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The ho ho horror, the ho ho horror

in which Patton Oswalt finds the common ground between Rudolph the well known reindeer and Apocalypse Now. [more inside]
posted by philip-random on Dec 23, 2014 - 12 comments

Ho-Ho-Who?

The NORAD Santa tracker began with a typo.
posted by pjern on Dec 23, 2014 - 21 comments

It's A Licensed Character Christmas

For use spreading misery and pain during this holiday season, have a heaping shovelful of bad bad 80s Chrismas cartoon specials. Hail Grinch!
He-Man & She-Ra's Christmas Special (YouTube 44m)
Christmas Comes To Pac-Land (Dailymotion 23m)
The Wacky 12 Days of Christmas (YouTube 24m) (with Phil Hartman)
And the one that inspired this post, the amazing Deck the Halls with Wacky Walls (YouTube 23m) That is to say, the Wacky Wallwalker Christmas Special. Written by Mark Evanier!
After the break... TWENTY-ONE MORE OF THESE THINGS. You're welcome! [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Dec 13, 2014 - 60 comments

Killing the Magic

When a grown woman and her seventy-something mother engage in yearly debates about the existence of Santa, I think we can agree: there’s a problem. Of course, my mother believes the problem is mine, while I tag her as the source of the annual angst. But who’s telling this story?
posted by internet fraud detective squad, station number 9 on Dec 9, 2014 - 17 comments

Do not send anymore cats, we have enough cats

The popular and venerable Twitter account Tweets Of Old continues its seasonal tradition of posting late 19th century /early 20th century children's letters to Santa.
posted by The Whelk on Dec 8, 2014 - 59 comments

La Santa Cecilia's "El Hielo"

El Hielo by La Santa Cecilia [more inside]
posted by Dip Flash on Mar 5, 2014 - 1 comment

A Gift To You

As the Christmas season winds down, but before New Year plunges a stake into its Dracula Corpse to end it, enjoy Matt Fraction, Maggie Serota and the War Rocket Ajax crew challening each other to create the worst Christmas mixtape. Not interested in audio format banter and such? There is a Youtube Playlist. WARNING: Mostly offensive for aesthetic reasons but there are some other terribles in there as well.
posted by Artw on Dec 27, 2013 - 34 comments

Santa? Let me tell you about Santa.

The Blade Runner Holiday Special (SLYT)
posted by Aznable on Dec 25, 2013 - 36 comments

Christmas is Go

Christmas Control to Thunderbird 3 [more inside]
posted by philip-random on Dec 24, 2013 - 11 comments

Who wouldn't go?

Special Santa! Special Santa! Special Santas!
posted by ThePinkSuperhero on Dec 23, 2013 - 27 comments

Sitting On Knees

For 34 Years, two brothers have had thier picture taken with Santa.
posted by The Whelk on Dec 19, 2013 - 28 comments

Photoshop can make you into an ideal image, for the holidays

"Ad agencies go to disturbing lengths to create the perfect image. Guess we're no different." Victors&Spoils takes the "regular woman to ad-agency image" video (info) a (seasonal) step further.
posted by filthy light thief on Dec 18, 2013 - 6 comments

A well needed refresh for the Santa brand

*Santa* is the industry standard for child-centric gift-delivery solutions
posted by rolo on Dec 9, 2013 - 53 comments

That is not an exhaustive list, but it’s exhausting.

A collective narrative of trying to make it on $17,000 a year: bargaining testimony from a UCSC student-worker
We make only $17,000 a year. We make only $17,000 a year in a town where almost that entire paycheck goes to rent. So today I’m going to talk about how academic workers try to get by on $17,000 a year.
posted by andoatnp on Oct 30, 2013 - 54 comments

Santa, I've Got Your Number...

A few days early for Christmas in July: take a famous '80s song sung from the viewpoint of a stalker who's lost all sense of normalcy and boundaries, fixated on a poor woman whose phone number was written by someone on a bathroom wall. Then make it about Santa.
posted by WCityMike on Jun 27, 2013 - 23 comments

The Quest for the Mantle of Wonder Woman

I carefully analyzed the situation.  Wonder Woman’s powers were magical.  If I wanted to get magical powers, I would need to go on a quest to a magical being and get them.  It would be dangerous.  I would have to prove my worth and my sincerity.  I would be tested, but I was ready.  And I knew exactly which magical being to approach.  It was less than two months to Christmas.  I would go see Santa Claus.
posted by bac on Dec 24, 2012 - 19 comments

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY! ...RHAOMI! ...VERSUS... RHYTHM! ...BEGIN!!!

