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Not 21 days

How Long does it actually take to form a habit? Answer: Not 21 days. ...Maltz's work influenced nearly every major "self-help" professional from Zig Ziglar to Brian Tracy to Tony Robbins. And as more people recited Maltz's story -- like a very long game of "Telephone" -- people began to forget that he said "a minimum of about 21 days" and shortened it to: "It takes 21 days to form a new habit." A study debunks a popular self-help myth.
posted by storybored on Apr 19, 2014 - 19 comments

 

The Charm Hacker

“What your mind believes, your body manifests.” Executive charisma coach Olivia Fox Cabane says she can make anyone more likable—for a price. But can charisma really be taught?
posted by rcraniac on Mar 30, 2014 - 38 comments

Finger-snap your way to nirvana

“Maybe stop trying so hard to find shortcuts to “hack” your life. The best things are hard. Invest in the journey. Just sayin’.”
posted by divabat on Mar 6, 2014 - 53 comments

Living In The U.X.A.

"At the height of the Great Depression, a group of unemployed Oakland workers decided to take matters into their own hands. The system wasn’t working, so they set up their own system. Money was nearly worthless, so they decided to live by barter. They called themselves the Unemployed Exchange Association and they soon went on to write a remarkable chapter in American economic history. This is their story."
posted by twirlip on Oct 30, 2013 - 14 comments

Herein lies the peace of God.

It was Ben who introduced me to A Course In Miracles. He was part of a self-help group that ran workshops based on a couple of popular New Age spiritual philosophies. Ben credited this group with his ongoing recovery from a mysterious undiagnosed chronic pain and illness, and he encouraged me to embrace it as a cure for whatever it was that caused me to spend so many of my days unable to get out of bed.
"Failing a Course in Miracles," Anne Ouellette, The Toast
posted by Rustic Etruscan on Sep 17, 2013 - 17 comments

Sell Yourself!

The history of the most baffling element of the employment dance - The Cover Letter. (The Atlantic)
posted by The Whelk on Sep 11, 2013 - 132 comments

Is forgiveness overrated?

"At one time, knowing that some actions are beneath the valley of the forgivable—the Holocaust, murder, rape, animal cruelty—gave our existence a little structure." In which fashiony-type Simon Doonan rails thoughtfully and rather humorously against our culture's insistence on forgiveness for everything.
posted by Jess the Mess on Apr 4, 2013 - 69 comments

the squidgy 1.5kg lump of pink stuff in our heads

NeuroBollocks: Debunking pseudo-neuroscience so you don't have to.
posted by cthuljew on Mar 31, 2013 - 18 comments

howtonotgiveafuck.com

How to not give a fuck
posted by AElfwine Evenstar on Oct 16, 2012 - 91 comments

Is your brain feeling good today?

Did you know? Today is World Mental Health Day. World Mental Health Day was started by the World Health Organization (WHO) in 1992 to raise awareness about mental health issues around the world. The World Federation for Mental Health has more information about this year's theme, Depression: A Global Crisis. Meanwhile, the Alternatives conference also starts today in Portland, Oregon. Now in its 26th year, this conference is the U.S.'s oldest national mental health conference organized and run for mental health consumers, offering tons of workshops on peer-delivered services and self-help/recovery methods. How will you celebrate World Mental Health Day? [more inside]
posted by docjohn on Oct 10, 2012 - 35 comments

"Jumping the rope is not good exercise, for it jars the body too much"

Obsolessons: selected passages from the self-help and guide books of the past. [via mefi projects]
posted by The Whelk on Sep 14, 2012 - 17 comments

Don't even Blink...

Your brain on pseudoscience: the rise of popular neurobollocks
posted by Artw on Sep 14, 2012 - 64 comments

"...the key is sympathy and empathy"

My Boss Has Body Odour and I Have Sex with My Twin. Four advice columnists — Cheryl Strayed, Cary Tennis, Emily Yoffe and Lynn Coady — talk shop. [more inside]
posted by zarq on Aug 28, 2012 - 58 comments

"The main thing is to keep the main thing the main thing."

