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Congratulations Newlyweds

Marriage equality comes to Minnesota and Rhode Island at midnight, August 1, and the Minnesota DFL state senators wanted to congratulate their same-sex newlywed constituents. [more inside]
posted by roomthreeseventeen on Jul 31, 2013 - 34 comments

You've ruined my dreams.

When Nada Al-Ahdal discovered that her parents had sold her she ran away. She is 11 years old, and this is her message. [more inside]
posted by Joe in Australia on Jul 22, 2013 - 32 comments

To get married, they left Ohio

New York was the closest to drive to, but they’d both need to be there for the license and return for the wedding. Out, they decided. California and Washington, and the knot of northeastern states that have legalized same-sex marriage, were too far. Maryland required only one partner to come for the license. Then a 48-hour waiting period. It was an hour and 10-minute flight. This might work, they decided: A destination wedding in Baltimore.
posted by hoyland on Jul 14, 2013 - 54 comments

It's My Day

Do modern Western weddings encourage narcissism?. From the large budgets to the phenomenon of self marriage, many people skirt the line between narcissism and individuality.
posted by reenum on Jul 5, 2013 - 247 comments

The Underpants Revolution and other stories from the past...

"Whereas yesterday's Cora Pearl was eccentric, charming and a little cold-hearted, today's Victorian courtesan, La Païva, is straight-up eerie. Like, so eerie that a lot of people thought she was a vampire. My hand to Baby Jesus, people actually believed she was a supernatural being. " Bizarre Victoria shares (what else) bizarre, scandalous, and noteworthy stories form the Victorian era (and more). What do you serve at a country club for fat men? Devil's footprints! Lola Montez: servant whipper, de facto ruler of Bavaria. Empress Sissi and her No Good Very Bad Life. Aristocratic marriage at gunpoint. Public pubic hair trimming. Specialties of the Victorian Brothel. Curing hiccups by setting your shirt on fire. Gilded Age Arranged Marriages.
posted by The Whelk on Jul 3, 2013 - 8 comments

truths about gay relationships on the road to marriage equality

Master Bedroom, Extra Closet: The Truth About Gay Marriage
"In the fight for marriage rights, gay activists have (smartly) put forward couples who embody a familiar form of unity... But not all gay unions are built on the straight model, particularly when it comes to the issue of monogamy... The gay rights movement has made a calculated decision to highlight the similarities, not the differences, between straight and gay love on the road to marriage equality."
posted by andoatnp on Jun 20, 2013 - 56 comments

Marriage proposal via handcrafted language lesson

Picture this. You're one of the 3 million-ish users of Duolingo, doing online Italian lessons so you can talk to your Italian boyfriend in his own language. Halfway through one of your daily lessons, you're given the sentence "Lui ti ama" to translate. "He loves you" -- cute coincidence. But then it starts getting stranger.
posted by pont on Jun 17, 2013 - 53 comments

Missing Husband

David and Jason are a married bi-national couple fighting the Defense of Marriage Act which denies gay Americans over 1100 federal rights. This includes preventing gay Americans from gaining green cards for their foreign born spouses. Since meeting in the Spring of 2007, Jason has returned to LA over a dozen times for expensive lengthy visits but is now being warned he will no longer be allowed to visit as a tourist.
posted by Deathalicious on Jun 12, 2013 - 14 comments

France's symbolic fight over same-sex marriage

The French Right Marches against Gay Marriage. Last month, France became the thirteenth nation to recognize same-sex marriage. A large religious and political movement continues to protest loudly against the Socialist government's "Mariage Pour Tous" (Marriage For All) law. [more inside]
posted by mbrubeck on Jun 7, 2013 - 44 comments

The Lords Hath Spoken

18 arguments made against gay marriage in the House of Lords, England, during debate of the Governments proposed Marriage (Same Sex Couples) Bill
posted by marienbad on Jun 5, 2013 - 105 comments

"This moment couldn't get any more perfect"...

