The Internet Is The Future
August 1, 2005 6:46 AM Subscribe
The Future Is Just Like You Imagined. Somewhere in California, director Richard Kelly is filming his next movie.
Kevin Smith, The Rock, Seann William Scott, and Sarah Michelle Gellar? I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
posted by monju_bosatsu at 7:01 AM on August 1, 2005
posted by monju_bosatsu at 7:01 AM on August 1, 2005
This is either going to suck or be really, really awesome. I can't make up my mind.
posted by 40 Watt at 7:06 AM on August 1, 2005
posted by 40 Watt at 7:06 AM on August 1, 2005
In other news, the present is much like it was envisioned in 1985.
posted by alumshubby at 7:16 AM on August 1, 2005
posted by alumshubby at 7:16 AM on August 1, 2005
The future will have slow, ugly, clumsy flash interfaces?
Actually, that is how I imagined it.
posted by signal at 7:33 AM on August 1, 2005
Actually, that is how I imagined it.
posted by signal at 7:33 AM on August 1, 2005
Kelly: "The film is going to be a strange hybrid of the sensibilities of Andy Warhol and Philip K. Dick."
uhm, what?
posted by mek at 7:46 AM on August 1, 2005
uhm, what?
posted by mek at 7:46 AM on August 1, 2005
The future seems to consist of an awful lot of tedious Flash wankage.
posted by Artw at 8:17 AM on August 1, 2005
posted by Artw at 8:17 AM on August 1, 2005
uhm, what?
He said it was a strange hybrid, dummy. Also, can we get another blah blah flash sucks comment, please? Because it's original, and it never gets old.
Hey, I'm not among those who lurrrrrve Donnie Darko, but I am curious about this one.
What about the website doesn't make any sense? It's a promotional web site for a film that's in the early stages of production.
posted by ghastlyfop at 8:39 AM on August 1, 2005
He said it was a strange hybrid, dummy. Also, can we get another blah blah flash sucks comment, please? Because it's original, and it never gets old.
Hey, I'm not among those who lurrrrrve Donnie Darko, but I am curious about this one.
What about the website doesn't make any sense? It's a promotional web site for a film that's in the early stages of production.
posted by ghastlyfop at 8:39 AM on August 1, 2005
"What about the website doesn't make any sense? It's a promotional web site for a film that's in the early stages of production."
Hm, perhaps the fact that there is a complete lack of content? Did that bother anyone else? Because I enjoyed the DD website somewhat, but right now all the Southland Tales site has is a bunch of buttons that say "Graphic Novels Coming Soon". Great!
So, right, the part that doesn't make any sense is why this website was posted.
posted by voltairemodern at 8:54 AM on August 1, 2005
Hm, perhaps the fact that there is a complete lack of content? Did that bother anyone else? Because I enjoyed the DD website somewhat, but right now all the Southland Tales site has is a bunch of buttons that say "Graphic Novels Coming Soon". Great!
So, right, the part that doesn't make any sense is why this website was posted.
posted by voltairemodern at 8:54 AM on August 1, 2005
well, at least it quoted from my favorite Jane's Addiction song.
posted by evening at 8:57 AM on August 1, 2005
posted by evening at 8:57 AM on August 1, 2005
"In the FUTCHAER, everyone will post nigh-impossible to navigate flash-based websites for films they haven't even finished principal photography on, with no meaningful content whatsoever. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED."
Also, is it just me or is there something wrong when it's a tossup between an ex-pro wrestler, and an ex-pro skater, as to who the most talented actor is in your cast...
posted by stenseng at 9:03 AM on August 1, 2005
Also, is it just me or is there something wrong when it's a tossup between an ex-pro wrestler, and an ex-pro skater, as to who the most talented actor is in your cast...
posted by stenseng at 9:03 AM on August 1, 2005
Finished principle photography? Correct me if I'm wrong, but it says it doesn't start until August 15th, 2005. Probably a good reason why there's no content on the site.
posted by basicchannel at 9:12 AM on August 1, 2005
posted by basicchannel at 9:12 AM on August 1, 2005
Southland Tales is an ensemble piece set in the futuristic landscape of Los Angeles on July 4, 2008, as it stands on the brink of social, economic and environmental disaster. Johnson will star as Boxer Santaros, an action star stricken with amnesia whose life intertwines with Krysta Now (Gellar), an adult film star developing her own reality television project, and David Clark (Scott), a Hermosa Beach police officer who holds the key to a vast conspiracy.
