11 comments)

How to talk to someone about their anger and negativity?

My boyfriend reacts badly to very common everyday frustrations. I'm a sensitive person and his negativity really weighs on me. His hot temper also makes me very uncomfortable. How do I talk to him about this?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 11:44 PM on February 21, 2017 (36 comments)

How do I progress at work, when I don't want to manage people?

I'm a manager of things, and that works for me. My next step up the corporate ladder is to manage people, and I don't want to do that. I have ambition, just not in that direction. Have I hit my ceiling?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 8:53 AM on February 19, 2017 (14 comments)

My HR Rep sent me a meeting invite for next week.

So, around 2pm today (Friday) the HR manager for the division of the company I work for sent me a meeting invite for Thursday of next week. She included a staff lawyer and HR manager that comes from another division. Neither my manager, nor anyone from the business unit I work for was invited to the meeting. The meeting will be conducted over the phone (all parties work in different locations). I should note that I manage a small team and have 5 direct reports.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 5:53 AM on February 18, 2017 (35 comments)

Great quality/good design is cheaper

After having replaced my coffeemaker(s) (various styles & brands) too many times in too few years, I finally settled on a stainless steel, old-school stovetop percolator and I love it because it just works, there is little waste and the coffee is wonderful and hot.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Klaxon Aoooogah at 8:05 AM on February 12, 2017 (13 comments)

Help me learn how to NOT talk about my feelings

I am in a new relationship, and it is going well. I am a talker, and if we want to go there, my "love languages" are words of affection and quality time. He is more reserved, and speaks more through action than words. I am enjoying learning new ways to show and receive affection, but I also need words to feel secure...How do I learn to navigate this new communication landscape without sacrificing my needs?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 2:53 AM on February 9, 2017 (15 comments)

Help me stick notes to my Windows 10 desktop!

I'm trying to find a replacement for the old Sticky Notes widget -- something that I can just type stuff in (mainly a to-do list), and it sits on my desktop all the time. Of course, snowflakes inside.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by themissy at 11:06 AM on February 8, 2017 (3 comments)

Entertaining/funny YouTube channels while sick?

The Mr and I are down for the count with the Martian Death Plague. While I do like watching him play RPGs and FPSes, we have discovered there is indeed a limit to the number of hours of video games he can play in a week without going bug-eyed. Looking for YouTube channels and playlists with funny/entertaining/non-depressing brain candy.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by telophase at 9:16 AM on February 4, 2017 (29 comments)

Free yourself from the grind

Who are the best gurus and best resources for "freeing yourself from the 9 to 5 grind"? Everybody and his brother has a book on how to set up an online business and/or multiple streams of income that will allow you to work from anywhere on your own schedule. Who are the best?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Serene Empress Dork at 8:29 AM on January 17, 2017 (18 comments)

Am I being unreasonable?

There's a recurring theme of frustration between my husband and I and I don't know how to tell if I have unrealistic expectations, if I'm being unfair, or if this is actually OK to be frustrated about. Or how, practically, to start on making any of it better.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by a sock with a monkey on it at 9:31 PM on January 12, 2017 (68 comments)

Windows 10 no longer detects second monitor

I've been running Windows 10 on a Lenovo B590 for about a year, and have always used a second monitor without any problem... until now.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by the return of the thin white sock at 11:12 PM on December 28, 2016 (10 comments)

How to not be a nag

A family member needs to be told more than once, but then gets angry at me for 'nagging.' How can we get out of this dynamic?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by ficbot at 6:40 PM on December 17, 2016 (32 comments)

What to do alone for four days?!

So my husband has decided to take our four year old on a roadtrip to see some family this Thursday - Sunday leaving me with the house to myself for four days with no one to worry about but myself! SCORE! Except it's been so long since I have had that length of alone time (other than work trips where I am not home) that I'm not totally sure how to take advantage of it. Looking for ideas!
posted to Ask MetaFilter by polkadot at 3:09 PM on December 12, 2016 (23 comments)

Is there a "Couch to 5k" for creativity?

I'm in my early thirties and I don't think I've ever been creative. I just don't think I have much imagination for those kinds of things. But it's something I think I'd like in my life, and I'm a little bewildered where to start. Is creativity or imagination something I can learn (or be taught), or is it more innate?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by A Robot Ninja at 7:50 AM on November 30, 2016 (15 comments)

Career burnout. Now what?

