As the (northern hemisphere) summer rapidly disappears, the nights draw in and temperatures plummet, so the English are Christmas shopping. Seasonal foods appear on shelves, while the Selfridges Christmas store is now open and big supermarkets flag the approaching holiday. At Harrods, the Christmas range has been launched, while in Derbyshire Christmas pudding production is ramping up, and inns and hotels in towns such as Durham compete for Christmas Day meal bookings. For shoppers too impatient to wait, the 2014 British video game "Christmas Shopper Simulator" (play through). Days to go.
Looking for a gift under $20? $15? $10? Maybe you just want to know where all the shit you can afford on Amazon or ThinkGeek is hiding. We've all been there: a birthday or wedding coming up and no clue what gift to buy. Maybe your family disowned you after the last Secret Santa (and you were so sure that Heifer International donation was the way to go!), but 2014 is your year to shine.
Forget the pony, forget the teddy bear -- this kid wants a little thing that can turn into anything at anytime.
"This year, Americans are planning to spend over $400 on Christmas gifts. Instead of buying things we can’t afford, here’s a way to do something more meaningful." Via
I pledge to buy handmade this holiday season, and request that others do the same for me. Why? Better gifting experience, better ethics, better for the environment.
Upside-Down Christmas Trees - Demand is growing. The media seems to have caught on to the trend...playing right into the hands of the sellers. Get yours today (if they haven't already sold out), for a mere $599.95. On one hand, it seems like a good space-saving idea. On the other, how much more commercial can Christmas get? "Target has three such upside-down trees on its website, touting their best attribute: 'Leaves more room on the floor for gifts!'"
The perfect Christmas gift for the geek in your life. Or maybe you need something for your new niece or nephew? Then again, this site may have all the stuff on your gift shopping list.
Need some help with your Christmas shopping? How about a nice Penis cravat? That special lady in your life will be sure to love her Possum Fur G-string. And finally, something to stuff that stocking: The Bulge.
No shopping. No presents. No guilt.
A quick flash movie, to help relieve the stress and tension of last minute holiday shopping. In with the good air, out with the bad air, rinse and repeat. After all is said and done, you can get back to enjoying the holidays in the company of your friends and/or family.
Just in time for Christmas! Shop for scrotums. Get yourself a bull penis walking stick. Spoil your dog with bull penis chew treats. (Go for the 24" ones, if only for the jealousy factor)
Happy Thanksgiving or Is It? In 1939, Franklin Delano Roosevelt responed to pressure from the National Retail Dry Goods Association to move the official date of Thanksgiving back one week to the next-to-last Thursday of the month. FDR hoped that this would enliven the economy by adding one week to the Christmas shopping season, but he received considerable political flak for tampering with what many viewed as a sacred religious holiday. (Thanksgiving is considered sacred even though it only became a national holiday due to lobbying by the editor of a 19th century woman's magazine.) New Deal-era Republicans were especially bothered by the calendar change and one essayist at the American Enterprise Institute still seems to carry a grudge. Congress later resolved the issue by passing a resolution in 1941 that designated Thanksgiving as the fourth Thursday of November.
Fun Gifts. The Season for Giving is soon upon us. The web contains a colorful collection of odd but interesting gifts. Some particular favorites include: sushi jewelry, Klein bottle hats and glassware, Zanti Misfits, and Homer Simpson's Rubik's cubes. (Note for sale yet is the ever-popular Matrioshka Brain.) What fun and strange gifts have you found in your peripatetic searches of the web? What fun gift would you most like to receive?
No shopping, no presents, no guilt! End compulsory consumption by resisting xmas. It's never too early to start campaigning for next year.