Each time you find yourself in a bleary haze of doom and gloom, endlessly rubbing your pain points against your mental palate....look around you. Literally. With your eyes and other senses. Notice that none of the stuff you've built into high drama in your mind is actually happening right here right now. Your ex-girlfriend who was cruel to you isn't here right now. That stupid thing you said last week isn't here right now. Everything that seems to be pressing you down is not here right now.... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by jimmyjimjim at 7:16 PM on December 3, 2008

fourcheesemac said: I am going to pledge here and now to give $5 more (*above my regular contributions) to Obama for every post konolia makes in this thread from here on out -- I want her to feel like she's having some kind of impact!

Who's with me?


I'm in. I'm not going to have the prochoice/antichoice argument again; she and I have been dancing around that fire for nigh onto 7 years now, we're never going to... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by dejah420 at 5:42 PM on September 4, 2008

The "America is a Republic, not a Democracy" trope?

That's been a Republican talking point since Nixon, to color the party with the other name as less American. (Along with the recent intentional misstatement of it as "The Democrat Party" - maybe I should just call her konol.)

Politically, the K lady has been pitching nothing more than slightly-reworded content from the Official Rush/Rove Daily TalkingPoints Email for a long... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by wendell at 11:44 PM on September 3, 2008

I WAS having sex while I was in high school.

[...]

Even if I weren't now opposed to sex before marriage

Or you could perhaps let people make their own decisions. You seemed to enjoy that capacity; why not extend that to the rest of us proles. We're animals. Animals fuck. The notion that others should rail against their own biology -- when you admittedly failed to do so yourself --... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Dark Messiah at 2:41 PM on August 10, 2008

I read the news today, oh boy
4000 poopholes in Blackburn, Lancashire
posted to MetaTalk by ludwig_van at 5:01 PM on July 11, 2008

I tried hacky sex once, but keeping that little beanbag ball in the air was next to impossible.
posted to MetaTalk by MegoSteve at 9:04 PM on June 27, 2008

And apologies to Sian

Have you ever noticed that Sian people do this, and Magenta people do this?

What's all that about?
posted to MetaTalk by PeterMcDermott at 9:22 AM on June 5, 2008

I have no political interest in sex whatsover

Maybe you don't Marie, but I do. I vote that I get to do the nasty with six 20-something Latina Porn Star Jedis. It should be an Act of Parliament.

(Oh, and, good post. I dig your argument.)
posted to MetaFilter by illiad at 3:37 PM on May 20, 2008

This is really a pirate userbase, with a ninja ruling class. It takes a ruthless dictator to hold it together.

On account of late stage diabetes, said dictator is necessarily baby ruthless.
posted to MetaTalk by cortex at 10:15 AM on May 15, 2008

Seriously, do you want to shoot him now or wait 'til you get home?

You could cut up some black trash bags into little circles, put a little light adhesive on the back and cover his workspace with (semi-)Portable Holes.

An audio assault of Michigan J. Frog music accompanied by a pop-up plush frog might be attention-getting... but maybe too much.

I couldn't google up a toy anvil that could be set up to dangle precariously... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by wendell at 11:47 PM on May 13, 2008 marked best answer

Did you get a glipse of the 'Captain's Log?'
posted to MetaFilter by jonmc at 9:13 AM on May 12, 2008

But we need to discuss Dukakis!
posted to MetaTalk by languagehat at 11:55 AM on May 12, 2008

So this is what we've become. Commenters on rare Madonna backing vocal tracks.

The world ends with a whimper.
posted to MetaFilter by DU at 5:16 AM on May 12, 2008

"Every gun that is made, every warship launched, every rocket fired signifies, in the final sense, a theft from those who hunger and are not fed, those who are cold and are not clothed. This world in arms is not spending money alone. It is spending the sweat of its laborers, the genius of its scientists, the hopes of its children.

The cost of one modern heavy bomber is this: a modern brick school in more than 30 cities. It is two electric power plants, each serving... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by sicem07 at 3:31 PM on May 10, 2008

3,000,000,000,000 dollars. That's a lot of zeros.

3 trillion equals 10 fully funded years of welfare/unemployment, and then some. Not that I'm arguing that welfare or unemployment need to be less or more, but that's the kind of money we're talking about, 300 billion a year for 10 years.

We spend maybe a few billion a year on alternative energy research. What is that, in terms of 3 trillion? About a thousand years of alternative energy research at... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by loquacious at 1:37 PM on May 10, 2008

.

