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Child Bride Mother

In Guatemala, the legal age of marriage is 14 with parental consent, but in Petén, in the northern part of the country, the law seems to be more of a suggestion. Underage brides are everywhere. They parade endlessly through Petén’s hospital in San Benito, seeking medical care. Most have traveled from the villages along the mud-soaked roads that flow out in all directions. I visited almost a dozen of these villages to meet some of the child brides of Petén for the latest Too Young to Wed transmedia project, this one a partnership with the United Nations Population Fund. Guatemala was the 10th country I had worked in documenting the issue of child marriage since 2003, after a chance encounter with several young brides in Afghanistan.
posted by josher71 on Feb 10, 2015 - 4 comments

... and Alabama makes 37.

It's marriage day in Alabama. The Supreme Court refused to stay the marriage equality decision in Alabama, and couples started to marry today (lots of amazing adorable pictures throughout). [more inside]
posted by joycehealy on Feb 9, 2015 - 88 comments

“Writing is not a linear process. It’s all work. This is work.”

Put On Some Pants and Get Out: Writing a Book Without Destroying a Marriage by Brian Stavely
posted by Fizz on Jan 30, 2015 - 22 comments

The Myth of the Gay Community

"I am the gay community that many people think of, that gets to have its voice heard, who considers the prospect of marriage. But it certainly doesn’t end with me." (SL Atlantic)
posted by roomthreeseventeen on Jan 30, 2015 - 19 comments

"I don't want you to hate me, and I don't want you to disown me."

Oklahoma. This was a place where Kathryn's workplace had a cussing jar, a quarter per swear, and the words written on it, “Let Go and Let God.” Here, Christianity was the religion — Tracy and Kathryn were believers — and Oklahoma football was the religion — Tracy and Kathryn were believers — and people could be decent and kind and judgmental, sometimes all at once, which was why, when Tracy told some Rotary Club friends that she and Kathryn were getting married, she kept her eyes planted above their heads so she wouldn't have to look at their faces.

posted by Rhaomi on Jan 24, 2015 - 70 comments

Another one bites the dust

“If anything, Alabama’s prohibition of same-sex marriage detracts from its goal of promoting optimal environments for children,” U.S. District Court Judge Callie V. S. Granade wrote in a brief 10-page opinion, concluding, “[T]he court finds that Alabama’s marriage laws violate the Due Process Clause and Equal Protection Clause of the Fourteenth Amendment to the United States Constitution.”
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering on Jan 23, 2015 - 65 comments

Being Buddhist, Being Gay — George Takei

When the Supreme Court of the State of California ruled for marriage equality in 2008, we seized the opportunity. Having founded the Japanese American National Museum (I’m still a trustee on the Board there), we wanted to have our wedding there, in the “Democracy Forum” building. It was, after all, democracy that made our formal union possible. And Brad too had embraced Buddhism by now, so it could be a Buddhist wedding. We chose Rev. Briones of the Nishi Hongwanji Temple to be our officiant because he personifies Buddhism’s diversity, being that he’s a Mexican American Buddhist minister.
[more inside]
posted by Elementary Penguin on Jan 14, 2015 - 19 comments

The failure of My Husband's Not Gay is one of style, not substance.

The Profound Lack of Empathy in "My Husband's Not Gay" [more inside]
posted by roomthreeseventeen on Jan 12, 2015 - 111 comments

I want to feel what he feels

A Sunni-Shia Love Story Imperiled by al Qaeda (by Ruth Michaelson).
Sabrine and her soldier husband managed to marry against all odds, including her family’s wrath. Now, their love story faces an even bigger threat—his abduction by the Nusra Front.

posted by Golden Eternity on Dec 26, 2014 - 3 comments

Miami, Miami, you've got style....

