"I hope I'm still around to catch the cockring at Sulu's. . ."

August 29, 2006 6:12 PM

Youtubefilter: William Shatner gets roasted by the likes of Betty White, George "Sulu" Takei, Jeffrey Ross, and Lisa Lampanelli. Not to be outdone, Kirk responds.
posted by bardic (37 comments total)

After sitting through about half of the Shatner roast, I couldn't shake the feeling that the assembled roasters weren't entirely sure of the evening's purpose. Or maybe they just didn't have the talent to pull it off.

There he sits, the man who has made of himself (quite unapologetically) the very definition of a show business punchline, and yet the best that many of these folks can do is sling dumb blonde jokes about Farrah Fawcett (also in attendance) or gay jokes about George Takei. Most of them just stood and delivered with notes in hand, sounding like those notes were cribbed from another comedian that just left the dais.

The best of the night? Betty White ... oddly enough, a veteran of the original Dean Martin era roasts.
posted by grabbingsand at 6:18 PM on August 29, 2006

Watched this the other night. Betty White absolutely killed.
posted by kosem at 6:18 PM on August 29, 2006

...and I agree. Far too many gay Takei jokes.
posted by kosem at 6:19 PM on August 29, 2006

I thought Nichelle looked FABULOUS, didn't you? And I thought Takei was pretty funny, queering it up in stentorian tones.
posted by WolfDaddy at 6:20 PM on August 29, 2006

Guthy Renker: Community Weblog
posted by Smart Dalek at 6:23 PM on August 29, 2006

Andy Dick finally gets put in his place! It's about time comedians tackled that sacred cow.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 6:30 PM on August 29, 2006 [1 favorite]

posted by monju_bosatsu at 6:32 PM on August 29, 2006

Really, why so much focus on George Takei being gay? That just seems lazy. After all, they could just as easily have talked about him being Star Trek's token Asian character.

I mean sure, most of the focus was on the big three--Kirk, Spock, and McCoy. But many was the time when Sulu would steal the show with his emotional rendition of "Yes, sir," or, "Aye, Captain." It brings a tear to my eye even now.
posted by magodesky at 6:46 PM on August 29, 2006

TOS fans, please help. What's Kirk actually screaming in monju_bosatsu's hypnotic gif?
posted by Phlogiston at 6:52 PM on August 29, 2006

TOS fans, please help. What's Kirk actually screaming in monju_bosatsu's hypnotic gif?

What?

He's yelling, "I sucked his cock!" Don't you remember that episode?
posted by magodesky at 6:55 PM on August 29, 2006

It looks to me like he's saying, "I...can't decide!"
posted by Mach3avelli at 6:56 PM on August 29, 2006

"I'm Captain Kirk!" It's evil Kirk after the transporter split him into evil-decisive and good-wimpy personas in The Enemy Within.

One of the things evil Kirk did was suck Sulu's cock.
posted by brownpau at 7:00 PM on August 29, 2006

YouTube can be sad, too.
posted by billysumday at 7:01 PM on August 29, 2006

It was a good roast, and Shatner was pretty good in rebuttal. Boston Legal has been good for this boy.
posted by caddis at 7:01 PM on August 29, 2006

Shatner doesn't need comedians to roast him. They should've just played this (.mov) over and over in front of the live audience.
posted by mullacc at 7:15 PM on August 29, 2006

Fact: Betty White can make anything awesome.
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 7:32 PM on August 29, 2006

Wow, tough crowd. Geraldo, Oswalt, and Lampenelii were pretty damn good. Dick's schtik was pretty good, but I'd rather see a old fashioned roast than a performance piece. I also didnt like the remote pieces, they're always so artificial and smarmy compared to a live roast. If anyone had to go it was Fawcett. Wow, the airhead stereotype just gets stronger as she ages, but she did look amazing for her age.
posted by damn dirty ape at 7:35 PM on August 29, 2006

Also, as far as the 'Shatner kicked ass' and 'Shatners a comedic genius' sentiment goes: He's an actor. He reads scripts. His comedic material is as much his as he is truly a captain of a starship. Kudos to his writers. In real life he writes train wrecks like this.
posted by damn dirty ape at 7:44 PM on August 29, 2006

The bit with Leonard Nimoy is pretty funny.
posted by furtive at 7:50 PM on August 29, 2006

otter vomit is tasty.
posted by thanatogenous at 7:53 PM on August 29, 2006

It could have been better - like if it had been done while Doohan and Kelly were alive. But it was still pretty good.
posted by tkchrist at 8:20 PM on August 29, 2006

In real life he writes train wrecks like this.

