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"it is wise to be appropriately pessimistic here"

How we end up marrying the wrong people [more inside]
posted by flex on Jul 18, 2014 - 55 comments

Cheatbook

New research finds a correlation between social network use and divorce rates. "We don't know whether Facebook is causing divorce or divorce is causing the use of Facebook," said a study author. A Facebook spokesman says it's "ludicrous" to suggest a link between the social network site and divorce. [more inside]
posted by stbalbach on Jul 8, 2014 - 104 comments

Just when you think you have everything figured out...

"The world has a sick sense of humor and throws you for a loop." (via Permatemp Corporation.) [more inside]
posted by simulacra on Mar 5, 2014 - 1 comment

La Voz del Pueblo/Voice of the People

More than 12,000 Catholics from five continents answered questions in a massive survey commissioned by Univision and conducted by Bendixen & Amandi International. Topics covered included all the issues most likely to generate lively discussion among Catholics all over the world. Here's how they responded. [more inside]
posted by 2N2222 on Feb 12, 2014 - 15 comments

Points for creativity?

"In a bizarre case involving threats of kidnapping, beatings and physical torture — including the use of an electric cattle prod— two rabbis were charged in New Jersey on Wednesday in a scheme to force men to grant their wives religious divorces." [more inside]
posted by showbiz_liz on Oct 10, 2013 - 131 comments

We've got a kotton krown, gonna keep it underground

Kim Gordon talks to Elle magazine about her split from husband Thurston Moore and her life at age 59.
posted by porn in the woods on Apr 23, 2013 - 156 comments

If you liked it, you shoulda put a ring on it.

The Supreme Court of Canada rules that in Quebec, common-law spouses do not have the same rights as married ones. [more inside]
posted by Kitteh on Jan 25, 2013 - 58 comments

What divorced readers did with their wedding rings

A Magazine article on when to take off a wedding ring after a marriage fails generated a large response from readers. The feature asked when it was appropriate to remove the band, and explored the symbolism of doing so. Here, readers share their stories about the dilemma of what to do with a symbol of marriage once the relationship has broken down.
posted by Blasdelb on Jul 14, 2012 - 154 comments

The end of "With this policy, I thee wed."

Obamacare: One Less Reason to Get Married. Erin Gloria Ryan of Jezebel writes: Insurance Marriages had become to the 21st century what shotgun weddings were to jokes about hillbillies. Back in 2004, the LA Times wrote about couples that married for insurance, couples who for varying reasons had not wanted to marry, but who had been driven to marriage by financial necessity. ABC News posted its own roundup of With This Policy, I Thee Wed-style couples in 2008, as did the New York Times. In 2008, 7% of couples who married reported doing so primarily for the insurance benefits. [more inside]
posted by Cash4Lead on Jun 30, 2012 - 61 comments

You just don’t know you know them...

Why do most people assume that all nonmonogamous relationships are destined to fail? Because we only hear about the ones that do. If a three-way or an affair was a factor in a divorce or breakup, we hear all about it. But we rarely hear from happy couples who aren’t monogamous, because they don’t want to be perceived as dangerous sex maniacs who are destined to divorce. Monogamish Couples Share Their Stories.
posted by sour cream on Jan 6, 2012 - 122 comments

Devotional snail mail in the PRC

China's post office is not normally a place you would associate with love. However, Beijing authorities, alarmed at the skyrocketing divorce rate, are promoting a new service in which the post office will send a love letter to your partner – after a delay of seven year [sic]. [more inside]
posted by obscurator on Nov 1, 2011 - 16 comments

Temporary Marriage: the next big thing?

Temporary marriage: the next big thing? The divorce rate in Mexico City is huge, with half of marriages ending within two years. Some lawmakers there are introducing a reform to the civil code that would make marriage contracts renewable, with a minimum of two years. [more inside]
posted by jenfullmoon on Sep 30, 2011 - 36 comments

Do I stay or do I go now?

This week Pat Robertson (controversial as always) addressed an uncomfortable question. What are we obligated to do when our spouse becomes completely incapacitated? This is a relatively common situation for the elderly, one person declining faster than the other, but the same questions remain as with a couple in their thirties. Do you live with celibacy, divorce or commit infidelity? Dan Savage’s rules on cheating include a pass for caregiver/spouses in this situation to preserve the marriage. Things can become more difficult when the sexual relationship does not end after a partner becomes infirm.
posted by Blisterlips on Sep 15, 2011 - 96 comments

It's not the one Elvis sang about...