On August 21, a federal judge in Florida ruled that that the state's ban on same sex marriage was unconstitutional, but the ruling was stayed until January 5. Although the state Attorney General appealed the ruling and asked for a further stay, both the 11th circuit, and os of last night the Supreme Court have denied the appeal, and Florida will become the 36th marriage equality state on January 6th. [more inside]
posted by roomthreeseventeen on Dec 20, 2014 - 36 comments

Half of all marriages - oh, wait

"It is no longer true that the divorce rate is rising, or that half of all marriages end in divorce. It has not been for some time. Despite hand-wringing about the institution of marriage, marriages in this country are stronger today than they have been in a long time. The divorce rate peaked in the 1970s and early 1980s and has been declining for the three decades since." [more inside]
posted by showbiz_liz on Dec 2, 2014 - 95 comments

Marry someone who will take care of the kids

It’s Not Your Kids Holding Your Career Back. It’s Your Husband. A new study of Harvard Business School graduates found that high-achieving women are not meeting the career goals because they’re allowing their partners’ careers to take precedence over their own. This echos earlier advice by Xerox CEO Ursula Burns to "marry down" someone who will take care of the kids.
posted by mooselini on Nov 20, 2014 - 105 comments

Dum Spiro Spero

South Carolina saw its first same-sex marriages today, in Charleston. The first license was issued to Colleen Condon and Nichols Bleckley; the first ceremony saw Kayla Bennett and Kristin Anderson married (vine). Licenses were issued last month, but a stay was issued by the state Supreme Court after a move by the governor and attorney general. An order by 4th circuit judge Richard Gergel yesterday was not stayed. [more inside]
posted by ftm on Nov 19, 2014 - 30 comments

The map is about to meet in the middle

The Supreme Court has lifted the stay preventing same-sex marriage in Kansas; meantime, South Carolina is stayed until November 20th. [more inside]
posted by joycehealy on Nov 13, 2014 - 14 comments

Here's a box of chocolates; it is your duty to eat them.

People like order in their lives. This does not go down well with those who feel that social restraints of any sort are a bad thing, but these people are a distinct, if very noisy, minority. Most of us want social rules of some sort – not oppressive ones, of course – but rules that govern the way we conduct ourselves towards others. We want people to queue correctly.

We like it when people don’t chew with their mouth open. We love it – although we may be cowed into not saying this – when an able-bodied person gives up a seat to somebody who is clearly frailer. Personally, I like it when anybody gives up a seat on a train to anybody else, frail or not. (Novelist Alexander McCall Smith discusses Jane Austen's Emma in The Daily Mail.)
posted by joseph conrad is fully awesome on Nov 11, 2014 - 35 comments

The circuit split.

Today, by a 2-1 decision, the Sixth Circuit upheld the same-sex marriage bans in Ohio, Kentucky, Tennessee and Michigan. reversing a federal district court decision and creating a circuit split: the Sixth Circuit has upheld bans, while the Fourth, Seventh, and Tenth Circuits have struck them down. [more inside]
posted by roomthreeseventeen on Nov 6, 2014 - 67 comments

The health of the people should be the supreme law

Missouri state court judge Rex M. Burlison has ruled that Missouri cannot keep St. Louis officials from marrying same sex couples. [more inside]
posted by roomthreeseventeen on Nov 5, 2014 - 18 comments

Marriage Equality in the Equality State

At 10AM Mountain Time on Tuesday, October 21, Wyoming began issuing marriage licenses to same-sex couples. The U.S. Supreme Court had announced its decision to "let stand appeals court rulings allowing same-sex marriage in five states," including Wyoming, on October 6—16 years since gay college student Matthew Shepard was abducted, tortured, and left to die outside Laramie, WY, in a homophobic attack that galvanized LGBT activism across the country. The Matthew Shepard Foundation posted today: "Congratulations, Wyoming. Thirty-two down, 18 to go." [Previously: The 10-year anniversary of Matthew Shepard's death.]
posted by nicebookrack on Oct 21, 2014 - 19 comments

Arizona gay marriage legal; couples to marry immediately

"...there is no 'gay exception' to our U.S. Constitution's guarantees of liberty and equality for all, including the freedom to celebrate love, commitment, and family with the person of one's choice in marriage."
posted by MrVisible on Oct 17, 2014 - 84 comments

