Horror movies aren't just for Halloween:
Silent Night, Bloody Night,
Black Christmas,
To All A Good Night,
Christmas Evil (starring
Fiona Apple's dad as a homicidal Santa),
Gremlins (in which Phoebe Cates learns
there is no Santa Claus),
Silent Night, Deadly Night (which inspired Parts
2,
3,
4, and
5 despite--or perhaps because of--denunciations by
Siskel & Ebert and
parents' groups),
Elves, and
Jack Frost
posted by jonp72
on Dec 4, 2012 -
36 comments
A sub-directorate of the Bureau of Special Christmas Operations (BOSCO),
Santa's Little Secret Service is an Elvish security agency with the primary mission of ensuring the safety of Santa, Mrs. Claus and other high-value Christmas persons. The Service is separated into
divisions focusing on personal protection, diplomatic protection, intelligence, and Christmas certainty operations.
When not protecting Santa, LSS can found assisting in protection of other high-value, Holiday persons, such as the
Easter Bunny and
Jesus with the help of their unique
Candy Cane weapons.
posted by Brandon Blatcher
on Dec 10, 2011 -
16 comments
This Christmas Eve spare a thought for the Chrildren of Iceland, who will be suffering a traumatising visit from
Kertasníkir, or "Candle Beggar", the thirteenth and final of the strange and somewhat sinister Icelandic Santas, or Yule lads, who are the childre of the ogress
Gryla. Most of them don't seem to care if you've been bad or good - mainly they want to steal your food and wreck stuff.
[more inside]
posted by Artw
on Dec 24, 2010 -
27 comments
Abandoned in a hat in the middle of a snowdrift as a newborn, rescued by a woodsman and guarded by a lioness, stolen and raised by a wood nymph, instructed in the ways of all the languages of the animals as a child, on the threshold of manhood he visited medieval Europe, feudal Japan, and Arabian markets to learn the inherent evil of humanity. For his insistence on toymaking, he was terrorized and repeatedly captured by a race determined to corrupt young minds, until his immortal protector came out to defend him with a laser-shooting axe which eradicated the malevolent culture. But can that same protector defend his ward's life to the likes of the Commander of the Wind Demons? The Life and Adventures of Santa Clause, a Rankin/Bass production, Part
[1] [2] [3] [4] [5].
posted by Navelgazer
on Dec 7, 2009 -
45 comments
Penguins With Angst is the visual tale of a group of hoodlum penguins who vandalize a grain silo & threaten the life of Santa Claus.
Easter Sacrifice is a photostory of the kidnapping of the Easter Bunny & his eventual decapitation by the Dove of Peace. Both art projects courtesy of
Exclusionary, the online gallery of Jasper Thomas' work.
posted by jonson
on Dec 17, 2006 -
10 comments
The Real Story of Christmas ...Many who are excitedly preparing for their Christmas celebrations would prefer not knowing about the holiday’s real significance. If they do know the history, they often object that their celebration has nothing to do with the holiday’s monstrous history and meaning. “We are just having fun.”
posted by NorthernSky
on Dec 17, 2005 -
68 comments
Ho Ho Waaaahhhh!! A lot of kids don't like standing in long lines. A lot of kids don't like strangers (especially ones with big fake beards who are laughing dementedly). A lot of kids don't like having their pictures taken. Put them all together, and you've got the nightmare of the Kid's Photo With Santa, some unfortunate results of which are immortalized in the Scared Of Santa Photo Gallery. (Link is to #2, which is my favorite.)
posted by Kat Allison
on Dec 18, 2004 -
56 comments
No Xmas in U.S. this year:
Santa on Fed's "No Fly" list. Okay, that's just "
News" from the website of satiric rockers
Bah and the Humbugs, skewering Xmas since 1985. MP3s of the entirety of this year's CD
Farhenheit 12/25 are available
on the website, or you can buy the CD for $10 and all ten sheckles go to the
UN World Food Programme. More tracks
here, including the "Jolly Roger the Xmas Pirate" series and "Free the Reindeer. " Great stuff for that awkward holiday family get-together, where the music won't offend but the
cool lyrics can keep you chuckling to yourself all night.
posted by Shane
on Dec 17, 2004 -
4 comments
Have a merry, sex and gadget filled hyper-commercialized Japanese Christmas. "Well it all started when a Spanish Jesuit missionary named St. Francis Xavier brought Christmas to Japan in 1549...." The
Jesuit bid to
Christianize Japan was a flop though, and now - while Jews in the West, for example, tend to go out for Chinese food on Christmas Eve, the Japanese had little connection to the Christian version - so they invented their own! Syncretistic Japan pulls in random elements of Western "Christmas" and recombines in pleasing new ways! ( shocking only to Christians ). Santa Claus on the Cross and more!