Uhm, okay.
posted by mrbill at 9:17 AM on August 1, 2005
Uhm, okay.
posted by mrbill at 9:17 AM on August 1, 2005
In the future, flash interfaces will be everywhere.
In the future, the VT100 will be back in style.
posted by darksquirrel at 9:27 AM on August 1, 2005
In the future, the VT100 will be back in style.
posted by darksquirrel at 9:27 AM on August 1, 2005
In the future, flash interfaces without even the names of movies will be made for movies which haven't even been pitched yet, consisting of hyper-slow transitional fades (using the power of multi-core cell processors to provide the computing power needed for extra-slow transitions) and boxes saying "Possibly coming soon, if pitch is accepted".
posted by Bugbread at 9:42 AM on August 1, 2005
posted by Bugbread at 9:42 AM on August 1, 2005
This website does not bode well for the film. Bone headed bush-league bullshit.
I saw Darko at Park City. And the second reel was loaded upside down and back wards. So it never made sense even with the embarassed cast and director trying to narrate while they attempted to locate a projector person. I rented it after it came out on DVD - and the begining is strong - great mood, etc - but after seeing the ending right-side-up I was equally confused and disappointe (and Drew Barrymore SUCKS).
posted by tkchrist at 9:44 AM on August 1, 2005
I saw Darko at Park City. And the second reel was loaded upside down and back wards. So it never made sense even with the embarassed cast and director trying to narrate while they attempted to locate a projector person. I rented it after it came out on DVD - and the begining is strong - great mood, etc - but after seeing the ending right-side-up I was equally confused and disappointe (and Drew Barrymore SUCKS).
posted by tkchrist at 9:44 AM on August 1, 2005
Who's an ex-pro skater?
posted by ghastlyfop at 9:47 AM on August 1, 2005
posted by ghastlyfop at 9:47 AM on August 1, 2005
"Correct me if I'm wrong, but it says it doesn't start until August 15th, 2005. Probably a good reason why there's no content on the site."
Not wrong at all. A very good reason that there's no content on the site. The real question is, why would a site with no content be posted to MetaFilter? (Not that it's the first time or anything, but this one got my hopes up before letting me down hard.)
posted by voltairemodern at 9:51 AM on August 1, 2005
Not wrong at all. A very good reason that there's no content on the site. The real question is, why would a site with no content be posted to MetaFilter? (Not that it's the first time or anything, but this one got my hopes up before letting me down hard.)
posted by voltairemodern at 9:51 AM on August 1, 2005
Uh, there are some other links included in the post. They have some content.
posted by ghastlyfop at 10:14 AM on August 1, 2005
posted by ghastlyfop at 10:14 AM on August 1, 2005
The only thing interesting here is that the website uses Keyhole. It's the the first use of it I've seen in the wild.
posted by rafter at 10:57 AM on August 1, 2005
posted by rafter at 10:57 AM on August 1, 2005
Jason Lee is an ex-pro skater
posted by thebatmanager at 11:02 AM on August 1, 2005
posted by thebatmanager at 11:02 AM on August 1, 2005
It took me forever to see it, but I finally saw Donnie Darko when the Director's Cut was released to theaters. And I was sort of on the fence about it (except for one thing -- as tkchrist points out, Drew Barrymore SUCKS; saw March of the Penguins last night and one of the trailers before it was for some movie about a guy wanting to Date Drew Barrymore, and I turned to my companions and said "Hey, at least he's setting his sights low".), but after thinking about it came up with a really good explanation for it that I thought worked and explained the flaws and whatnot...