In real life, every one of his novels was ghostwritten by Gar and Judith Reeves-Stevens.
posted by solid-one-love at 8:24 PM on August 29, 2006

Betty White was my favorite. Anyone notice that Shatner now looks like W.C. Fields?
posted by Skygazer at 8:43 PM on August 29, 2006

...Shatner looks like my dad. This is not easy for me to deal with.
posted by WolfDaddy at 8:57 PM on August 29, 2006

damn dirty ape: ".... If anyone had to go it was Fawcett. Wow, the airhead stereotype just gets stronger as she ages, but she did look amazing for her age."

Amazing? I thought she looked a bit frightening, as if her face was carved out of plastic. Which it likely is. I don't think her upper lip could even move.

But I agree with you that the roast was pretty good fun, ayuh.
posted by John Smallberries at 9:12 PM on August 29, 2006

I was amazed at the benign tone of the roast -- Shatner must honestly be a well-liked guy. As he himself said -- "this was the best you could do?" Compare, for example, the tone of the Chevy Chase roast, where Chevy Chase was essentially eviscerated in front of a national audience. Not that I was looking for mean-spiritedness, but c'mon, this was the guy that butchered Star Trek V. Shatner got off easy.
posted by mosk at 9:21 PM on August 29, 2006

I don't think I understand the purpose of roasts. From this one, it seems that a roast a series of deliberately racist and sexist statements strung together and spewed forth, with the expectation that someone will find them funny.

Why exactly do roasts need to be so over the top with the offensiveness?
posted by Hildegarde at 9:22 PM on August 29, 2006

I watched most of the roast on Comedy Central and the main sentiment I came away with was "I wish Andy Dick wasn't there." Check out the Takei clip to see what I mean.
posted by PhatLobley at 9:29 PM on August 29, 2006

Betty White saying cock ring. I think that was the most jarring thing I've ever seen.
posted by SirOmega at 9:30 PM on August 29, 2006

Why exactly do roasts need to be so over the top with the offensiveness?

It's all they have left.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 9:33 PM on August 29, 2006

I thought Artie Lange was very good.
posted by JakeWalker at 9:53 PM on August 29, 2006

"Betty White's so old, the first game show she was on ... the grand prize was 'fire'."

hehhehehe-he
posted by RavinDave at 2:33 AM on August 30, 2006

I agree with SirOmega. Betty White KILLED, but that was a bit... jarring really is the only word. Greg Giraldo, wtf? You can't even memorize a minute and a half of one liners? Although his overacting joke was good. Andy Dick running around licking people was a bit tired.
posted by antifuse at 4:57 AM on August 30, 2006

In real life he writes train wrecks like this.

But he also writes stuff like this: Shatner - Has Been (embedded audio player). That album is all kinds of awesome.
posted by Roger Dodger at 5:29 AM on August 30, 2006

Betty White saying cock ring. I think that was the most jarring thing I've ever seen.

You should see Lake Placid then. She calls police officers of the law "Officer Fuckmeat" and "Cocksuckers! You're all cocksuckers!"

Also there is a large crocogator what chomps various people, animals, and inanimate objects.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 6:09 AM on August 30, 2006

Any random five minutes of Betty White on the Mary Tyler Moore Show is 100 times better than her forcing a laugh by saying "cock ring."

These roasts are simply opportunities for celebs to finally say in public what they say in private. Still, hearing them say it about Shatner was funny. Thanks for the FPP.
posted by ?! at 7:03 AM on August 30, 2006

Oswalt was one of my favorite. It's good to see an actual geek roasting Kirk.
posted by johndog at 2:59 PM on August 30, 2006