Wow, ZachsMind, you sure are a righteous dude. But since you knew in advance pretty much everyone here agrees with you—war is bad, soldiers are dying pointlessly, etc. etc.—your "We can still tell ourselves we're winning. Insert celebratory hooting and hollering here" is pure posturing, and you are not doing anything but trolling for favorites. Enjoy them.
posted to MetaFilter by languagehat at 9:11 AM on May 10, 2008

My worst ebay experience was when I sold my watch to buy my boyfriend a comb, and he sold his hair to buy me a watch chain. Nigerians scammed him out of his hair, so now I don't even have a chain.
posted to MetaFilter by troybob at 3:12 PM on May 9, 2008

Here is a movie of a sock monkey approving Marie Mon Dieu approving Cortex's picture of Kansas City Royals catcher Brent Mayne ('90-'95) throwin' up the fuckin' horns at soundofsuburbia's approval of ColdChef's approval of Jofus's approval (with Marie's Slinky pinwheel looking on in silent approval as well).
posted to MetaTalk by The corpse in the library at 1:35 PM on May 8, 2008

Mitt approves.
posted to MetaTalk by ALongDecember at 11:27 AM on May 8, 2008

Here is a picture of Kansas City Royals catcher Brent Mayne ('90-'95) throwin' up the fuckin' horns at soundofsuburbia's approval of ColdChef's approval of Jofus's approval
posted to MetaTalk by cortex at 7:07 AM on May 8, 2008

I'm so glad that there are people like Mildred Loving out there to fight for rights and for love. What saddens me is that 40 years later, our society is still having this same argument over gay marriage. Why do we keep making the same stupid mistakes over and over again?

So in Mrs Loving's honor, everyone go out there and love the person of your choice and keep on working for the day when government gets the hell out of our bedroom.
posted to MetaFilter by afflatus at 1:54 PM on May 5, 2008

Recent Twitters from all MetaFilter
To add Twitter to your MeFi profile: Preferences -> Optional fields -> Social Apps
posted to MetaFilter by carsonb at 10:57 AM on May 5, 2008

I tried to explain twitter to a coworker last week. His initial takeaway was "wait, so it's like an incredibly shitty blog?"

So I tried to convey the whole SMS-ish spirit of it, the whole micro-update, subscriber-driven, update-from-anywhere thing and that made a little more sense to him but didn't change his fundamental reaction. And I explained TwitterVision and other wierd little mashups and compared it to some other historical social sites/services/apps,... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by cortex at 10:34 AM on May 5, 2008

What's a Nubian?

A lesbian who hasn't been doing it very long?
posted to MetaFilter by Grangousier at 4:53 AM on May 1, 2008

Walter Mitty, I actually clicked on that 2nd link. Damn you!

Oh dear.

By way of apology, here is my real favourite. (It's the Parrot Sketch.)

"HELLO, POLLY! POOOOLLLLLEEEEEE!" *thump thump*

In related news, the Nigerian scam-artist version of said sketch.
posted to MetaFilter by WalterMitty at 4:58 AM on April 28, 2008

SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM :D

I wish I was a Viking.

More Monty Python for everybody!

This is liek my absolutest favouritest 1.
posted to MetaFilter by WalterMitty at 4:44 AM on April 28, 2008

You know, there's a difference between "not wasting too much time obsessing over a corrupt, blatantly political decision that threw the country into a hole it won't get out of for many years" and "getting over it and accepting the fact that our democracy is a sham." Some people here seem to be leaning towards the latter, which is obviously what Scalia and his fellow minions of Satan want.
posted to MetaFilter by languagehat at 4:57 PM on April 25, 2008

Oh my sweet Jesus Christ will the amateur lawyers on this thread please, please, please stop already. Oi gewalt!
posted to MetaFilter by facetious at 7:39 PM on April 24, 2008

In fact, you may be pregnant.
posted to MetaTalk by cortex at 7:24 AM on April 24, 2008

there's some serious stupid going on in this thread.

And I guess anyone who injects a disease virus into someone is pretty stupid too, right? Because that sounds pretty bizarre. And yet...

the virus is dead when it's injected to you. There's no danger. bad analogy

I'm sure you'd say the same thing to a doctor who proscribed penicillin too, because hey, it comes from OMG A FUNGUS!... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by slapshot57 at 11:23 PM on April 15, 2008

Silicone breasts, collagen injections for those lovely bee-stung lips, botox, liposuction, calf-muscle implants (can't leave out the guys): c'mon, self-esteem and mate-attraction hardly make up for the self-indulgent nature of these (marginally) dangerous medical procedures.