Marriage advice for chart enthusiasts

What makes for a stable marriage?
About a decade ago, the gossip on everyone’s lips was that “1/2 of all marriages in the U.S. end in divorce.” That factoid was later disproven, but it left a lasting impression on the eligible bachelors and bachelorettes of America. In an effort to not become a part of that statistic, I started doing a little research on what makes for a stable marriage in America. [...] What struck me about this study is that it basically laid out what makes for a stable marriage in the U.S. I’ve highlighted 7 of the biggest factors below.
The Atlantic points out:
Part of the study echoes what we already know about marriage: That it's increasingly for rich people—who make a lot and can afford honeymoons.
[more inside]
posted by almostmanda on Oct 16, 2014 - 114 comments

Denied.

This morning, the Supreme Court denied cert petitions in all seven same-sex marriage cases that had been brought to the SCOTUS level. [more inside]
posted by roomthreeseventeen on Oct 6, 2014 - 213 comments

"You've been cockblocked by Zeus, stupid boy, she says. "

"He makes love to her, his first time with a woman, but she's not really a woman—is a woman, then a man, then his exact double, then a peacock, feathers alluringly erect. " Rumaan Alam's "Scene From A Marriage" imagines the domestic bliss of Zeus and Hera and assorted boytoys.
posted by The Whelk on Oct 2, 2014 - 7 comments

A Post About Buzzfeed and Tinder? Just, Ew, No. Moving On

A Buzzfeed writer exercises her semiotics and gathers a bunch of stock photos to recreate Tinder, the quick glance social dating app, to find out why we swipe. [more inside]
posted by notyou on Sep 12, 2014 - 47 comments

The Sexual Outlaw At 83

83 year old Chicano author John Rechy (City Of Night, The Sexual Outlaw, Rushes) talks to Lambda Literary about gay assimilation, being mistaken for white, melding truth and fiction, the post-Stonewall peroid, and hating the word 'queer.'
posted by The Whelk on Sep 10, 2014 - 20 comments

Lock up your wives!

The long and fairly disturbing history of the "Can This Marriage Be Saved?" feature of Ladies' Home Journal.
posted by Chrysostom on Sep 9, 2014 - 55 comments

Alternate reality photos of her life as a married woman

Staging lives: "Who do you want to be? Or, more accurately, who could you have been? Czech photographer Dita Pepe takes these musings quite literally, re-imaging her life in a hundred different scenarios in her series Self Portraits with Men. Pepe’s photographs are disarming in their nonchalant subtly, the artist possessing an uncanny ability to become a seamless member of each family." [more inside]
posted by Salamandrous on Aug 29, 2014 - 27 comments

“It’s a matter of indifference to you?”

What's better than reading a judge ruthlessly dismantling arguments against marriage equality? Hearing the judge's own voice as he makes lawyers arguing for Indiana's and Wisconsin's bans on same-sex marriage look like fools. Previously.
posted by ogooglebar on Aug 27, 2014 - 97 comments

How We F*** Now

BuzzFeed LGBT editor Saeed Jones joins journalists Steven Thrasher and Dave Tuller to discuss sex, gay men, and what we are (and aren’t) doing. (SL Buzzfeed)
posted by roomthreeseventeen on Jul 30, 2014 - 37 comments

Virginia is for Lovers

The 4th Circuit Court of Appeals upholds the decision overturning Virginia's ban on Same sex marriage:
"We recognize that same-sex marriage makes some people deeply uncomfortable. However, inertia and apprehension are not legitimate bases for denying same-sex couples due process and equal protection of the laws. Civil marriage is one of the cornerstones of our way of life. It allows individuals to celebrate and publicly declare their intentions to form lifelong partnerships, which provide unparalleled intimacy, companionship, emotional support, and security. The choice of whether and whom to marry is an intensely personal decision that alters the course of an individual’s life. Denying same-sex couples this choice prohibits them from participating fully in our society, which is precisely the type of segregation that the Fourteenth Amendment cannot countenance."
[more inside]
posted by peeedro on Jul 29, 2014 - 87 comments

...is what brings us together, today.