Since it debuted on the blue in '11 // Epic Rap Battles of History preppin' // to score itself more than a billion views // and become TopDog of the pack YouTube
Made by NicePeter and EpicLloyd // (two improv comics by Maker employed) // The series pits icons of legend renowned // in a slick-wit freestyle rap throwdown
With snappier writing, and better FX // online celebs (and Google Ad checks) // The Epic Rap crew's halfway done with the brew // that is Epic Rap Battles of History Part Deux
The midseason's close? It comes out today. // In one corner: Santa Claus, fresh from his sleigh
And his prophet o' doom? "He ain't Mayan," ERBoH sez.
It's Snoop Dogg -- Snoop Lion -- as mothafuckin' Moses
[WHO WON?][WHO'S NEXT?][more inside]
posted by Rhaomi on Dec 10, 2012 - 27 comments

A Scary Christmas to All and to All a Good Fright

Horror movies aren't just for Halloween: Silent Night, Bloody Night, Black Christmas, To All A Good Night, Christmas Evil (starring Fiona Apple's dad as a homicidal Santa), Gremlins (in which Phoebe Cates learns there is no Santa Claus), Silent Night, Deadly Night (which inspired Parts 2, 3, 4, and 5 despite--or perhaps because of--denunciations by Siskel & Ebert and parents' groups), Elves, and Jack Frost
posted by jonp72 on Dec 4, 2012 - 36 comments

"A silver sixpence and a long toffee"

100-year old letter to Santa found in chimney
posted by boygeorge on Dec 21, 2011 - 53 comments

Right up there with Handel’s “Messiah.”

Santa answers a few pre-Christmas questions.
posted by rewil on Dec 20, 2011 - 23 comments

LaeCharles and DJDave

Regift It, Secret Santa, and Grinchin are three holiday raps from LaeCharles aka Lovey Love The Plus Size Playa
via Berkeley Enough from DJDave of Whole Foods Parking Lot [previously, Berkeley Remix, see also: Yoga Girl]
posted by finite on Dec 20, 2011 - 2 comments

"And Krampus, Every One..."

Krampus. the Christmas Demon of Germanic folklore whose job it was to punish the kids on Santa's Naughty List has been featured here before. And while most people assume he is a better-left-forgotten relic of less gentle times (or less gentle places), he appears to be having a resurgence this year, being featured everywhere from Buzzfeed to FearNet to The Awl to NPR. He's getting a piece of the Christmas merchandise blitz and of course he has his own website. There is Krampus music and he even speaks in his own defense. And of course, he has a 'Folk Death Metal' band named after him.
But the biggest Krampus Kontroversy today is via travel/food TV maven Anthony Bourdain, who wrote and had animated a cautionary Krampus story for the holiday edition of his show, which was rejected by his bosses at the Travel Channel. Fortunately, you can still see it on YouTube. Happy Holidays!
posted by oneswellfoop on Dec 12, 2011 - 30 comments

Santa's got backup

A sub-directorate of the Bureau of Special Christmas Operations (BOSCO), Santa's Little Secret Service is an Elvish security agency with the primary mission of ensuring the safety of Santa, Mrs. Claus and other high-value Christmas persons. The Service is separated into divisions focusing on personal protection, diplomatic protection, intelligence, and Christmas certainty operations.

When not protecting Santa, LSS can found assisting in protection of other high-value, Holiday persons, such as the Easter Bunny and Jesus with the help of their unique Candy Cane weapons.
posted by Brandon Blatcher on Dec 10, 2011 - 16 comments

Are Your Greetings Seasoned?

"I can’t even tell you how excited I was to finally see the cards that “killed my grandfather” and drove my family into extreme poverty. I actually think Haruo did a pretty good job interpreting my grandfather’s original sketch, considering the severely confusing nature of his drawing. It’s anybody’s guess as what my grandfather expected to get back, but needless to say it wasn’t this beautiful card." Bradwick J. McGinty III tells the story of the Japanese cut-away Santa cards from 1955, similar in style to the yōkai and kaiju illustrations seen previously. (via)
posted by filthy light thief on Nov 27, 2011 - 74 comments

New Mexico Burning

The town of Los Alamos, NM (home of LANL and the atomic bomb) is under a mandatory evacuation due to the Las Conchas wildfire. [more inside]
posted by jabo on Jun 27, 2011 - 44 comments

He's over Namibia. Now, you can ask your parents where that is.

