Recently I overheard a man say at a yoga class, "Yeah, well, you get two women together and it's like bitch central." I could have told him he only needed one, in fact, and that would be me, but it also made me realize how much people diminish and poo-poo the real power and strength of female friendship, especially between women, which is either supposed to descend into some kind of male lesbian love scene porn fantasy or be dismissed as meaningless or be re-written as a story of competition.
Transformation and Transcendence: The Power of Female Friendship
Here's the truth: friendships between women are often the deepest and most profound love stories, but they are often discussed as if they are ancillary, "bonus" relationships to the truly important ones. Women's friendships outlast jobs, parents, husbands, boyfriends, lovers, and sometimes children.
, an essay by Emily Rapp
posted by divined by radio
on Aug 5, 2014 -
Lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender rights around the world
Being lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender is illegal in almost 80 countries, and in at least five of them is still punishable by death. Ahead of the International day against homophobia and transphobia on 17 May, explore the legal situation for LGBT people around sex, marriage or civil partnerships, adoption, workplace discrimination and hate crime by region, country and overall population.
posted by michswiss
on May 16, 2014 -
"I often think about my long-ago friend, and I wonder what happened to her,"
wrote children's author Eric Carle in his book "Friends"
, published last year, inspired by his friendship, as a 3-year-old, with a young girl growing up in Syracuse, New York. He did not know her name, just that that she was the daughter of Italian immigrants. Last Sunday, over 80 years after he last saw her, he and his long-lost friend, Florence Ciani Trovato, reconnected.
posted by beryllium
on Apr 22, 2014 -
Just in time for Valentine's Day, Scarleteen launches rad e-cards
for "hookups or friends with benefits, open or poly relationships, friendships, sexually exclusive relationships, exes turned friends, and even the love relationship one has with oneself." Art by Isabella Rotman
posted by DarlingBri
on Feb 9, 2014 -
Until this point,
your friendships happened through a vague combination of forced institutional socializing, classes, sports and booze. None of your friends can remember exactly how they became friends with each other. But now you are an adult, and now that friend-making is a conscious act, you realize you don’t know how to do it.
posted by showbiz_liz
on Jul 1, 2013 -
Friendship is Optimal
is not a "My Little Pony" fanfic, but a SF story that starts with a procedurally-generated MLP MMO, and crescendos to what could very well be the Best Possible Outcome if self-optimizing algorithms are given /almost/ the right goals.
Some readers are horrified by the implications; some want to move into "Equestria Online" anyway. Whichever camp you fall in, you'll never forget the phrase "satisfy human values through friendship and ponies".
posted by DataPacRat
on Nov 28, 2012 -
In my unending search for just the right vintage images for our articles, I have looked through thousands of photographs of men from the last century or so. One of the things that I have found most fascinating about many of these images, is the ease, familiarity, and intimacy, which men used to exhibit in photographs with their friends and compadres. Male Affection: A Photographic History Tour
posted by byanyothername
on Aug 13, 2012 -
In "Friends of a Certain Age
," the New York Times Style Section
examines how life stages affect friendship, citing the college years as America's prime friendship-making time. Why? Because as we get older and "external conditions change, it becomes tougher to meet the three conditions that sociologists since the 1950s have considered crucial to making close friends: proximity; repeated, unplanned interactions; and a setting that encourages people to let their guard down and confide in each other." [more inside]
posted by Violet Blue
on Jul 15, 2012 -
Rather than trying to tame wild stallions, fearless Costa Rican fisherman Chito preferred a playful wrestle in the water with his best pal Pocho - a deadly 17ft crocodile
. For several years, the 52-year-old daredevil drew gasps of amazement from onlookers by wading chest-deep into the water
, then whistling for his 980lb buddy - and giving him an affectionate hug. Crazy Chito said: "Poncho is my best friend. This is a very dangerous routine but we have a good relationship. He will look me in the eye and not attack me. It is too dangerous
for anyone else to come in the water. It is only ever the two of us.
Sadly Pocho died last October
, at the age of 50. But his fame lives on.
posted by unSane
on Jun 25, 2012 -
Have a seizure.
The non-disabled can have a lot of trouble coming to grips with a friend's disability, especially if it's something that doesn't show up well from the outside. As the writer puts it, "... she knows I have MS, but she's never actually seen my disease, and there are miles between those two things." There are a whole host of bad ways for someone to react to seeing the disease. And then there are the good ones.
posted by MShades
on Apr 20, 2012 -
is a powerful and touching comic from artist Katie O’Neill, which looks at loneliness, wishes, and what we might really need more than a white knight to come along and rescue us. [more inside]
posted by quin
on Mar 5, 2012 -
Deadspin tells the story
of the unlikely friendship between Kendrick Perkins of the Oklahoma City Thunder and two fans.
posted by reenum
on Apr 22, 2011 -
Children Full of Life
- grade 4 students in Kanazawa, Japan learn deep life lessons from their incredible teacher and from each other. I strongly recommend this as awesome, but one caveat: keep tissues handy. (5 parts, 40 minutes total, English)
posted by madamjujujive
on Jul 25, 2009 -
Going on a "Man Date" (NYT link, reg. required).
Two (presumably) heterosexual guys who knew each other from college go to the museum and dinner without partners -- and apparently this qualifies as a "man date," although (again presumably) there's no kiss at the end of the night or promises to call the next day. Maybe I'm cranky, but back in my day, we simply called this "spending time with a friend" and didn't plaster a thin veneer of gay panic/defensive het rationalization on it. Is the social behavior of straight males now so circumscribed that a guy having one-on-one time with a male friend outside a bar or sporting merits an article in the NYT?
posted by jscalzi
on Apr 9, 2005 -
what do you call your circle of friends?
Two years ago, Ethan Watters wrote an article
in the NY Times Sunday Magazine, covering the current phenomenon amongst adults who are marrying late, waiting for the 'right one', and using an extended social circle to fill the need for intimacy and emotional support that has been traditionally provided by a marriage. He has expanded the topic into a book
covering groups of friends that have the characteristics of 'an urban tribe' bound by a shared culture of inside jokes, origin myths and communal rituals. Does this apply to your social set? Do you have a Yahoogroup
or a Friendster
bulletin board that is used to plan movie nights, pubcrawls or group vacations? Does introducing a new romantic partner
to your friends feel more stressful than introducing them to your family? Conversely, do you need a chart
to track who has dated whom, who has slept with whom, and who has had more than their fair share of drunken hookups? Or is this all one man's conflated introspection of his extended bachelorship?
posted by bl1nk
on Oct 9, 2003 -