A proper Christmas in Japan - for singles - involves a hot date and visit to a "Love Hotel" where
"you might be directed by scantily-clad female elves to rooms complete with Christmas trees and life-size reindeer watching the proceedings with interest." and
"Grope Free Commutes", for Japanese women tired of having their asses grabbed on the subway by drunk salarymen returning from "Forget the Year" parties.
This fine blog chronicles it all: " the Dolphin-and-fish-surrounded Christmas tree", Ukelele Christmas parties - "I wandered into a score of middle aged Japanese ladies wearing Hawaiian shirts and plastic lays, tuning up their ukuleles" and more. And don't forget to buy some
cool new
gadgets.
"...a tiny robot helicopter weighing less than 9 grams... "
posted by troutfishing
on Dec 25, 2003 -
19 comments
Santa lays off elves "Something will definitely be missing this Christmas." said Milja Vilmila, who was told her job as an elf helping Santa no longer existed.
posted by drezdn
on Dec 20, 2003 -
6 comments
Sober Santa. Too much politics today, not enough Christmas fun. Here's a drunk Santa game from b3ta. Pretty tough once you get going.
posted by Stan Chin
on Dec 12, 2003 -
12 comments
The world's most wanted man has embarked on his annual breaking-and-entering spree! Stop him before he reaches your house, using the power of NORAD. Track him as he wends his way around the world...(see! Missile-defense technology IS good for something!)
posted by amberglow
on Dec 24, 2002 -
14 comments
Twas the night before Xmas and all through the net,
The geeks would be googling the ascii character set;
Metafilter refreshed on their PCs with care,
In the hopes that their FPP soon would be there;
Then up in the blue there arose such a clatter,
Mathowie sprang up to see what's the matter;
When, what to my wondering eyes there should be,
The canonical list of "Twas" parodies.
posted by Wet Spot
on Dec 22, 2002 -
11 comments
Santa Rampage! Last weekend a horde of Santa's wreaked havoc on Washington DC's clubs, bars and adult establishments. Amazingly only one santa was decked in the entire evening.
posted by cpfeifer
on Dec 14, 2002 -
20 comments
Santa Claus, elusive jolly old elf, has finally been located by someone curious enough (in both senses of the word) to use FedEx to track him down. (The page I linked to here only tells half the story; click that link down on the left to get FedEx's tracking page.)
posted by wanderingmind
on Dec 6, 2002 -
20 comments
Magic 8 Ball Santa Witness the jiggling fat man! This couldn't wait for a Friday humor post. I've asked questions like:
Will that cute brunette ever return my call? Will the Cincinnati Bengals go undefeated next year? Oh those lonely times at work...Huzzah!
posted by lheiskell
on Dec 5, 2002 -
18 comments
Sober Santa . Too much politics today, not enough Christmas fun. Here's a drunk Santa game from b3ta. Pretty tough once you get going.
posted by Stan Chin
on Dec 3, 2002 -
14 comments
Secret Santa. Previously mentioned
here, a year ago.
"Got your own Web site? Got an Amazon wishlist? If the answer to both of these is yes, and you like the idea of giving and receiving, you should definitely sign up." Well, it's that time of year again.
posted by crunchland
on Nov 15, 2002 -
14 comments
Project SANTA This game wasted a good two hours at work yesterday. It's a flash game, but with 70's gaming appeal.
I played it so much I finally found the
easter egg, supposedly the site of its "creator." It's on level three, click the moon. A
Christmas game with an
Easter egg, I dunno.
posted by lheiskell
on Dec 15, 2001 -
2 comments
Kansas City's Secret Santa has been handing out cash in hundred-dollar bills to needy individuals and random people during the Christmas season for the past
twenty-one years. He's completely anonymous, preferring to give joy without getting any credit. He tries to find people with specific needs and surprises them in their homes or at their jobs with the cash they need. He gives out well over ten thousand dollars every year.
posted by daveadams
on Dec 22, 2000 -
11 comments
