Valentine's day sucks. After you learn how to survive it alone, count your blessings that at least you aren't on a bad date like Lynn. Hey, once you've cheered up a little, why not send a card to a special someone and maybe add some candy hearts to the mix. Then again, just boycotting the whole damn thing might be best idea yet.
Anti-Valentines: "She said, 'I've been tapping my foot under my desk so that you'll be my friend again.' Then she started crying."