REMARKS BY THE FIRST LADY TO CHILDREN WHILE TRACKING SANTA WITH NORAD Every year NORAD (North American Aerospace Defense Command) helps track Santa Claus's movement around the globe [previously]. The transcript of First Lady Michelle Obama's conversations with kids on Christmas as she watches the radar, sent to the White House press list last night, is absolutely adorable. Much more at the Norad Santa headquarters, and an interview with the head researcher at the Department of Energy tasked with tracking St Nick.
posted by jtajta on Dec 25, 2010 - 42 comments

They see you when you're sleeping

This Christmas Eve spare a thought for the Chrildren of Iceland, who will be suffering a traumatising visit from Kertasníkir, or "Candle Beggar", the thirteenth and final of the strange and somewhat sinister Icelandic Santas, or Yule lads, who are the childre of the ogress Gryla. Most of them don't seem to care if you've been bad or good - mainly they want to steal your food and wreck stuff. [more inside]
posted by Artw on Dec 24, 2010 - 27 comments

Ho Ho Hooooooo

The True Story Behind Christmas
posted by empath on Dec 24, 2010 - 9 comments

Must Be Santa, over the years (now with more Dylan)

Must Be Santa was originally recorded (song on YT) in 1969 by Mitch Miller, with simple call-and-response lyrics that were a hit (song on YT) for Lorne Greene in 1966. The catchy song is amusing for small children, and cute when sung by groups of kids. With minor lyrical tweaks and a rowdy polka style (live clip), Brave Combo liven up the Christmas classic. Leave it to Bob Dylan to take it further. [more inside]
posted by filthy light thief on Dec 20, 2010 - 15 comments

"The key learning from this was that *Santa* IS brand. PARTLY literally and TOTALLY metaphorically."

*Santa* is a Concept, not an idea. It's an Emotion, not a feeling. It's both Yesterday and Today. And it's Tomorrow as well. Santa winds infinite Possibilities around finite Limitations to evoke the essence of invention and the Odour of Nostalgia. It has the complexity of Simpleness and the Simplicity of complexitiveness. It begins with the Hiss of Power and ends with the Ah of Surprise. *Santa* is.
posted by creeky on Dec 16, 2010 - 18 comments

Letters To Santa

Uh, the Postal Service began receiving Letters to Santa Claus more than 100 years ago. In 1912, Postmaster General Frank Hitchcock authorized local postmasters to allow postal employees and citizens to respond to the letters through programs such as Operation Santa, Letters To Santa & Globe Santa. Individuals or Groups fill out a form, and then basically make a kids' wish come true. Some letters get replies. Some Letters go to Macy's. Some busy elves even stay up all night to help. Like Tonight.
posted by Israel Tucker on Dec 14, 2010 - 16 comments

My kid could Photoshop that. Wait, what?

Desaturated Santa. Brody Qat uses a gray santa suit, contact lenses, and makeup to stand out in a crowd of Santas (previously). She explains here. More pics. Via Neatorama.
posted by condour75 on Dec 7, 2010 - 37 comments

The Great Handcar Regatta of 2010

The Great West End and Railroad Square Handcar Regatta and Exposition of Mechanical Wonders of 2010 As if September wasn't already a fine month in Northern California for urban artistic eccentricity, the Santa Rosa Handcar Regatta just completed its third iteration. Human-powered vehicles, human ingenuity, and general googawfery, the festival picks right up where How Berkeley Can You Be left off... Yeah, yeah, yeah SLST (Single Link Steam Punk)...but that is some fun shit right there... Coming soon to an abandoned rail bed near you?
posted by piedrasyluz on Sep 28, 2010 - 0 comments

Roughly 1 in 4 Americans is employed to keep fellow citizens in line and protect private wealth

“Being willing to sit in a boring classroom for 12 years, and then sign up for four more years and then sign up for three or more years after that—well, that’s a pretty good measure of your willingness to essentially do what you’re told,” - The Santa Fe Reporter talks to Economist Samuel Bowles about New Mexico's income gap, welfare, social mobility, and a radical way to help. (Via)
posted by The Whelk on Feb 5, 2010 - 47 comments

Santa Pope

6 to 8 Black Men. Christmas in the Netherlands as described by David Sedaris (SLYT)
posted by blue_beetle on Dec 24, 2009 - 20 comments

Everyone knows Santa isn't real

As households across the world quietly deploy presents from St. Nick, Kate Beaton, author of the charming historical webcomic Hark, a Vagrant! (previ ously) remembers the tradition in a bittersweet light. In spite of venerable op-eds (and their animated offspring), such pain moves some to question whether parents should teach their children to believe in Santa Claus at all.
posted by Rhaomi on Dec 24, 2009 - 25 comments

Santa, cleared to land runway 36, ceiling 300 feet.

