Get ready for the Kitten Summer Games, Hallmark’s catty, pun-filled Olympics counter-programming, complete with cat-thletes named Felina Williams, John MacNMeow, and Pawdre Ag-Hissy—and that’s just in tennis. In the same style as the Puppy Bowl (another video, previously), which the Hallmark Channel matched with Kitten Bowl in 2014. Kitten Summer Games is going for the gold in groaner puns. Watch a preview of Road to the Kitten Summer Games: Track & Field (KTRK), exclusive videos and more.
For the past twenty-five years, Hallmark has included Star Trek themed Christmas ornaments in it's annual Keepsake ornament series (Memory Alpha has a complete rundown). These range from ships to characters to props to memorable scenes. However, none of these compare to this years' contributions, which include perhaps the pinnacle of their efforts.
"I sold my wife’s clothes to build a Christmas village in my parents’ basement." “Oh, Richard has a Christmas village,” my mother said, and began to explain it in painstaking detail. And while I listened to her confuse my post office and library, gloss over my recreation area, and completely fuck up my all-embracing vision, I became assured that there was only a teeny little chance that Litia and I would ever have sex again.
In 1959, iconic Surrealist painter Salvador Dalí agreed to design several holiday greeting cards for Hallmark, "with several stipulations. He asked for $15,000 [$122,200 in 2014 dollars] in cash in advance for 10 greeting card designs, with no suggestions from Hallmark for the subject or medium, no deadline and no royalties." [more inside]
The Art of Hermann Zapf film "was produced in 1967 at Hallmark Cards in Kansas City and in my design studio in Dreieichenhain, Germany... After long discussions and the help of a lot of alcohol we started late in the night. I was sitting at a slanted glass table with a hot spotlight in my neck. Frank Robinson was lying on the floor with the camera ready for a frog-view shot. My task was to write beautiful letters with ink which dried as soon the pen touched the slippery surface of an astralon sheet." — Hermann Zapf
How a misunderstanding about Chinese characters has led many astray. The explication of the Chinese word for crisis as made up of two components signifying danger and opportunity is due partly to wishful thinking, but mainly to a fundamental misunderstanding about how terms are formed in Mandarin and other Sinitic languages... Among the most egregious of the radical errors in this statement is the use of the exotic term “Ideogram” to refer to Chinese characters. Linguists and writing theorists avoid “ideogram” as a descriptive referent for hanzi (Mandarin) / kanji (Japanese) / hanja (Korean) because only an exceedingly small proportion of them actually convey ideas directly through their shapes... [more inside]
"This is for the guy who needed a card to come out to his parents." (Youtube) David Ellis Dickerson draws on his previous job as a Hallmark greeting card writer to create funny, poignant cards for people with unconventional greeting card emergencies (but he won't do cards aimed at making people feel bad). [more inside]
Rainbow Brite's fans are apparently more legion than I had known. Don't miss the fanfic or the gallery! With the help of her sidekick Twink, Rainbow Brite struggles on to defend Colorland from the forces of darkness.