Misleading on Marriage: how gay marriage opponents twist history to suit their agenda - "Much of what you hear about the purpose of marriage is ahistorical. Lisa L. Spangenberg on what the institution was traditionally fit for."
As someone in a same-sex relationship, I followed arguments for and against the overturn of DOMA with some interest. As a medievalist, my attention was particularly caught by arguments against DOMA on Twitter and elsewhere that asserted that Christianity and history unilaterally agreed that marriage means one woman and one man and coitus. This simply isn't historically accurate even within the context of Christianity and European history.

posted by the man of twists and turns on Jul 24, 2014 - 47 comments

"wait for a bunch of old ideas to die in order for a church to live"

A Church Divided Over Marriage Equality
The Church’s rules against homosexuality have divided Methodists for forty years. Attempts to abolish or even soften these rules have failed at every General Conference, the quadrennial meeting of the denomination, since they were first added, in 1972, to the Book of Discipline, which contains the Church’s laws and doctrine.

"And They Will Know We Are Christians by Our Love"
"Methodists should call meeting on gay divide, pastor says"
"Ranks of defiant United Methodist clergy rise"
"Defrocking of Minister Widens Split Over Gays"
posted by davidstandaford on Jul 23, 2014 - 22 comments

"it is wise to be appropriately pessimistic here"

How we end up marrying the wrong people [more inside]
posted by flex on Jul 18, 2014 - 55 comments

And now it's Florida \o/

Monroe County Circuit Judge, Luis Garcia, has ruled that a provision in the Florida Constitution that outlaws same-sex marriage violates the U.S. Constitution. [more inside]
posted by Sophie1 on Jul 17, 2014 - 71 comments

"Can you deal with the fact that I'm not in love with you?"

Without You I'm Nothing: The Believer looks at the memoirs of the wives and girlfriends of rock stars.
posted by The Whelk on Jul 4, 2014 - 20 comments

The Fox, The Madien, The River, And The Witch

Leigh Bardugo writes haunting, Eastern-European inspired fairy tales (Previously) often highlighting the experience of women in a unfair world. Tor.com presents two new stories, the somber "The Too-Clever Fox" and the subversive "Little Knife."
posted by The Whelk on Jul 1, 2014 - 8 comments

"the fact that your Indian parents have fallen in American love"

The Arranged Marriage That Ended Happily Ever After: How My Parents Fell In Love, 30 Years Later
posted by the man of twists and turns on Jun 30, 2014 - 36 comments

Peter and Patricia picked a peck of perfect partners

How to Pick a Life Partner. From afar, a great marriage is a sweeping love story, like a marriage in a book or a movie. And that’s a nice, poetic way to look at a marriage as a whole. But human happiness doesn’t function in sweeping strokes, because we don’t live in broad summations—we’re stuck in the tiny unglamorous folds of the fabric of life, and that’s where our happiness is determined. So if we want to find a happy marriage, we need to think small—we need to look at marriage up close and see that it’s built not out of anything poetic, but out of 20,000 mundane Wednesdays. This is the second of two posts. The first one tells us why we suck at picking life partners. [more inside]
posted by storybored on Jun 27, 2014 - 46 comments

contempt, they found, is the number one factor that tears couples apart

science says lasting relationships come down to—you guessed it—kindness and generosity.
posted by and they trembled before her fury on Jun 17, 2014 - 91 comments

Alan spilled water on me while I was trying to sleep.