The Dutch Heartbreak Hotel offers separating couples throughout the Netherlands and Belgium a unique service: a complete, finalized divorce in just 48 hours. [more inside]
posted by Unicorn on the cob on Aug 9, 2011 - 4 comments

Marriage in America

Divorce rates are higher than ever? Think again. A large majority—92%—of children whose families make more than $75,000 a year live with two parents (including step-parents). At the bottom of the income scale—families earning less than $15,000—only 20% of children live with two parents. Of those who first tied the knot between 1975 and 1979, 29% were divorced within ten years. Among those who first married between 1990 and 1994, only 16.5% were.
posted by lohmannn on Jul 20, 2011 - 40 comments

[T]he parties have repeatedly shown that they are immune to reason. Consequently, in my decision, I have tried ridicule as a last resort."

An Ontario Family Court judge was not very happy with the parties involved in a divorce case [PDF] before him.
posted by Chrysostom on Jul 12, 2011 - 87 comments

"The dress is designed to look it's most beautiful as the woman walks away"

The joint crushing of the wedding ring is the highlight of the event With many people reassessing their life choices following the tsunami, Japan is seeing a marked increase in divorce ceremonies. As well as the ring crushing, these ceremonies feature friends and family witnesses, dresses "designed to look it's most beautiful as the woman walks away" and frog motifs.
posted by sarastro on Jul 5, 2011 - 78 comments

A Happy Life Depicted in Diagrams

The Harvard Study of Adult Development is the longest prospective study of mental and physical well-being ever conducted. For 72 years, researchers at Harvard have been following 824 individuals through war, career, marriage and divorce, parenthood and grandparenthood, and old age. Designer Laura Javier took ten of those cases and visualized them in the Elements of Happiness. [via flowingdata]
posted by anifinder on Jun 27, 2011 - 13 comments

Situations like this are why the phrase "Oh, snap!" was invented.

Using a fake Facebook profile, Angela Voelkert got her ex-husband David to admit that he “planned to move somewhere warm with his kids, that he was still going to his next court dates, and would take off soon after” and ask his new teen-aged friend “to find someone at your school, there should be some gang bangers there that would put a cap in her ass for $10,000. I am just done with her crap!” Unfortunately for Angela, David was a step ahead and thoroughly played his ex-wife. All charges have been dropped and they are still Facebook friends.
posted by -->NMN.80.418 on Jun 13, 2011 - 139 comments

Things were wonderful once

1. Tin Huey T-Shirt. 2. A silk-screened poster from the Sept. 22, 2000, Mary Timony (of Helium) concert in Oberlin, Ohio. 3. "Crazy Rhythms" by the Feelies (on white vinyl). 4. A big-ass dining room table. 5. The Futon. 6. One audio MiniDisc of the Black Keys' first live performance, July 2002. 7. 7. One black-and-white photo of Patrick and me, taken in 2003, at Apple Studios. A marriage, and divorce, in seven mementos.
posted by Horace Rumpole on Mar 3, 2011 - 28 comments

Sharia law, marriage contracts, and the rights of women

How Sharia law can be both good or bad for women (via a&l daily)
posted by jb on Sep 19, 2010 - 44 comments

One way to move on after a divorce

My wife of 12 years packed up her belongings last year and moved out of our home. After her car was loaded I couldn't help but notice that a single item remained in her section of our closet, her wedding dress. "You forgot something" I told her. She replied "And what's that?". "Your wedding dress", I said. "Yeah, I am not taking that" was her response. "What do you expect me to do with it?" I asked. And to that she replied, "Whatever the $%^@# you want". And this is what I did.....
posted by Brandon Blatcher on Jun 24, 2010 - 105 comments

Worst. Divorce. Ever.

A lawyer and her husband decide to get a divorce. Then, the lawyer loses her mind.
posted by reenum on Jun 10, 2010 - 131 comments

Sentimental dynamics

Mathematical model explains marital breakups.
posted by twoleftfeet on May 18, 2010 - 20 comments

Out of Tandem

Shut Up and Ride. A short video about breaking up.
posted by msalt on Apr 8, 2010 - 3 comments

funemployment

How a New Jobless Era Will Transform America
The Great Recession may be over, but this era of high joblessness is probably just beginning. Before it ends, it will likely change the life course and character of a generation of young adults. It will leave an indelible imprint on many blue-collar men. It could cripple marriage as an institution in many communities. It may already be plunging many inner cities into a despair not seen for decades. Ultimately, it is likely to warp our politics, our culture, and the character of our society for years to come. (via rw)
posted by kliuless on Feb 11, 2010 - 84 comments

"If other people have failed him... I will not be the one to fail him."