To document the amazing beauty of the moment, Photographer Brady Dyer had his girlfriend Emma take a 360 panorama at sunset from their rooftop in Florence, Italy, it ended with unexpected sweetness. [slyt | via]
posted by quin on Jun 4, 2013 - 66 comments

Married to the same man: matrilineal marriages in Bangladesh

Although ethnic Mandi women share power with their male counterparts and are able to own property, the custom of mother-daughter joint marriages continue. [more inside]
posted by lovelygirl on Jun 2, 2013 - 6 comments

This Act may be cited as the Religious Freedom and Marriage Fairness Act

Today is the last day in session for the Illinois House before the summer break, and LGBT advocates are hoping that when they convene at 10:30am, they will address and vote on SB10, legislation already passed by the state Senate to enact marriage equality in the state of Illinois. [more inside]
posted by roomthreeseventeen on May 31, 2013 - 99 comments

Sen. Nesselbush: "Today is so important, I even wore a dress."

Rhode Island is about to vote to become the 10th state (and last state in New England) to enact marriage equality with the unanimous support of the State Senate Republicans. [more inside]
posted by roomthreeseventeen on Apr 24, 2013 - 36 comments

Don't freak out. This will only take a few minutes!

Can we make this thing official? (SLGP) [more inside]
posted by roger ackroyd on Apr 18, 2013 - 22 comments

NZ becomes first country in Asia-Pacific region to approve gay marriage

New Zealand legalises same-sex marriage, becoming the first country in the Asia-Pacific region and the 13th country to do so. The bill was passed with a wide majority, with 77 votes in favour and 44 against. "In our society, the meaning of marriage is universal - it's a declaration of love and commitment to a special person," said Labour MP Louisa Wall. The declaration of the vote was followed by a waiata.
posted by arcticseal on Apr 17, 2013 - 72 comments

Weddings as Art

Weddings are inherently a form of performance art, and various artists have explored weddings as an artistic form. For example, Annie Sprinkle and Beth Stephens held a wedding every year for 7 years to various parts of the environment and Maria Yoon held weddings in every US state to explore marriage as an Asian-American woman. Second Life also hosted a performance art wedding while Gavin Turk and Deborah Curtis incorporated their House of Fairytales project into their own wedding. Kathryn Cornelius married and divorced seven suitors every hour on the hour while Chen Wei-yih opted to marry herself.
posted by divabat on Apr 16, 2013 - 25 comments

Matchmaking in China

"For Ms. Yang, Joy City is not so much a consumer mecca as an urban Serengeti that she prowls for potential wives for some of China’s richest bachelors." [more inside]
posted by cyml on Apr 13, 2013 - 15 comments

Smaller Wallets, Larger Households?

A dozen ultraleft voluntarists arguing about shower schedules is a noise complaint; 120,000 downwardly mobile yuppies doing it out of necessity is a substratum. The material realities of declining wages, ballooning debt, and skyrocketing rents at the core of the neoliberal city have conspired to herd young people into unprecedentedly dense, poor, and precarious kinds of living arrangements. - Andrew Fogle on how the economic crisis is changing how people live together.
posted by The Whelk on Apr 12, 2013 - 55 comments

Uruguay Legalizes Gay Marriage

With 71 votes from the Chamber of Deputies, Uruguay became the third country in the Americas to legalize gay marriage. From the article: While some countries have carved out new territory for gay and lesbian couples without affecting heterosexual marrieds, Uruguay is creating a single set of rules for all people, gay or straight. Instead of the words "husband and wife" in marriage contracts, it refers to the gender-neutral "contracting parties."
posted by zizzle on Apr 11, 2013 - 54 comments

Anarchist Dating Advice

Political Identification: communist
Your problem: I have recently started seeing a communist woman, and I really like her, but my problem is that I still have overwhelmingly strong feelings for the communist woman I had a thing with in the summer, and who has gone to fight the good fight in other lands. Should I tell the comrade I’m currently seeing about my divided affections? As we are not yet in full communism, I fear I may not have enough to go round… From: Bloody Red Heart"
"Dear Bloody Red Heart, Always remember that information is power, and functions as such." [more inside]
posted by the man of twists and turns on Apr 2, 2013 - 35 comments

What's the secret to a happy marriage?

Anyone who tells you their rules for a happy marriage doesn't have one.

"Marriages are made of lust, laughter and loyalty - but the three have to be kept in constant passage, so that as one subsides for a time, the others rise”
posted by The Illiterate Pundit on Apr 1, 2013 - 43 comments

Queer Wars: Return to Prop 8

A Primer for Straights on the Politics of ‘Gay’ Marriage [more inside]
posted by lookoutbelow on Mar 27, 2013 - 107 comments

Gandalf does tlhogh

Patrick Stewart is getting married. Ian McKellan will officiate. [more inside]
posted by justsomebodythatyouusedtoknow on Mar 26, 2013 - 91 comments

SCOTUS Hears Oral Arguments in Prop 8 Case

Earlier today, the Supreme Court heard oral arguments in the California Prop 8 case, Hollingsworth v. Perry. SCOTUSblog has a round-up of their analysis of today's arguments here. NYT article. LA Times article. [more inside]
posted by insectosaurus on Mar 26, 2013 - 398 comments

If it ain't broke, don't fix it!

