Ask your doctor(?) about Panexa!
November 4, 2005 12:06 PM   Subscribe

Panexa. Ask your doctor for a reason to take it. via
posted by pitchblende (40 comments total)
 
I'm getting sick of drug ads, real or fake. These have become the equivalent lame email forwards of the 90s.
posted by furtive at 12:07 PM on November 4, 2005


1. Open a Cafepress store.

2. ??

3. Profit.


I'm getting bored of the ?? part getting posted here.
posted by fire&wings at 12:12 PM on November 4, 2005


lame. or should i say lame
posted by spicynuts at 12:13 PM on November 4, 2005


hmmm...i guess what's lame is my html skills. it looked fine in preview.
posted by spicynuts at 12:13 PM on November 4, 2005


lame and very wordy. anyone care to explain?
posted by lemonfridge at 12:19 PM on November 4, 2005


anyone care to explain?

Sure. Here's the joke: Panexa. Ask your doctor for a reason to take it.

Still don't get it? Cause, uh...the joke's right there.
posted by billysumday at 12:21 PM on November 4, 2005


You just did, lemonfridge.
posted by dazed_one at 12:21 PM on November 4, 2005


Did you see the thing where Cafepress removed it because they thought it was a trademark infringement?
posted by Ethereal Bligh at 12:23 PM on November 4, 2005


EB: I think this is more interesting than the site itself.
posted by erebora at 12:26 PM on November 4, 2005


IMPORTANT INFORMATION FOR SQUIRRELS

PANEXA has been known in a few cases (0.0087%) to cause Excessively Floppy Tail Syndrome (EFTS). If you are a squirrel, and suspect you may be suffering from EFTS, immediately call the Hotline at 1-800-867-5309.


Damn.
posted by panoptican at 12:28 PM on November 4, 2005


Be careful, Panexa may interact with the other widely popular drug, Obecalp.
posted by briank at 12:29 PM on November 4, 2005


Pediatric use: Expired PANEXA may be disposed of by feeding to children in a bowl with milk.

I chortled.
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 12:30 PM on November 4, 2005


Excessively Floppy Tail Syndrome

So is that what the kids are calling it today?

[PS - Heterocil was funnier.]
posted by spiderwire at 12:37 PM on November 4, 2005


[ yawn ]
posted by seawallrunner at 12:37 PM on November 4, 2005


Also, PANEXA can contribute to developing inhumanly powerful tongue muscles, capable of licking through steel.

Sweet! I mean steel is sweet when you get through the tough outer shell to the creamy goodness inside!
posted by fenriq at 12:40 PM on November 4, 2005


I take it for the explosive diarrhea.
posted by LordSludge at 12:43 PM on November 4, 2005


PANEXA can cause buttock muscles to mirror the actions of the jaw muscles.

Well, heavens to betsy.
posted by selfmedicating at 12:46 PM on November 4, 2005


What kind of crazy person comes up with licking through steel?
posted by Ethereal Bligh at 12:47 PM on November 4, 2005


In a small number of tested cases (84%) PANEXAwas found to cause abdominal wall muscle breakdown coupled with spasmodic activity in lower back/spinal muscles, resulting in most patients violently bending forward like a book slamming shut.

Interesting image....
posted by brundlefly at 12:47 PM on November 4, 2005


slowloada
posted by dontoine at 12:48 PM on November 4, 2005


I thought it was subtle and funny. Does this make me a bad person?
posted by xmutex at 12:56 PM on November 4, 2005


Very funny, and I wouldn't have seen it otherwise. Great post.
posted by lbergstr at 1:08 PM on November 4, 2005


Without a doubt, this is the best of the web.
posted by pieoverdone at 1:20 PM on November 4, 2005


immediately call the Hotline at 1-800-867-5309

May I speak to Jenny? Who can I turn to?
posted by thanotopsis at 1:24 PM on November 4, 2005


pieoverdone, you do know what Metafilter's first link was, right?
posted by lbergstr at 1:28 PM on November 4, 2005


"Ocelot".
posted by Sand at 1:30 PM on November 4, 2005


Metafilter: Like scurvy, but louder.
posted by Dipsomaniac at 1:49 PM on November 4, 2005


...prehensile colon...

Damn. This happened to me when I was using Paxil.
posted by bachelor#3 at 1:57 PM on November 4, 2005


Do not taunt PANEXA
posted by Tacitus at 2:07 PM on November 4, 2005


I take it for the explosive diarrhea.

Which is funny when you know what "Merd" (the fake company that makes this fake drug) means in French (actually, it's spelled merde, but it was still funny).
posted by sharpener at 2:07 PM on November 4, 2005


I thought it was subtle and funny. Does this make me a bad person?

No xmutex. I've been down (yes, I know, take some Panexa) and I needed a good laugh. This provided same. Thanks pitchblende.

Information for squirrels was among my favorite, as was the way to dispose of it.

What real drug is it that actually has the warning (I've heard it in commercials) that women shouldn't even handle it - some potency enhancer?

Also, one of my all-time favorite drug warning ads was for a bladder-control product. One of the side effects was diarrhea. Now, if I have to choose, I think I'd stick with the peeing problems rather than the pooping side fx.
posted by NorthernLite at 4:38 PM on November 4, 2005


huh huh drugs are overproscribed and advertized to everyone.

That's teh fuuuuuuuunaaaaaay
posted by delmoi at 4:50 PM on November 4, 2005


What real drug is it that actually has the warning (I've heard it in commercials) that women shouldn't even handle it

Accutane. You apparently if you're knocked up and touch this shit, you can get some seriously gorked up babies
posted by pieoverdone at 4:56 PM on November 4, 2005


yes accutane is one, but propecia is the other that popped up most recently. it works by blocking the conversion of one form of testosterone to another, which can severely damage a male fetus. possibly also a female one, not sure.
posted by joeblough at 5:24 PM on November 4, 2005


I laughed out loud at this one. (and I rarely laugh out loud even though I may type LOL)
posted by Megafly at 5:45 PM on November 4, 2005


"WAAAH! You posted a link to something that you found funny, but I found trivial and not worthy of the mighty Blue--the precious Filter that is Meta! WAAAAH!"

Link clicked, enjoyed and passed on. Good show pitch.
posted by Jesse H Christ at 6:14 PM on November 4, 2005


Also, PANEXA can contribute to developing inhumanly powerful tongue muscles, capable of licking through steel.

So, it'll make you popular with the ladies?
posted by clevershark at 7:48 PM on November 4, 2005


isn't this the 36th (and least creative) fake drug add posted here?
posted by dogsplit at 9:11 PM on November 4, 2005


Wouldn't it have been better as "panexea"?
(I guess that's not drug-namey enough.)
posted by nobody at 12:21 PM on November 5, 2005


The trouble with this is the ad part is pretty terrifically unfunny - whereas the small print is very good, for this type of thing. I'm glad I went back after giving it a cursory lookover and declaring 'meh'.
posted by Sparx at 2:29 PM on November 6, 2005


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