Is Mario Balotelli the most entertaining footballer of all time? "Oh Balotelli he's a striker… He's good at darts/ He's allergic to grass but when he plays/ He's fucking class. Drives round Moss Side/ with a wallet full of cash/ Can't put on his vest/ But when he does he is the best Goes into schools / Tells teachers all the rules Sets fire to his gaff / With rockets from his bath Doesn't give a fuck/ Cos he did it for a laugh Runs back to his house / For a suitcase full of cash Oh Balotelli …"
Last night, my brother, the real football fan, regailed me with stories of a bizarre double life that an English player seemed to be leading. Looks like someone beat me to collecting them all.