Stephen Covey, author of The Seven Habits of Highly Successful People, died today at age 79. According to Covey's family, the death was due to "the residual effects of a bike accident he suffered this past April." The 7 Habits of Highly Successful People has sold more than 20 million copies since its initial publication in 1989, and is one of Time Magazine's "25 Most Influential Business Management Books." 7 Habits popularized the concepts of "win/win," "interdependence," and "paradigm shift" in self-help and managerial vocabularies.
posted by catlet on Jul 16, 2012 - 41 comments

Confessions of a recovering lifehacker

I used to be a lifehacking addict [...] But sometime over the last couple years (around the time I turned 30, not coincidentally), it has begun to dawn on me: Maybe all the time I spend looking for better ways to do things is keeping me from, well, doing things.
Confessions of a recovering lifehacker
posted by Foci for Analysis on May 23, 2012 - 64 comments

This Is How: Proven Aid in Overcoming Shyness, Molestation, Fatness, Spinsterhood, Grief, Disease, Lushery, Decrepitude & More. For Young and Old Alike’ by Augusten Burroughs

This is How: Proven Aid in Overcoming Shyness, Molestation, Fatness, Spinsterhood, Grief, Disease, Lushery, Decrepitude & More. For Young and Old Alike. is Augusten Burroughs' new self-help book (reviews here, here, and here), one which scorns the genre cliches of goal-setting and affirmations in favor of a hard-nosed philosophy of self-honesty based on lessons learned from his own background of abuse, neglect, and rape. In an interview with CNN, he gives snippets of his views on subjects like the harm of people "clinging to a dream which maybe they don't actually have the talent to do", suicide ("it doesn't release you, it adds a new layer of horror") and the quest for thinness ("the brain is magnificent and to focus on your gastrointestinal track is a complete waste"). (previously)
posted by shivohum on May 14, 2012 - 42 comments

“I miss the crowd.”

"One thing about life in New York: wherever you are, the neighborhood is always changing. An Italian enclave becomes Senegalese; a historically African-American corridor becomes a magnet for white professionals. The accents and rhythms shift; the aromas become spicy or vegetal. The transition is sometimes smooth, sometimes bumpy. But there is a sense of loss among the people left behind, wondering what happened to the neighborhood they once thought of as their own." For Sophia Goldberg (98), Holocaust survivor, change has meant the end of a way of life.
posted by zarq on Dec 1, 2011 - 34 comments

"A simple mantra has guided me through the darkest bouts of autocerebral asphyxiation: You don’t have to believe everything you think."

"Because of our mutant powers of obsession, it’s my guess that a lot of nerds suffer from addiction. Nerds get caught up in minutiae, because there is a tremendous and fulfilling sense of control in understanding every single detail of a thing more than any other living creature. But we also tend to have a very active internal monologue (in some cases, dialog). These are some delightful ingredients—mixed with a bit of genetic predisposition—for overdoing things that make us feel good in the moment." Chris Hardwick offers "self-help for nerds."
posted by jbickers on Nov 28, 2011 - 23 comments

Help me to help me.

Training in 'concrete thinking' can be self-help treatment for depression. 'New research provides the first evidence that depression can be treated by only targeting an individual’s style of thinking through repeated mental exercises in an approach called cognitive bias modification. The study[pdf] suggests an innovative psychological treatment called ‘concreteness training’ can reduce depression in just two months and could work as a self-help therapy for depression in primary care.' [more inside]
posted by VikingSword on Nov 22, 2011 - 62 comments

How to Make Smart Decisions in Less than 60 Seconds

How to Make Smart Decisions in Less than 60 Seconds: For each alternative, ask "Is this really me?"
posted by shivohum on Sep 12, 2011 - 168 comments

Zig Ziglar on Goals

Motivational speaker Zig Ziglar on goals (Youtube videos: part 1, part 2, part 3)
posted by shivohum on Aug 2, 2011 - 33 comments

I wish we could stop saying these. We should really try to, or else we get what we deserve.

