Stuck

November 3, 2005 12:25 PM

I have always viewed those large home improvement warehouse stores as dangerous places, but not exactly for this reason. Whew.
posted by terrier319 (32 comments total)

First comment
posted by poppo at 12:28 PM on November 3, 2005

wtf?
posted by Manhasset at 12:34 PM on November 3, 2005

Farkalicious
posted by jonson at 12:35 PM on November 3, 2005

o_rly_owl.jpg =/
posted by rxrfrx at 12:37 PM on November 3, 2005

What? You going to read your News of the Weird articles and just post one a day? You got 'em stockpiled or what?
posted by xmutex at 12:38 PM on November 3, 2005

metafarkler
posted by dontoine at 12:41 PM on November 3, 2005

You never read the posting guidelines, did you?
posted by uni verse at 12:52 PM on November 3, 2005

Now that's what I call a sticky situation.
posted by rolypolyman at 12:56 PM on November 3, 2005

from the article, "They just let me rot."

Good heavens, what had he eaten previously? If need be, I can survive on a toilet for hours.
posted by Peter H at 12:59 PM on November 3, 2005

So someone was actually looking for crap service at one of these stores, and still didn't get it.
posted by Shfishp at 1:00 PM on November 3, 2005

crap service

Ha-Ha.
posted by Peter H at 1:09 PM on November 3, 2005

Shfishp, that is comic genius...I am imagining it coming from Triumph the ICD
posted by poppo at 1:24 PM on November 3, 2005

After this was posted on Fark yesterday, someone pointed out that the glue was probably put down by the guy who got stuck because 1) if it were super-glue, whoever put it down would have had to have done so just seconds before this retard sat down and 2) if it were not superglue, how did this retard not notice the sticky substance when he sat down?
posted by notmtwain at 1:26 PM on November 3, 2005

I have always viewed those large home improvement warehouse stores as dangerous places, but not exactly for this reason.

so tell us your reason.
posted by quonsar at 1:27 PM on November 3, 2005

Reuters and AP both have their onw 'wierd news' sections. Here's one I like.
posted by IronLizard at 1:29 PM on November 3, 2005

That represents a lack of understanding about how cyanoacrylate works - moisture is what activates it. In a very dry environment it could sit out and still be ready to bond things for a good amount of time. Additionally it's available in a number of forms and I expect one of the gel types would last longer w/o setting. Or perhaps it was just down so long it developed a 'skin' which was burst when he sat on it.

And aside from that, cyanoacrylate isn't the only fast-setting adhesive out there by a long shot.
posted by phearlez at 1:30 PM on November 3, 2005

I am imagining it coming from Triumph the ICD

Well...Home Depot is a pretty good store...for me to poop on!
posted by Shfishp at 1:35 PM on November 3, 2005

Quonsar, I walk around these stores mostly fixed upward at these vaulted racks, and thinking one poorly stacked shower enclosure or mahogony door and crash! I'm a goner. Maybe that's an over-reaction based on the odds, but it has happened more than once at these stores.
posted by terrier319 at 1:45 PM on November 3, 2005

Could have been contact cement.
posted by five fresh fish at 1:46 PM on November 3, 2005

I'm late for my semifore lesson! Has anybody seen my FLAGs?
posted by PinkStainlessTail at 1:47 PM on November 3, 2005

I walk around these stores mostly fixed upward at these vaulted racks, and thinking one poorly ...

Me, I just fear rape in the tool aisle.
posted by Peter H at 2:02 PM on November 3, 2005

They have piping that's over twenty feet long, too. Frightening.
posted by Peter H at 2:03 PM on November 3, 2005

one poorly stacked shower enclosure

Let's ground this fluffy post with some serious tragedy
posted by CynicalKnight at 2:46 PM on November 3, 2005

posted by caddis at 3:24 PM on November 3, 2005

fandango_matt writes "but he'd have needed to apply a coat of contact cement to both his ass and the toilet seat and allow both to dry before attaching the two surfaces."

There are several contact adesives that only require one surface be coated. 3M makes several in spray form.
posted by Mitheral at 3:36 PM on November 3, 2005

Let's ground this fluffy post with some serious tragedy

The founder of home depot, Bernie Marcus, used to say, as a sales slogan, "stack 'em high and watch 'em fly" (off the shelves). Indeed.
posted by terrier319 at 4:05 PM on November 3, 2005

Whoreburning nunshitters! This fucking post is still here!?

Well... shit. Fine, then. Can I get a squirrel packing some large nuts? KTHXBYE.
posted by loquacious at 5:30 PM on November 3, 2005

posted by caddis at 6:14 PM on November 3, 2005

Oddly Enough
posted by blue_beetle at 8:53 PM on November 3, 2005

HOORAY FOR NUTS
posted by loquacious at 1:06 AM on November 4, 2005

"No beer and no TV make Homer something something."

"'Go crazy'?"

"Don't mind if I do!"
posted by gohlkus at 2:28 AM on November 4, 2005

I'd use the power of the internet to research this, but unfortunately there's no "ass" category.
posted by ook at 5:13 AM on November 4, 2005