Poor little Daisy Moshammer...
After a life of leisure, immortalized
on the arm of her famous, eccentric papa
, the little dog's troubles began on the tragic evening of January 13th in Grünwald. Alas, poor little Daisy was fast asleep in bed
when strange man
strangled her beloved fashion icon daddy
to death with a telephone cord. As he was a huge celebrity
in Germany, the country mourned
. "What will become of me without Daddy?"
Daisy whimpered. "I've been carried around so long, I don't even know how to walk anymore..."
When the will was read, Daddy proved he loved her!
But without him to carry her, Daisy's world began to spiral out of control. Suddenly wealthy and thrust into the spotlight alone
without her beloved big-haired father... how will she ever fill the void? Sex? Drugs? Are you kidding? Daddy would've much prefer shopping
Just which toys, bowls, crates, etc. can stand up to the tender attentions of a young and determined Labrador Retreiver?
" A Consumer Reports
-like website for testing stuff to see how it will stand up to a big dog. My favorite item.
What a neat way to write your dog off as a business expense!
Lost Dog Held for $10K Ransom
An elderly man went out for a walk with his dog, on the way home, the dog disappeared. A friend helped him make some Lost Dog posters and he waited by the phone for some good samaritan to return his only companion.
Instead, he got a call from someone demanding $10,000 or he'd never see his dog again. He gathered up half of his savings and went to pay the ransom. The dognapper brandished a knife, took the money and said the dog was tied up to a post nearby. It wasn't.
He went home brokenhearted until he heard a car door slam outside and his dog came running up to greet him. Now he wonders if the dognappers were putting him on the whole time.
Doggie Perfume Sets Tails Wagging.
Does this mean it was tested on humans first?
If "dog bites man" isn't news, but "man bites dog" is news, what is "dog shoots man
"? Sonny the gun discharging dog isn't the first animal
to allegedly take-up arms against humans. Rather, animal caused shootings seem to be relatively common and a truly international phenomenon
fights back for the Koreans. Eat them, just kill them humanely. Please.
Arf-arf! Yip! Bow wow! Grrrruf! Pant pant.
What's the matter? You'd understand me better if you had a dog translator.
Toss a dog in traffic, go to jail.
So, what do you suppose a fair punishment should be? And, consider that dogs, while cute, aren't people.