Santa Fe officials are encouraging same-sex couples to apply for marriage licenses, pointing out that the state doesn't need to pass a marriage equality law because New Mexico law already allows same-sex marriage.
posted by KathrynT on Mar 19, 2013 - 29 comments

The Feminist Housewife

Kelly calls herself “a flaming liberal” and a feminist, too. “I want my daughter to be able to do anything she wants,” she says. “But I also want to say, ‘Have a career that you can walk away from at the drop of a hat.’ ” And she is not alone. Via.
posted by Kitty Stardust on Mar 18, 2013 - 258 comments

Obama officially against Prop. 8

President Obama will file a brief today urging the Supreme Court to overturn Proposition 8.
posted by klangklangston on Feb 28, 2013 - 236 comments

We Found Our Son in the Subway

“I found a baby!” he shouted. “I called 911, but I don’t think they believed me." (SLNYT)
posted by neroli on Feb 28, 2013 - 68 comments

Leftover at 27?

BBC/NRI reports that women in China are being labeled "sheng nu" or "leftover women" after the age of 27. Beyond the traditional family pressure to get married, the Chinese government is applying pressure on single women to get married, fearful that a growing population of single men could cause civil unrest. [more inside]
posted by arcticseal on Feb 21, 2013 - 57 comments

Not allowed: Let's get married, by the Proclaimers. Allowed: Death March

Susan Calman describes some of the legal restrictions of "civil partnerships", why she should never be allowed to get married, and why she loves her wife. A 30 minute podcast from BBC Radio 4.
posted by Stark on Feb 20, 2013 - 14 comments

A Tiny Vietnamese Village Where Women Chose to be Single Mothers

LOI, Vietnam — They had no plan to break barriers or cause trouble. But 30 years ago in this bucolic village in northern Vietnam, the fierce determination of one group of women to become mothers upended centuries-old gender rules and may have helped open the door for a nation to redefine parenthood.
posted by winecork on Feb 15, 2013 - 19 comments

Dear Valentine, I Hate It When You...

Save your marriage... with a writing workshop. Link to paper: (PDF)
posted by AceRock on Feb 13, 2013 - 3 comments

"Now I know to keep my pants on.”

When Bill Met Shelly Bill Ott will always remember the moment he met Shelley Belgard. It was in spring 1988. He was 12 and sometimes shy. Into music, sports and, suddenly, girls.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero on Feb 8, 2013 - 27 comments

She might've called it Getyouracttogether.org, but she changed one word.

Get Your Shit Together helps you do what it says on the tin. After her husband died in a 2009 bike accident, Chanel Reynolds created the site as a step-by-step toolkit to help keep track of important life documents and tasks. Four days after its launch, the New York Times got in on the action. [more inside]
posted by Madamina on Feb 6, 2013 - 28 comments

The British Parliament are debating same-sex marriage

The Guardian is liveblogging the debate. [more inside]
posted by Lemurrhea on Feb 5, 2013 - 102 comments

A Lifetime of Happiness, Part 2

Ada Laurie Bryant, 97, and Robert Mitchell Haire, 86, were married last Saturday. The two met in 2007 at their retirement community and were widow and widower. They began going on regular lunch dates after they both realized they hate going to dinner alone, even though they knew it meant they might be labeled a "couple" by the other residents. The bride is keeping her name.
posted by winecork on Jan 31, 2013 - 21 comments

Not in our backyard

Following an incident at Fort Bragg where Lt. Colonel Heather Mack's wife, Ashley Broadway, was told she could not join the Association of Bragg Officers’ Spouses, the Marine Corps has issued guidance that spouses clubs operating on its bases and installations must offer membership to the same-sex spouses of gay and lesbian service members. [more inside]
posted by roomthreeseventeen on Jan 10, 2013 - 23 comments