What does Santa need after a night of delivering presents in bad weather? An instrument approach to the North Pole.
posted by pjern on Dec 24, 2009 - 9 comments

Still Life in Snowflakes

Christmas statues are commonplace in countries around the world. There are the usual snowmen (previously), reindeer, and other types of fauna (an update to a previous post). But the most sought-after model is of course the Fat Man. [more inside]
posted by Hardcore Poser on Dec 23, 2009 - 8 comments

Santa's Death Panel

Abandoned in a hat in the middle of a snowdrift as a newborn, rescued by a woodsman and guarded by a lioness, stolen and raised by a wood nymph, instructed in the ways of all the languages of the animals as a child, on the threshold of manhood he visited medieval Europe, feudal Japan, and Arabian markets to learn the inherent evil of humanity. For his insistence on toymaking, he was terrorized and repeatedly captured by a race determined to corrupt young minds, until his immortal protector came out to defend him with a laser-shooting axe which eradicated the malevolent culture. But can that same protector defend his ward's life to the likes of the Commander of the Wind Demons? The Life and Adventures of Santa Clause, a Rankin/Bass production, Part [1] [2] [3] [4] [5].
posted by Navelgazer on Dec 7, 2009 - 45 comments

Keeping an eye on and old friend

Russian strategic nuclear forces - an online watchdog of the movements of Russia's nuclear forces. [more inside]
posted by Burhanistan on Sep 20, 2009 - 8 comments

Santa Claus is Coming to Town...

Since 1955 NORAD (North American Aerospace Defense Command) has been tracking Santa's Christmas trek around the globe by way of radar, satellites, fighter jets and now Santa Cams. In addition to tracking via Google Maps, you can also follow his journey in 3D via Google Earth. Also, be sure to check the Santa Cams which capture video of the places he's already visited on his trip. [more inside]
posted by ericb on Dec 24, 2008 - 27 comments

Penguins in Santa outfits playing in the snow!

Penguins in Santa outfits playing in the snow!
posted by hermitosis on Dec 23, 2008 - 18 comments

Santa Job

Maybe you didn't get into the oldest Santa Claus School for an elite education. So you considered schools in other places. But being Santa Claus is something you can learn on your own. It's just a matter of learning how to dress and act. If you can handle the hours, the job insecurity, the union, the corporate pressure, and the customer relations, you may just find a jolly career.
posted by twoleftfeet on Dec 21, 2008 - 13 comments

Santa visits some interesting places

Ho, ho, ho! Santa visits Iraq. Seen via NORAD. [more inside]
posted by zerobyproxy on Dec 24, 2007 - 20 comments

Clement Clark, No More?

What to my wondering eyes should appear but the suggestion that "A Visit From St. Nicholas," the classic poem which has defined the American Santa Claus, from red suit and big belly to reindeer and chimney-delivery method, was written not by classics professor Clement Clarke Moore but by poet and military man Henry Livingston. Though some think the authorship controversy is sugarplum vision of Livingston's descendents, other scholars the claim: literary 'detective' Donald Foster agrees (though his sleuthing record is not unblemished). Leading historian of Christmas Stephen Nissenbaum, says that either way, St. Nick is the product of the same social world, that of the wealthy white elite in the New York of the early Republic. If the claim is true, then in the convoluted history of the manuscript we've gotten some reindeer names wrong.
posted by Miko on Dec 24, 2007 - 17 comments

I want a pony, I want a pony ...

Secret lives: Santa Claus Steady Mobbin' - I fear this will lead to no good.
posted by madamjujujive on Dec 22, 2007 - 12 comments

The "attractive nuisance" in the red suit.

He keeps his white gloved hands where parents can see them. And buys liability insurance, just in case.
posted by chlorus on Dec 21, 2007 - 59 comments

first facebook, now microsoft?

You want me to eat what?!? It's fun to talk about oral sex, but I want to chat about something else. To see if you have permission, sign in. Or just add northpole@live.com to your IM. Failing that, see what Howard has to offer.
posted by gman on Dec 6, 2007 - 20 comments

The Saint Nicholas Center: Discovering the truth about Santa Claus

Learn all about Sinterklaas, find out if Santa and Saint Nick the same person, and so much more!
posted by goml on Dec 4, 2007 - 19 comments

Lightly smooshed will get you lightly tased.

"What do you think of that, Santa?" Yet another case of student 'art projects' out of control . . . other incredible violations of mall-Santa lap etiquette:1, 2, 3, and no doubt the most flagrant example, 4. Be careful out there.
posted by huckhound on Dec 3, 2007 - 32 comments

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