I have serious career burnout. After an exhausting and stressful decade of working at two of the highest profile, most competitive tech companies anywhere, I'm quickly reaching the point where I just can't stand it any longer. I'm stressed all the time, and I'm starting to think it's becoming dangerous for me to have this much stress at this time in my life. Trouble is, I can't seem to decide what to do next. Snowstorm after the jump.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 3:06 AM on October 26, 2016 (30 comments)

Successfully promoting great software engineers to leadership roles

I've noticed a pattern at the software company I work for: our best engineers (not just in terms of engineering but also in terms of their social skills, collaboration, coaching and working well with others) are promoted to engineering leadership roles and given direct reports. This reduces the time they spend actually making things by at least 50% due to the time they spend in management. They often don't make great managers (at least at first) and in some cases they eventually ask to return to being an individual contributor. How can we make this work better? What patterns of success have you seen for this in your own workplaces?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 8:56 AM on October 13, 2016 (20 comments)

great quoting or invoicing apps?

I write quotes for clients on a daily basis, have about 30 products in 3 different colors, I need to produce a quick--hopefully visual quote (want to feature small thumbnails of the items on the quote) Most of my clients call in their orders on the phone---so it would be just producing a quote on my end that i can send them as a PDF. No one uses my web site to actually order items, just peruse them. Mac OS X here but would prefer web app is possible. Please let me know what works for you
posted to Ask MetaFilter by caveatz at 7:55 AM on October 5, 2016 (3 comments)

Tiny little lifehacks which make a big difference?

I just hosted a party, and for reasons, invested $1.50 in a stack of paper plates for it. I cannot get over how much this tiny thing improved my experience. What other 'small thing made such a huge difference' lifehacks can I try?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by ficbot at 8:00 AM on September 22, 2016 (72 comments)

Acing job interviews while struggling with anxiety?

I seem to be terrible at interviewing for jobs. I attribute most of this to anxiety around being evaluated, as I always freeze up and my mind goes blank. I think my anxiety makes me come off as timid as well. I've never, EVER, gotten a job from a formal interview process. All of my full time jobs I've obtained via temping; Clients realize that I am an excellent employee despite poor first impressions and hire me permanently. My former co-workers and managers have told me that I'm friendly, articulate, outgoing and professional. I just can't get this across during job interviews.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Stonkle at 12:09 PM on August 23, 2016 (12 comments)

Activities to help me 'get out of my head'

I'm an anxious beanplater in desperate need of a positive distraction. I want to come up with a long list of activities I can refer to that will help me 'get out of my head' - in other words, the activities are so (manageably, safely) intense or consuming or absorbing that I don't have the time or mental space to waste on unimportant worries and anxieties that would otherwise eat me alive. Effectively helping me to "get out of" my head and stop obsessive thoughts.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by nightrecordings at 5:15 PM on August 11, 2016 (51 comments)

Help my family have more fun at home!

I'm looking for suggestions for movie night menus, and activities for at-home date nights.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by gerstle at 2:48 PM on August 5, 2016 (23 comments)

Solidarity for a different kind of motherhood

I'm looking for websites, forums, groups where I can talk to people about pregnancy, birth and childraising without all the stereotypical societal crap. Realism and respect for ambivalence appreciated.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by crunchy potato at 11:24 AM on June 15, 2016 (19 comments)

Give your best large batch Mac and Cheese recipe!

Trying to find a recipe for Mac and Cheese that will serve 15-20 and ideally be able to made completely the day before, and heated in the oven prior to serving.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by andruwjones26 at 11:04 AM on May 5, 2016 (20 comments)

Recharging the Battery

What activities or pursuits do you find more rejuvenating and relaxing than sitting idly in front of the computer or watching TV? I'm looking for things that I can do on a regular basis that will leave my mental and physical batteries feeling recharged rather than drained.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by sleepy psychonaut at 8:16 AM on May 5, 2016 (24 comments)

What does being loyal do for the loyal person?

Loyalty is considered a virtue. However, it doesn't seem to benefit the loyal person very much. If anything, they are much more likely to feel betrayed than their less-loyal counterparts. What does a loyal friend/partner/employee gain from being loyal?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Fig at 5:39 PM on April 25, 2016 (36 comments)

Emotionally distancing myself from job while staying productive

Due to a myriad of reasons I’ve decided the job I’m currently in isn’t one I should stay in for the long term and I’ve begun applying for other jobs. However, the frustrations at the office still get to me. I’m trying to emotionally distance myself but still stay motivated and productive and do my best work (within reason given the circumstances).
posted to Ask MetaFilter by TheGreatSloth at 8:13 AM on April 18, 2016 (8 comments)

Do a Thing Night

Once a week I would like to have Do a Thing Night with my husband, where we do something at home after the kids are in bed, that is outside our daily repertoire. I would like ideas for things to do that are 30-45 minutes, don't require a ton of set-up and clean-up, and don't require excessive advanced planning or supply purchases. Snowflakes inside!
posted to Ask MetaFilter by telepanda at 6:53 AM on April 12, 2016 (38 comments)

Inner critic is a bully.