The child you saved by adopting him might just save you in return. A quiet first-person story of how a married guy became a single dad to an adopted son - the wife moved on, but the boy remained. (SLYahooV)
posted by micketymoc on Aug 31, 2009 - 5 comments

End Disposable Marriage

Leah Ward Sears, former Chief Justice of the Georgia Supreme Court, on the destruction of fatherhood in Western society. This may sound like heresy, but I believe the United States and a host of Western democracies are engaged in an unintended campaign to diminish the importance of marriage and fatherhood. By refusing to do everything we can to stem the rising rate of divorce and unwed childbearing, our country often isolates fathers (and sometimes mothers) from their children and their families.
posted by smoothvirus on Jul 2, 2009 - 127 comments

"Good relationships take work."

Let's Call The Whole Thing Off. The author [Sandra Tsing Loh] is ending her marriage. Isn’t it time you did the same?
posted by you just lost the game on Jun 17, 2009 - 315 comments

dY dVorce = ?

Oxford Professor & Fellow of the Royal Society James Murray uses mathematical modelling to predict whether a marriage will survive or end in divorce, with 94% accuracy. His lecture to the Royal Society will be available for view on demand within two days.
posted by UbuRoivas on Mar 26, 2009 - 44 comments

A 10-year-old divorcée takes Paris

"In a dimly lit corner of a Paris bar a delighted young divorcée describes in a soft voice how she spent the day throwing snowballs for the first time in her life. That is not remarkable. This is: Nujood Ali is just 10 years old."
posted by mr_crash_davis mark II: Jazz Odyssey on Feb 3, 2009 - 36 comments

Please don't divorce my papa and daddy.

Please don't divorce us. An emotional argument for overturning Prop 8.
posted by desjardins on Dec 26, 2008 - 112 comments

Be careful what you wish for... you just might get it.

What's tougher to get than a same-sex marriage? A same-sex divorce. [more inside]
posted by anotherpanacea on Jul 25, 2008 - 32 comments

A Divorce Portrait

Your feel-bad story for the day: as a follow-up to this, true love evidently doesn't conquer all. That having been said, your feel-good story for the day: this guy has freaking amazing powers of emotional recuperation ...
posted by WCityMike on Jul 15, 2008 - 65 comments

Take it to YouTube

Divorce can make people do things they might regret. (SLYT)
posted by msalt on Apr 16, 2008 - 96 comments

For Sale: One Life, Used

Ian Usher's divorce prompted a decision to sell his entire life to the highest bidder. You can buy his life for A$230,000: clothes, home, vehicles - even his job & friends.
posted by batmonkey on Mar 17, 2008 - 18 comments

30 day sex (or no sex) challenge

A church in Tampa, FL has issued a 30-day sex challenge: If you're married, have sex every day (PDF of daily workbook). If you're not married, don't have sex at all (PDF of daily workbook). There's a blog, there's a billboard, there's a lot of press. [more inside]
posted by ThePinkSuperhero on Feb 27, 2008 - 213 comments

Gay cuisine - is it tops?

GayHappinessFilter: Early studies on the subject concluded that "heterosexual relationships may have a great deal to learn from homosexual relationships." (pdf) But even so, do gay relationships tend to end sooner? Perhaps, but according to recent research, gay and lesbian couples are just as committed in their relationships as heterosexuals. (pdf) In fact, same-sex couples are actually more satisfied with their relationships, (pdf) and reported more positive feelings toward their partners and less conflict than heterosexual married couples. (Probably just as well, since just because you can be a gay newlywed doesn’t necessarily mean you can be a gay divorcee.) So what’s the secret to gay happiness? Most likely not ”the most satisfying orgasm you can get ... pure sexuality ... almost like pure heroin,” although that’s a heck of an endorsement from a “researcher” who claims to be against it.
posted by kyrademon on Jan 24, 2008 - 35 comments