Assumption of parentage

In 2009, William Marotta, donated his sperm to a lesbian couple. Although they did not go through a licensed physician, per Kansas state law, the three signed an agreement relieving Marotta of any financial or paternal responsibility. The women, who co-parent 8 children, broke up in 2010, and the state of Kansas is now attempting to get Marotta to pay child support. [more inside]
posted by roomthreeseventeen on Jan 2, 2013 - 232 comments

“I have a tremendous amount of love and support in my life”

A remarkably non-sensational report on polyamorous families. Bookended by 50 Shades of Grey and Gigolos, this 20/20 "special report" on Sierra, Martin, Molly, David, Aaron, Romy, Mark, and J provides a lovely counterpoint to the usual moralizing hand-wringing one finds in media coverage of open relationships.
posted by smammy on Dec 26, 2012 - 14 comments

"It was the first election night I had a husband to kiss."

The Gay Marriage Plot: On November 6, four states -- Maine, Washington, Maryland, and Minnesota -- took the side of gay marriage in ballot referenda. The improbable sweep for an issue that spent decades as an across-the-board political loser has already changed the landscape for gay rights in America -- and could provide a new framework for other causes.
posted by Rangeboy on Dec 11, 2012 - 140 comments

Good news from Washington State

Paul Harris is the head of the Marriage License Department for Clark County, in the American state of Washington. Today, after 40 years with the same man, he can finally apply for his own marriage license. [more inside]
posted by ivan ivanych samovar on Dec 6, 2012 - 104 comments

“Commitment vows are very powerful, even in a cynical era when people aren't afraid of getting divorced,”

Families in Flux:"As household arrangements take new directions, scientists attempt to sort out the social effects" [more inside]
posted by the man of twists and turns on Dec 6, 2012 - 7 comments

I wasn’t so much interested in wedding photography as I was in wedding anthropology

Remains of the Day. "Wedding photographers tend to assume we have the best clients—impervious to things like divorce and disease. But despite the unending blog posts by photographers about the “honor” of shooting so-and-so’s nuptials, we know about as much about our clients as they do about us... Which is another way of saying not much."
posted by muddgirl on Dec 4, 2012 - 31 comments

Justice delayed

In a private conference this morning, the Supreme Court of the United Stated discussed ten petitions relating to the Defense of Marriage Act and Proposition 8. [more inside]
posted by roomthreeseventeen on Nov 30, 2012 - 93 comments

Project Right Side

During his tenure as George W. Bush's campaign manager and later as chairman of the Republican National Committee (RNC), Ken Mehlman helped push an anti-gay agenda which eventually led to legislation that banned same-sex marriage in 21 states. He came out of the closet in 2010. Since then, he's openly supported gay marriage. Now, his newest endeavor, Project Right Side, is trying to attract conservatives to the fight for marriage equality. He discusses the non-profit's goals in a WSJ editorial: Making the Same-Sex Case. [more inside]
posted by zarq on Nov 21, 2012 - 58 comments

Like a vagina booger!

It happens after you've ran out of things to talk about with your partner, after you get your sh*t together and have talked about plans for a family. It is time to get engaged, send out the invitations, and start planning the wedding. NSFW audio
posted by Brent Parker on Nov 6, 2012 - 24 comments

Coronet Instructional Films

From the mid 40s to the mid 50s Coronet Instructional Films were always ready to provide social guidance for teenagers on subjects as diverse as dating, popularity, preparing for being drafted, and shyness, as well as to children on following the law, the value of quietness in school, and appreciating our parents. They also provided education on topics such as the connection between attitudes and health, what kind of people live in America, how to keep a job, supervising women workers, the nature of capitalism, and the plantation System in Southern life. Inside is an annotated collection of all 86 of the complete Coronet films in the Prelinger Archives as well as a few more. Its not like you had work to do or anything right? [more inside]
posted by Blasdelb on Nov 1, 2012 - 41 comments

A lack of a substantial federal question

On May 18, 1970, two Minneapolis men made a shocking request. They applied for a marriage license. Minnesota Public Radio explains how we got from 1970 to now, when a week from Tuesday, Minnesota will vote on Amendment 1. [more inside]
posted by hoyland on Oct 27, 2012 - 5 comments

The Gay Moralist

You are likely already familiar with many of the arguments for and against marriage equality but here are cogent arguments for precisely why it is needed, unthreatening, and beneficial; patiently explained by a gay philosopher who recently spent quite a bit of time hanging out with NOM’s co-founder, Maggie Gallagher. [more inside]
posted by Blasdelb on Oct 25, 2012 - 31 comments

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