...then, I read the thing Salon published about it, with a lot of stuff from Kelly hisself in interviews and whatnot which basically said that the film was to be taken at face value and I always thought that was the worst possible interpretation of the film, and if that was the movie he made, it sucked.
For those interested, and SPOILERS if you haven't seen it, my version of the film is basically that the only things that happen are the first chunk of the film, and Donnie getting squished by the jet engine. The rest of the film is Donnie's brain basically making up this story for him in his last moments of consciousness -- sort of a Final Death Dream, since the brain can make up experiences and such that last longer perceptively than they do in Real Time (for example -- we've all had dreams that felt like they were a few hours long, but they actually took place in just a short amount of time). Anyway, this explains why the film has sort of a feel of a story written by a naive but talented teenager; parts of the story that don't really work, or just seem kind of stupid or whatever (like, OK, I'm sorry, the whole "Sit next to the boy you think is the cutest!" thing is oh god so lame, but it's so something that'd happen in an Obvious Fictional Story). I always figured that was a good version just because, well, it means all the lame stuff like that isn't actually lame, but intentionally so, since the character of Donnie is a bright, creative kid, who if he'd been around longer and had more practice and stuff probably would have been doing good stories -- the bulk of the film is like a story where you go "Well, it's not great, but the writer (Donnie) definitely has potential and will be a great writer some day".
Then, well, I find out that Kelly actually didn't intend that at all and that all the worldline bullshit was supposed to be The Real World and that the reveal with Gretchen at the end is supposed to be OMG SHOCK!!1111 or something (in my version: in the real world, Donnie'd seen Gretchen around, hadn't met her or anything, but gone "Oh, she's cute" or whatever, and his brain in the Death Dream decided to fulfill that particular fantasy of hooking up with that cute girl he'd seen around the past day or two, giving her a backstory and everything), and it's just... urgh.
I basically went from "This film is very, very overrated, but I'm glad I saw it" to "Actually, upon further examination, it's kinda neat" back to "Oh, god, this film is so overrated and the director's kind of an idiot."
It's been a while since I've seen it, but upon reading the article, I basically remember my main Point Of Compliment for Kelly was that I did think it was pretty cool that he did get the Smurf-lore pretty much right.
Then I got kind of embarrassed that I could tell whether or not it was right.
I might see the new one, though -- since, well, after all, my view of Donnie Darko was that it was written by someone who wasn't great but had quite a bit of potential he he'd gotten more experience, and, well, I always thought I was talking about the character, but apparently I was talking about Kelly himself.
(and hopefully Drew Barrymore won't be in this one -- she was easily the worst thing about Donnie Darko. She so cannot fucking act.)
posted by Rev. Syung Myung Me at 11:40 AM on August 1, 2005
...then, I read the thing Salon published about it, with a lot of stuff from Kelly hisself in interviews and whatnot which basically said that the film was to be taken at face value and I always thought that was the worst possible interpretation of the film, and if that was the movie he made, it sucked.
For those interested, and SPOILERS if you haven't seen it, my version of the film is basically that the only things that happen are the first chunk of the film, and Donnie getting squished by the jet engine. The rest of the film is Donnie's brain basically making up this story for him in his last moments of consciousness -- sort of a Final Death Dream, since the brain can make up experiences and such that last longer perceptively than they do in Real Time (for example -- we've all had dreams that felt like they were a few hours long, but they actually took place in just a short amount of time). Anyway, this explains why the film has sort of a feel of a story written by a naive but talented teenager; parts of the story that don't really work, or just seem kind of stupid or whatever (like, OK, I'm sorry, the whole "Sit next to the boy you think is the cutest!" thing is oh god so lame, but it's so something that'd happen in an Obvious Fictional Story). I always figured that was a good version just because, well, it means all the lame stuff like that isn't actually lame, but intentionally so, since the character of Donnie is a bright, creative kid, who if he'd been around longer and had more practice and stuff probably would have been doing good stories -- the bulk of the film is like a story where you go "Well, it's not great, but the writer (Donnie) definitely has potential and will be a great writer some day".