The nastiest divorce/custody/dead baby stories you're ever likely to run across

Here's the background of one of the nastiest divorce/custody/dead baby stories you're ever likely to run across. Alan Rodgers is a horror writer. This is his wikipedia entry, and this is his blog/forum at sff.net. He was originally married to Amy Stout, and together they had three children, two girls and a boy. After he tried to kill Amy Stout, she left him and married -- Me, Dan Moran. I'm the handsome dude in the eyepatch, if you click through to my profile. Together Alan and Amy #2 had a baby: Anthony Rodgers. Who died under interesting circumstances. A tragedy, I believe Alan Rodgers has called it, and by "tragedy" I suspect he means, "Thank God I wasn't prosecuted for negligent homicide." Or worse.
posted by thanotopsis on Jun 14, 2007 - 44 comments

Marriage in America: The Frayed Knot

Marriage in America: The Frayed Knot. "As the divorce rate plummets at the top of American society and rises at the bottom, the widening “marriage gap” is breeding inequality."
posted by chunking express on May 25, 2007 - 133 comments

Wedding Ring Coffin

"When a marriage dies, what should be done with the wedding ring? Until now, millions of wedding rings have been banished to remote corners of sock and underwear drawers. Now you can give these wedding rings the proper final resting place they deserve."
posted by mr_crash_davis on May 15, 2007 - 45 comments

Ukulele full of hate

Catchy bitter ukulele break-up song by Duncan Pflaster. Video with song. Simple and excellent. Found via Cat and Girl.
posted by LobsterMitten on Mar 30, 2007 - 27 comments

Powdered Milk!

"If they want to be accepted as couples and daddies, however, the flamboyance may have to be brought under control" writes, of all people, public radio darling Garrison Keillor (first link Salon). Dan Savage responds: "F Garrison Keillor," who it turns out is an adulterer who's been married three times.
posted by bardic on Mar 14, 2007 - 150 comments

Note To Self: Don't Godwin The Prosecuting Attorney, Etc

Brenda Dickson, soap opera actress, asks politely for a divorce, but is "put out on the street " by the "cowboys in mediation." Follow the exploits of this postergirl for class rage through her own press releases, here, here, and here (What It Was Like In Prison).
posted by maryh on Mar 13, 2007 - 13 comments

I Love You Kenisha

I Love You Kenisha. My dear sweet Kenisha, If you find this page, please forgive me for my failure to be a the kind of leader in our marriage and our home that God has called me to be. When ever you decide to come home, I'll be here waiting for you. If I'm 100 years old, and on my death bed, and you haven't come back yet, I'll still be waiting for you!!! I love you with all my heart!!!
posted by jonson on Feb 11, 2007 - 125 comments

A Good Year for the Roses

Your husband left you? It could be worse. Divorcing couple builds a wall through the family home neither will leave. Apparently breaking up, but not moving out, is not uncommon, it is even recommended. Even among us.
posted by Methylviolet on Feb 10, 2007 - 21 comments

"Things like that happen."

Calling All Wingnuts blogger Mike Stark (previously discussed here) found himself in a fight with George Allen's staffers after asking the Senator an impertinent question about his first wife and sealed divorce file and court records.
posted by homunculus on Oct 31, 2006 - 29 comments

God-damned divorces! Err....

An interesting link breaking apart the myths of religious affiliation and the divorce rate. They also take on divorce rates in interfaith couples.
posted by Kickstart70 on Oct 6, 2006 - 82 comments

(affair, divorce, affair, divorce)

the most maritally challenged crop of presidential hopefuls in American political history --meet 3 leading GOP candidates for 08. We've already read about Hillary's sexlife (or lack thereof), but will the double standard hold? ...if the top three Democratic presidential hopefuls each had extra-marital affairs in their backgrounds, it stands to reason that Republicans would have something to say about it--and if the past is any guide, those concerns would find their way into the papers. Will the same happen when it's about the "party of family values and morality"?
posted by amberglow on Jun 20, 2006 - 84 comments

sperm bank

Bizarre child support battle in Brooklyn A Brooklyn, New York man who stopped paying storage fees for his frozen sperm after divorcing his wife has filed suit against the sperm bank, his ex, and a notary public after learning she picked up the payments and used the sperm to get pregnant. Deon Francois, who now must pay child support, says he didn't want a child and never gave consent for the use of his sperm.
posted by halekon on Jul 27, 2005 - 110 comments

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