Me: I could never afford one of these procedures. And I would feel stupid and selfish spending extra money on fighting off the cosmetic appearance of aging considering how many Third World... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by kozad at 8:56 PM on April 15, 2008

This is why we can't have nice lips.
posted to MetaFilter by Doohickie at 6:12 PM on April 15, 2008

Ironically, none of the who received Botox injections looks surprised.
posted to MetaFilter by Davenhill at 5:53 PM on April 15, 2008

I was talking about the problem of black success with my wife a few days ago. I'm white, she's black. She teaches English at a local high school, and is often frusturated. There is a subculture within the black community that rejects education, that considers it to be a form of submission, that classifies any black person who dilligently seeks education and intellectual development as an Oreo [1]. To the people who subscribe to that subculture, education, success, etc are symbols of... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by sotonohito at 7:19 PM on April 11, 2008

note that the bits they don't much like will most likely have to do with that whole freedom of religion stuff, or the whole right against self incrimination, or equality of the races or whatever. The Constitution of the United States is not a buffet table where you can pick and choose what you want unless you pass an amendment yourself.
posted to MetaFilter by Justinian at 8:28 AM on April 4, 2008

A tip I gleaned from the still-useful Crunchland Method.
posted to MetaTalk by jack_mo at 2:48 AM on April 4, 2008

Parker estimates that it costs him about 12p to write a book, with, perhaps, not much difference in quality from what a competent wordsmith or an MBA might produce.

That's a hell of a "perhaps".
posted to MetaFilter by cortex at 10:44 AM on February 8, 2008

How long would it take for a monkey with a wooden leg to kick all the seeds out of a dill pickle?
posted to MetaTalk by breezeway at 9:52 AM on April 3, 2008

Go to BBQ. It's made for this. AskMe is not. Matt's at the zoo.
posted to MetaTalk by jessamyn at 8:50 AM on April 3, 2008

...and please don't take to heart the implication that those who do not click "disable" do not have lives.
posted to MetaTalk by breezeway at 8:28 AM on April 3, 2008

Hello. koeselitz here, using my wife's account because I don't want to go to the trouble of restarting my old one for one lone comment. Unfortunately, this has to be done, though I promised myself I wouldn't. I found myself ducking in today, and noticed this:

papakwanz: Anyway, why is it that we think that being sodomized is the most absolutely horrible traumatic thing that can happen to a boy? Do we really think that Aristotle needed therapy because Plato... [more]
posted to MetaTalk by Viomeda at 7:27 AM on April 3, 2008

Man, what a shitstorm. I'd just like to thank stav and meatbomb for being thoughtful and having some perspective on the ultimate hot-button issue, and second stav's advice to papakwanz to let it alone. You had a point, you didn't make it as well as you could have, tkchrist is stubborn and has a sharp tongue (and an easy case to make), it didn't go well. Live and learn, and we can all be grateful we're not a kid in Afghanistan.
posted to MetaTalk by languagehat at 7:23 AM on April 3, 2008

Well, actually, I'm sort of glad you brought this to MeTa because I wanted to say something that wasn't really appropriate in the thread.

I recall arguing with tkchrist about this very subject of adolescent sex, although with vastly different circumstances, and I wanted to say that under these circumstances I quite agree with him.

Rape is horrible, child rape is horrible. Equating it, ever, with working for The Man or whether 15 year olds... [more]
posted to MetaTalk by birdie birdington at 1:12 AM on April 3, 2008

Have you tried running a huge magnet over everything?
posted to MetaTalk by Navelgazer at 9:05 AM on April 1, 2008

I know it's not cool to say this, like, outloud and all, but I can't help myself. I love you guys, I really do.
posted to MetaTalk by vers at 11:08 AM on April 1, 2008

We should have done a hidden flash player, starting out on mute, taking 2 minutes to build up in volume to Rick Astley's Never Gonna Give You Up, but that seems meaner.
posted to MetaTalk by mathowie at 8:54 AM on April 1, 2008

I would appreciate a certain shade of red, but that's just me.
posted to MetaTalk by Cranberry at 8:51 AM on April 1, 2008

I think that 10 year olds telling poop jokes is pretty funny myself.
posted to MetaTalk by Meatbomb at 3:49 AM on April 1, 2008

I like MetaFilter, the good, the bad, the funny, the not. If there is a lot of moderation going on (and there must, 70,000+ hands in the cookie jar) it's very good moderation.

There's all this "metafilter is on the decline" talk going around. I don't see anything declining. The "best of the web" is totally subjective and the best thing about this site is being able to bring something forward and let people have at it. Sure, it's not for the... [more]
posted to MetaTalk by M Edward at 10:07 PM on March 31, 2008

Contemporary fart, then.
posted to MetaTalk by cortex at 6:19 PM on March 31, 2008