Claire Meyer and Alan Linic, a twentysomething couple in Chicago, have been keeping a public record of every fight they have fought since August of 2013.
posted by SkylitDrawl on Jun 6, 2014 - 78 comments

On, Wisconsin

A federal judge has overturned Wisconsin's ban on same sex marriage. [more inside]
posted by roomthreeseventeen on Jun 6, 2014 - 125 comments

"It is at times difficult to see past the shrillness of the debate"

A federal judge in Oregon has overturned that state's ban on same sex marriage, opening the door for couples to begin getting married immediately. (PDF) [more inside]
posted by roomthreeseventeen on May 19, 2014 - 112 comments

The Court finds Idaho’s Marriage Laws unconstitutional

A federal judge in Idaho has issued a ruling (PDF) declaring Idaho's same-sex marriage ban unconstitutional, and today denied Gov. Butch Otter's motion for a stay on her decision overturning Idaho's ban on same-sex marriages. [more inside]
posted by roomthreeseventeen on May 14, 2014 - 96 comments

Can we do that there? Be that here? Check Equaldex.

Equaldex: the collaborative LGBT knowledgebase! A crowd-sourced, verified, beautifully presented representation of equal rights (and how they are specifically denied) for LGBT folks. [via reddit]
posted by batmonkey on May 13, 2014 - 7 comments

How to Stop a Wedding

An illustrated guide. "Enjoy life with your bride or groom. Be aware, however, that you're never guaranteed a storybook ending. Someone who is likely to walk from a wedding may be afraid of commitment, and insecure in relationships. This could pose problems for your relationship."
posted by 912 Greens on May 7, 2014 - 89 comments

"..impale the arms of his husband with his own.."

At long last the College Of Arms has released offical guidelines on the effects of same-sex marriage on heraldry.
posted by The Whelk on May 6, 2014 - 108 comments

Beating the Tinder Game

Blake Jamieson used his marketing background to game Tinder's system.
posted by reenum on Apr 20, 2014 - 65 comments

For Richer Or Poorer

Ask Polly: Will Our Class Differences Tear Us Apart?
I've been with my current boyfriend for three years. We're really great together—similar interests, senses of humor, great sex. I love him so much—the only issue is that of our respective backgrounds. He grew up in a tony suburb, went to prep school, then to a very prestigious college, and finally the very prestigious graduate school where we met. I went to public school in a bad neighborhood, put myself through a not-so-prestigious college, made a name for myself in my field, then got into that same prestigious grad school. Our families could not be more different. I didn't think it would matter so much, but something happened recently that I can't shake.
[more inside]
posted by the man of twists and turns on Apr 12, 2014 - 86 comments

What If Everything You Knew About Poverty Was Wrong?

"A sociologist at Johns Hopkins University, Edin is one of the nation's preeminent poverty researchers. She has spent much of the past several decades studying some of the country's most dangerous, impoverished neighborhoods. But unlike academics who draw conclusions about poverty from the ivory tower, Edin has gotten up close and personal with the people she studies—and in the process has shattered many myths about the poor, rocking sociology and public-policy circles. [more inside]
posted by Bella Donna on Apr 10, 2014 - 114 comments

The Crossroads of America

A federal judge in Indiana has ordered that the state recognize the marriage of Amy Sandler and Niki Quasney. [more inside]
posted by roomthreeseventeen on Apr 10, 2014 - 26 comments

"Here's a tape of our little visit."

In 2000, Conan O'Brien taped a comedy segment at the NYC offices of Foote, Cone & Belding. The premise: take a chainsaw-wielding furniture huckster from Texas, and try to turn him into a star using a top-tier ad campaign. In the segment, Conan is introduced to a team of FCB copywriters, who dutifully come up with an appropriately ridiculous TV ad.
The segment went as planned; Just another remote for Late Night with Conan O'Brien. Little did he know where it would lead. Conan and one of the on-camera copywriters took a shine to each other, and stayed in touch. Two years later, Conan O'Brien and Liza Powel were married. Today they live in Hollywood with their two kids.
In a 2012 interview, Conan told CNN's Piers Morgan: "Somewhere, in the vault at NBC, there's footage of me literally falling for my wife on camera."
Roll the tape.
posted by Silky Slim on Apr 10, 2014 - 46 comments

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