Four Words that Make Me Suspicious of Myself When I say Them. [more inside]
posted by codacorolla on May 2, 2011 - 89 comments

Killin' It with Paul Crik

Killin' It is a motivational program developed by Paul Crik, born of his life experiences. Testimonials. Killing Addiction. Hard Day. Narcissism. Foot Racing A Mac Truck. Re-Naming Things For Your Mental Health. Technoviking. This Is It, Fuck It, It Is What It Is. The Future.
posted by finite on Nov 8, 2010 - 39 comments

Twenty-First Century Stoic

William B. Irvine has written a three-part essay (1, 2, 3) for BoingBoing summarizing his book A Guide to the Good Life: The Ancient Art of Stoic Joy. The Philosophers' Magazine has also commented on the revival of Stoicism. [more inside]
posted by TheophileEscargot on Nov 1, 2010 - 42 comments

Suck it Tony Robbins

In 1983, renowned photographer Lynn Goldsmith, became, with a little help from her friends, Will Powers. [more inside]
posted by timsteil on Aug 6, 2010 - 10 comments

Start Your Own Cult, with Dr. Emeril Lazarus


"The time is right, and the time is now! The Lord has spoken to you. He has commanded you to create the New Jerusalem, to prepare for His arrival, to gather the flock, bring together the faithful, spread the Word. Blinded like Paul on his way to Damascus, you are now set to follow His Way. But how do you start such an ambitious project?" Dr. Emeril Lazarus has all the answers.
posted by Kattullus on Jun 16, 2007 - 16 comments

Highly Sensitive People: if you prick us, do we not bleed? and burst into tears? and run from the room and fling ourselves down on the bed?

Are you a Highly Sensitive Person? This trait ... is inherited by 15 to 20% of the population, and ... seems to be present in all higher animals. Being an HSP means your nervous system is more sensitive to subtleties. Your sight, hearing, and sense of smell are not necessarily keener .... But your brain processes information and reflects on it more deeply. Being an HSP also means, necessarily, that you are more easily overstimulated, stressed out, overwhelmed. This trait ... has been mislabeled as shyness (not an inherited trait), introversion (30% of HSPs are actually extraverts), inhibitedness, fearfulness, and the like. HSPs can be these, but none of these are the fundamental trait they have inherited ...
yahoo group | latest research (fascinating!) | newsletter | wikipedia | blog | via
posted by grumblebee on Apr 8, 2007 - 150 comments

There comes a time in every young woman's life...

Scans from On Becoming a Woman by Harold Shryock, M.A., M.D. (1906-2004).
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane on Apr 7, 2007 - 24 comments

The Icarus Project

The space between brilliance and madness
posted by serazin on Mar 20, 2007 - 14 comments

Task: Taste my food for poison-receiver: The cashier at McDonalds

This Blog Will Change Your Life -- My year-long adventure following the daily instructions presented in This Book Will Change Your Life by Benrik Limited as closely as possible without getting arrested or dying... : >
posted by amberglow on Nov 26, 2005 - 23 comments

Tools for Coping with Life's Stressors.

Tools for Coping.
posted by sgt.serenity on Nov 24, 2005 - 23 comments

M. Scott Peck: I'm a prophet, not a saint

M. Scott Peck: I'm a prophet, not a saint M. Scott Peck, author of the ultimate self-help manual, has Parkinson’s and his wife of 43 years has walked out. Interesting profile of M. Scott Peck, the best-selling self-help author who preached self-discipline and delayed gratification despite being a smoker, a drinker, and an adulterer. Via Bookslut. (Possibly nsfw drawing of nude woman.)
posted by callmejay on May 11, 2005 - 18 comments

Self-help equals self-harm?

