Mentos + Coke + Condom. SLYT. Safe for work, unless you're against balloons.
Americans Not Making Time for Making Love according to Durex® [note: PR and attendant conflicts]. "Americans are having a lot less sex than just about everyone else in the world, and when they do, less than half are fully satisfied." Also from the 2007/2008 Durex® Sexual Wellbeing Global Survey: Where is sex safer?