My inner critic can be very superficial and mean to myself and others. How do I shut that guy up?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by MeaninglessMisfortune at 7:44 AM on April 11, 2016 (19 comments)

just a cheap imitation

I've been slowly improving my wardrobe but somehow I'm feeling a kind of impostor syndrome--as though I'm just playing dress-up and look ridiculous.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by a knot unknown at 12:35 PM on April 10, 2016 (31 comments)

How to start doing literally anything.

The past two years have been pretty damn rough for me, but I feel like I'm ready to start being an adult again. Indecisiveness has turned me into a stagnant recluse and I simply can't live like this any longer. The problem is that I don't know where to start, so that's why I'm here.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by omgkinky at 1:09 PM on April 10, 2016 (35 comments)

Is it legal to show web-based art on a screen in a corporate classroom?

My employer is serious about not using copyrighted materials unless you have the copyright holder's permission. But in a classroom situation, might there be "one weird trick" to get around it?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by see_change at 7:07 PM on March 30, 2016 (12 comments)

Email etiquette and expectations for night owls?

After reading this WSJ article about two types of responders to the work-life balance (the "integrators" who mix up work time and home time, and the "separators" who try to draw a line between the two), I realize that I fall firmly into the first camp. I often write emails at midnight or later, after the kids are asleep and the house is quiet. But is this unfair to the recipients of my late-night messages?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by math at 5:26 AM on March 30, 2016 (67 comments)

Best way to clean personal info off work computer?

My work computer is 5 years old and is not responding well to the latest Office upgrade. It only has 4 GB RAM and my tech guy tells me that I need a new laptop. So, yay, but I have been using this laptop for everything for 5 years and I want to make sure that all my personal info and passwords are cleared before turning it in. So, how do I do this? (oh, it's a Latitude E6510, if that matters)
posted to Ask MetaFilter by qldaddy at 3:11 PM on March 29, 2016 (11 comments)

Coping with suddenly severe anxiety

It's been a long time coming, but today my ability to cope with the pressure in my life collapsed, and now I don't know what to do. I'm looking for guidance from others who've gone through this sort of thing.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 5:58 AM on March 29, 2016 (16 comments)

Plus size dresses that'll knock their socks off

I'm performing in a revue at my school in a week and a half; I'm going to be singing a real knockout of a song. I want to look just as amazing as I'll sound. I'm a size 18. Where should I shop this weekend to find my drop dead gorgeous dress? Physical stores preferred.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by ocherdraco at 9:46 PM on March 28, 2016 (23 comments)

What did you replace your comfort eating with?

You are future me. You used to self-sabotage your healthy intentions after shitty days by eating weird, crappy foods. No disordered eating or thinking, just zero self control and a feeling of 'fuck the plan, I'm sad and I deserve to feel better'. What did you successfully replace the weird crappy foods with to give you the same 'comfort blanket' feeling without the sabotage?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by citands at 2:59 AM on March 10, 2016 (40 comments)

How do I regain interest in entertainment?

Over the last 3 years I've lost interest in TV, books, comics and news. This frightens me. Has anyone been through this?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by gadha at 12:11 PM on March 6, 2016 (25 comments)

Learn to code or...what?

I'm a liberal-arts-ish woman who has some experience with computer programming (HTML, CSS and PHP) and a ton of graphics/design experience. I hear about code bootcamps and lots of people changing careers to CS, and I'm wondering if it would be a good idea to try and develop my programming skills. But I'm worried I'm not geeky enough to hack it.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by MetaFilter World Peace at 11:20 AM on February 12, 2016 (18 comments)

Take this job and...keep it?

Should I keep my stable, reasonably paying job with decent work-life balance that I've had for ages but which also makes me kind of sad?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by whistle pig at 10:57 AM on February 14, 2016 (29 comments)

What are some websites I can visit to take a short mental break at work?

Now that Cute Overload closed shop, I have nowhere to run when things get too intense at work. Can you help me find some options?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Tarumba at 1:35 PM on January 27, 2016 (24 comments)

How to Give a Client a Respectful Brush-Off

I’ve been running my own business as a consultant for a few years now and have a category of situation that keeps cropping up that leads me to ask myself, “Is it ok to tell not tell the whole truth in business when the full truth might be awkward or complicated?”
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Anonymous at 6:58 AM on January 26, 2016 (14 comments)
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