Self-help equals self-harm? Are self-help books harmful rather than helpful? This article argues that dissatisfaction with one's abilities and achievements will not not be helped by affirmations of self-worth. Nor will we succeed in coping with the bitter feelings for those who have wronged us by practing the "anger therapy" of slamming a punching bag. [More Inside]
posted by gregb1007 on Dec 1, 2003 - 24 comments

three guesses what led me to search for this...

106 Cures For The Hiccups
posted by anastasiav on Nov 13, 2003 - 37 comments

British bachelors beware

British bachelors beware. Rachel Greenwald knows how to find a husband using the techniques of Harvard Business School, and she's bringing her methods to the UK. But it's not easy: she advocates careful 'packaging', putting 10 to 20% of total income into a separate 'find a husband' bank account, cancelling newspaper subscriptions so they can be read in public and getting a third party to contact unsuccessful dates for feedback. There's one change for the UK though: here it's aimed at over-30s instead of the over-35s. I always thought "the Rules" were too spontaneous.
posted by TheophileEscargot on Sep 30, 2003 - 40 comments

Caroline Myss,

Caroline Myss, Ph.D., is a wildly popular best-selling self-help author, loved by Oprah and PBS stations. She has her own show on Oxygen. But in what did she earn her cherished and paraded Ph.D.? Intuition and Energy Medicine. Where did she earn it? From a non-accredited correspondence school. Who founded the department from whence she graduated? She did. She maked it up. I'm always a bit skeptical of the intelligence and merit of anyone who so prominently adorns their pop writing with academic credentials. Here, my skepticism seems vindicated. Any other gurus out there with bogus credentials?
posted by dilettanti on Sep 23, 2002 - 38 comments

"Are you ready to experience the future of digital pleasure?"'

"Are you ready to experience the future of digital pleasure?"' That link hit my inbox closely on the heels of my perusing this thread. From a 'moral standpoint', better than/worse than/same as inducing something internally?
posted by JettSuperior on Aug 18, 2002 - 23 comments

NYT Magazine's Lauren Slater on Self-Esteem

NYT Magazine's Lauren Slater on Self-Esteem
Last year alone there were three withering studies of self-esteem released in the United States, all of which had the same central message: people with high self-esteem pose a greater threat to those around them than people with low self-esteem and feeling bad about yourself is not the cause of our country's biggest, most expensive social problems. The research is original and compelling and lays the groundwork for a new, important kind of narrative about what makes life worth living -- if we choose to listen, which might be hard. One of this country's most central tenets, after all, is the pursuit of happiness, which has been strangely joined to the pursuit of self-worth.

Great, long article on the change in perspective on self-esteem. Do you question yourself? How does your self-esteem impact yourself or others around you? Is high self-esteem importatnt to you? What if your high self-esteem could negatively affect others around you?
posted by gen on Feb 5, 2002 - 39 comments

The Surrendered Wife continues the recidivist trend in best selling "self-help" books by urging wives to "avoid criticising him... and give him lots of oral sex." Can anyone explain why this nonsense sells so well?
posted by Chairman_MaoXian on Mar 3, 2001 - 13 comments

She's an expert on marriages. How do we know this? Because she's written a book about it. And what is her advice for a successful, happy marriage? The woman should be acquiescent to the man. I open the floor for comments...
posted by aaron on Jan 17, 2001 - 27 comments

John Gray wants to change the world

John Gray wants to change the world "But I have no interest in politics right now," he says. "The world is not ready for my messages. I've got a whole -- it has evolved. If you get me talking about it, which I won't do because it's too distracting, I have a whole agenda, a whole political party -- what to do about poverty, what to do about drug addiction, what to do about economics, what to do about welfare, what to do about health policies.
posted by john on Aug 24, 2000 - 17 comments

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