Then, well, I find out that Kelly actually didn't intend that at all and that all the worldline bullshit was supposed to be The Real World and that the reveal with Gretchen at the end is supposed to be OMG SHOCK!!1111 or something (in my version: in the real world, Donnie'd seen Gretchen around, hadn't met her or anything, but gone "Oh, she's cute" or whatever, and his brain in the Death Dream decided to fulfill that particular fantasy of hooking up with that cute girl he'd seen around the past day or two, giving her a backstory and everything), and it's just... urgh.
I basically went from "This film is very, very overrated, but I'm glad I saw it" to "Actually, upon further examination, it's kinda neat" back to "Oh, god, this film is so overrated and the director's kind of an idiot."
It's been a while since I've seen it, but upon reading the article, I basically remember my main Point Of Compliment for Kelly was that I did think it was pretty cool that he did get the Smurf-lore pretty much right.
Then I got kind of embarrassed that I could tell whether or not it was right.
I might see the new one, though -- since, well, after all, my view of Donnie Darko was that it was written by someone who wasn't great but had quite a bit of potential he he'd gotten more experience, and, well, I always thought I was talking about the character, but apparently I was talking about Kelly himself.
(and hopefully Drew Barrymore won't be in this one -- she was easily the worst thing about Donnie Darko. She so cannot fucking act.)
posted by Rev. Syung Myung Me at 11:40 AM on August 1, 2005
I hope there'll be flying cars three years from now. I'm tired of waiting until 2019 to ride in one.
posted by Smart Dalek at 11:55 AM on August 1, 2005
posted by Smart Dalek at 11:55 AM on August 1, 2005
Rev. Syung Myung Me : "kind of stupid or whatever (like, OK, I'm sorry, the whole 'Sit next to the boy you think is the cutest!' thing is oh god so lame, but it's so something that'd happen in an Obvious Fictional Story)"
Rev. Syung Myung Me : "if he'd been around longer and had more practice and stuff"
Rev. Syung Myung Me : "the end is supposed to be OMG SHOCK!!1111 or something"
Rev. Syung Myung Me : "hadn't met her or anything, but gone 'Oh, she's cute' or whatever"
Rev. Syung Myung Me : "giving her a backstory and everything"
Totally to the max and stuff.
posted by Bugbread at 12:10 PM on August 1, 2005
Rev. Syung Myung Me : "if he'd been around longer and had more practice and stuff"
Rev. Syung Myung Me : "the end is supposed to be OMG SHOCK!!1111 or something"
Rev. Syung Myung Me : "hadn't met her or anything, but gone 'Oh, she's cute' or whatever"
Rev. Syung Myung Me : "giving her a backstory and everything"
Totally to the max and stuff.
posted by Bugbread at 12:10 PM on August 1, 2005
Hmmmmmm. Talk about clunky Flash. Seems to be the only site I've seen yet that insists I need to install Flash every time I try navigating around.
posted by Samizdata at 1:05 PM on August 1, 2005
posted by Samizdata at 1:05 PM on August 1, 2005
Hey, I write like I speak. And I speak like a total idiot.
posted by Rev. Syung Myung Me at 1:13 PM on August 1, 2005
posted by Rev. Syung Myung Me at 1:13 PM on August 1, 2005
No worries. I just find that mode of expression amusing. It wasn't an attack or anything.
posted by Bugbread at 4:57 PM on August 1, 2005
posted by Bugbread at 4:57 PM on August 1, 2005
The story sounds interesting--a sci-fi Magnolia, perhapss? But the cast is terrible. DD had a great cast, at least. Who knows, maybe Kelly's a genius and it'll all work. Didn't I hear that this was a musical?
posted by zardoz at 5:16 PM on August 1, 2005
posted by zardoz at 5:16 PM on August 1, 2005
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